First Time Mom's - Due March/April 2013

[MrsHippo]

Oh dear, I completely understand why your so angry. I'd be really angry myself and I personally would just text her and say 'I can't change that date as everything is arranged, sorry you won't be able to make it' - just keep it short and simple. End of the day if her new boyfriends mother is more important than the christening then she isn't worth it! Don't ignore her though as it will only cause more problems and you'll most likely end up in an argument or fall out.
I have the odd panic once in a while, I'll be fine most of the time then all of a sudden I get this huge wave of worry - about the pain, if something goes wrong, if she has something wrong with her.... I have to try and snap myself out of it. If I was going for a section I'd be s*itting myself as don't do well when it comes to operations or hospital stays. If I could, I'd have chosen a home birth. This place is no where near suitable though. Also, if anything did go wrong at least she'd be in the best place.

I've woke up with back ache loads recently which also just wares off once Im up and moving but this pain is different, is constant. No matter what I do it doesn't ease off. Like I said though, I had that period earlier where it pretty much went but ended up coming back after a couple of hours

 

[doggylover]

Lauren have you phoned your mw and spoken to her about the backache? Might be worth it if it continues through the night. You never know, this could be your early stages of labour and you'll pop to the hospital tomorrow and be 8cm dilated fingers crossed!! But seriously, if it continues, just phone the mw on call and ask - I would suffer for a while before doing that as I wouldn't want to hassle them and you are probably the same, but at the end of the day if you are in discomfort, that's what they are there for!

Hayley That is so selfish of your friend I agree with Lauren - tell her that unfortunately you have arranged the date and booked the church, and because the church is so busy there isn't another date for months, and so you can't change it. Say you're really sorry to put her in the position where she has to choose between her GODCHILD and her new bf's mother, but unfortunately there is no way you can change it. Hopefully she'll get the message. And if not...well that speaks for itself really. I know it's easy for us to say that though, and much harder to do.
Did you ever decide if you are having your mum or OH in theatre with you, as I know you had mentioned in the past that you were worried about a panic attack, and that your mum is great at helping you deal with those. I suppose the only thing I can suggest in concentrating on meeting LO. I think once he is out and you have seen him you will be so concentrated on him that you won't remember about yourself as much, but before that just try and focus on seeing him. Again, a lot easier for me to say than for you to do though!!

Freezer food that is an excellent suggestion about popping it outside! Unfortunately...we can't actually get to our house as the roads are all shut around it. Simon and my dad only got there earlier by parking the car and walking the last half mile, and I don't think they'd be willing to do that to save my freezer food! My mum said she'd help me make some more though. Either that or Simon and i will just starve once lo comes along!!

 

[I Love Lucy]

Lauren, hopefully the cramping is early labor for you. I was hoping my low back pain and contractions was early labor for me but it ended up going away rather then progressing to something.

At my last OB appointment my DH and I were asking about when we should go to the hospital since we are not 100% sure how to tell real contractions from BH. My OB basically said you'll know you're really in labor if the pain keeps progressing to the point that you can't really go about your daily activities. Then at the point you definitely need to get to the hospital. I hear back labor is more painful then regular labor too so I would think if it's real labor you would reach that point a lot sooner.

Hayley, hopefully everything will work out with your family and the visiting hours. I think mine will be respectful since they don't live in this state but I guess we'll just have to see. I will be so irritated if they drive out here though after I've said I don't want visitors at the hospital, I'm only allowed 3 people in the room at a time including DH and while the birthing suite is huge, the postpartum room is really tiny. I just think it would be awful having family shuffling in and out ALL day and would just rather introduce Aiden in the comfort of my own home.

Sorry you're starting to worry a bit about your C Section. Can you mention your concerns to the doctor on Tuesday? Maybe they'll be able to give you something to help prevent a panic attack?

I would be incredibly irritated with the Dori situation too. It's very unacceptable for her to expect you to change your child's christening because her boyfriend's mom's birthday is that. They've only been together for 2 weeks!! And with her track record with guys, I'm not sure I would even be taking their relationship seriously.

Like Sarah and Lauren said, I would tell her you are unable to change the date. I would also probably point out that her new boyfriend's mother will have another birthday next year, your son will only have one Christening. If she is still going to choose her new boyfriend's mother's birthday I'd probably reconsider having her as a godparent. But like Sarah said, it's much easier for me to say that then I'm sure it would be for you.

Sarah, I'm sorry you're not able to get back to your house to get the freezer food outside. At least your mom will help you make some more though.

 

[nuttynicnak]

Lauren, I had back contractions. I didn't find them unbearable just growing in intensity. Are you timing them? I was convinced I wasn't in labour until my waters went.

Sarah-good luck with rescuing the good. Be careful in the snow.

Hayley-is she for real? I'm sorry but I would be absolutely fuming like you. Doesn't she think you have enough to worry about?

I had visitors today. Spent the day running round whilst MIL had foot on poof holding baby. I made dinner for 7 washed up, cleaned up, brews, etc. then midwife came and I had to go to bedroom. Midwife was about to go out and ask everyone to leave as I was sat sobbing in the bedroom. Everyone telling me I looked exhausted and leaving comment "you need to rest" cue floods of tears as OH came back in. He just sat there the whole time and allowed it to happen. My mum would have been doing the ironing, cleaning, washing etc.

Midwife was disgusted when I told her what I'd been doing. Oh was upset when he realised, typical man. Even though he could see I was in pain.

 

[doggylover]

Oh Nic I am so sorry to hear how shitty your day has been. It's exhausting enough having visitors like that without having the pressures of a new baby and all the hormones you are dealing with as well. I can't believe 6 other people allowed you to cool them dinner - shame on every single one of them especially DH and MIL. I'm glad your health visitor was there to help you out in even a small way. I hope Charlotte sleeps well this evening and allows you to get some well deserved rest.

 

[linzylou]

Hi ladies, I'm still trying to get caught up and know I'm leaving out a lot.

Nicola, that's awful. I'm so sorry. We've had friends and family visiting every day so far and it's exhausting. My husband forgets to check with me before scheduling some of them so there have been a few instances where people have had to wait while I sit in the nursery and feed her. How awkward. I can't imagine doing all that you have done! How inconsiderate of your guests. I hope that now you can relax, de-stress, and enjoy your little family in peace like you deserve.

Lauren, maybe you are in the early stages of labor? I would definitely call if they persist!

As for me, I'm still trying to get the hang of things. It's gotten a little easier every day. I wasn't expecting it to happen so soon but my milk came in on day 3 and made breastfeeding horrible. I couldn't get her to latch because I was so engorged and she was screaming and I was crying and it was just not good. I was able to hand express enough to make it work but I've since bought the Medela manual pump (I have a single electric but the manual one works so much faster) to use for a minute or two before I stick her on. Seems to be working and we're actually doing better and I feel a lot more confident. She has lots of wet and dirty diapers and, as of yesterday, is back at her birth weight. I hate how doctors and nurses (at least mine did) put so much pressure on how long and how often she should eat that it was stressing me out. After talking with my pediatrician yesterday, I just feed on demand and don't let her go more than 5 hours, which she doesn't anyway. Also, the Nursing Mother's Companion is a really helpful book!

Her belly button fell off yesterday. She lifts her head when we're laying tummy-to-tummy. We've been to the doctor's twice, Target, and out for pizza. She's usually content in her bouncer and the swing but I feel guilty putting her down sometimes - I would rather cuddle her! I was really overwhelmed the first two days but now I love her so much, and in a way I never thought possible. She's definitely added a whole new dimension to our lives.

We have more family coming tonight and then my sisters-in-law are coming tomorrow. Hopefully that will be the end of visitors for a while. I had a friend come by yesterday and she would not leave. I felt so bad but I was practically delirious from lack of sleep and she wouldn't stop talking about so-and-so's cousin's sister's martial problems and just a bunch of other random stuff all while commenting "I think your baby's hungry" and "you look sooo tired." I love her to death, but yesterday I could have seriously punched her.

A few pics from the last 2 days. I can't believe she's a week old tomorrow!
https://i48.tinypic.com/12633gg.jpg

https://i46.tinypic.com/2h67xmu.jpg

https://i45.tinypic.com/3151r3a.jpg

https://i49.tinypic.com/4qnedf.jpg

39 weeks versus 5 days postpartum. I was 133lbs when I gave birth and am now 115. Pre-pregnancy, I was 103. I had my doubts when people said not to worry about losing the weight afterwards but it really has come off with breastfeeding and healthy snacks.
https://i48.tinypic.com/2s9d2l3.jpg

Wow, this post only took an hour and a half to write!

 

[doggylover]

Holy crap Lindsey- you look like you never had a baby in that tummy!! You sure know how to set the bar high for the rest of us

Love that last pic where she is smiling- or looks like she is- its adorable!

Sorry to hear you have been so busy with visitors, but hopefully you will manage to get a nice quiet day just for you, dh and Sarah to chill out. I can't believe you have been out so much- that's so impressive! You seem to have taken to motherhood like a duck to water- even through the rough patch with breast feeding. Sarah is such a lucky lady to have such a great mom!

 

[linzylou]

Thanks! I don't have much experience with babies under 3 months old so I was worried and thought I'd be totally clueless. Well, I do feel clueless sometimes and I second guess myself a lot. But at the same time the things that I'm uncomfortable with, I know I just have to do or else I'll never get better at it.

About going out, we didn't stay long at Target and she was in her carrier the whole time with a cover on top. Same with the pizza place. I still won't take her to the grocery store or anything like that yet! Too much of a challenge for me and she still seems so little.

You should see my stomach from the front! With all the pregnant sunbathing that I did, it's so much darker than the rest of my body and looks like a huge bruise! I can't really flex my abs yet and the skin feels like bread dough. And let's not talk about the belly button!

 

[doggylover]

well I can only imagine what happens to the belly button afterwards based on how terrifying mine currently looks....it won't be pretty!

And I guess nobody knows what it's going to be like having a newborn- I hope I take to it as well as you have done!!!

 

[MrsHippo]

Nicola, sorry to hear you have had a hard time I think you need to start saying something to OH before things reach that stage, tell him you need help and if you don't want visitors you have every right to say so. Try and take it easy

Lindsey, I love the photos and wow you look really good too!! Can't believe how small your stomach looks. Glad you have figured out bf

Well I literally had back ache all day yesterday apart from a small window around late morning/early afternoon but nothing progressed out of it. Today I am back to my normal self. Still getting pelvic pain which I have been getting for a while now but thats it it could have been anything though, maybe she moved further down or something?

 

[Laura91]

MrsHippo, I feel your pain.. quite literally lol! I get backache for a couple of hours then it moves to belly ache and back round again

Yesterday throughout the night I kept waking with stomach pains and they were still there when I finally decided to get up but turned into nothing

I just wish something would happen - even if its just losing my plug - just so I feel like im progressing some!

To make it worse, OHs friend has just had their baby I want ours now!

Ive eaten a huge dinner today followed by cheesecake in the hope that she will be that cramped up in the there, she'll have no other choice but to come out The only thing its done so far is make me tired xx

 

[doggylover]

Laura I love you're idea of forcing them out via eating lots! I could definitely be up for that!!
I'm the same as you - I just want something to happen to show that this baby may come soon...losing plug, anything! It's so frustrating being so close (or thinking we are getting close) and then just having nothing. And waiting.

Lauren I'm glad your backache is gone, but pelvic pain doesn't sound much like a fun replacement at all. I'm still hoping it all means that things are progressing for you and she is trying to wiggle her way out of there!

Afm: we are now into 64hours of no electric at our house. We stayed with my sister last night, as my mum and dad had no water, but are back at my parents now. We managed to get to our house earlier this afternoon, and it is FREEZING in there.
Good news: we checked the freezer and mostly things are still frozen! Most things are still rock solid, so we are praying that the electric comes on ASAP and saves it. Will give a more thorough check tomorrow as we didn't want it open too long and lose the cold.

Still no sign that lo is planning on doing anything in the near future except staying put. But for the moment that's quite alright, as the roads are still Not good and our house is now soooo cold! But once that resolves lo better get the heck out of my uterus!

 

[linzylou]

Laura, I'm convinced eating a big meal is what started my labor. The day before, my mom and I had a big lunch and then my husband made steaks for dinner. I was so uncomfortable all day. I hope the same happens for you!

Lauren, I'm sure your body is making progress! All of those pains mean something.

Sarah, 64 hours?! That's insane. At least your food is still frozen! When do you think you will have electricity again? That's good that your LO has decided to stay put, at least for now.

Not much going on here. Everyone is still asleep (yes, even the baby) except me. The same thing happened last night between midnight-2am. I just sat there, wide awake, and stared at the ceiling while everyone snored around me! Life's not fair. I did do some online shopping, though! I bought this sling and am ordering some more 0-3 month clothes because Sarah is too big for most of her newborn things but is too small for 3mo. I guess I didn't realize how few 0-3mo things we have.

I love looking at everyone's tickers! Just days to go.

 

[nuttynicnak]

Good news about the food, hopefully it means that you will be able to save a lot of it.

I feel for you ladies, I'd had enough at 36 weeks and LO cam early for me. The last few weeks most be really uncomfortable for you all. Each day gets you all closer though, your LO will soon be here and you'll be in shock, I know I was!

I keep getting excited when I read you have back ache/pains. Hoping this is it for you.

I'm ok today. Slept loads this morning after Charlotte decided not to settle too well last night. In fact we've just pretty much had a lounge and duvet session watching films and tv. Needed it after yesterday. I have spoken to OH and I'm pretty sure a repeat of yesterday won't be happening.

 

[MrsHippo]

Lindsey that sling is really nice what colour have you gone for?

Sarah I can't believe you still don't have electricity, its getting beyond silly now isn't it. Do you live out in the countryside?

I have thought LO would fall out after some meals I have eaten too haha....she is still well and truely stuck up there though.

I don't have a clue what is going off with my body. Its driving me mad, I was alright this morning. We decided to go and do our food shopping, I started getting that back ache again after walking around about 15 minutes so it was nice to come home and sit down. Then about 20 minutes ago I started getting period type pains which were quite strong, enough for me to curl my toes up at anyway. My belly would go hard too then it would stop....that happened about 3/4 times within the space of that 20 minutes. I had a drink of coke too which went down the wrong hole so started coughing, my god that made the pain 10x worse. I was trying so hard not to cough!! I can feel slight pain if I touch my lower stomach or take a deep breath. arrgh!!

Oh and Lindsey and Nicola, when you were having contractions does your belly move? BH sometimes causes my belly to move or change shape slightly and was wondering if real contractions did the same?

Nicola, glad you had a chat with OH and happy that you enjoyed your much needed duvet day

 

[linzylou]

I went with the gray one in the picture. I have a Moby wrap too but it's so confusing! This looks a lot easier and quicker to put on, even though a lot of ladies swear by the Moby.

I honestly don't remember if my stomach changed its shape when I was contracting. I remember sitting in triage at the beginning of labor and not even being able to tell I was having a contraction were it not for seeing them on the screen. Later on they felt like strong period cramps; they started out low and eventually gripped my entire stomach until I couldn't walk or talk or do anything except concentrate on my breathing.

 

[I Love Lucy]

Nic, so sorry your day was so terrible. Shame on everyone for allowing you to do all the cooking, etc. for them. As if you're not tired enough taking care of a newborn. I hope you're able to get some rest tonight.

Lindsey, you look great post baby!! I'm hoping I look just as good as you. Especially since I know I have an extra 15 lbs to lose that I gained while on BC and didn't have a chance to get rid of before I got pg.

I'm also glad that things are improving with the breastfeeding. It makes me feel more optimistic about succeeding with it myself.

Love the sling you picked out. I wasn't planning to use one but DH wants one and the more we've looked the more excited I get about having one.

Lauren, I'm sorry nothing ever came of the back pain. The waiting game is definitely frustrating.

Laura, hopefully something will happen thanks to the huge dinner.

Sarah, glad your freezer food is still good. Hopefully you'll get electric soon. Being without is awful. I remember when I was a senior in high school we had a tornado go through and we were without electricity and running water for 3 days. It was awful considering the first day of school started during that time.

AFM, I'm still dealing with a cold. Last night was pretty rough. Sleeping was difficult before thanks to my belly making turning over and such painful, throw in all the congestion from the cold and sleep was damn near impossible. Not to mention, I drank so much warm tea that I was literally getting up every 5 minutes to pee. By 1 PM I was in tears because of how miserable I felt so I woke DH up to go get me some kind of cold medicine that would provide enough relief that I would actually be able to sleep. Thankfully he got up and went to the store without a single complaint. He then also spent about an hour in the store looking for a medicine that was considered safe according to the list my OB gave me. Still feeling pretty crappy but at least I'm not exhausted on top of that. Hopefully since I have medicine tonight isn't as bad as last night was. I'm so ready for this sickness to be gone.

 

[doggylover]

Brittany that is so unbelievably amazing of DH! If I asked Simon to do that he'd probably beat me What a wonderful husband you have. I hope you are maybe feeling better today? And had a better night's sleep last night. I'm the same about a sling/baby carrier. I never was interested in getting one, but DH insisted, and now we have it I'm so excited to use it!!! He keeps telling me I'm not allowed and that it's his, and the pram is for me lol. We'll see...

Lauren yep we live in the countryside - what would be referred to as the arse end of nowhere by most people! Sounds like your body is just going a little nuts at the minute It either needs to STOP, or get that baby out of there!!

Laura I love that sling, I think the colour is gorgeous. I;ve heard a few people say the Moby is tricky to get the hang of, but keep practising as apparently once you get it it's very simple... (Doesn't look it to me!!) Have you YouTubed any videos to help?

Afm same old same old. Still no electric (day 4). I did wake up in the middle of the night with a pretty intense pain in my bump, and was over the moon...but it disappeared So no labour for me just yet!!

 

[MrsHippo]

Brittany, that was lovely of your husband. I'm not sure whether Adam would do that for me or not lol... I hope it passes soon though, can't imagine feeling like this and have a cold!! You should try eating lots of fruit too, blueberries are really good for your immune system (if you eat them?) oranges are good too. When I caught a cold a few months ago I ate so many berries and I was so suprised that my cold only lasted about 2 days. Before I was pregnant I'd get a cold, it would last weeks then once it went I developed a cough...it was like that every time!!! I was dreading catching something while pregnant because they say your immune systems are weaker don't they? I think I have been quite lucky.

Sarah I bet your getting so fustrated. I have always lived in busy built up areas and can't remember ever having a power cut that lasted any more than an hour or two. They were years ago too, never had one while I have been living where I currently do. The electricity pylons have been damaged though haven't they where you are? I guess that would take longer to sort out than just a power cut. I'd still have expected it to be sorted by now though!!

So today I went for my LAST midwife appointment!! eeek. Typical though, my midwife couldn't be there so I saw a woman I have never met before. She was really nice though. I asked her about these pains I have been getting and she reckons they are good signs something is happening but when she felt my stomach LO isnt engaged yet she said she could feel most of her head still but she is heading in the right direction. I thought the aching meant she had dropped but obviously hasn't.....I have heard they can still drop quite quickly though. My mum told me to start jogging on the spot lol.
I had to make an appointment to see my GP the day after my due date then I have a hospital appointment on the 11th (I think), the midwife said that will be about my induction. *sigh* I hope she comes soon.

Oh and Adam finds out today what number he has come in at on this bloody leaderboard with work. Its silly really, instead of just deciding who to make redundant they decided to do this silly point system. They were all sent a copy of the questions and how its marked - some of the questions were really crappy, like 'does this person look professional, clean and tidy every day at work' I don't think thats a very fair question. Someone's job shouldn't be judged on whether they look tidy every day. Especially when they get filthy anyway!! But once they have marked all the blokes they are all put on this leaderboard thing - between 1 and 20. There are rumours going around that you have to be in the top 10 or so to be safe. But instead of telling them today they are letting them wait until next week before they find out exactly who does and doesn't have a job. Adam's friend has come in at 20....so he thinks he has definately lost his job yet they won't actually tell him that is the case.

Its horrible to go through, I can't imagine what they all feel. This has been going on for ages now too, how can anyone plan anything when they don't know if they have a job or not.

Adam should be in his meeting finding out what number he has come in at now...just waiting for him to call me.

 

[doggylover]

Lauren that is an absolutely horrific way to decide who gets made redundant. I suppose they thought that was the most fair thing to do- to grade everyone on a variety of factors- but then ranking them and TELLING them I think is just cruel. Like that poor guy who is 20 out of 20, how shit must he feel about himself right now? And then to potentially lose your job on top of already feeling not good enough, and being made to hang around? Absolutely awful. Never heard anything like that before, and it just sounds mean.

Sorry to hear LO isn't engaged yet - mine isn't either if that makes you feel better! I keep reading stuff about how first babies engage at 36 weeks - like most pregnancy related stuff that is clearly nonsense! but it makes it feel like they won't be coming for a while, doesn't it? At least the mw was happy she is heading in the right direction. Fingers crossed you won't need our appointment on 11th at all!

And yep, the pylons have basically collapsed here. Simon said the closest one to our house is at a 45degre angle- so no wonder we have no power! They've had to use helicopters to drop work crews in to try and fix it all.

Just back from the hairdressers- it's been 9 months since I got my hair cut! What is it about hairdressers - they either scalp you and take all the hair you've ever had, or they take about 3mm off.there is never a balance!