Fussy Baby Support

[MrsButterfly]

No Tempted to pay the shipping as people rave so much about it!!

 

[pinklightbulb]

Regretfully pulling a chair up :wave:

How is everyone?

 

[lysh]

Hi Pinklightbulb! You are welcome to join our table! lol

MrsButterfly- That stinks.....I was so tired of buying things that did not work that I almost did not bother getting the Rock n Play. It still has not been the magic bullet, but has been the most effective so far. If I have any chance of being hands free for a few it is with that.

Well I went food shopping and LO screamed her head off with DH until she exhausted herself and fell asleep. Not even a bottle helped....the only thing nthat calms her when she gets like that is my boobs. I feel trapped by my breasts! lol Needless to say she is happily nursing away right now.

 

[jenniferttc1]

6+ months and he is still like this. I really feel im going to lose my F**king marbles soon. Its been a HORRIBLE day.
I know its not his fault and I don't take it out on him, but seriously take a freaking nap already! God friday (girls night out in the town and baby at home with daddy) can't come soon enough!!!!
And of course as soon as I got done writting this my son passed out with his head in his swing tray

 

[bananaz]

Well leave it to my girl to make me eat my words! She was fussy for most of the afternoon and went totally ballistic this evening. Thankfully she's still been easy to put down for naps though, so all is not lost.

 

[libbylou]

LO and I have had a tearful but successful night so far.
She didn't nap much today (normally has 2-3 naps and only had one long one today) so she was in full meltdown by bedtime.

Nursed her to sleep (which is the only way I can get her down to bed).
She woke 20 mins later. I'm tired of being used a human pacifier and nursing her every time she wakes up, which lately has been just about every 60 mins on the dot all night long. If its been a few hours then yes she's probably hungry and I'll nurse her but she darn well doesn't need to nurse after 20 mins of sleep
Spent 40 mins rocking, bouncing, singing and shushing her while she screamed at me for the boob until I gave in and nursed her...but then took her off the boob while she was almost asleep instead of totally asleep
Put her down and shushed and patted her sleep (YAY!!!)
15 mins later she was awake. She fussed and lightly cried for a couple mins until I was able to get in to comfort her...I just patted her and shushed her and she went to sleep. Without nursing. Clearly hell has frozen over

 

[MrsButterfly]

Pinklightclub - welcome to the club How are things for you?

Lysh - even tho we're not bf anymore my lo has bouts of screaming where only I can soothe him. DH finds it really difficult to not be able to help

Jenniferttc1 - if I'm finding it tough now can only imagine how you feel at 6months. Does your lo nap on you or just fight sleep in general? Mine hates sleeping alone in the day and cosleeps at night. I'm getting a lot of pressure from family now to transition him to his cot but I don't feel ready.

Bananaz - altho some fussiness returned I think you're def on the right road. It's what I'm believing anyway as it gives me hope for the magic 3 months!

Libbylou - yay! Well done for persevering.

Pretty rubbish nights sleep here. Hoping for a good nap after this feed....

 

[jenniferttc1]

Currently I have to go gone with him at nap time and feed him to sleep. We are currently working on him falling asleep in his crib during the day but its not going well at all. Only way I can do it is if I was to let him CIO for a good hour till he passedout or something from exhaustion. He went down pretty easy in my mothers house in his room over there where there is a crib. Takes about 5 mins to get him down for 2 hours when I dog sit for her.
It's just becoming a nightmare. I don't want to do CIO at all, but I have no idea how else to go about it I currently either nap with him, or lay him down and sneak away once he is asleep, but he can crawl and roll around now, so he will easily fall out of the bed.

 

[lysh]

Lizzywiz- I kept meaning to respond to something you said that I have thought a lot about:
"It is kind of like I made myself responsible for keeping the baby AND my husband content, now. That's a lot of work and I don't think my husband even knows how much I worry about his sleep and happiness with our new baby life. I need to think more on this..."
I find I do the SAME thing. I worry about my DHs sleep and happiness and ability to relax more than I do my own. Granted he wants to make sure I get my sleep too and if I ask him to stay with DD so I can get out he would, but I do not think he still worries about it like I do him. I wonder why we pressure ourselves so much?

Jenifer- 6 months- geez. I feel for you!!!! I can't blame you for feeling like you will lose your marbles. That is exhausting. I feel on burn out somethings and my LO is only almost 6 weeks. I hate to say it, and I am not sure how I will feel when the time comes, but I sometimes wonder if I will have to do CIO with my LO. I am not sure if she would ever learn to sleep on her own the easy way.

MrsButterfly- Any luck with napping today?

libby- That is a habit I have with LO- I have to nurse her to sleep. Not sure when/how that will end, I figure that is a battle I will have to take up in the future, but for now it is all about survival!!!!
I am also worried that I stick her on my breasts way too much. Whenever she will not stop screaming I stick her on because it is the only thing that calms her down. Part of me feels like I should do what I need to do to soothe her, but the other part is afraid that I am creating a really bad habit. I am not sure if I buy the philosophy that newborns cannot create habits....she definitely looks for it!

bananaz- Some progress I guess is better than nothing! Lol

My DD had a tough night last night due to her diarrhea and stomach cramps. She woke up every hour and a half and by 1:30am I could not fall back asleep! I was also worrying about my classroom etc. so I had some stress induced insomnia. I got to sleep a little when my DH took her in the morning, but boy am I tired. I miss coffee. I did go to my classroom for 4 hours today and my LO survived. I went during a time of day where she tends to be the most sleepy. She was really getting fussy for breast though and my MIL gave her more formula than usual to help keep her calm. Before I go back to work I will have to start weaning her of daytime BFing. I do not want to throw too much change at her at once, especially since fussy babies do not like change to begin with. I hate that I have to go back to work in 3 months. I want to stay home with my baby.

My MIL and DH got her in her Rock N Play today for a while. I tried when I was home and she was screaming within 5 minutes!!!!! All I wanted to do was cut the watermelon I purchased, but DH ended up having to do it! lol The simple things that are so hard to do these days! She has to grow out of this needing to be held ALL of the time at some point, right????

 

[lysh]

BTW- MrsButterfly, I cosleep with my DD as well because she refuses to even sleep in the cosleeper attached to the bed. My question is how the heck would we even transition them to sleep on their own without having to let them cry??? I know my DD certainly would not go down without a fight! That is why I have not bothered yet. I know that day might have to come where she will have to cry but I do not feel she is old enough for that right now. Having her sleep with me is not easy- I have to go to bed with her which is typically between 7:30-8:00 (believe me, I would love to stay up a bit later and actually spend time with DH) but she is so cranky by that time of night that I have to get her to sleep and I cannot leave her in the bed alone. I also miss having DH in bed with me.....he sleeps in the guest room while she is in bed iwth me. But I really do not see another option at this point without having to deal with a lot of crying. I would basically have to let her CIO because soothing her while she is in her cosleeper or Rock N Play does NOT work if she does not want to be there.

 

[jenniferttc1]

It's hard! I just had to drop one of my classes for college before it even begun! I was trying to take the pre test for the class cause I have to pass that before taking it (math) and he screamed the entire time so I said F**k it! There is no way I can do english, anatomy and phsy. and math this semester with him cause he does not like being left unattended. I guess I will have to take it next semester.
Is it time for preschool yet?!?! I'm so envious of all my friends babies going to preschool and kindergarden this year!

 

[bananaz]

It's hard! I just had to drop one of my classes for college before it even begun! I was trying to take the pre test for the class cause I have to pass that before taking it (math) and he screamed the entire time so I said F**k it! There is no way I can do english, anatomy and phsy. and math this semester with him cause he does not like being left unattended. I guess I will have to take it next semester.
Is it time for preschool yet?!?! I'm so envious of all my friends babies going to preschool and kindergarden this year!

Aww but he looks so calm and docile in your photos I seriously can't imagine handling classes and a baby (or at least not a "high needs" baby) - you're a brave woman! I'm planning to start medical school when my LO is a year and a half old and I'm just praying things have settled down by then.

lysh - Sorry your baby isn't feeling well Regular fussiness is hard enough without an upset stomach making things worse!

And yes, she will outgrow the needing to be held thing (or so I'm told!). My girl started tolerating the bouncer for short stretches of time at around 7-8 weeks, and then at 8-10 weeks she started letting me put her down on her playmat. There are still days where she wants to be held every minute (like today!) but most days I can get away with setting her down for 10-15 minutes during each of her "awake" periods before she starts screaming.

libbylou - So sorry your nights haven't been going well, but congrats on your shush/patting success! Here's hoping you're able to keep making progress on that front. My LO also uses me as a human pacifier and I've been trying to find ways to get her to sleep without nursing so that it won't become a habit but most of the time she's hard to get down even with nursing. Agh!


LO has been fussy pretty much all day. I've hired someone to come over and look after her for a few hours a couple days a week but so far baby girl has been way too much for her to handle and I end up having to intervene. So basically I'm paying this girl to sit on the couch and watch me juggle my kid around

 

[jenniferttc1]

It's hard! I just had to drop one of my classes for college before it even begun! I was trying to take the pre test for the class cause I have to pass that before taking it (math) and he screamed the entire time so I said F**k it! There is no way I can do english, anatomy and phsy. and math this semester with him cause he does not like being left unattended. I guess I will have to take it next semester.
Is it time for preschool yet?!?! I'm so envious of all my friends babies going to preschool and kindergarden this year!

Aww but he looks so calm and docile in your photos I seriously can't imagine handling classes and a baby (or at least not a "high needs" baby) - you're a brave woman! I'm planning to start medical school when my LO is a year and a half old and I'm just praying things have settled down by then.

lysh - Sorry your baby isn't feeling well Regular fussiness is hard enough without an upset stomach making things worse!

And yes, she will outgrow the needing to be held thing (or so I'm told!). My girl started tolerating the bouncer for short stretches of time at around 7-8 weeks, and then at 8-10 weeks she started letting me put her down on her playmat. There are still days where she wants to be held every minute (like today!) but most days I can get away with setting her down for 10-15 minutes during each of her "awake" periods before she starts screaming.

libbylou - So sorry your nights haven't been going well, but congrats on your shush/patting success! Here's hoping you're able to keep making progress on that front. My LO also uses me as a human pacifier and I've been trying to find ways to get her to sleep without nursing so that it won't become a habit but most of the time she's hard to get down even with nursing. Agh!


LO has been fussy pretty much all day. I've hired someone to come over and look after her for a few hours a couple days a week but so far baby girl has been way too much for her to handle and I end up having to intervene. So basically I'm paying this girl to sit on the couch and watch me juggle my kid around

He plays it really well seriously out in public he usually acts very well. It's like he hates being at home. I'm really dreading starting college back up 2 classes are online and I have my biology class at the school. Kinda sad when you look Foward to class to get a few hours a week of a break! Lol. I'm really dreading when I start the radiology program its hard without a baby, so it will be tough. The worst part is in the program and career I can not do it and have another pregnancy

 

[MrsButterfly]

Just when I thought we were making progress.... Lo was so good yesterday morning. Then was SO fussy all evening, then up loads more through the night. Am shattered and v frazzled!

Bananaz - that's exactly how I end up whenever anyone comes to help. He will only settle with me so I end up doing everything for him, just with an audience which makes me even more stressed!!

 

[lysh]

I have to say, my LO had a hard time being soothed by anyone but me too, and a couple times I could not stand the crying and would intervene. However, I really am trying to not do that anymore. I need my LO to be able to be soothed without me. It dawned on me that I am not really letting her CIO as she has someone attempting to soothe her. She is not being left alone to cry. She is being held, rocked, offered a paci/formula, given love. As long as the person who is with her can handle it, then I try to let it be (even though it is not easy). It is sometimes hardest in the morning when I am trying to sleep and and she is screaming with DH. Today I gave up at 7:50 and just came downstairs (but I managed an hour and a half of extra sleep). She is also starting to do better with the grandmothers too. I have to be able to get laundry done or clean at some point and when she is with someone is the ONLY time I have.

Jenifer- Yeah, it will be hard getting school work done and having a high needs LO. I wish you luck, but you are right it could end up being impossible with 2!

Bananaz- She will occasionally let me put her down (even though lately I feel like not at all but that could be because she has not been feeling well with her tummy) but it is typically for 5-10 minutes during her awake time and (lately) barely at all during nap time. DH and grandma had some success....but I have not. I feel like she regressed in that...hoping her digestive system calms down that will improve again.

mrsbutterfly- Sorry you had a rough night, I was feeling very frazzled last evening as she would not stop screaming. I had to put her down to brush my teeth and it was like the end of the world came!

DD slept for a 3 hour stretch at the beginning of the night but then woke up every hour after that.

 

[MrsButterfly]

How is everyone doing today? We had a good night - 4 hour and then a 3 hour stretch which was good and I felt miles better this morning. Spent all of yesterday in my pajamas!

Lo has had a good amount of time playing on his playmat today and having a big kick. Also went out to the shops and he sat happily in his pram just looking about.

Love time like this but it makes me scared about what my evening will be like! Don't think I've ever had a calm full 24 hours yet.

X

 

[lysh]

MrsButterfly- Congrats on getting some sleep!!! That is always a good feeling!

Last night was not one of our best nights. LO took a LONG late nap (kept her in my arms so that is why) so she was off. She woke up about every 1-2 hours. Today I have been working hard on trying to keep her on somewhat of a eat, play, nap routine. She just gets herself SO overtired!!! I found that before she gets fussy, if I throw her in my carrier and stick a paci in her mouth and walk around my block she falls asleep. I got her to nap 3 times like that already today. Thank goodness it is not raining!!! That seems to be the only time she will keep a paci her mouth for me.

Since I am combo feeding, I am also going to try to get into a better routine. I am thinking that between my low supply and then giving her formula whenever it seems like she needs it, might not be helping the fussy situation. So I am going to try alternating breast and bottle to see if that helps. So far she has been eating every 2 hours rather than every hour to hour and a half. She has been sleeping better today too. It could also be that her tummy is feeling better- still having no dairy!

How is everyone else doing? Right now LO is napping on my chest and I will probably keep her there for now. She already stayed in her Rock N Play for 30 minutes this morning with DH, slept in my bed for 30 min. (woke up crying twice but basically went right back to sleep), stayed in her stroller for one lap around the block, and played on her jungle gym for 15 minutes. So there is some progress (for now!) lol

 

[bananaz]

MrsButterfly - Glad you had a good day! I hope it continued into the evening and you get more sleep tonight. God knows we all need it

lysh - It's great that you've been able to get her to sleep in her carrier. I hope she keeps taking the pacifier, it seems like a great soothing tool to have on hand - I wish my girl would take one! And it's wonderful that she stayed on her play mat for a while!! Sounds like you are making progress.

Yesterday was okay for us. She wouldn't let me put her down almost all day so I couldn't get anything done but at least she was in a pretty good mood as long as I was holding her. When we got home from a doctor's appointment she was so sleepy that I just set her down in the rock'n'play unswaddled, gave her a couple rocks and she was out! She only stayed down for 30 minutes, but that's a normal nap for her unfortunately. And last night she had a five and a half hour stretch of sleep, which was a nice change.

Today has been going pretty well. She got up way too early but she took a long morning nap so that helped. I also got a Jumperoo for her and so far she LOVES it, though she still wants me to be sitting next to her the whole time.

https://i436.photobucket.com/albums/qq82/lameo77/ffIMG_9009.jpg​

I have the sitter coming over again in a few minutes and I think I'm going to try your advice, lysh, about being more hands-off and letting the girl try to soothe her. I don't know how long I can last though, lol

 

[LittleOnes]

Sounds like you gals are surviving - good and bad moments (no days with a fussy one, you just try to survive that hour and the next and the next!)

I just wanted to give you some reassurance. For the last week my son has done almost a 180. He just turned 4 mmnths a few days ago. Of course, he still has his crying moments, which now often happen in the evening but can sometimes be solved by a stroller or carrier walk - unheard of a few weeks ago! Plus when these moments are fewer and farther between they are so much easier to mentally handle.

He's very smiley for most of the day now, laughs and "talks" with his squeaking and squealing, and is so much more engaged by his toys and books, his own self (hands etc), the outside world and so much more.

I literally did not do anything different, its like a lightbulb went off for him and he's a 'normal' infant. YOU WILL GET THERE TOO!!

 

[lysh]

bananaz- Thank you, I am hoping the progress keeps up! I LOVE that picture- your daughter is adorable!!!!! Good luck, it is not easy. I tend to go to another room and get chores done, if I am in the same room it is harder, plus I feel like DD is looking at me wondering why I am not holding her! lol

littleones- Thanks, it is good to know there is a chance! I am glad things are improving for you and your lo!!!

I was reading somewhere that it depends on the issue- if LO is colicky then things should improve by 3-4 months.If LO is just a high needs baby then it could be a longer issue as it is more just the baby's temperament. So I guess for those of us with babies under 3-4 months it is a waiting game!