How Many 40 + TTC Au Natural, No meds, IVF etc?

[sunlover72]

**Holds hand up to the OP**

We are in cycle 14 and have tried naturally, with one BFP to show for it (chemical)

Next cycle though if we have no luck we are going to try clomid..

Oh, im 38, my partner is 43.

 

[animalcracker]

Hello ladies!

Do you mind if I join this thread? I am not quite 40...(38) but my DH turned 41 yesterday.

I was pregnant for the first time recently and had a mmc 2 weeks ago. I am still healing physically (from the D&C) and emotionally from that as it left us both devastated and me, very vulnerable.

I am still bleeding from the D&C but my Dr. has given me the go ahead to try again the same cycle as soon as I get AF.

It's wonderful to hear your stories and has made me feel so much better xoxo

 

[Bonny1]

Hello Animalcracker,

I'm so sorry to read your devastating news, I hope your able to keep positive, through such a difficult time.. I think what you've just experienced is very hard, and I'm glad your on here, sharing with other caring posters.. good or bad days, we'll be here..

I'm a homemaker, so I'm always popping on and off line..

be well, and good luck

Bonny

 

[animalcracker]

Hello Animalcracker,

I'm so sorry to read your devastating news, I hope your able to keep positive, through such a difficult time.. I think what you've just experienced is very hard, and I'm glad your on here, sharing with other caring posters.. good or bad days, we'll be here..

I'm a homemaker, so I'm always popping on and off line..

be well, and good luck

Bonny

Thank you Bonny. I am trying to be positive, although it is hard for me as I was also diagnosed with uterine fibroids at the same time I found out about my mmc. I have read about lots of women who have fibroids and go on to have healthy pregnancies so I have all of my fingers and toes crossed I am that fortunate as well.

I really appreciate your kind words and maybe we can share our ups and downs together as we make this journey. I can't wait to be a mother. xoxo

 

[WannaB]

Hello ladies!

Do you mind if I join this thread? I am not quite 40...(38) but my DH turned 41 yesterday.

I was pregnant for the first time recently and had a mmc 2 weeks ago. I am still healing physically (from the D&C) and emotionally from that as it left us both devastated and me, very vulnerable.

I am still bleeding from the D&C but my Dr. has given me the go ahead to try again the same cycle as soon as I get AF.

It's wonderful to hear your stories and has made me feel so much better xoxo

Sorry you had to go through that Animalcracker, they arnt particularly nice are they! Take heart though, many women fall pregnant again quite quickly after a D&C, this pregnancy was straight after my 4th mc, which was a mmc ending in a D&C, I didnt even see a period, just a positive pregnancy test!

MissyMooMoo love your avatar, your pup is too cute!!

 

[Bonny1]

still waiting on AF, but definately not pregnant this month... aaaarrrrggghhh !?!

 

[Marleysgirl]

Hi ladies, I hope to be joining you soon!

We conceived our first very easily when we were both 39 (one weekend of trying!), and I hope that our second will be as much fun and as quick!

At the moment we're WTT as I have a consultant's appointment tomorrow, we need to see if there's any way to minimise the chance of our next baby coming along as early as Andrew did. With any luck he'll give us the okay to TTC

 

[Sally_girl]

Hi Ladies. I'm new to all of this - the forum, and talking about TTC.
Animalcrackers: I'm so sorry for you and your hubby. be good to yourself, and don't let negative thoughts take over. Many of my girlfriends, who are now moms, have had the same experience, and I am sure you will be pregnant soon.
I'm 42, my birthday was yesterday, and we have been trying for about a year. I've wanted to do this as natural as possible, but I have my doubts that it will happen wihtout some kind of chemical intervention. Our next step is a fertility clinic.

I have to ask, if it isn't too personal: how many times a week or a month do you have sex with your husbands? My husband works different hours from me, and often he is getting home after I have gone to bed.

Looking forward to your thoughts!

 

[mogsanddogs]

hi there,am doing it the natural way have had one successful preg at 35 and nothing for 9 years not even a hint until this year when i sadly mc at 9 weeks.i got preg after having completely given up hope .

ivf is out of the question due to cost involved so natural is the only way forward for me and to answer your question about every second night .you will have to get him to wake you up or set alarm for morning fun

 

[Bonny1]

Now, the questions asked by Sally_girl, is one I'm interested in myself..

having had a conversation with a 'specialist' recently, who said I don't qualify for help in anyway ie, IVF ?!? and sent us home, to do it the natural way.. hummf..

anyway, he asked how often we were DTD, and I stupidly answered, when the CBFM tells us, I'm high or ovulating yes he laughed, and said, ok your doing it wrong..

have sex twice a week, no pressure, no stress, just casual loving sex.. forget the schedule, the sperm lives alot longer than we imagine, so we're increase our chances of TTC, by having more regular sex.

so we left, mortified, and feeling very sheepish..

so we're trying to do that.. BUT IT HASN'T HAPPENED YET.

Bonny

p.s. any additional advise would be gratefully appreciated.. lol lol lol

 

[chysantheMUM]

Well before we were TTC we were probably on average once a week but occasionally once a fortnight, which I know doesn't seem like much to some couples but its just the way we've always been because of busy schedules etc Since TTC we've probably been managing to DTD about the same amount every month but been trying to do it at least twice during the week around ovulation, the trouble is, it then started to feel a bit forced and pressured so I'm not sure how we'd get on with the advice your dr gave of twice a week because thats just not normal for us to DTD that often

 

[Omi]

I think the every other day for weeks on end (ok, maybe a week or 2.. ) is fine for those who a) have a high sex drive B) are 25 c) are not too busy with life, work and funny schedules. Im definitely not knocking it its just that, well..Ive gotten pg twice with only the cbfm and once 2 days before ov and once day before. So for me it works the way i do it.

However, for those who perhaps don't exactly know when they ovulate (not so many here, lol) it is definitely the way forward due to being able to catching the egg and always having a 'fresh supply' of spermies hanging around.

At this age i am more worried about the quality of eggs than my actual sex schedule, tbh. Which is why i always hope and pray the 'golden' egg has literally dropped, lol!

It literally only takes one time and the medical profession has a way of being so dismissive as if we're all idiots tinkering with opk's etc not having any clue about our own bodies etc.

I can see the point in not being overly reliant on gadgets etc, but for the love of God, im 40 and not 14! I know what i am doing and i am not naive or gullible. I use the things at my disposal as a guide in tandem with listening to my own body.

It's like when i was pg last. Went in for a dating scan at 8 weeks and were told by the (nasty, devoid of personality tech) that i was 6 weeks. And when i challenged her saying i couldn't be as i even ovulated yet, she just dismissed me and said ov test weren't that accurate - as if i was a total bumbling idiot!!

I have since asked about this both of the senior midwife at the time of my subsequent mc and of my GP and both thought this was an outrageous and an erroneous statement, i.e. i could not have been 2 weeks out -with or without and 'un-reliable' opk

Anywhoo...Ive gone off on a rant...LOL!

Basically, do what works for you and my only suggestion would be to make sure you have sex before you ov so you have sperm ready willing and waiting for the elusive egg.

Good luck ladies and sorry for the mini rant, lol! Im blaming it on entering the bloody 2 ww

 

[Bonny1]

HONESTLY !

We don't have the energy for the 'active programme' suggested by the consultant, and hubby works away!?

so, we're depending on the CBFM to keep us on track, and helping us know our perfect 'days' ..
we're in our 40's too, and I felt like I was at a sex education lesson... we left feeling very stupid tbh.. and kind of humiliated.. and hubby exact words were... 'What a waste of bl**dy time'

so I'm going to stick with the CBFM, and our high and peak day frolicks , and keep our fingers crossed..

Bonny

 

[Omi]

You do that Bonny because i have been pg twice thanks to the cbfm showing the way AND minimal bd so that doc can stick his words in a pipe and smoke them!! LOL!

 

[Bonny1]

These final days, of negative tests, and waiting on the arrival of AF, are really the hardest.. trying to distract myself with just isn't working..






Sunday Update: WELL ruddy Aunt Flo arrived, nice and bright this morning... never mind, DayOne of new the CBFM month

please let this be our month...

 

[Omi]

Sorry Bonny that arrived...

Onwards and upwards babe - im in the 1ww and not really managing the perfect PMA tbh, lol!

 

[babyanise]

sorry bonny
im in my 2ww,it seems to be going so slow.

 

[Nvr2Late]

Hi all! Wow, you make me feel so normal! Hubby and I have always had a fairly scant sex life, and have been OK with that. But when I hear of people happily doing the SMEP I feel like a freak!

Hope to hear some good news on this thread soon!

 

[truly_blessed]

oh Omi, I have just been chuckling at your mini rant... so true. Bet there was smoke coming out of your keyboard.

They did that to me at the 12 week scan, told me I was about 5 weeks and to come back in a weeks time. FFS, in that case I had a BFP 4 weeks before I'd ovulated. They sent me on some guilt trip about 'every pregnancy deserves a chance', really did make me feel awful.

Luckily when I went back 3 days later (after the weekend) I got lovely midwife who said 'if you were a 16 year old girl then I would be making you wait but I can see you know exactly what you're talking about so I'm going to try and book you in for surgery today'

 

[MtnMama]

Here from Pennsylvania,

After 9 unsuccessful months of using opk kits and some nutritional stuff, I came across this forum. (please bear with me as I've never written on a forum before.) So happy you are here. We are also doing this natural, and it seems hard to find over 40 women in the same boat. Even if the ins. covered medical intervention, we couldn't afford the high deductible.

I'm 42, healthy as far as I know, have 3 daughters: 23, 5 and 3 yrs. We'd like 1 more but it seems like nothing is working. Had a humbling, sad MMC on 11/1/09 at 9 weeks and a MC in 1/2010 at 4 weeks.

My routine:
- Cough syrup 5 days before ov
- Evening Primrose Oil before ov
- Fish Oil after ov
- Prenatal pill
- Calcium
- Magnesium
- Potassium
- Vitamin C
- Vitamin B Complex
- Vitamin B6
- Vitamin B12
- Vitamin D
- Baby Aspirin (just in case it's useful)
- 6-8+ glasses of water/day
- Decaf coffee. No caffeine except maybe 5 pieces of dark choc./wk
- Little Alcohol. Extremely hard to cut out cause I love good German & Czech beer. Have about 5 per weekend, spread out.
- Low Sugar. Only sweet is with coffee in a.m. and maybe a piece of choc. in p.m.
- 5+ fruits / veggies per day
- Very little "processed" foods like yummy Doritos, Nutrigrain bars, Keebler cookies.....
- Exercise: Been very addicted to exercise since 16 yrs, so it's hard for me to dial down the intensity, but I'm lifting lighter weights, and I try not to jump rope or do too may high plyo moves after ov. Read that if you are prone to miscarry, exercise should not be intense.
- Lots of prayer and then a gamut of emotions from frustration, anger, depression, determination, optimism, joy, gratitude,...

- Hubby wears boxers or nothing. He takes multi-vitamins, drinks little alcohol of 2 bourbons/weekend and eats the same healthy diet.

Sex:
- Preseed 1-2 oz when DTD
- Limit DTD to when I get a pos. ov with test kit. At the risk of being too informative, I don't think my hubby has enough sperm. The stuff that comes out is only ample on the first day of trying and then afterwards it's significantly lower in volume. So we are worried that he will be depleted by the time my egg appears, if we do it every other day after af stops. Also I'm scared to ignore the directions of doing it like 3 days in a row once you get an pos. ov.
- Missionary style only. Hips propped for 30 min. afterwards. Lay down for 1-2 hrs afterwards to give them a chance without gravity to swim the channel.
- Progesterone Cream at the ready - if I happen to get pregnant, I'll immediately start this cream for a few months to hopefully help, as I suspect this hormone is low at 42 yrs. Refuse to use it after ov. during the 2ww, cause it can make you fat.

Stuff I want to start:
- 1 glass of water with fresh lemon juice. Read this can help balance pH.
- Grapefruit Juice. Read that can help increase CM.
- Yoga: Do very little but want to start 3x/wk
- Relaxation exercises
- Meditation - try 10-20 min./day
- Visualization - try 10 min. 2x/day

The healthy fertile diet of no grains, no gluten/wheat, absolutely no sugar, no alcohol to make this looooong journey bearable, raw foods, no processed foods (which is doable) and absolutely no dairy is impossible for me. I can't understand why, all of a sudden, after 40 I can no longer eat whole grain wheat bread, low fat dairy and moderate sugar.

Scared to try herbs, cause I believe my 2nd MC in 1/2010 was a result of drinking Red Raspberry Leaf tea, Red Clover tea and Peppermint Tea like a fish all day long. Also as I have not been medically tested for Progesterone levels, I can't tell for sure if I need Chasteberry and don't want to mess with my hormone levels without tests.

Seems like since I turned 40 yrs, I'm walking on eggshells with anything I do to help get pregnant and still nothing works. Before 40 yrs, I got pregnant easily with eating pop tarts for breakfast, having full caffeinated coffee and attending advanced, intense spin classes at my Mother's spa before and during pregnancies!

Does anyone have suggestions or advice?

Thank you for being there and willing to share. Sorry for the length.