Is it right to smack a child?

Not to be the one voice of dissent, but I would spank in extreme cases. The 10 year old that pulled a handgun on a woman making an innocent joke to one of his friends on Halloween who was released without charges would be spanked when I was calm and would be lucky to get privileges back by Halloween 2012. Had it been my 12 year old that pushed a shopping cart off a fourth story parking garage at target for fun and left a mother clinging to life and laughed about it at booking he would count himself lucky that he was in police custody. I don't think smacking a child's hand for minor offenses does any good, but endangering the lives of others would qualify a spanking in my mind.

The thing is...I bet that kid WAS spanked. Studies show children who are hit, are more aggresive. Research it!

I've taken child development classes and seen both sides of the argument and I get what you're saying. If someone does something you don't like it's alright to hit them if they're smaller can be a message that's sent if the spanking doesn't match the crime, but if my child is displaying sociopathic behavior a consequence that they fear would be what I would want them to associate with their behavior.
 
Definitely not right at all, whether it be a tap, smack, spank, what have you. I would NEVER get physical with someone I love, let alone the own flesh & blood I created :nope:
 
Not to be the one voice of dissent, but I would spank in extreme cases. The 10 year old that pulled a handgun on a woman making an innocent joke to one of his friends on Halloween who was released without charges would be spanked when I was calm and would be lucky to get privileges back by Halloween 2012. Had it been my 12 year old that pushed a shopping cart off a fourth story parking garage at target for fun and left a mother clinging to life and laughed about it at booking he would count himself lucky that he was in police custody. I don't think smacking a child's hand for minor offenses does any good, but endangering the lives of others would qualify a spanking in my mind.

The thing is...I bet that kid WAS spanked. Studies show children who are hit, are more aggresive. Research it!

I've taken child development classes and seen both sides of the argument and I get what you're saying. If someone does something you don't like it's alright to hit them if they're smaller can be a message that's sent if the spanking doesn't match the crime, but if my child is displaying sociopathic behavior a consequence that they fear would be what I would want them to associate with their behavior.
thats a very serious situation and I don't think a spanking would solve it. If a child shows a sociopathic behavior, they need professional help.
 
Not to be the one voice of dissent, but I would spank in extreme cases. The 10 year old that pulled a handgun on a woman making an innocent joke to one of his friends on Halloween who was released without charges would be spanked when I was calm and would be lucky to get privileges back by Halloween 2012. Had it been my 12 year old that pushed a shopping cart off a fourth story parking garage at target for fun and left a mother clinging to life and laughed about it at booking he would count himself lucky that he was in police custody. I don't think smacking a child's hand for minor offenses does any good, but endangering the lives of others would qualify a spanking in my mind.

The thing is...I bet that kid WAS spanked. Studies show children who are hit, are more aggresive. Research it!

I've taken child development classes and seen both sides of the argument and I get what you're saying. If someone does something you don't like it's alright to hit them if they're smaller can be a message that's sent if the spanking doesn't match the crime, but if my child is displaying sociopathic behavior a consequence that they fear would be what I would want them to associate with their behavior.
thats a very serious situation and I don't think a spanking would solve it. If a child shows a sociopathic behavior, they need professional help.
I dont believe there are exceptions to hitting someone either, if I done that I would be in court so no I wouldnt hit a child I would expect to be in trouble for doing that.
 
Not to be the one voice of dissent, but I would spank in extreme cases. The 10 year old that pulled a handgun on a woman making an innocent joke to one of his friends on Halloween who was released without charges would be spanked when I was calm and would be lucky to get privileges back by Halloween 2012. Had it been my 12 year old that pushed a shopping cart off a fourth story parking garage at target for fun and left a mother clinging to life and laughed about it at booking he would count himself lucky that he was in police custody. I don't think smacking a child's hand for minor offenses does any good, but endangering the lives of others would qualify a spanking in my mind.

The thing is...I bet that kid WAS spanked. Studies show children who are hit, are more aggresive. Research it!

I've taken child development classes and seen both sides of the argument and I get what you're saying. If someone does something you don't like it's alright to hit them if they're smaller can be a message that's sent if the spanking doesn't match the crime, but if my child is displaying sociopathic behavior a consequence that they fear would be what I would want them to associate with their behavior.

See, and I would want to get to the root of the problem...to help them understand, not show them...you do psycho stuff you are going to get hurt by the person who you are supposed to trust.
 
That's my opinion, though, and I'm not changing it. The most ill behaved classmates I ever had were those whose parents talked it out for every problem because they felt that taking away privileges was just as devastating as spanking and I know this because they would brag about how their parents didn't do anything but give them a little talk. As a child my punishment met my crime. I was only ever spanked if I hurt someone as a reminder by my parents that what I'd done didn't feel too nice to who I'd done it too. They didn't shout, "You don't hit people," when they spanked me they calmly said, "How you're feeling right now is how X felt when you did Y think about it," and I understood the reason for the consequence due to their explanation and apologized to whoever I'd hurt without being prodded to.
 
Sure, there is parents that don't discipline...but you are going the complete opposite and thinking you need to spank your child into submission...what about thinking for themselves and LEARNING to make positive choices because they know it's the right thing to do? My children have never been hit..and they are good kids. *I* was never hit, and I was a good kid, and now I am a responisble adult who has a loving family (with rules and positive discipline that works). My sister spanked her kids..and they all are in trouble at school and have discipline issues. I just watched that video of that dad in the USA whipping his disabled daughter...makes me sick. Those type of people aren't parents...they are MONSTERS. Karma is kicking his ass hard right now, and I don't feel sorry for him at all. Serves him right. His daughter doesn't love him. She doesn't trust him. I would never want that kind of relationship with my children. Respect is earned...not beaten into someone.
 
Discipline dosnt mean spanking there are other ways, even my dad says that. My parents never hit me and I was a good child, never needed to be hit or even grounded I just behaved. Same as my siblings. I dont get the argument "I was hit and I am fine" plenty where hit and turned out ok to so its needless. And do people know the effects of spanking long term anyway?
 
I agree with Blah (sorry dont know your name) on the whole 'I'm disappointed' thing. My Dad probably smacked me once but I became so fearful of it he never did it again. OH used to get hit with the belt buckle all the time, and IMO i think there are plenty of other ways to discipline that have a better effect.
 
First off there needs to be a clear differance between what you refer to as a smack, when I say smack im refering to on the back of the hand or bum (with trousers and garments on, not a bare bum) the problem is too many differant terms are used so a smack to one person could mean what I just discribed yet to another person it could bring up images of being whacked across the back of the head or face (im my mind thats a beating not a smack) and others may use it to refer to a hand across a bare bum or leg.

I was smacked on occasion by my parents (in the terms that I would use ie on the hand or clothed bum) and I dont in the slightest resent my parents for it in fact I couldnt be closer to my parents.
On one occasion my dad did slap me across the face when I was 16 and another my mum slapped me when I was 17 and I well and truely deserved both times but thats another story of a teenager going off the rails.

I have smacked Brian before but quickly learnt there was no point in useing that as a discapline because he just laughed at me.
Is it right to smack a child? probably not, is it needed sometimes? probably.

But again there is so many differant definitions of smack, slap, hit, spanked thats its hard to determin what someone means and where the line is drawn between smacking and beating.
 
Sure, there is parents that don't discipline...but you are going the complete opposite and thinking you need to spank your child into submission...what about thinking for themselves and LEARNING to make positive choices because they know it's the right thing to do? My children have never been hit..and they are good kids. *I* was never hit, and I was a good kid, and now I am a responisble adult who has a loving family (with rules and positive discipline that works). My sister spanked her kids..and they all are in trouble at school and have discipline issues. I just watched that video of that dad in the USA whipping his disabled daughter...makes me sick. Those type of people aren't parents...they are MONSTERS. Karma is kicking his ass hard right now, and I don't feel sorry for him at all. Serves him right. His daughter doesn't love him. She doesn't trust him. I would never want that kind of relationship with my children. Respect is earned...not beaten into someone.

I don't think you're reading my posts if you think I advocate beating a child into submission for ten minutes for downloading music or whatever innocent thing she was doing the news keeps changing it so I'm going to leave this thread. :shrug:
 
Sure, there is parents that don't discipline...but you are going the complete opposite and thinking you need to spank your child into submission...what about thinking for themselves and LEARNING to make positive choices because they know it's the right thing to do? My children have never been hit..and they are good kids. *I* was never hit, and I was a good kid, and now I am a responisble adult who has a loving family (with rules and positive discipline that works). My sister spanked her kids..and they all are in trouble at school and have discipline issues. I just watched that video of that dad in the USA whipping his disabled daughter...makes me sick. Those type of people aren't parents...they are MONSTERS. Karma is kicking his ass hard right now, and I don't feel sorry for him at all. Serves him right. His daughter doesn't love him. She doesn't trust him. I would never want that kind of relationship with my children. Respect is earned...not beaten into someone.

I don't think you're reading my posts if you think I advocate beating a child into submission for ten minutes for downloading music or whatever innocent thing she was doing the news keeps changing it so I'm going to leave this thread. :shrug:

Uh, I was talking about the guy on the video, but I do feel that smacking is crossing a line.
 
Nothing that girl could have done could ever justify her parents attacking her like that.
 
A couple of points I was thinking about. I know a few people say its only a smack or a tap. But what if a parent just suddenly loses control? There is such a fine line and I bet that people who have been convicted of child abuse most probably started off with a tap or a smack. My parents regularly used to 'tap' my wrist when I was naughty but one day when I was a teenager my mum completely lost control. And another point, what about when the child gets older, say for example a young teen. What would a tap or a smack teach them? Do you increase the amount of force you use? My parent certainly did. So imo smacking, slapping, spanking is not a good form of discipline
 
I do use smacking in a controlled manner for one very specific purpose-- to keep baby/toddler safe: When my baby or toddler is exploring, and goes to stick something in a light socket, or try to touch something hot, etc.. and it would INJURE them to follow through, I smack their hand (without anger in my face or voice) and say "Ouchie! No!" to teach them to associate pain with that dangerous action, before they end up having to suffer the actual damage from doing it if they don't stop. Once kids are old enough to reason, there's no point in that...but in that small stage where they're mobile, exploring, but not yet able to reason and understand your explanation of cause/effect, I would much rather my baby feels a smack on the hand than a severe burn or electric shock.

(before you say something like "Why aren't your electrical sockets protected?" or "Why is your baby close enough to a stove to be able to touch it?" Just remember that your babies/toddlers spend time in places other than your house. It only takes a second for a well-meaning grandparent to sit baby/toddler on the counter to taste frosting, or for you to be at a non-baby-proofed friend's house and have your baby get curious about light sockets. Things happen.)
 
^^I agree. We will spank, but will do so only when our daughter does something that puts herself or someone else in danger. Kids need to be taught the seriousness of situations, and in our (DH and I) opinions, that is the method we will use to teach in those circumstances. I'm not talking causing welts, but enough of a sting that she remembers it.
 
:nope: whatever happened to supervision and teaching???! Sad to hear people resort to hurting to teach...I just don't get it.:nope:
 
Just noticed that the three on this page for smacking are from the states...wonder if it is the way it is there...a society thing???
 
Spanking: It hurts more than you think

https://www.toronto.ca/health/children/discipline.htm#3

Reasons why NOT to spank:


Spanking is hitting, and hitting hurts physically, emotionally and socially.

Hitting people is wrong - and children are people, too.

Children who are spanked are more likely to be aggressive. This can lead to other problems, like bullying.

Spanking can result in fear, not respect. A child who fears a parent may learn to hide behaviour and lie rather than trust that parent to guide and teach.

Spanking may get a quick reaction, but next time you may end up hitting harder. And when you're angry and stressed, it's easy to injure your child.

Spanking doesn't teach the right lesson. It shows a child that hitting is a way to solve problems.
 
Really Jasmak... Are you going to make this another 'US' thing...? :roll:
 

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