Funny Things you did while in Labour?

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I wanted a chocolate muffin in the middle of labour, and sent my bf to get one. The midwife wouldn't let me eat it, so she got me some toast and butter. so there I am mid contractions munching on toast!
 
When I was in premature labour with this one (was stopped after 10 hours). I pushed the OB/GYN!!! He just kept touching my belly buttong and I had finally had it, but couldn't talk, so I grabbed his arm and pushed him! He never said anything. Oops.
 
Blaumba said:
Ha ha.. this thread is funny!

Here are mine..
OH had got himself a Ginsters pasty from the vending machine and I looked over at him as he took a bite and shouted "CAN YOU JUST STOP FUCKING EATING!!!" so he wrapped it up and went to put it in his pocket and I shouted "NO, IN THE BIN. PUT IT IN THE BIN".
Poor bloke, hadn't eaten properly for about 35 hours by then and I made him chuck his pasty away. Felt so bad after and when I picture it now I still feel a bit sorry for him.

The other one is after the emergency C-section while I was still in theatre off my head on all the drugs the consultant who'd done the surgery came round the front of the blanket to say we were all sorted and everything went well and I held up my hand to him and said "high five".. He looked a bit baffled and I said "high five, high five!" so he reluctantly high fived me, must have thought I was a right fruit cake!.
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that honestly made me laugh til i cried!:thumbup:
 
It's taken me 4 months to find ANY part of my labour even vaguely amusing! I am mortified now, but I swore at everyone, threw the g&a tube at my DH, also threw the wet maternity pads at him (nice!), ripped posters off the wall.......they wouldn't give me an epidural!
They eventually did and 12 hours later when the mw told me to give a "practice push", I did......and peed all over her. About 15 pints as I'd drunk so much water from the g&a dry mouth.
 
I didn't really get to go into labour but on the antenatal ward when they were trying to reduce my blood pressure I remember waking up in the night and in my head I was singing Journey-'Don't Stop Believing' really loudly, as i tend to talk a lot in my sleep you can imagine what must have happened, i was slightley embarrassed the next day :blush:
 
SaraAbi said:
I didn't really get to go into labour but on the antenatal ward when they were trying to reduce my blood pressure I remember waking up in the night and in my head I was singing Journey-'Don't Stop Believing' really loudly, as i tend to talk a lot in my sleep you can imagine what must have happened, i was slightley embarrassed the next day :blush:
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This one really made me LOL.

I normally don't talk in my sleep, but during the last month or two I was talking in my sleep. Seems I called someone a slut, not while in labor but still. It was funny.
 
I got my mum in a half nelson (one arm pinned behind her back and one arm round her neck) and wouldnt let her go!!

During the early stages, my mum and me were dancing every time I had a contraction and the midwife walked in and asked me what i was doing...and i just growled at her!!!


Then It came to the epidural.... bearing in mind i'd had my lady area on show for everyone to see :blush:...... I didnt wanna take my top off because I didnt have a bra on and didnt want people seein my boobs!!!

Oh and apparently according to my OH and Mum.... i was in the later stages (7/8cm dilated) and the midwife came in to examine me...and just as she was about to touch me...i had a contraction...sat bolt upright and like something out of the exorcist said I'M HAVING A CONTRACTION....LEAVE ME ALONE!!!!
 
Well turns out I was talking naughty things about OH and I to my MIL and sister. I don't remember this because I was on some drugs for he contractions cause I was about to have a c-section and was in unneeded pain.

But like I'd be totally on a topic and then the meds would hit and I'd have no clue what was going on....it's like I could be talking about something serious like having baby and then talking about rainbows butterflies and pancakes.
 
I remembered soemthing ....
they insisted on strapping me to monitors (though I kept moving about during contractions which really annoyed them as mw's then kept puytting their arms round me to hold the monitors in place :shrug: at one point I sat on the bed and they had buggered off briefly to leave me alone ....
I started getting really upset and stroppy that we hadnt taken enough bump pictures! and ranting on to OH about how he should have taken more of my bump and a final bump one :rofl: so he took one of me there and then and then I got really angry because it wasnt a proper one because i was all strapped to monitors .......
 
Bump :D

Like this thread so thought i would give it a bump for the new mummies!
 
I threw the flannel at my OH, it was late June and really hot and stuffy he just stood there like a lemon holding a flannel and I screeched 'if you arent' going to f*****g use it then f**k off and go and watch the football....' snatched the flannel and chucked it in his face.
hehe.
I also complimented my midwife on her stitching.
haha.
 
I remember chatting calmly to my midwife between each push about her clogs she was wearing! And asking my OH if he was ok as he was quiet!! The midwife was like 'stop asking him if he's ok you're the one in labour!'
 
bec&1stbump said:
I remember chatting calmly to my midwife between each push about her clogs she was wearing! And asking my OH if he was ok as he was quiet!! The midwife was like 'stop asking him if he's ok you're the one in labour!'
Click to expand...

so did i, i think i was nicer to my boyfriend in labour than i ever am usually!
 
When I had G&A... "My fingers are like sausages and I'm in a big bubble... I need an ambulance or my mummy!". I think I got the MW's respect from being able to quote the Inbetweeners mid contraction.

To anyone that would listen "I'm not wearing pants and I think I've pooed myself!"

To my anesthetist... "I'm not going to lie to you Michael... you're my new best friend"

Oh and to my poor poor DH who was already having issues seeing me in pain "Why aren't you taking my pain away... if you loved me you'd make it stop hurting" xx
 
i was super nice to OH. i dont know why but if i wanted a drink or anything i was saying please and thankyou and telling him i was sorry for being a pain....i bet he wishes i was like that more often :haha:
 
Was pushing for over 12 hours horrible labour - I just had gas and air and remember telling people to go out and buy a load of it cause it was the best stuff ever - I also remember telling people "I'm soooooo highhhh wooooh" lol - I also had a little poo in the water - I also kept saying thank you to the midwives every 5 seconds - my mum tells me that I wouldnt let go of the gas and air when they were telling me to take it easy!
Love reminiscing about birth experience just glad I don't have to ever do it again!! xx
 
i had a water birth with gas and air. i tried to jump out of the pool at one point when on the gas as my hair and feel out and i saw it in the water and thought it was a spider
 
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