Is becoming pregnant while obese ethical?

[reedsgirl1138]

Way to go Cami!! I so agree. Who are we to judge what is ethical from person to person? What one person doesn't approve of another will. This topic whether in the debate forum or not is rude and uncalled for...I dont see the issue of "if a person is bipolar so is it ethical for them to get preganant?? Or I am maniace depression"? And no matter what the OP thinks there are plenty of medical reasons that can cause a person to be obese. Most people just have the mind set that person eats snacks all day and is lazy this is not the case most of the time.

I have a cousin who was obese her whole life...her siblings were not. She tried everything to lose the weight but no matter what she gained. The drs couldn't help her but finally did do the band around her stomache and needless to say she ending up passing away after losing 115lbs and complications from her surgery to remove her excess skin from the weight loss...she was made to feel that to be "normal" or to want a family she had to fit into a certain stero type.....so tell me is it ethical to judge who should have a baby and who shouldn't??

 

[MissFox]

Way to go Reeds! I agree- who are we to judge what the criteria for having a child is?

 

[cleckner04]

Way to go Cami!! I so agree. Who are we to judge what is ethical from person to person? What one person doesn't approve of another will. This topic whether in the debate forum or not is rude and uncalled for...I dont see the issue of "if a person is bipolar so is it ethical for them to get preganant?? Or I am maniace depression"? And no matter what the OP thinks there are plenty of medical reasons that can cause a person to be obese. Most people just have the mind set that person eats snacks all day and is lazy this is not the case most of the time.

I have a cousin who was obese her whole life...her siblings were not. She tried everything to lose the weight but no matter what she gained. The drs couldn't help her but finally did do the band around her stomache and needless to say she ending up passing away after losing 115lbs and complications from her surgery to remove her excess skin from the weight loss...she was made to feel that to be "normal" or to want a family she had to fit into a certain stero type.....so tell me is it ethical to judge who should have a baby and who shouldn't??

That's so sad. I'm sorry you lost your cousin. It's a shame how judgmental the world can be.

 

[babyerin]

I am sorry about your cousin too reeds

 

[TattiesMum]

Aye but here's the thing - research is conducted by people and read by people. People can only do this from their own subjective viewpoint, so total objectivity is a myth. People tend to look for what they want to find. It's entirely possible to NOT find what you'd like to deny too.

Sorry but saying obesity is not a health risk is denial. Many other health risks exist, of course! We ALL have risk factors! This isn't a risk-free world, we all know that. And no-one's saying ALL obese people are lazy junk-food guzzling slobs! But the facts are there if you look for them.

Of course research can be objective LOL .... blind studies of a large random sampling - where non-involved researchers are given all details of pregnancy outcomes in terms of measurable problems (blood pressure, length of gestation, length of labour stages, post natal haemorraging etc, Apgar scores, physical abnormalities/problems of the child etc) , but no maternal details, would provide objective facts that could then be broken down into BMI groups once the information had been collected.

And yes of course you are right in saying that obesity is a health risk in it's own right - regardless of pregnancy - and I don't believe I said otherwise. But I have to say that in all honesty - if a little tongue in cheek - that life itself is a health risk

Given my profession I'm quite prosaic about the fact that it doesn't matter what your weight, diet, habits, lifestyle or anything else - it is inevitable that you will eventually be being cared for by one of my colleagues and I have to say that I have never had a client yet who's death has been caused either directly or indirectly by obesity, even though I have obviously had obese clients.

That's not denial - I'm not denying that obesity is not healthy - it's my own subjective experience ... which is as worthless as any opinion given by a health professional without proper blind research results and without taking into account more factors than simply weight/BMI when classifying a Mum to Be as 'High Risk'.

 

[Cloberella]

Thank you to whoever pointed out that in my original post I did not state that this was MY opinion, I had merely been having a similar discussion with my OH, did a quick search of this subforum and noticed that it hadn't been debated so far.

I agree that the reason it is such a contentious issue with people is because so many are overweight. If this thread had been titled 'Is becoming pregnant while addicted to drugs/alcohol ethical' then there would have been a lot less people accusing me of being rude for merely starting a discussion.

 

[reedsgirl1138]

Thank you to whoever pointed out that in my original post I did not state that this was MY opinion, I had merely been having a similar discussion with my OH, did a quick search of this subforum and noticed that it hadn't been debated so far.

I agree that the reason it is such a contentious issue with people is because so many are overweight. If this thread had been titled 'Is becoming pregnant while addicted to drugs/alcohol ethical' then there would have been a lot less people accusing me of being rude for merely starting a discussion.

Not true...I believe that trying to judge anyone's ethic is rude. Mainly because who are we to judge. Does that make them right or wrong because we haven't walked a day in their shoes and have no idea what life is like for them. Yes I believe that its wrong to get pregnant while your a alcholic or a drug addict but sadly most of those people do not get pregnant on purpose and in my eyes as sad as it is God has brought that baby into this world for a reason and maybe its in hope that it will help that person. I may get critized for my beliefs but thats life. I judge no one and as I said before everyone's ethics are different and society is the way that it is because so many closed minded people are more often than not all about judging one person ethics rather than reaching out and trying to help.

 

[Laura2919]

Im sorry but I still think its worded wrong. It is this thats causing offence.

 

[Dopeyjopey]

Thank you to whoever pointed out that in my original post I did not state that this was MY opinion, I had merely been having a similar discussion with my OH, did a quick search of this subforum and noticed that it hadn't been debated so far.

I agree that the reason it is such a contentious issue with people is because so many are overweight. If this thread had been titled 'Is becoming pregnant while addicted to drugs/alcohol ethical' then there would have been a lot less people accusing me of being rude for merely starting a discussion.

Not true...I believe that trying to judge anyone's ethic is rude. Mainly because who are we to judge. Does that make them right or wrong because we haven't walked a day in their shoes and have no idea what life is like for them. Yes I believe that its wrong to get pregnant while your a alcholic or a drug addict but sadly most of those people do not get pregnant on purpose and in my eyes as sad as it is God has brought that baby into this world for a reason and maybe its in hope that it will help that person. I may get critized for my beliefs but thats life. I judge no one and as I said before everyone's ethics are different and society is the way that it is because so many closed minded people are more often than not all about judging one person ethics rather than reaching out and trying to help.

When I fell pregnant I was a drug taker. It sorted me out and i am not the same anymore. If someone had posed this question about drug takers i would not suggest that someone should TTC before they stopped the substances! Even if I was still getting mashed every weekend I wouldn't say it was a good idea for anyone else.

Weight has certainly got health issues in some cases, therefore it makes sense to attempt to get to a healthier weight before getting pregnant.

Regardless of how the OP is worded, i think it is clear what was actually meant. Picking it apart isn't moving the debate anywhere. I still think people are being rude referring to people as 'skinny' but there is no point in trying to get people to change it as it is unlikely to happen.

 

[Dopeyjopey]

My last point was not directed at your reedsgirl, just realise it looks like it is because i quoted you!

 

[reedsgirl1138]

That's ok Dopeyjpey I am glad that having a baby changed your life.

 

[andella95]

Thank you to whoever pointed out that in my original post I did not state that this was MY opinion, I had merely been having a similar discussion with my OH, did a quick search of this subforum and noticed that it hadn't been debated so far.

I agree that the reason it is such a contentious issue with people is because so many are overweight. If this thread had been titled 'Is becoming pregnant while addicted to drugs/alcohol ethical' then there would have been a lot less people accusing me of being rude for merely starting a discussion.

You can't compare becoming pregnant while obese to being addicted to drugs or alcohol, because the consequences are drastically different.

There seems to be an assumption (among a lot of people) that if an obese woman gets pregnant, she is going to have a huge baby with all sorts of complications such as pre-e and gd, etc, when the reality is that most obese women aren't going to have any problems. This is fact. Comparing obesity to alcohol and drug use is absurd.

I don't believe TTC while obese is unethical because (1) the actual risks are very low (2) any possible complications are relatively minor (3) if complications do occur, it cannot be proven that obesity was the cause, as many women of normal weight also suffer these same complications.

 

[Dopeyjopey]

Thank you to whoever pointed out that in my original post I did not state that this was MY opinion, I had merely been having a similar discussion with my OH, did a quick search of this subforum and noticed that it hadn't been debated so far.

I agree that the reason it is such a contentious issue with people is because so many are overweight. If this thread had been titled 'Is becoming pregnant awhile addicted to drugs/alcohol ethical' then there would have been a lot less people accusing me of being rude for merely starting a discussion.

You can't compare becoming pregnant while obese to being addicted to drugs or alcohol, because the consequences are drastically different.

There seems to be an assumption (among a lot of people) that if an obese woman gets pregnant, she is going to have a huge baby with all sorts of complications such as pre-e and gd, etc, when the reality is that most obese women aren't going to have any problems. This is fact. Comparing obesity to alcohol and drug use is absurd.

I don't believe TTC while obese is unethical because (1) the actual risks are very low (2) any possible complications are relatively minor (3) if complications do occur, it cannot be proven that obesity was the cause, as many women of normal weight also suffer these same complications.

But a lot of people who take drugs also have healthy pregnancies and babies. It doesn't mean there isn't a risk.

 

[reedsgirl1138]

Really I am just wondering when it became unethical to be overweight?? I mean really?

 

[Dopeyjopey]

I don't think unethical is the right word, the OP has already said she was trying to find a word that didn't offend. She has also explained that she didn't mean it like that.

 

[reedsgirl1138]

Really there is no way to word...obeses people shouldnt get pregnant that wouldn't offend. I do rememeber reading that now. Thank Dopey. I guess I just don't get the point of this debate...how a topic like this really be debated??

 

[Dopeyjopey]

I honestly think anyone is suggesting that obese people shouldn't get pregnant. It was just asking if obese people should try and lose weight before actively TTC. The same question could be asked about people who are under weight, smokers, drug takers, people who are addicted to sushi/pate/runny eggs. All of those things have risks to a pregnancy so it is a valid question.

For the record, when i fell pregnant i was underweight, smoked, took drugs, drank more than i should, went to gigs and crowd surfed regularly and had a terrible diet. Some of things i was able to stop, some i wasn't. But i wouldn't take offense to someone saying i should have stopped because i know all of those things are not condusive to a healthy pregnancy

 

[reedsgirl1138]

I honestly think anyone is suggesting that obese people shouldn't get pregnant. It was just asking if obese people should try and lose weight before actively TTC. The same question could be asked about people who are under weight, smokers, drug takers, people who are addicted to sushi/pate/runny eggs. All of those things have risks to a pregnancy so it is a valid question.

For the record, when i fell pregnant i was underweight, smoked, took drugs, drank more than i should, went to gigs and crowd surfed regularly and had a terrible diet. Some of things i was able to stop, some i wasn't. But i wouldn't take offense to someone saying i should have stopped because i know all of those things are not condusive to a healthy pregnancy

Point taken however, with most of those you chose to do them. With some obese people its not a choice I think that is something that is being missed here. I know my cousin didn't WANT to be obese she tried everything to lose weight and sadly in the end it cost her her life. Yes I also under stand that there are some people who are just are just too lazy to do anything about it but usually when it gets to that point they are unable to conceive anyway.

 

[Dopeyjopey]

I understand some people can't lose weight/gain weight (i know i have tried very hard in the past) and in those cases it can be more risky to keep trying than it would to get pregnant. It is the people who could lose weight that i think should try.

i'm so sorry about your cousin

 

[reedsgirl1138]

Thank you. But then again we also have to realise that some people are just happy with themselves just the way they are. And who are we to say what is the right weight to be to have a child again it all goes back to who are we to judge who does what?? What gave us that right??