Femmes Fetales - (PAL) Holding onto Hope 9 months and on...

[kizzyt]

Amber you poor love, can imagine it is worrying but babies, like adults come
In all different shapes and sizes so I'd bet grace is just going to be a bit diddy, that's all. I think it's great they are keeping such a close eye on you and I'd say do long as you
Keep feeling her wriggling about, she's going to be just fine. Big hugs tho honey xxx

 

[Beanwood]

New - I agree with the others. Everything you are feeling is completely normal. I can remember the worry so clearly. I had an early scan and then couldn't get seen until 14 and half weeks. I was so upset that they couldn't get me in at 12 weeks. It is the most stressful tri I agree with that also.

Amber - It makes me cross when they make statements like that. When I had my second ds they kept saying that he wasn't measuring right for my weeks. The thing is they kept measuring him differently. I then went to the docs at about 33 weeks as my piles were horrendous and I had thrush. The doc measured me said that I was even smaller than previously measured and that she though I was leaking fluid. She phoned hopsital and sent me straight up there. Anyway I wasn't leaking I just had really bad thrush. They booked me in for another scan and everything was fine. I delivered a nearly 8lb baby at 40 weeks and 2 days. I know it is stressful though hun. Have a chat with your doc and tell them your concerns.

Hi everyone. XX

 

[sparkle]

Amber please try not to worry. I had a bunch of extra scans at about your stage with C because he was 'too small' then he was born at 35 weeks and weighed 5lb 8 and didn't spend even a second in special care... Sometimes they just can't tell....
I also have a friend who was told constantly her baby would be so ill because her bump was so tiny, baby was born at 6lb something and is now a perfect 9 month old. Please don't panic xx

 

[shelleney]

New - Oh Hunny!

I remember how you are feeling so well. Life as a PAL member is so hard, isnt it? The innocence and excitement of pregnancy is just stripped away (at least for the 1st tri).
But I do believe that this group of wonderful friends helped me through. We all help eachother through.

Symptoms-wise, I didnt have any until 6 weeks. I didnt get sore boobs until 2nd tri, so that worried me, as I felt everyone else had sore boobs except for me. My nausea started at 6 weeks, but I was never sick. My earliest symptom was exhaustion. I had that every day. But the nausea wasnt that consistent.
If you want reassurance, I would look back on the very first pages of this thread, as you will see that we all went through these worries at the beginning - and look where we all are now! I hope that this will make you feel more positive.

Regarding Docs apts and scans - I found out I was pregnant at 4w1d. I saw my doctor a few days later. And I was booked in for my scan at 5w3d. This was beacuse my last pregnancy was ectopic, and they needed to ensure this baby was growing in the right place. But for you, I would not recommend a scan this early, as you dont actually see anything. There's no baby or heartbeat, just a sac. I was booked in for a scan at 7 weeks, to see the baby and heartbeat. But the day before, I had some spotting. I was terrified, as it was exactly the same gestation as I lost Baby C. I thought I was losing this baby too. So I went to the EPAU at my hospital, where I had a speculum. They said that my cervix was closed, and the spotting was just old blood. I was discharged with no signs of miscarriage, and told to return for my planned scan the next day. My 7 week scan showed a tiny bean with a beating heart. Amazingly reassuring!

Reassurance - my dating scan was booked for 14 weeks of pregnancy. I wasnt sure I could wait that long to know that my baby was ok. I was afraid of missed miscarriage, of going to my scan at 14 weeks and finding the baby had died weeks ago.
I bought a wonderful doppler (Sonoline B) at 9 weeks. I used it every day until my 14 weeks scan. It was such a relief to hear my baby loud and clear every evening before bedtime. i found the heartbeat immediately, right from 9 weeks, every day. I would recommend it to you if you need that reassurance.

Please dont feel embarassed about how worried you are. It is completely normal, especially in PAL! but it does get better as the pregnancy wears on - first tri is a nightmare, second tri gets better, and third tri is a breeze (worry-wise).

We are all here if you need us Take care xx

 

[shelleney]

Amber - sorry to hear that you are worried about Grace's growth. Perhaps the professionals just expected her to be a big baby because of your GD, and are surprised that she is growing normally?
Nonetheless, it is still worrying for you, and they shouldve been more tactful.
Good luck for your appoitnments and scans coming up. Im sure everything will be fine!
Big hugs xx

 

[pixie p]

Hi everyone!

Kizzy - so glad you are feeling better, i did think maybe it was baby engaging when i read your post but obviously she was just preparing herself! Glad to hear all is ok, not long for you now, so exciting!

New - we all know exactly how you feel, 1st Trimester is so so hard and its impossible not to worry. I had loads of ups and downs in my 1st 12weeks (look at my journal). I worried over every symptom or lack of,every twinge etc! The time does go slowly but try your best to stay positive.

Amber - Ive a few friends in your position. Easier said than done i know but try not to worry too much. All their baby's are perfect! My friends little boy was born over 2 weeks early at a healthy 6lb 15 after being sent for growth scans and worrying that there has been no growth and was measuring small. On the other side, my friend was told her baby was going to be huge and was sent for extra scans and was born nearly 40 weeks at 7lb!

Sorry to those i have missed, my son has just pulled the felt tips out and needs my full attention if the walls are to stay 'un decorated!' x

 

[shelleney]

Melly - glad to hear that everything is going well so far. I can only imagine how difficult it is for you and DH at the moment. But remember, we are your friends, and we are here to support you through this time

Amber - totally get you on the "turtle" thing. I need to go "123 roll" everyday too! lol. great news on painting the nusery, and good luck getting the furniture put together. Please dont be concerned about Grace having quiet days. Bo has days where I forget she's even here, because I havent felt her all day. But then there are days like yesterday and today, when she's moving like crazy all day and night! Its completely normal, im sure Grace is fine!

Kizzy - great to hear that your baby is in the perfect position, and measuring the perfect size. Good girl Tink!

xx

 

[Amberyll23]

Thank you for all of your wonderful comments and information ladies, it is all very encouraging and has helped me to feel much better. I am obviously still a bit worried and probably will be until I see the doctor and get to unload on her with all my questions and I get my scan on the 22nd. I can tell DH is a bit worried too, last night he was so focused on making sure I had sufficient protein, dairy and veg in my dinner with minimal carbs/sugars, and was giving Grace extra bump attention.

I agree that it was very wrong of the receptionist/nurse who called me yesterday to give me the info the way she did. Looking back, I was too worried to get upset at the time, but now I am a bit angry about it, and will probably say something to the doctor when I see her. This is the second time in 2 months where the receptionist has gotten me concerned about a test result, etc. Three weeks ago I got a call from her all in a panic about the wrong bloodwork being done and levels being low--so I called back right away only to be told it was a false alarm and the right tests were done, and everything was fine! ARGGGGG!!! I love this group of doctors, but they really need to get better trained staff!!!

On a happy note, we have already toured 2 daycares and have 2 more to tour the week after next. This is going to be a difficult decision for us. We loved both daycares we have toured, but for different reasons.

The first daycare is smaller and closer to our home in the suburbs of the city, and Grace will get lots of one-on-one attention there (what was so cool was that when parents were bringing the little ones in to drop off, they would reach out to the caregiver/teacher excitedly, which really told me that they get lots of love and TLC there, which is so important to me). The downside is that it is about 1/2 hour-45 minutes away from the city, so I could not drop in to visit her during the day.

The second daycare is in the city 2 blocks from where we both work, so I could stop in and see her easily, and they even have a private nursing room available for feedings during the day if I wanted to do that. Also, because it is in the city, there are more opportunities for trips to parks and museums as she gets older that are organized by the center. The downside is that there are a LOT of children, so I am fearful Grace will not get the one-on-one attention that I want her to have. There was also a lot of crying and such going on at drop off time for the parents, which again leads me to think the TLC quality just may not be as good.

We were impressed with the professionalism, cleanliness and organization of both centers. They both do learning activities with the infants and have daily education plans for them that they make the parents part of. They also both have all day private kindergartens (instead of the public school 1/2 days) for when she gets older. The older children (toddlers, etc.) all seemed well adjusted and having a good time.

So, we really have our work cut out for us in making this decision. And we have to make it soon as the really good centers already have waiting lists running into March!!

 

[neffie]

New - Did I already say how glad we are to have you join us here? Like the other ladies have said, 1st tri is definitely the hardest. My 2 cents would be to try and stay positive, and take it one day at a time. It does seem like an eternity reaching that 12 week mark, but you will get there! As for getting an early scan, I think you're doing the right thing by waiting until 6-7 weeks because you won't be able to see much before then. As for POAS, I took one 4-5 days after getting my BFP, and that was it. I would have been a worry wart if I had noticed any discrepancies in the line getting darker, so I decided to be done with it after that. Symptom wise, I had some soreness in my boobs. The queasy feelings didn't start to kick in until about 7 weeks. They're different for everyone, so try not to delve too much into it. We're all here to help you get through those moments of panic, & worrying.

Amber - I am about the call you received, especially since they said that everything was fine at the last scan. I don't have much experience myself in this aspect, but as the other gals have said, I'm sure Grace is doing just fine. Definitely ask a boat load of questions at your next visit. I hope the time flies by until your next visit. I hear you on trying to decide on a daycare. It's a doozie, isn't it? Hope you find the best one for Grace!

Hope everyone else is doing well. :wave:

Getting excited for our appointment tomorrow. We're optimistic that all will go well, and we'll be able to schedule the gender scan. It's finally starting to sink in that this is happening for real, and we hopefully will have Coco in our arms in a few months.

Update on our last doppler session...it was done via webcam since OH was out of town. He kept saying "Gosh, you're taking so much time to find Coco's heartbeat, hurry the heck up!" Geez, can we have some patience? It took me less than a minute to find, but not fast enough I guess. Anyhoo, the look on his face was priceless as always.

 

[Amberyll23]

Hope your appointment went well today, Neffie!

 

[NewToAllThis]

A big thank you to each and every one of you for taking the time to reassure me. Your words were so kind and made me realise that I am going through the extact thing that every PAL lady goes through - especially after reading through Pixies journal as she suggested - so it has helped me heaps!
THANK YOU ALL

Amber, sorry to hear that the nasty receptionist has made you worry. I'm sure Grace will be fine. "good things come in small packages"
Good luck for your scan and hope you make a complaint!

Neffie - how nice that DH got to listen to Coco's heartbeat whilst away - he sounds smitten already

Shell - hope you are enjoying your summer holidays/mat leave - so jealous!

Hi to everyone else

AFM - been out for tea with my mum tonight as my dads out and DH is working! What a trauma...
She talked babies non stop! I had to try so hard not to let my face give it away - I kept changing the subject and she kept changing it back. She even asked me if I was going to go back to the doctors and what the procedure for IVF was!! I felt so bad lying to her but she worries too much and in turn makes me worry (last time was a nightmare!)
I think she only brought it up as its been a long while since we've been out just the two of us and I know she wouldn't dare broach the subject when DH was around.
She made me promise that I would tell her as soon as I was pregnant again, but I just can't do it. Its too early. I've even managed to convince myself that there's nothing there as I feel so "normal" (apart from 10mins of nausea this morning but I think that was because I left the house without having breakfast). It passed once I ate something.

So glad its the weekend - can't make up my mind if I'm tired cos of holiday or this is early symptoms

Anyway - have a great weekend everyone and just so you all know I'm soooo glad to be here even if it is fraught with worry

 

[shelleney]

Happy Saturday!!

Amber - hmmm, thats such a tough decision to make on the daycare. Both centres have their own pros and cons. If I had to make a choice, I would probably choose the first one, with the one-to-one care, and happier babies. Although it would be better if it was nearer your work so you could pop in and visit. Hmm, tough one

neffie - hope your appointment went well. Glad the doppler is being a great reassurance to you and DH. I couldnt have got through the first 20 or so weeks without mine.

New - i completely understand how hard it must be for you at the moment, regarding telling people. With Baby C, we told everyone straight away, and then it was heartbreaking to have to tell them all the bad news. So we decided to wait a while this time round. But you cant bear to lie to the people you love. I ended up avoiding my Mum (and other close family members) for the first 2 months, telling them I was too busy to see them, just so that I didnt have to lie!
Also, I think you are having pregnancy symptoms. The nausea from lack of breakfast is a classic! and so is the exhaustion (holiday or no holiday)! great news, my lovely!!

AFM: i had a midwife checkup yesterday, and everything is going well. Bump is measuring the perfect size, and clever little Bo is presenting head down! it seems that she is getting ready to make her appearance (although hopefully not for another 8 weeks)! Also, the midwife confirmed that she is happy to attend my homebirth if I am still low risk by 37 weeks. woohoo!!
I am off for a posh lunch and photo shoot with my Mum and 21 year old sister today (my mum won this special day experience in a competition) So that will be lovely. I will post some pics later....

Hope you all have a lovely weekend
xx

 

[milosmum]

Goodness - so much happens in 1 week! Sorry I have been MIA but we have been on hols in north Wales, enjoying the scenery and some sunshine. Shame about the solid 36 hours of torrential, horizontal rain in the middle of the week! Enjoyed lots of dog walks we even conquered Snowdon - well DH and Milo walked up, I got the scenic train up and we all walked the five miles back downhill!

I will try to catch up ...

New - CONGRATULATIONS - not sure if I have said that already?!? As everyone else has said 1st tri is a nightmare but nausea and tiredness sounds great to me, very promising symptoms! It was 5-6 weeks before I started to feel pregnant - VERY sore boobs and nausea but the signs came and went on different days and I only calmed down a little bit after our 6 week scan (our 2 previous early scans showed an ectopic and a m/c) so to find baby in the right place witha heartbeat was fantastic. Doesn't stop you panicing before the next scans though! I hope you manage to try and relax and enjoy this time especially if you are going to keep it quiet for a while, I loved it when it was just DH and my little secret!

Neffie - how did your appointment go?

Kizzy - head down already, what a clever baby x

Shellney - glad your appointment went well too, brilliant news on your home birth plans. Hope you enjoyed your day with your mum and sister x

Amber - sorry to hear about the confusion with your last scan. As everyone else has said I am sure it can't be that concerning otherwise they would have had you in for a recheck asap and not waited til your next scheduled appointment. The daycare centres sound lovely, organising visits to local nurseries is on my list of things to do (why is that list getting bigger not smaller?)

I hope that everyone else I missed out is keeping well and getting bigger and more beaten up (obviously baby kicks!) every day xxx

 

[shelleney]

Well, I have had the most shocking day ever (in a good way)!
Myself, my sister and my Mum all got dressed up this morning and headed to the posh hotel, ready for our photo shoot and lunch.....
Only for my Mum's OH to arrive, and tell me and my sister that we were actually there to be witnesses to their surprise wedding!
They had kept it secret from everyone since he proposed at Easter, and had told NO-ONE! and my Mum had come up with idea of a fake competetion win for a day at the hotel.
Im still in shock!! but it was a lovely day!
My Mum and her OH (now husband!) have been dating for nearly 11 years, and im so happy for them! They are off on honeymoon tonight.

xx

 

[NewToAllThis]

Wow Shell. How amazing, can't believe they kept it a total secret. Fantastic!

 

[IMPPEARL]

Just Checking in.... It's a girl!! Photos to come....

 

[kizzyt]

ahh congrats Imp, another girl

Shell, that's so lovely, very romantic!

hi all, hope everyone is well

Its late for me to be up tonight but I had a nap this afternoon for about 1.5 hours and now I cant sleep, especially as OH is snoring like an elephant so I am back downstairs and catching up with my prego buds. Tinks is not up for sleeping right now either so it could be a while for me before I get back to bed!

We had our parentcraft classes this weekend, the NHS ones, they were pretty good. Yesterday was all about labour, pain relief and straight after the birth etc then today was about cleaning/bathing bubs, sleeping, feeding etc. It was really good that Neil came with me as I think he learnt a lot and I certainly learnt some new stuff too, we have our hospital and birthing unit tour on Wed night, really looking forward to that! Our nursery is coming along well too, hoping it will be ready by the end of next weekend so I'll take some pics and post them for you then

Tomorrow I have my baby shower at my mum's with my family and none of them have ever been to a baby shower before so its really exciting. I have made lots of games etc for us to play and bought some decorations plus had someone make some gorgeous cakes for me, I am really looking forward to it. Then Tuesday is my last day at work! Cant believe its here but I am so ready for it, really not up for the commute anymore and I have pretty much mentally checked out already. Hoping for a few sunny weeks before bubs comes along, so I can chill in the garden with my feet in my mini paddling pool, hehe! Then I have another baby shower on Saturday with my girls, there's a big group of us and I am about the 8th to have a baby so we've all been doing the baby shower thing a few years now, its such a lovely day and I feel very spoilt and priveliged having two!!

xx

 

[shelleney]

Woohoo! congrats on the pink bump, Imp!
Where are all the boys? Grand's Little Blue will be lonely!

Ooh, glad to hear your Parentcraft classes went well, Kizzy. Im booking mine this week. Im jealous of you having two baby showers! I wish I was having one. Hope you have a wonderful time at both of them, and get some great gifts. Good luck with your last day at work, and welcome to the world of maternity leave!!

xx

 

[NewToAllThis]

Congrats Imp on team pink

 

[IMPPEARL]

I have to say I'm very excited about my little girl. Everyone I know personally has been or will be having boys (there's about 5 of them). So I was kinda thinking mine may be a boy too. Now for the hard part ... Finding a name I love. I find girls names sooo hard. All I know is that ber middle name will be Ella. After my garden angel (my great grandmother). As for photos I can't get my home Internet working right now I'm so frustrated. So hopfully soon. But she has my dh's little piggy nose that's for sure. Lol