Getting Fit Before Baby

[ireadyermind]

Well, last night's OPK was about 25% dark -- a very clear negative.

This morning's OPK was about 75% dark! That was a HUGE jump in a time span of roughly 12 hours. DH and I will be BDing tonight for certain. That OPK could turn positive any time today, so we'll wanna take advantage of it for sure!

Wish me luck! Hopefully we catch that egg!

 

[cupcakestoy]

Go get it girl!

 

[Fern81]

Cupcakestoy - are you doing OK today hun? I think of you ladies & your losses every single day - just keeping you in my thoughts and prayers. So nice to have a supportive hubby. You are truly blessed. Even though our husbands are far from perfect there are things that we will just always need from them - including support. And from what I've read there are so many men who just don't provide this support and stability to their wives. At least this trauma has brought you two closer together. x

Swimmy - any news? I hope you are still beating the odds!

IRYM - Woohooo for impending O! Hope this is it! Been thinking - in RSA you can get a blood sugar stabilizer (Antagolin) over the counter, as well as Inofolic (inositol). Both those products help treat the sugar-related abnormalities in pcos patients but also in pre-diabetic patients and others struggling with insulin resistance. If your dr won't listen and/or won't prescribe anything to help you lose weight, maybe that is worth a try? (If it is available in your country). It won't mess up insulin/sugar levels in non-diabetic or non-pcos cases, it just helps with proper glucose metabolism. I've tried it for 2 months after hearing about how it helps follicle development and had NO side effects; however it's a bit too expensive for me.

AFM - weirdest thing happened last night. So I don't really believe in signs. Last night I was playing a candy crush level which I'd been stuck on for a year. I said to God: "Well if I'm pregnant give me a sign; let me win this level which I'm as unsuccessful at as at falling pregnant" (I was not being serious. God knows that.) I immediately won the freaking level. After a year of trying. Wahaha! (Why didn't I ask to win the lottery as a "sign"??) Anyway, I thought that was something that only those struggling to conceive will ever find funny/ironic....!

I have an "implantation dip" today, am very dizzy/nauseous & crampy, have a super dry mouth, headache and I'm TIRED! I got out of bed this morning and got back in after 30 min... just couldn't move around. Some more classic preg symptoms to add to my list of "Despite all this I'm still getting bfn"-symptoms. Along with last cycle's "implantation" spotting, false positives a few cycles ago, etc etc etc!

Also I'm struggling with eating the past 2 days. Everything makes me cringe. Everything looks & smells like it's wayyyy too oily and gross. Think I have high progesterone levels this month or some weird hormone fluctuations going on. So that has been helping me eat a bit better. I've been doing quite a bit of gardening (good workout!) and after the worst 2 days of AF are over next week I will definitely start HIIT training again! (Actually I want to take a cycle off ttc again... will see if DH will let me!)

 

[ireadyermind]

Go get it girl!

You know it! lmao

IRYM - Woohooo for impending O! Hope this is it! Been thinking - in RSA you can get a blood sugar stabilizer (Antagolin) over the counter, as well as Inofolic (inositol). Both those products help treat the sugar-related abnormalities in pcos patients but also in pre-diabetic patients and others struggling with insulin resistance. If your dr won't listen and/or won't prescribe anything to help you lose weight, maybe that is worth a try? (If it is available in your country). It won't mess up insulin/sugar levels in non-diabetic or non-pcos cases, it just helps with proper glucose metabolism. I've tried it for 2 months after hearing about how it helps follicle development and had NO side effects; however it's a bit too expensive for me.

Wow, hey! I have never heard of the stuff, but thanks for sharing! I am definitely going to have to research those items and see if there's a way for me to get them here. It's definitely worth a shot! If I can't convince 3 different GYNs over the past 10 years to even start trying to troubleshoot my problems, maybe I oughta take matters into my own hands! Within reason, of course. No DIY liposuction.

AFM - weirdest thing happened last night. So I don't really believe in signs. Last night I was playing a candy crush level which I'd been stuck on for a year. I said to God: "Well if I'm pregnant give me a sign; let me win this level which I'm as unsuccessful at as at falling pregnant" (I was not being serious. God knows that.) I immediately won the freaking level. After a year of trying. Wahaha! (Why didn't I ask to win the lottery as a "sign"??) Anyway, I thought that was something that only those struggling to conceive will ever find funny/ironic....!

That's pretty funny. ^_^ Next time you have it in mind to ask for a sign, don't forget to think "Winning Lotto Numbers". Haha




AFM -- Got my first +OPK last night for this cycle, and I'm thrilled that it was NOT on CD33 like it's been the last couple of cycles! This means AF could be about 2 weeks away instead of a MONTH away - I'm pretty happy about that. I mean, I don't like AF, but if my cycles are trying to normalize themselves, I'm all for it. DH and I BD'd last night before we went to sleep, so I'm covered for today.

Got a second +OPK this morning, a little less than 12 hours later. These lines showed up crazy dark and in under 2 minutes, so I know that's one heckuva surge! I wonder if that means anything in particular...? Like, are surges stronger when there's a healthier egg? Or multiple eggs? Or when you're going to ovulate a lot faster than 24 - 36 hours?

My BBT went down a little bit this morning instead of up. I've heard it said that you always get a little temperature dip on the day of ovulation, so that could have happened today! We'll see what happens.

I've had a nagging, minor cold for the past week, so I'm usually dead on my feet by 7pm. I had to really work to keep my eyes open long enough for DH to get home from work, settled in and ready for BD. lol.

If I can manage it, we should probably BD again tonight, just to be safe.

FX'd!

 

[Fern81]

So my temps are back up and I'm having slight brown spotting again... In an ideal world it would be "implantation dip followed by implantation spotting and the beginning of a triphasic chart, yay!" Lol but I know my body so well by now; it most likely is just another weird cycle. Ready for it to be OVER!!!

How's everyone's diets? I bought some whole organic chickens yesterday, these things are huge. I'll pop them in the slow cooker and make diet soups/ chicken and veg portions to go in the freezer. It's much easier when I have ready meals handy instead of having to cook 2 separate meals for DH and myself from scratch every night!

IRYM - I think a super dark line just means loads of LH present. LH is necessary to stimulate the biochemical processes leading to the releasing of an egg from a follie. So an abundance of that specific hormone will hopefully mean a greater chance for a successful ovulation ! Go get it girl!

Cupcake have you been able to start with your gym program again?

xx

 

[Mrs. Tigger]

Hello Ladies

I've been lurking a bit, but haven't really been commenting because I don't really have anything to contribute.

cupcakestory and ireadyermind: I'm so sorry for the losses you girls have had I can't imagine what that must feel like. Hopefully it means that you'll be able to get pregnant again naturally and this one just wasn't sticky.

swimmyj1: I hope that you beat the odds.

Fern81: Sound like you're doing great with the eating well! Keep it up, and just maybe this month is your month -- let's hope so

AFM: I'm chugging along. I think the PCOS diagnosis this spring helped me make peace with the fact that I just won't get pregnant naturally and I should stop stressing over it (I mean, there could always be a surprise, but I don't expect it). Overall, I think this is good, but I admit there's a bit of depression that sets in from time to time. I've been traveling a lot for work this year and I've learned a lot about how to be reasonable and healthy with my diet and manage my PCOS, even when traveling and not having a lot of control over my food, etc. I've stopped weighing my food and counting calories and I'm still losing, which is a sign that I've changed my actual habits rather than just sticking to a plan I've written out. My weight loss is going well -- I've not been updating my stats page, but my ticker is always kept up to date. I just need to lose 8,6 more kilos and then I will be at a weight that they said I need to be to qualify for fertility treatments on the national health service here. I haven't had a period since May (the last 'natural' bleed was in March, then in late April the gyno gave me progesterone to bring on a bleed). I have a check-up with her on October 19th, so I'm looking forward to that. I should be close enough to my goal weight by then that I'll be able to start talking with her about what the next steps will be. The weight comes off a lot more slowly now than it did in the beginning . . . but I'll keep at it; I know I will get there!

I think of you ladies often and as I said, I do lurk here, even if I don't feel like I really have anything to contribute (I'm basically WTT).

 

[cupcakestoy]

Hello Mrs. T! Glad your losing I'm down 4 pounds since m/c ended, but think it was fluid related. I'm back at the gym this week & am doing the calorie counting again, not sure how successful that will be this time but starting there lol I'm feeling much better, less sad & worried, I think my meds are working! I feeling like I'm almost back to normal.....blessed beyond measure this week with my dh & kiddos! It had been hard between them for a while, but with prayer & suffering its getting better. Just hard when a step parent is involved, but from my angle parenting is pretty hard work at times in general! I hope everyone is doing well & sorry about lack of personals, but will try to do better soon!

 

[ireadyermind]

Wonderful to hear from you, Mrs. Tigger! And thanks for your kind words.

Fertility Friend took today's temperature and put my ovulation at a date when I hadn't even gotten a +OPK AND the temp it had selected didn't indicate a sustained rise in my overall pattern... I tried fiddling with the detector settings and it didn't really change, so I put it to OPK and right now it says I ovulated yesterday.

I'll wait until I get some more data, see if my temps stay up or keep rising, and then put it back to the recommended "Advanced" setting to see if anything changes. Meanwhile, DH and I will keep BD every other day until something's confirmed! If we can, that is. It's been a stressful week.

DH got into a car accident yesterday. Everyone involved was fine, but that just means that we might have to pay out of pocket for repairs if insurance doesn't cover the damage. We JUST paid that car off last week, too. Now, more expenses to worry about.

He's been stressed at work, too. They're short a couple of people on their team and that means everyone's taking on an increased workload, and by the end of the day, sometimes the only thing you wanna do is go to sleep. Soooo we'll see if there's in our future... Poor DH.

 

[Fern81]

Ireadyermind - don't stress, FF just loooooves to put O date wherever a temp dip is spotted. I've also had cycles where FF marked O date as a date with low temps; when I had clear EWCM, +OPK, O cramps etc only a few days later (but didn't have an "ovulation dip"). I suspect that your OPK was right instead of FF's first guess! (Conversely, I've also had cycles where FF couldn't pinpoint O at all for me but I knew when it was based on other symptoms, and I have always been proved right when I count my LP backward from the start of AF).

Hope you manage to BD at least EOD girl. DH and I missed the day before O this cycle because we were both way too tired. :/ But EOD should cover all your bases! GL!!

All my tww "symptoms" are gone except for huge sore bbs (which I always get). Glad the cramping has stopped, also I haven't had any spotting again except for the one wipe woohooo! Counting the hours until this cycle is over only 4 sleeps and AF should be here. Will be so happy once this tww is done. Hoping DH will let me take next cycle off again I initially wanted to take clomid next cycle but now I'm just blah, whatever.

I'm reading Bridget Jones' diary again. Laughing so much at her good intentions and emotional eating... Soooo familiar!
One good idea that I got from the book: I might have to start a food diary and work on my emotional issues with food (eating to feel better when I'm down, eating as a reward, eating "because I have to spoil myself", eating when it's AF time...).
A tip that I found in a lifestyle newsletter this week, to help stop eating junk food: get busy. Whenever the craving hits, take a jog around the garden or walk/jog up and down the stairs a few times/ walk around the office etc. Reward yourself with a feel-good book or a bubblebath etc instead of succumbing to eating. Obviously it will take a long long time to retrain myself to stop snacking/eating junk food/emotional eating but I believe it's worth it.
Which is what I'll be trying next. Clearly just trying to diet leads to binge eating for me. I should not just trying to stick to an eating plan and constantly cheating, but also trying to change my emotional habits & lifestyle surrounding food. MrsTigger you managed to do it and truly inspired me!!

 

[ireadyermind]

I'm not really stressed over FF's antics, just wondering why it would completely ignore OPK results and other fertility signs in favor of a temperature dip?

And then today it didn't select the dip, it selected a random day altogether. lol!

I'm pretty sure O day was Wednesday the 9th, since there was a slight dip that day followed by a temp rise.

DH and I managed to BD the day before AND the day after that shift, so I think I have my bases covered. We'll see what tomorrow's temperature says!

 

[Fern81]

Vent alert

Last night I had literally every symptom in the book. I had no appetite (again), had to force myself to eat where normally I have to force myself to STOP eating. I was nauseous, dizzy and had hot flushes (had to sit down while doing the dishes; had to go to bed early), couldn't sleep because I had to get up to use the loo 5 times during the night, blah blah blah... tested this morning with an early detection test and STARK WHITE bfn as usual.
To make matters worse I attended my darling niece's nursery school concert this morning. Every single lady there is either pregnant or cooing over their toddlers. Last year I cried so much at this same concert. This year I just refused to cry and tried to harden my heart. Where we were sitting, in the same row my sis is a mom of twins and there were THREE other couples with twins. Why the F**** can they have so many kids and complain about how crappy & difficult it is, while I can't even have one??

I've been working so hard to harden my heart and to accept that I will never have children (because infertility is soooo freaking traumatic). I've worked hard at moving on and focusing on everything else in my life. Have only started ttc again for DH's sake and already it's ruining my sanity. I feel like a useless piece of dysfunctional garbage.

I'm going to take some time off.

 

[ireadyermind]

Vent alert

Last night I had literally every symptom in the book. I had no appetite (again), had to force myself to eat where normally I have to force myself to STOP eating. I was nauseous, dizzy and had hot flushes (had to sit down while doing the dishes; had to go to bed early), couldn't sleep because I had to get up to use the loo 5 times during the night, blah blah blah... tested this morning with an early detection test and STARK WHITE bfn as usual.
To make matters worse I attended my darling niece's nursery school concert this morning. Every single lady there is either pregnant or cooing over their toddlers. Last year I cried so much at this same concert. This year I just refused to cry and tried to harden my heart. Where we were sitting, in the same row my sis is a mom of twins and there were THREE other couples with twins. Why the F**** can they have so many kids and complain about how crappy & difficult it is, while I can't even have one??

I've been working so hard to harden my heart and to accept that I will never have children (because infertility is soooo freaking traumatic). I've worked hard at moving on and focusing on everything else in my life. Have only started ttc again for DH's sake and already it's ruining my sanity. I feel like a useless piece of dysfunctional garbage.

I'm going to take some time off.

Seeing everyone else with (multiple) babies is the hardest thing when you just want ONE of your own... it sounds like a break is a good idea. I hope your DH is understanding and supportive of you while you go through this!

 

[ireadyermind]

Finally confirmed O today. It was just like I thought! So that means DH and I managed to BD the night before and the night after. I hope we caught that egg!

 

[swimmyj1]

Fingers crossed there are some bfp this month! I've been up north at my cabin all week hiking and kayaking. Did a repeat beta on Tuesday before I left but asked not to know the #s so alls they said was we are back to being causiously optimistic. Ultrasound on the 22nd. But while I'm up here my 19yo cousin anouces her and her bf (of 2 months) are pregnant ... She took a test while she was up here. I wanted to just slap her. Ugh idk why people tell everyone so early.

 

[cupcakestoy]

Decided to take a HPT, just to make sure hcg is gone & It was stark white....which makes me glad, but a wee bit sad too. But in other news I have a ton of EWCM today, so my body is getting back on track! Took an Opk today, my last one, & it threw an error :/ My luck lol but dh & I have been bd at least every other day, sometimes twice a day lol so If there's a chance, we covered our bases In other news, I'm back on my plan & am down 5 pounds since the M/C....Only 10 more to go to get back on schedule.....*sigh

 

[ireadyermind]

But while I'm up here my 19yo cousin anouces her and her bf (of 2 months) are pregnant ... She took a test while she was up here. I wanted to just slap her. Ugh idk why people tell everyone so early.

No kidding! Coworker of mine announced on FB the other day that she's pregnant... at 8 weeks.

I've just always heard from everyone that you're not really out of the woods until you pass 12 weeks, and sometimes not even then! So when I got my BFP in July I only told my mother, my husband, and a close friend. No way was I going to announce it to the "public" or the whole family when we didn't even know if it was a viable pregnancy.

I congratulated her and didn't really say anything else, but it just makes me wonder. If she DOES lose it, now she's going to have to announce that, too.

 

[ireadyermind]

Weighed in today, and it seems my weight is going back DOWN instead of the slow upward creep it had been doing. That's good!

I hope it will continue to move downward... I didn't change anything in my diet or exercise routine, so I'm not really sure what spiked this sudden downward trend except maybe hormones. I wish weight loss was an exact science!

 

[swimmyj1]

Yay for weight loss!!! I agree I wish it was a science that one thing worked for everyone hahaha.

 

[swimmyj1]

*update* started cramping a lot went to the ER, hcg dropped and no more heart beat .... this just sucks. i know i had a bad feeling about it but to be told for sure its over just kinda was horrid. Gonna eat ice cream and cry on my couch tonight then move on tomorrow. I just really hope i don't need a D&C that would just suck.

 

[cupcakestoy]

Oh swimmy, I was holding out hope for you! So sorry for such a cruel loss....hugs doll & take care of yourself!