Home Birthers & Hopefuls!

[Celesse]

Nat, Welcome to the thread!

Djee, I totally intend to continue stalking this thread after baby is born. I'm all set to go now, all I need is for labour to start naturally before 10 March. I will then be at least starting my birth experience at home. Even if I transfer for the delivery I will in part have a home labour and will not be disappointed if it is for a genuine reason.

 

[EternalRose]

Nat, Welcome to the thread!

Djee, I totally intend to continue stalking this thread after baby is born. I'm all set to go now, all I need is for labour to start naturally before 10 March. I will then be at least starting my birth experience at home. Even if I transfer for the delivery I will in part have a home labour and will not be disappointed if it is for a genuine reason.

Happy 37 weeks Celesse, you will be our first resident homebirth graduate. x x

 

[Shifter]

A similar thing happened to me Nat. I went in for RFM at about 34 weeks and although the room we were in had the lights dimmed (it was late evening) and was nice enough, there was a woman across the hall screaming and we saw 4 different MWs in the 1.5 hours we were in there. I knew that with no hope of continuity of care and with women struggling to cope like that there was no hope of my hypnobirthing working for me!

 

[Shifter]

Nat, Welcome to the thread!

Djee, I totally intend to continue stalking this thread after baby is born. I'm all set to go now, all I need is for labour to start naturally before 10 March. I will then be at least starting my birth experience at home. Even if I transfer for the delivery I will in part have a home labour and will not be disappointed if it is for a genuine reason.

Why 10th March? Or is that a stupid question? lol

 

[NattieLou]

Nat, Welcome to the thread!

Djee, I totally intend to continue stalking this thread after baby is born. I'm all set to go now, all I need is for labour to start naturally before 10 March. I will then be at least starting my birth experience at home. Even if I transfer for the delivery I will in part have a home labour and will not be disappointed if it is for a genuine reason.

Why 10th March? Or is that a stupid question? lol

I think because she'll be 42 weeks on 10th March. On a positive note, at my last appt, the midwife said that they've done a few post mature homebirths. As long as everything's looking fine with Mum and baby, it seems their 42 week 'cut-off' is flexible.

On the subject of candles, I imagine most people will prefer proper candles, but with my clumsiness lately (which my husband also seems to have 'caught' ) I wasn't so sure about naked flames. I found some packs of 4 electric tealights in Poundland - bargain! The other advantage is if you do transfer to hospital, you can throw them in your bag to take with you, whereas you wouldn't be allowed normal candles because of naked flames. We'll also be putting up some fairy lights at home for a nice atmosphere.

 

[Mervs Mum]

great idea Nat!

 

[Shifter]

At the end of the day it is still your decision, regardless of policy in your area. I went to 42+1 and they attended me at home with no problems at all. You can still have a home birth if that is what you want and they have to support you in your informed decision.

 

[NattieLou]

At the end of the day it is still your decision, regardless of policy in your area. I went to 42+1 and they attended me at home with no problems at all. You can still have a home birth if that is what you want and they have to support you in your informed decision.

Absolutely. Unfortunately it can be much more of a fight in some places than others, so I'm happy to be living somewhere with a high home birth rate and generally positive attitudes from medical professionals. I feel confident that we won't be easily persuaded into a hospital birth without a good reason, but I'd rather not be in the position where we're having to wrangle with midwives and insist on a SOM coming out.

 

[EternalRose]

Im really hoping if I decide to go ahead with the homebirth Im not going to have to argue the toss when the time comes for them to send someone out to me, with the same old not enough staff on duty excuse e.t.c I mean can you imagine mooing like a cow on the phone, whilst trying to be taken seriously.

 

[Celesse]

Yup 10 March is my over cooked date of 42 weeks.

Me and OH have already had the post 42 weeks conversation. He is very much against leaving her there any longer than 42 weeks. He is both worried about her and also admits to being a little impatient. I don't have a strong enough view either way and will probably be very much ready to have her by 42 weeks if she isn't here at that point. I know that by going in for induction I will enter into the cascade of interventions.

However if I'm showing signs of being close to ready then I wouldn't want induction.

 

[Mervs Mum]

I think we all have to do what feels right to us. That's the whole point of HB IMO. Feeling in control and not conforming to what anyone else tells us is right - only we can decide what's right. If felt 'right' for my sister to have a very medicalised pregnancy and birth. I was her birth partner with her OH and although her labour took a very different pattern to how I'd want mine to, it was HER labour. I didnt try to push anything on her or talk her out of anything because it wasnt my place to.

I think that it's all very personal and doesnt have to be all or nothing. You should make it work for YOU. I dare say I'll be seriously thinking about induction if I go over because I know what it's like. At that point if I feel I have to sacrifice my HB to feel better all round then so be it. If I'm advised to transfer and I think it's the right thing, I wont feel bad or let down - it's just part of the journey.

 

[trumpetbum]

If everything goes to plan I'll be doing it all again in October. I can't wait.

 

[Celesse]

If everything goes to plan I'll be doing it all again in October. I can't wait.

Congrats !!

 

[trumpetbum]

I think we all have to do what feels right to us. That's the whole point of HB IMO. Feeling in control and not conforming to what anyone else tells us is right - only we can decide what's right. If felt 'right' for my sister to have a very medicalised pregnancy and birth. I was her birth partner with her OH and although her labour took a very different pattern to how I'd want mine to, it was HER labour. I didnt try to push anything on her or talk her out of anything because it wasnt my place to.

I think that it's all very personal and doesnt have to be all or nothing. You should make it work for YOU. I dare say I'll be seriously thinking about induction if I go over because I know what it's like. At that point if I feel I have to sacrifice my HB to feel better all round then so be it. If I'm advised to transfer and I think it's the right thing, I wont feel bad or let down - it's just part of the journey.

Wonderfully put.

 

[Shifter]

I absolutely agree Lisa, it is all about choice. Unfortunately many women are not aware of their options and are not given all of the correct, unbiased information to enable them to make informed choices about their birth. I am involved in campaigning to improve that situation, which is why I am always banging on about statistics, research etc! I just want everybody to have all of the information so that the choices they make are informed ones

Everyone is, of course, completely free to ignore me and plough on regardless

 

[Mervs Mum]

Oh it's not a case of ignoring the facts and we all know there lies, damn lies and statistics. We need to look at everything we can find from sources that we trust and then look even further than that to try to get a rounded view.

I do think that there is a very deeply ingrained culture, certainly in the UK, that we have to somehow get permission to have our children the way we want to. I keep reading or hearing women talking about not being 'allowed' to X or Y.....there's a big difference between taking on board advice from experts and trained professionals and feeling you have to have their express permission to do anything. I'll use myself as an example. I just left my sister's where we were talking about breech vaginal deliveries etc. I pretty much decided last night after more reading and research that I do not want to attempt a breech vaginal delivery, where I had been considering it up until that point. Interestingly what swayed me was actually a very positive article showing how it can be done fairly easily - even at home - with the help of MWs who are experienced. I just looked at the pictures etc and knew it wasnt for me. Anyway....my sister and I got talking about what I would do and I said that the MW said they would book me for a section at 39 wks, scan me on the day and do the section if he was still breech. At this point I really would like to wait until 41 wks to have the section. I said this to which she responded 'but will they allow you to wait?' I told her they'd have no choice because I wouldnt be going in early - I want to give him as much time to turn as possible. I said I'd lie if I needed to.
It's this mentality that we are 'allowed' or 'not allowed' to do things with our own bodies that bugs me.

 

[kelly342000]

just found this thread. i am planing a home birth, due 6th march. have just booked birth pool, which should be here soon!

 

[carries]

Im really hoping if I decide to go ahead with the homebirth Im not going to have to argue the toss when the time comes for them to send someone out to me, with the same old not enough staff on duty excuse e.t.c I mean can you imagine mooing like a cow on the phone, whilst trying to be taken seriously.

This made me chuckle! Its my OH's fav part of our homebirthing story. I had drained Nottingham of their 6 canisters of Gas and air and so ran out for about an hour! Moo I did and quite convincingly apparently!

On the La bassine note, we used one for Oscar and the duvet Idea really is helpful. I sat down and delivered (well, i refused to move the whole 9 hours I was in there tbh!) but I can imagine it would get uncomfortable if we hadn't had it there, especially if you are on your hands and knees!

 

[Celesse]

Hello Kelly, welcome to the thread.

 

[Shifter]

It's this mentality that we are 'allowed' or 'not allowed' to do things with our own bodies that bugs me.

Absolutely, same here. I have ranted about that in my blog a number of times lol! It's part and parcel of the same thing. Some people (dare I say most?) have such trust in the medical profession that they simply don't know that they have choices and they don't think to ask. Then they believe the lies, coercion etc and end up being put into unnecessarily risky situations.

I just can't keep my mouth shut. Really don't mean to sound preachy to those who are well-informed