I'm out- how do you all cope?

[unnamed]

Been TTC for 5 mths ( more than that but not watching for ovulation etc untill last 5 mths ).

I know some of you have been trying a lot longer than me how do you cope?

I always think the TWW is the most exciting/ hopeful part but when af in in full flow the worst as I know for sure I am not pregnant and feel sh**** as well!

 

[LLbean]

to you

I guess it's like faith...it's blind...and all you can do is keep on keeping on.

hang in there

 

[Desperado167]

Been TTC for 5 mths ( more than that but not watching for ovulation etc untill last 5 mths ).

I know some of you have been trying a lot longer than me how do you cope?

I always think the TWW is the most exciting/ hopeful part but when af in in full flow the worst as I know for sure I am not pregnant and feel sh**** as well!

Hi Hun,sorry u are feeling so down I was like that last week,and it is so hard,Chin up,this forum is amazing and remember this time next week u will be starting all over again and feeling much better,we are all here for u to help u thru it ,p.s I took up walking and getting fit so I cud focus on something else as well as ttc,xxxxxxx

 

[Indigo77]

I allow myself 5 minutes of disappointment and then remind myself to be grateful that there is hope in the next cycle. I also make my hubby take me out to dinner and enjoy food and drinks I usually attempt avoiding over the rest of my cycle...I also come here...

 

[GraceFace]

It is a combo of what other posters have written, actually. I know my time is limited, but until I have exhausted all avenues. I love this group of ladies, as they help me stay positive and they understand the struggles we all go through at our age.

 

[unnamed]

Thank-you all for your support

I know that there are lots of people who understand and am really glad I found these boards.

Having a glass of lager with my tea!

Desperado I think I do need to take up a hobby that gets me out of the house for a while, I used to have a horse and loved riding and driving before I had my DS so I might take up riding again!


Oh well onward and upward

 

[Desperado167]

Been TTC for 5 mths ( more than that but not watching for ovulation etc untill last 5 mths ).

I know some of you have been trying a lot longer than me how do you cope?

I always think the TWW is the most exciting/ hopeful part but when af in in full flow the worst as I know for sure I am not pregnant and feel sh**** good luck with the horse riding sounds awesome,

 

[Indigo77]

p.s I took up walking and getting fit so I cud focus on something else as well as ttc,xxxxxxx

Me too! I listen to music and walk my dog and am surprised at how much my mood has improved! I also take our dog to the dog park and have a laugh as I watch Lola playing with other dogs. The park itself is a beauty....full of tall pine trees...it just feels good being there!

 

[Ruth2307]

Like Indigo said you can be disappointed for a short while and then you pick yourself up, dust yourself down and keep going. I think everyone knows that I always have a bit of retail therapy too. It goes a LONG way! Alternatively I take my dog out and enjoy the great outdoors and I give myself a good talking to. I try to remember that the world does not revolve around me and I still have a lot to be thankful for! Of course this doesn't take away from the fact that all of us desperately want a happy, healthy baby but it definitely helps me to get back some perspective on what can be a long, hard road.

 

[Indigo77]

I also remember the statistics....On average, it takes women 10-12 months to conceive if they are in their late 30s...I am sure I will be less blasé about this if I get to the 1 year mark without a BFP....but until then, I plan on trying to enjoy the ride...

 

[Nikki Leigh]

This past cycle, I spent the first few hours in a daze/shock after AF arrives. I'd already suspected it to be coming. Then the next morning, had myself a tiny cry. Then I dusted myself off, read my Clomid labeling, and look at it as a new cycle to try to get that BFP.

But I'm not minimizing it--it's HARD to see AF that first day--very discouraging. Especially at our age, when we never know how many more chances we have.

 

[Macwooly]

I do have a lot of admiration for all you ladies who are TTC especially those long term or after a lose.

DH and I TTC for 11 cycles in 2009 and I remember being so upset the day AF showed even though I knew it was coming. I would have a good cry then go for a long walk with my dogs and mentally list all the things I was grateful for in life such as my DH, dogs, etc and by the time I got home (usually a couple of hours) I was ready to face a new cycle.

Every one is different but I found the first couple of unsuccessful cycles for me were the worst until I got my coping strategy in place.

Good luck with your journey and hope you get your BFP before long

 

[karithomp6774]

I am about to start my 5th month TTC and it's so hard each month when AF arrives. And I know 5 months isn't very long...I think we just have to accept the fact it might take longer. I conceived my son the first month but I was only 32 at the time. It's frustrating but we just have to have hope for the next cycle each month!

 

[sarahincanada]

you know for me, as times goes by, its getting easier not harder. I am so used to AF coming that I will be totally floored the month I get my bfp, I just cant imagine it. what works for me is the following:

• believe that it WILL happen some day, it just may take some TIME. feeling that it will happen is a powerful thought. Im a firm believer in whats meant to be will be, and I do believe I will get pregnant sometime. This helps a little.

• do not symptom spot, it can drive you crazy. pregnancy and AF symptoms are practically the same. sure theres some people who have 'never had before' symptoms and end up pregnant, but for each one of them theres a hundred others with 'never had before' symptoms who end up getting their period. I have felt so much calmer this month as I have ignored any so called symptoms, and you know what Ive had far less of them now Im not searching for them

• I know when you get your AF it seems like forever till ovulation and then another 2WW. try to forget the timing thing, the time really does go quickly especially if you are not thinking about it everyday. Try to think of things to keep you busy especially the first week of the cycle and the last week.

• I think we need to try and forget about the age thing as much as possible. It only adds to the stress. I have read that I statistically have 15% chance of getting pregnant each month, compared to 25% for someone under 35. Thats only a 10% different....thats not that bad!!

lastly this forum is great as a pick me up, whether its seeing a 42 yr old get her BFP or knowing that so many others are feeling the same dissappointment when they get their period and know how you feel.

good luck for your next cycle

 

[unnamed]

I love the fact that despite all the struggle everyone has support here and stays positive for at lest some of the time thank you all for taking the time to help me regain my positivity!

Good luck everyone wherever you are in your cycle!

 

[Jax41]

you know for me, as times goes by, its getting easier not harder. I am so used to AF coming that I will be totally floored the month I get my bfp, I just cant imagine it. what works for me is the following:

• believe that it WILL happen some day, it just may take some TIME. feeling that it will happen is a powerful thought. Im a firm believer in whats meant to be will be, and I do believe I will get pregnant sometime. This helps a little.

• do not symptom spot, it can drive you crazy. pregnancy and AF symptoms are practically the same. sure theres some people who have 'never had before' symptoms and end up pregnant, but for each one of them theres a hundred others with 'never had before' symptoms who end up getting their period. I have felt so much calmer this month as I have ignored any so called symptoms, and you know what Ive had far less of them not Im not searching for them

• I know when you get your AF it seems like forever till ovulation and then another 2WW. try to forget the timing thing, the time really does go quickly especially if you are not thinking about it everyday. Try to think of things to keep you busy especially the first week of the cycle and the last week.

• I think we need to try and forget about the age thing as much as possible. It only adds to the stress. I have read that I statistically have 15% chance of getting pregnant each month, compared to 25% for someone under 35. Thats only a 10% different....thats not that bad!!

lastly this forum is great as a pick me up, whether its seeing a 42 yr old get her BFP or knowing that so many others are feeling the same dissappointment when they get their period and know how you feel.

good luck for your next cycle

Well said Sarah!!xXx

 

[future_numan]

you know for me, as times goes by, its getting easier not harder. I am so used to AF coming that I will be totally floored the month I get my bfp, I just cant imagine it. what works for me is the following:

• believe that it WILL happen some day, it just may take some TIME. feeling that it will happen is a powerful thought. Im a firm believer in whats meant to be will be, and I do believe I will get pregnant sometime. This helps a little.

• do not symptom spot, it can drive you crazy. pregnancy and AF symptoms are practically the same. sure theres some people who have 'never had before' symptoms and end up pregnant, but for each one of them theres a hundred others with 'never had before' symptoms who end up getting their period. I have felt so much calmer this month as I have ignored any so called symptoms, and you know what Ive had far less of them not Im not searching for them

• I know when you get your AF it seems like forever till ovulation and then another 2WW. try to forget the timing thing, the time really does go quickly especially if you are not thinking about it everyday. Try to think of things to keep you busy especially the first week of the cycle and the last week.

• I think we need to try and forget about the age thing as much as possible. It only adds to the stress. I have read that I statistically have 15% chance of getting pregnant each month, compared to 25% for someone under 35. Thats only a 10% different....thats not that bad!!

lastly this forum is great as a pick me up, whether its seeing a 42 yr old get her BFP or knowing that so many others are feeling the same dissappointment when they get their period and know how you feel.

good luck for your next cycle

 

[Indigo77]

Yep...what Sarah said...

 

[Shelley71]

Been TTC for 5 mths ( more than that but not watching for ovulation etc untill last 5 mths ).

I know some of you have been trying a lot longer than me how do you cope?

I always think the TWW is the most exciting/ hopeful part but when af in in full flow the worst as I know for sure I am not pregnant and feel sh**** as well!

I know what you mean. I've only been trying for 3 months, and this month was REALLY rough and emotional. I had finally had my first normal cycle, so I was excited and ready to go this cycle. Then, everything fell apart. I never O'd and now I'm at CD 40something again, with nothing to show for it.

I pouted and sulked and got angry for a few days, and now I'm finally coming out of it. I'm still ticked I didn't get a great new cycle. I'm not even that upset that I'm not pregnant. I just wanted a regular cycle of charting, etc.

I say allow yourself some downtime and then pick yourself back up and go at it again. I believe that CD1 to O is WAY worse than the 2WW.

 

[Indigo77]

I believe that CD1 to O is WAY worse than the 2WW.

totally agree...