Home Birthers & Hopefuls!

[Mervs Mum]

Of course you can Sarah My hubby wasnt sure at first but has ended up wanting this almost as much as I do.

There are some good links on the OP for Dad's and if you get yourself informed you can help him see the benefits and that HB is perfectly safe in a normal pregnancy

 

[Janidog]

I told my midwife at my 8 week appointment that I would like a home birth and she said that would be fine if it goes well of course. When do you start to properly talking to the midwives about it and setting everything in motion?

 

[urbanbumpkin]

Hello all, hope everyone is doing well.

I was reading a few of the recent posts on low iron levels, and remembered reading about it, and that the basic Hb measure often isn't a useful way to test whether you are anaemic. That measure (Hb) relates to proportion per circulating blood volume, and as our blood volume goes up during pregnancy then the proportion is bound to go down.

This also means I think that if your blood volume has gone up more than average, you may show a low Hb level but not be anaemic.

What they should be measuring is, I think, the 'mean cell volume'. This will more accurately show if you are really anaemic, or if it is just due to increased blood volume. There is a good page here on the home birth site: https://www.homebirth.org.uk/hb.htm and here at midwifery.org.uk: https://www.midwifery.org.uk/anaemia.htm

I thought this was particularly interesting on the Home Birth site:

Here's an extract from the NHS patient information database on Anaemia in Pregnancy:

Investigations Hb < 11.0g/dl 3
MCV (mean cell volume): if < 76fl then probable cause is iron deficiency ...
Normal MCV (76-96fl) with low Hb is typical of pregnancy.​

​

 

[Mervs Mum]

I told my midwife at my 8 week appointment that I would like a home birth and she said that would be fine if it goes well of course. When do you start to properly talking to the midwives about it and setting everything in motion?

I think they start talking to you in more detail later on - after about 30 weeks. You can always raise any questions in advance of that though at your check ups. I wanted to have a proper chat with my hubby there so we arranged a longer appointment for that. I think most women find their MWs leave it till later on so that they can see how your pregnancy pans out as part of their assessing your 'suitability'.

 

[Janidog]

I told my midwife at my 8 week appointment that I would like a home birth and she said that would be fine if it goes well of course. When do you start to properly talking to the midwives about it and setting everything in motion?

I think they start talking to you in more detail later on - after about 30 weeks. You can always raise any questions in advance of that though at your check ups. I wanted to have a proper chat with my hubby there so we arranged a longer appointment for that. I think most women find their MWs leave it till later on so that they can see how your pregnancy pans out as part of their assessing your 'suitability'.

Thank you so much, and great idea about making a longer appointment and bringing hubby along when its all ok

 

[Mervs Mum]

Because my hubby was a bit nervous about the whole thing at the start, I felt a chat with him there would be useful....and it really was

 

[missamoo]

i asked my hubby what he thought about it and he said he wasn't keen in case something went wrong, which was my initial fear. i think i'll try to take him with me to talk to the midwives about it.
i haven't decided for definite if i want a home birth yet but i want to know what all my options are and whether, for me, a homebirth or hospital birth is the best.

i know that for some people they will feel very strongly that a home birth is always the best but i'm not sure yet what's best for me!!

 

[Janidog]

Because my hubby was a bit nervous about the whole thing at the start, I felt a chat with him there would be useful....and it really was

My hubby is quite laid back about the birth (probably panic when it happens) but I know i'll probably forget most of the info, so he can be my second brain

 

[Mervs Mum]

i asked my hubby what he thought about it and he said he wasn't keen in case something went wrong, which was my initial fear. i think i'll try to take him with me to talk to the midwives about it.
i haven't decided for definite if i want a home birth yet but i want to know what all my options are and whether, for me, a homebirth or hospital birth is the best.

i know that for some people they will feel very strongly that a home birth is always the best but i'm not sure yet what's best for me!!

The best place to give birth is always the place the mum feels most comfortable, relaxed and confident. For some that's home and for other's that's a hospital or birth centre - if things go according to plan with this one, I will have done all 3 and each time I was in the best place for ME.

 

[Sparx]

Hi,

Can anyone tell me when I'm meant to have the home visit (where they do the risk assessment etc & talk more about home birth) appointment? I thought it was from 33 weeks onwards? My MW knows I want a home birth and is encouraging about it, but hasn't mentioned booking an appointment to come and see us at home yet...

Thanks!

Shirley.

 

[urbanbumpkin]

My husband came to one of my previous appointments (just to meet the midwife really) but the appointment I am going to have at home next week (at 31 weeks) will be a longer one than normal with him there. The midwife was very flexible about when it was, saying that it could be at weekend if necessary, so long as it was when she was on duty, so that he could be there.

She said to make a list of any questions we may have, and she will take time to go through them all. And she will run through all her normal stuff too, like what she brings along, etc.

edit I would mention it next time you speak Shirley, giving her a prod to organise it won't hurt. But it seems to vary from area to area as to when they do the home visit.

On a different note, how much baby clothing, blankets, etc have any of you got to get you started?

We are not wanting to get too much, as we figure for the clothes we will want to see how big the baby is before buying. And on the sheets, blankets, grobags, swaddling blanket front - we also figure we need to see what the baby responds too. I have heard of some hating being swaddled, or loving it, or hating grobags etc, so don't want to go crazy.

We have got about 7 basic short sleeve no-leg body things (and will get another pack of 5 or 7), 1 long sleeve one and 1 short sleeve one in nice designs for showing off purposes, a light cotton blanket, a fleecy blanket, 2 swaddling blankets (buy one get one half price from gro!), 3 pairs of huggalugs legwarmers, and a couple of lightweight cardigans. Plus a sun hat and a beanie type hat.

All of those are in 0-3 size rather than newborn as both my husband and I were 8lb+ at birth and I am consistently measuring a week ahead, so I figure it won't be super tiny. Does that sound OK to get us going? We have got, or will have, nappies, muslins, cot sheets, etc as well of course, and a sling, car seat and pram.

And we can race out to the local Asda Living/George as soon as we need to!

 

[Bournefree]

I'd get some baby grows too or sleep suits - I couldn't have had enough of those! My LO has only recently started wearing clothes (meaning skirts, trousers etc), as they spend so much time sleeping when they are little, and they need to sleep in something comfortable.

I dressed her with a bodysuit under, and a sleepsuit over the top. It is also handy if you can get sleepsuits with fold-over mitts on the end of the arms - that way they don't fall off them! You can get those types of sleepsuits from Mothercare.

I would also get some socks, they get very cold feet. You can put the socks on over or under the sleepsuits. (the MW like you to put socks on them before the healprick test, so their feet are nice and warm when they prick them - makes the blood flow better, and hopefully will mean they won't have to do it multiple times.

You are right though, you won't need loads of stuff! I only had about 5 or 6 of each... and that did fine until she grew out of them, and then got more from local supermarkets. Sounds like you're all prepared!

xxxx

 

[urbanbumpkin]

Thanks Bournefree!

I had been avoiding sleepsuits, as I keep fretting about the leg length of things with built in feet. Silly probably, but both my husband and I are above average height, so the baby may well be a long one!

But you are right, it probably is a good idea to get a few, and some socks to go with the leg warmers as well. I could get some of those elasticated bottom night gown things too, I had forgotten they existed until just now.

 

[LolaAnn]

My MW knows I want a homebirth but is not encouraging/supportive, and she said she would talk to me about it when I was 36w no sooner.

 

[Bournefree]

yeah - sounds like you could have a long one! but i'm sure that 0-3 will be more than fine for that, they are all pretty generous.

 

[Mervs Mum]

My MW knows I want a homebirth but is not encouraging/supportive, and she said she would talk to me about it when I was 36w no sooner.

Well I'd use the time between now and then to get yourself fully informed so when you do meet her, she knows you are serious and wont be fobbed off

 

[urbanbumpkin]

That is a good positive way to look at it I think, Mervs Mum. There seem to be reoccurring themes of why home birth is being 'disallowed', so if you have read up on those somewhere like the Home Birth website, LolaAnn, then if you do find her bringing anything up at 36 weeks you will already have the counter questions and points ready!

I think so far it has been: large baby, high BMI, low iron, previous PPH, lack of midwives on duty, first baby . . . all of which have been argued against successfully by people on here, I think. Are there any others?

Hopefully when it gets to that stage she will be supportive anyway. She may just be the kind of person who thinks that there is no point organising things until you have to.

But you might want to ask if there is anything she would want you to provide at home other than what they bring themselves, saying you want time to shop around for stuff, if there is.

Not that I think you need much beyond what they provide, but it is a legitimate question to ask in advance and points out to her that you are still planning for a home birth, whether she is talking to you about it yet or not.

 

[Bournefree]

I didn't have my home visit till 37-38, so nothing to worry about there. In any case you can decide where you would like to give birth right until you are in labour. Having a home visit isn't a necessity.

I remember asking this of my MW at my booking appointment - and she said (not in anyway to be discouraging), but lots of things might change in the later stages of pregnancy, which might help me to make a decision - I believe, that is the reason why they don't like to do it too early.

Plus if you are pre-37 weeks, you could still have a HB; but would any of us do that?> I don't know?

But it's all upto you, so even if they don't appear to be proactive about it, they can't make the decisions for you. So as MMum and Urban said, you can be getting on with planning your HB with or without their input until the time is right.
xxx

 

[missamoo]

Thanks Bournefree!

I had been avoiding sleepsuits, as I keep fretting about the leg length of things with built in feet. Silly probably, but both my husband and I are above average height, so the baby may well be a long one!

But you are right, it probably is a good idea to get a few, and some socks to go with the leg warmers as well. I could get some of those elasticated bottom night gown things too, I had forgotten they existed until just now.

i'd get a couple of newborn things in unless ur expecting a 10lb+!
my boy was nearly 9lb but because when they're born they're all screwed up and don't stretch out for a couple of weeks the 0-3 month things were massive on him for a bit. just get the cheap ones from the supermarkets if ur worried.

btw the supermarket sleepsuits are really generous in size and bear in mind that they are supposed to fit 0-3 months and there is a big difference in size between a newborn and a 3 month old.

Then again are you likely to be given much stuff? we were given loads of second hand stuff. but mostly clothes when they were born, altho a few sleep suits.

or u could try charity shops or the nct sales - that's where i got my gro bags from, 2nd hand but perfectly fine and much cheaper than brand new.

my mum knitted sleeping bags for mine - they're great!

most new borns like swaddling btw because it makes them feel secure. esp if they're the sort that suddenly throw their arms out which makes them jump!!

thing is when i had dd you were told to swaddle, when i had ds you were told not to - go wiv ur instincts!!

 

[Bournefree]

I do agree.

DD was 7lb ish when she was born, and the newborn stuff in the suppermarkets didn't fit her.. the only ones that did where mothercare's TinyBaby (which made me feel bad, as she was a normal size??!)

My friend, however, had a 12lb baby and her and her husband are both over 6', her DD went straight into 0-3 (which my LO is only just in now)

Growbag/sleeping bag thingys are great.. but I didn't use them at first; as you said they do like to be wrapped up a little, and there arms don't get covered by them, so can get cold.

So as Mrsamoo said, perhaps some cheap newborn stuff, as they are all quite large in size.

Don't be afraid to get them out the packets and size them up agaist your bump!! It might make you look silly.. but gives a good idea~!
xxxx