How do you stop being frustrated?

[Kipod]

So here's my story in a nutshell: Me and OH- 26 and 27 years old. I am a full time student+ part time job, he has a full time job. My schooling program is super intense and I only have a few opportunities to have a baby without it hurting my studies or being held back a year. And I really want babies, preferably now. Since this year is the last time I can afford to have a baby, after a little convincing OH and I started ttcing. First month trying, to my disbelief- pregnant. Did blood draw- low hcg, a week later mc confirmed when hcg started to drop. Bleeding started at 5w3d, and by this point OH promised we'll try again this month. I was very hopefully, read a bunch of stories on how getting pregnant after a chemical is very common, dtd and waited. I am now cd28 of a 28 day cycle, only bfn's for me so far, except for a nasty evap from Sunday. Next month we will stop trying- I can't afford to have a baby next September. Very sad, but mostly frustrated- next window of opportunity will be in 3 years! I despratly want to trow caution to the wind, try again and take a year off if needed, but than I remember that this is what I wanted to avoid. I am in so deep in the ttcing realm nothing seems to matter but having a baby. OH is supportive, but says he's good either way. What doesn't help matters is that my friend from school got pregnant first month ttcing, and everything is going great. I'm very happy for her, she also wanted kids for a long time, but having her pregnant near me all the time just prevents me from putting it aside and focusing in other stuff- not her fault, just the craziness in my own head.
So sorry for the super long post, I just feel like saying (or writing) thinks out loud will help me deal with things better. Also, I was wondering, how do you deal with things when they don't work out the way you want? Thanks and sorry again

 

[Laska5]

The past 6 months for me have been totally not as planned - thats actually the story of our life! I'm a natural planner & love to plan the future- vacations, future dream home, babies etc. I had a BFP end of June & immediately started planning our life around this baby- we're working hard to pay off some debts so our children won't be affected by them & we can live better- I went back to work full-time, we rushed into getting our house ready to sell so we could move into smaller place before baby came & had a 3 year plan to be out of debt before baby hit kindergarten & I could be a SAHM. Then in the middle of all of that (before we got it on the market - back in August) I had an ultrasound that showed baby was way too small & a week later a mc was confirmed & my plans were devastated - then selling the house wasn't a big deal anymore & now there are projects we never finished that still haven't been done.
I work for the school district so having a March baby would have been PERFECT- not only could I have used 6 weeks paid maternity leave with my baby but that would also run into the summer & I would of had almost 6 months of being a sahm before having to return back to work next fall.
I too was hoping to get back to normal right away on my cycle & try again but month after month since August - it's been a no go. I started my period last week which I'm hoping is actually my cycle starting all over again, I had bleeding for 2 months after my d&c, then had to take progesterone & my doctor said it could take another 3 months for things to regulate. IF this is a normal cycle & we TTC this month it would be AWFUL timing- baby would be due in August which means that would be at the beginning of the school year & I'm actually hoping to find a new position in the fall & interviewing while 6-8 months pregnant probably isn't too promising (I know it's not suppose to matter but it does) and the beginning of the school year is always crazy!
Anyways- I didn't mean to take over your forum but just wanted to let you know that you are not alone in feeling frustrated & I understand!! YES I am VERY frustrated, frustrated that it's the holiday season & I'm not pregnant, frustrated that about every celebrity I know is due in March as well as women at Church I'm close to, frustrated that it's taken nearly 4 months for my cycle to regulate & I'm still not sure if I am or not. Frustrated that timing isn't going to be ideal & just frustrated that this has to be so stinking harder than it should be!!!


Prayers & hugs for you sweetie- it will get better! I've been in a dark place the past couple of months but have been feeling better as time goes on. HUGS to you! & I hope you really don't have to wait 3 years to have your baby!

 

[Kipod]

Laska5, I get you so much... Being a planner sucks sometimes, espcially in times like this when you can't do anything and you can only wait. I'm so sorry for your loss, it sounds really sad. Hope you have your baby soon. I'm in med school, which means I really won't have another chance in the next couple years, which means I have to start getting used to waiting 3 years.
I thought about starting a ttc thread called: So happy I'm not pregnant because...
Just to cheer up some gloomy girls like us
Something about drinking and sushi and coffee exc.

 

[lisap2008]

So sorry about your miscarriage ,I also got a first month lucky BFP but it also ended in miscarriage at 5 weeks its been 6 years sence that BFP with no luck. now I am reaching then end of my baby making years which is very sad . unfortunately babies don't always come along when we want one in fact I see more pregnancies happening in women who are not ready for a baby. good luck I hope your BFP comes soon.