If I Ov. & my DH has perfect Sperm, why are we Not pregnant???

[Guppy051708]

I just dont understand. I know for a fact that i ov. because an OPK proved it and my BBT confirmed Ov. We A TON and especially on the important days. I know my DH has GREAT sperm because we got pregnant (sadly MC). Now, i am only 9DPO, so i realize there is still hope (only have a 10 day LP though, so AF is due tomorrow). Anyways, even in general, why would a good, healthy couple not get pregnant? If the egg is released and the sperm is there at the right time, why do ppl not get pregnant? I dont understand?

PS i know it can take the average healthy couple 6 months to a year to get a , but why? I just dont understand that if sperm and egg are close to meeting, why don't they just hook up??

 

[laura6914]

I love your thinking hun but only if were that simple. You dont realise how many things effect getting pregnant until you start TTC.

There is CM has to be the right consistancy and PH level for sperm to swin through.

Eggs have to be mature and able to be fertalised.

The egg only lives for 24-36 hours after being released so if the sperm dont get there in time then you miss it.

And so much more.....

Its sssoooo frustrating.

I have been TTC for 2 years and never had a BFP so realise how frustrating it actually is.

Hope you get that soon and im sorry to hear about your loss.

xx

 

[Nimyra]

It's also harder for a fertilized egg to implant if you have a short LP is what I understood. For some couples it just takes longer for all the right conditions to be in place. If you don't conceive in a reasonable amount of time they'll test your hormone levels and see if anything needs tweaking.

It should be so easy, but it isn't always...

best of luck

 

[Guppy051708]

Yes, you ladies are right and correct 100%. And i get that, but if EVERYTHING is the way it should be, then why not?

 

[Adela Quested]

Some other possibilities:
*the egg gets fertilised and then something goes wrong with cell division very early on (before you even get a BFP) so it doesn't implant;
*the egg gets fertilised but then just doesn't implant properly (just a snafu);
*the embryo implants but then cell division goes wrong, again, before you even have your BFP;
Basically endless variations on that theme There are just so many things that can go wrong even when you have a healthy egg and sperm and put them together.

Sorry to be such a downer but I hope that starts to help answer your question - basically, all the ingredients can be perfect but then things just go wrong that leads the pregnancy to give up before it even gets started. In some ways (for couples with good fertility I mean) I think it's just a numbers game, a bit like finding your mate in the first place.

Wishing you lots of

 

[Guppy051708]

Thanks girls, I really appreciate your words of wisdom

 

[emmys_james]

i ask myself this question all the tym but like you i had a m/c and the reasons seem pointless to me. its just not fair. and people that smoke weed and all that horrible stuff get preg, no m/c, no nothing. its just not fair, like seriiusly NOT FAIR. =[ sorry on a downer. lol

 

[Guppy051708]

I feel EXACTLY the same way.
I hate that there are ppl out there who have aboritions, and then there are ppl who REALLY want a baby, with everything in them, and they dont get them or they have to wait a long time to get it.

 

[mommahawk]

It is all a mystery, isn't it?

My dh and I have three beautiful children that we didn't even *try* for, they just wonderfully happened when we weren't preventing...and now 20 months, and *trying*....and nothing...

Add on to that the pp's talking about all the ways things can go wrong...it makes you realize how beautiful a miracle *every* child is...

to all those who've lost their lil' one way too early...