Found this article on the sun website - what are you thoughts

[annawrigley]

Agreed, that's why I initially wanted a girl as well, and still do at some point in my life

I think her sons will definitely find it, all kids at some point decide to google their name, google their parents names, it's bound to spring up. If I google myself there's a newspaper article from when I was 7 saying I preferred orange smarties and red fruit pastilles there's book reviews I did of Jacqueline Wilson books when I was like 9. That stuff never disappears off the Internet!

 

[Laura2919]

I think it's vile personally.

 

[smokey]

I probably havnt explained this before, it was never a case of I wanted a girl rather then a boy, I want both.
I just always had it in my head since I was little that my first child would be a girl and two years later I would have a boy.
It just came as a shock that affected me more then I realised it would that it didnt turn out this way, same as a woman who has it in her head of how she wants her birth to go but it doesnt happen that way.

In an ideal world I actualy want two of each so that they can all say they have a brother and a sister.

 

[smokey]

Agreed, that's why I initially wanted a girl as well, and still do at some point in my life

I think her sons will definitely find it, all kids at some point decide to google their name, google their parents names, it's bound to spring up. If I google myself there's a newspaper article from when I was 7 saying I preferred orange smarties and red fruit pastilles there's book reviews I did of Jacqueline Wilson books when I was like 9. That stuff never disappears off the Internet!

Oh shock.. how will the other sweeties feel knowing this?

If I google my name all I come up with is BnB, facebook and a bloody dating website that a mate signed me up for as a joke (try explaining that one to your OH why your getting dirty emailes from strangers wanting to meet up)

 

[rwhite]

LOL Anna...

 

[rwhite]

Also, can we pretty pretty please stop throwing the words vile and disgusting around? I haven't been trying to hurt peoples feelings, but I know mine are sure being hurt right now If you don't understand it, that's fine. If you don't WANT to understand it, that's your right and your decision. But please stop the horrible words and making people feel crap for something that they can't help and that will not be changed by name calling.

 

[Laura2919]

Also, can we pretty pretty please stop throwing the words vile and disgusting around? I haven't been trying to hurt peoples feelings, but I know mine are sure being hurt right now If you don't understand it, that's fine. If you don't WANT to understand it, that's your right and your decision. But please stop the horrible words and making people feel crap for something that they can't help and that will not be changed by name calling.

I agree that its vile because she is doing something illegal to get a girl. Its not about what people feel. I wanted girls and I got them so I was over the moon. Being dissapointed is probably a feeling most feel when they think they are carrying a boy instead of a girl or vice versa. I just wouldnt do something like gender selection or anything to make sure I get a girl or boy that I wanted.
If I had another baby and it was a girl and then another and that was a girl too thats what is meant for me..
In my opinion if she does get the girl she so desperately wants she will have her favourite and it will be her little girl... Because she tried so long and hard for her.

 

[pinkbow]

Also, can we pretty pretty please stop throwing the words vile and disgusting around? I haven't been trying to hurt peoples feelings, but I know mine are sure being hurt right now If you don't understand it, that's fine. If you don't WANT to understand it, that's your right and your decision. But please stop the horrible words and making people feel crap for something that they can't help and that will not be changed by name calling.

I agree that its vile because she is doing something illegal to get a girl. Its not about what people feel. I wanted girls and I got them so I was over the moon. Being dissapointed is probably a feeling most feel when they think they are carrying a boy instead of a girl or vice versa. I just wouldnt do something like gender selection or anything to make sure I get a girl or boy that I wanted.
If I had another baby and it was a girl and then another and that was a girl too thats what is meant for me..
In my opinion if she does get the girl she so desperately wants she will have her favourite and it will be her little girl... Because she tried so long and hard for her.

Completely agree

Also say she gets her little girl, but shes disabled? Is that good enough for her?... For some reason i feel it wouldnt

 

[babyno9]

I know for a fact she will not push her boys to one side if she has a girl, she adores her boys, she just wants a daughter as well as her boys. It isn't 'one or the other', just because she wants to go through gender selection treatment to have a girl, her boys won't be going anywhere! They will still be loved the same, looked after the same and treated as equals.

The words 'disgusting and vile' are abit harsh. Thats the kind of thing you'd call a child abuser, not someone who has a gender preference.

 

[Laura2919]

I will just say again that when I agreed that it is vile I am not referring to her 'gender preference' I am referring to the fact she will do ANYTHING to get that girl even resorting to something illegal..
And I am sorry but you dont know 'for a fact' that she would push her boys to one side because no one knows that. I also didnt say she would push them aside I said she would have a favourite and she will have because her little girl is the one thing in life she has tried so long and hard for.. She might not tell you she has a favourite but I am pretty sure she would have..

 

[peanut56]

I am sure this woman loves her boys. I would never say she doesn't. But IMO, there is just no way for this to not affect her boys negatively in some way. Why does she have FIVE boys? Because she was trying for a girl and kept getting boys. If her second or third baby had been a girl, would her youngest boys have ever been born? That's a question I'm sure they will ask themselves when they are older.
I am not saying this woman is vile or disgusting for wanting a girl. I understand that gender disappointment is something that would be very difficult to deal with, and I sympathize with her.
I understand that she is being so open and public about this because she wants to bring awareness to gender disappointment, and that in itself isn't necessarily a bad thing. But doing it so publicly will have a negative impact on her sons. Not only will they now know exactly how their mother felt when she found out they were boys, but so will the whole town/city that they live in.
I'm having a hard time explaining myself here, but I really think she is taking this too far.

 

[Foogirl]

If her second or third baby had been a girl, would her youngest boys have ever been born? That's a question I'm sure they will ask themselves when they are older.

And?

I wasn't meant to be here either. My parents were supposed to stop at two. Mum freely admits she panicked when she was pregnant and didn't want / couldn't afford / didn't think she could cope with a third. Does that make me feel any less loved? not a bit of it. It was her actions after I was born and throughout my life which count.

If this woman has raised her boys and loves them, they won't really care what they google in ten years time.

 

[peanut56]

If her second or third baby had been a girl, would her youngest boys have ever been born? That's a question I'm sure they will ask themselves when they are older.

And?

I wasn't meant to be here either. My parents were supposed to stop at two. Mum freely admits she panicked when she was pregnant and didn't want / couldn't afford / didn't think she could cope with a third. Does that make me feel any less loved? not a bit of it. It was her actions after I was born and throughout my life which count.

If this woman has raised her boys and loves them, they won't really care what they google in ten years time.

Fair enough, but maybe not everyone would deal with it that well. People deal with things differently. Maybe they won't give a crap, and maybe they will. I'm sure your mom didn't have it broadcast in the newspaper like this woman has.

ETA: I also did say that I'm sure she loves her boys and would not accuse her otherwise.

 

[babyno9]

The same could be said for people who fall pregnant by accident and are not happy at first, they don't love thier children any less.

I wanted a boy after going through the loss of my first son, i had seven girl's before having another boy. He is no way my favourite, i love them all the same!

Yes the IVF/PDG treatment is illegal in the UK BUT it is not illegal in many other countries, she is not commiting a crime by having this 'illegal' treatment because in the country she is planning on having it done it is legal.

I would also like to add that the treatment for gender selection is just IVF and the only difference is they take a cell out of the embryo to check which gender it is before implanting it.

 

[Laura2919]

Wherever she is having it its illegal here and I dont agree. You are given the children you are given, we are lucky to be able to carry and then care for a child. No one is ever happy!
I wanted girls and I got them, OH wanted boys and he was a bit dissapointed, I never said that feeling is wrong or vile but what she is doing to get her girl is.

 

[smokey]

Just a thought though, if IVF was made illegal for some reason then would you suddenly think that vile? would the people who have had it done or go elswhere to get it done suddenly be discusting? some people think thats going against nature as well.
Would that still be a case of your given the children your given, ie none

 

[Foogirl]

Wherever she is having it its illegal here and I dont agree. You are given the children you are given, we are lucky to be able to carry and then care for a child. No one is ever happy!
I wanted girls and I got them, OH wanted boys and he was a bit dissapointed, I never said that feeling is wrong or vile but what she is doing to get her girl is.

I do have a problem with the Illegal bit. Maybe there she is going a bit too far.

Fair enough, but maybe not everyone would deal with it that well. People deal with things differently. Maybe they won't give a crap, and maybe they will. I'm sure your mom didn't have it broadcast in the newspaper like this woman has.

ETA: I also did say that I'm sure she loves her boys and would not accuse her otherwise.

The point is, if people are going to judge her, do it taking into account the whole picture. If she treats her boys like the are her whole world, it will not matter to them that she also has a longing for a girl. You can't suggest that simply because of this one action, her boys will be somehow emotionally damaged.

 

[Foogirl]

Just a thought though, if IVF was made illegal for some reason then would you suddenly think that vile? would the people who have had it done or go elswhere to get it done suddenly be discusting? some people think thats going against nature as well.
Would that still be a case of your given the children your given, ie none

People did at first. But it became more accepted when the fears that surrounded it were shown to be baseless. But surely a line must be drawn as to what should happen. I'm not sure where that line should be, TBH, but I'm thinking it should be somewhere.

 

[Midnight_Fairy]

I hate the idea of it fgs just dont have any more if you wont be happy, I just hate the idea, whats next? Choosing hair colour and eyes?

 

[Foogirl]

I hate the idea of it fgs just dont have any more if you wont be happy, I just hate the idea, whats next? Choosing hair colour and eyes?

Yes, that is probably where my line is drawn.