is/was your LO a really bad sleeper? support and advise thread!

[MrsHedgehog]

We're having a terrible night so far. I decided to try putting LO in her cot. Usually I go to bed with her but tonight I really wanted to have an evening with DH to watch a movie so I nursed her to sleep and put her in her cot. We got all comfy and settled on the couch with a DVD on and some ice cream and LO woke after only 20mins. I sent DH in to try and settle her but she was screaming hysterically after about 2mins. I left them for about 5mins before going in and nursing LO back to sleep on the bed. I left DH in bed with her and came back to watch the movie alone. Another 20mins later and she was awake again I've just resettled her but think I'll give up on the movie and just get into bed with her before she wakes up again.

I just don't understand it. She sleeps perfectly in her cot for naps during the day for 1.5hours and sometimes even more. She even sometimes self settles if she wakes a bit early. Why should it be different at night? Maybe I need to put her to bed with the lights on? I really wish that DH was able to settle her so that I could get a break now and again. I too worry about what would happen if anything happened to me. LO relies on me so much at night time. Right now it feels like I'm never going to get a decent nights sleep again and that I'm going to have LO in bed with me forever. I feel like i've done it all wrong

 

[kosh]

mrs hedgehog as i said i too feel i've done something wrong and now it is too late to fix it

i have tickets for a gig at the end of october and i am already worried about it. DH says they'll be fine, but I really doubt it......

 

[Claireyb1]

How is everyone this morning?

We had one good night on Thursday with only 3 wake ups but then another rubbish night last night. I'm trying so hard to work out whether there's a pattern to this but I just can't come up with anything

Hope everyone had good nights last night

Same here. Every time he stays awake for hours in the middle of the night I spend the time trying to understand ...Is it something I am doing wrong? Is it something that makes him not able to fully relax?

I seem to be obsessed with a theme - apart from Angel who FF and shares duties with Mr Angel, ALL of us BF and our OH/DHs do nearly f**k all at night, am I right? Can this somehow related? I mean, maybe the fact that they rely on us so much at night?

Apologies if I am over analyzing it. Feeling down today

Hi Kosh, I know how you feel. Having my Mum in hospital has made me think about what the hell would happen if it was me in hospital??? how would my lo cope??? makes me nervous to even contemplate it!

I think this all the time! It really worries me! It also makes me realise the pressure/stress I feel every night

We've been having pretty rubbish nights and I just seem too tired in the night to try anything else other than pop a booby in her mouth (sends her back off pretty quick most times) I worry that she expects it now and nothing but the booby will do!

this is what I do too....
(do you co-sleep claire?)

Yes, we co-sleep Kosh. It has been the only way to get some sleep
("some" lol) too nervous to try and put her in the cot as I fear I would get zero sleep

 

[Claireyb1]

We're having a terrible night so far. I decided to try putting LO in her cot. Usually I go to bed with her but tonight I really wanted to have an evening with DH to watch a movie so I nursed her to sleep and put her in her cot. We got all comfy and settled on the couch with a DVD on and some ice cream and LO woke after only 20mins. I sent DH in to try and settle her but she was screaming hysterically after about 2mins. I left them for about 5mins before going in and nursing LO back to sleep on the bed. I left DH in bed with her and came back to watch the movie alone. Another 20mins later and she was awake again I've just resettled her but think I'll give up on the movie and just get into bed with her before she wakes up again.

I just don't understand it. She sleeps perfectly in her cot for naps during the day for 1.5hours and sometimes even more. She even sometimes self settles if she wakes a bit early. Why should it be different at night? Maybe I need to put her to bed with the lights on? I really wish that DH was able to settle her so that I could get a break now and again. I too worry about what would happen if anything happened to me. LO relies on me so much at night time. Right now it feels like I'm never going to get a decent nights sleep again and that I'm going to have LO in bed with me forever. I feel like i've done it all wrong

^^^ oh totally get you here! I get comments from oh about if only she would take a bottle or expressed milk etc etc. I feel I have made her too reliant on me and now I can't change it Did any of us ever imagine it would be this hard being a parent????

 

[chistiana]

Hey ladies. Same here, natalia wont take the bottle and if i m being honest here i too cant be bothered to do anything else other than bf her in the middle of the night to settle her down. She was christened yesterday so we re taking the godmother put for dinner tonight...i really dont know what will happen. I hope she ll be down for 3 hours as i kept her up for a good 3 hours before putting her down just now...and i want to try putting her in her cot (we co sleep now) in her room with her brother tomorrow but i m too afraid she ll be waking him up every hour...i think i ll let her sleep the first stretch (the longest one being 3 hours) in there n then take her in bed with me. Aaaarrhggg i need some sleep...sleepy dust to everyone

 

[lisa1980]

Bleurgh. That sums up last night.

Kosh - re the BF, do you think it has anything to do with the bad sleeping? I sometimes feel that it hasn't helped. It definitely isn't the reason for it as plenty of FF babies don't sleep either (plus he's mainly FF now and his sleep is no better), but in my case I think he became a 'snacker' which didn't help. It wouldn't stop me doing it next time but it would make me more prepared maybe...

 

[Claireyb1]

Bleurgh. That sums up last night.

Kosh - re the BF, do you think it has anything to do with the bad sleeping? I sometimes feel that it hasn't helped. It definitely isn't the reason for it as plenty of FF babies don't sleep either (plus he's mainly FF now and his sleep is no better), but in my case I think he became a 'snacker' which didn't help. It wouldn't stop me doing it next time but it would make me more prepared maybe...

Hi Lisa, I too do wonder about the BF'ing, but as you say there are plenty of FF babies that are rubbish sleepers so I just don't know??
My LO has always been a bit of a snacker too,so maybe this has something to do with it then? I guess we will never really know
Saying all of that,last night was the best night we have had in a longggggg time. She went down at 7pm and slept until 11.40pm and then I think she didn't wake up until 2.30am ish I think? and then I'm not sure if we had another wake up or not but she woke for the day at 6.40am. so all in all a great night for us!
Sorry for your Bleurgh night Lisa and I hope all the other ladies didn't have bad ones too.

 

[AngelUK]

Good morning ladies.
Sorry you had a bad night again lisa! Ours was ok actually. At least in regards to Dominic. He went to bed relatively easily at ca 7 and slept till about 10:30 without stirring which in itself is amazing! Then he needed replugging and repositioning once or twice and then slept till 12 when I fed him. He then woke again at 2:40 which is really too early for his next bottle so for the next 30 mins I tried resettling him but he started sobbing and so I gave him his bottle and then also fed Sebastian. Dom then slept without waking to 6:30 and only woke briefly then cause Seb was crying. In fact Seb got me up at 4:30, 5:30, 6:30 and 7. But I managed to resettle him with his dummy and muslin and they both then slept till 8! Can you believe it? 8!! So I feel quite ok even though I didn't get more than one good stretch of 2h30 of sleep.
What I do wonder about though is how on earth I am supposed to steer Dom towards getting only 3 bottles of milk along side his solids by 7 months. I mean he gets 6 now and while I guess we can maybe drop the 11am and 3pm ones and replace completely with meals, I doubt he will give up his midnight and 4ish am bottle

 

[AngelUK]

Claire how's your mum doing? Hope she is improving by leaps and bounds!

 

[Claireyb1]

Claire how's your mum doing? Hope she is improving by leaps and bounds!

Yes Angel,she is doing amazingly well and may even be home by Friday!!! how quickly has that turned around?! so happy to have my Mum back nearly to normal!!!

 

[lisa1980]

Yay Claire, I'm so happy for you! That's great news!

 

[MrsHedgehog]

LO slept in her cot lat night until 3am!!!!! (after going to bed at 11.30pm)

TBH I felt a bit lost in bed without her. I didn't really sleep that soundly until she woke and I brought her into bed with me. Then she woke again at 4am, again somewhere around 7am maybe then slept until 10am. Best night we've had in months.

Glad your mum is better Claire - that's an incredible recovery. You must be so relieved x x

 

[AngelUK]

Claire that is wonderful news! Hopefully she will be super healthy from now on!

 

[chistiana]

Great to hear you mum is really coming around claire!!!

Angel- why do you want to cut it out? I stopped giving nik hos bottles at night at 18 months or so and he was totally ready for it because he never gae me any grief about it. I think milk is great for them so unless it is something to do with his wakings i wouldnt bother cutting it out. Do you think he d wake up less if it wasnt for the bottle? The only difference i found with nik is that he ate a lot better when we stopped mid day milk!

Ladies it seems a lot of is have snakkers, huh? Maybe this is the thing with them and waking! Well last night was ok in that she only woke up at 12 just when we were walking in the house so yayayayyay we had a nice dinner out! The rest of the night was crappy!!! Tonight i put her in her cot in their room for the first time ever and she cried for 5-10 minutes but she s been down since 9 and hasnt woken even with her brother singing and shouting! So we ll see, wish us luck!

 

[AngelUK]

chistiana I thought that by 7 months I should only feed my boys 3 bottles a day? One being the first bottle upon waking in the morning and one before bedtime and I guess one at lunch. The rest of their nutrition is supposed to be from solids? Did I understand this wrong? We have a book by Annabel Karmel with recipes and meal plans etc. I only just got it and glanced at some of the schedules so maybe I misunderstood. But if this is so then this means no more bottles at night. And while I wouldn't mind if Dominic didn't want the feeds and slept instead I cannot see that happening any time soon lol.

MrsHedgehog aww she is growing up and I guess often us mummies aren't ready for it. But it does sounds like a good night! Let's hope she does it again xxx

 

[kosh]

Kosh - re the BF, do you think it has anything to do with the bad sleeping? I sometimes feel that it hasn't helped. It definitely isn't the reason for it as plenty of FF babies don't sleep either (plus he's mainly FF now and his sleep is no better), but in my case I think he became a 'snacker' which didn't help. It wouldn't stop me doing it next time but it would make me more prepared maybe...

I really don't know. I know that BF babies are supposed to wake up more but I still find it strange that at 8month my LO can't do more that 3hr without feeding? A week or so ago I thought he wasn't feeding much and was mainly comfort so I started to pay close attention - well, since then except maybe for feeds at around 5-6am I'd say that all the other ones are proper feeds. ie I would not be happy to refuse BF and give water as the HV suggested.
Don't know what's going on

 

[kosh]

chistiana I thought that by 7 months I should only feed my boys 3 bottles a day? One being the first bottle upon waking in the morning and one before bedtime and I guess one at lunch. The rest of their nutrition is supposed to be from solids? Did I understand this wrong? We have a book by Annabel Karmel with recipes and meal plans etc. I only just got it and glanced at some of the schedules so maybe I misunderstood. But if this is so then this means no more bottles at night. And while I wouldn't mind if Dominic didn't want the feeds and slept instead I cannot see that happening any time soon lol.

MrsHedgehog aww she is growing up and I guess often us mummies aren't ready for it. But it does sounds like a good night! Let's hope she does it again xxx

I actually heard the opposite - the 'food for fun before one'?
Since starting solids I think LO is BFing less (during the day,that is!) but I would not say that he dropped 3 feeds (=3 bottles)
tbh, I would just follow their lead, he'll tell you if he doesn't want/need those bottles (I believe)

 

[Claireyb1]

I have thought for a while that my lo doesn't get enough milk in the day? mainly due to everything distracting her and taking booby is just time she could be doing something else like crawling or standing!! I think she makes u for it at night,so for this reason I really don't want to stop her feeding if she needs it
I often wonder if this is the reason she isn't sttn, but what would I know??? lol

 

[Storm1jet2]

Clairey so glad to hear your mum is doing so well that is brilliant news!!!!!

Ladies my LO has been FF and has been a nightmare sleeper - that said I think since starting losec she is a bit better! Tonight we have started operation get her into her cot again, so not game enough to go straight to cot I had DH remove one side and now have it propped up against the bed so when she wakes for me I'm here but she is actually in her cot - I hope it works! I do worry about her in the bed now she is so mobile, I don't care if she is in the same room for years but I would like her in her own space - wish me luck!

 

[Claireyb1]

Clairey so glad to hear your mum is doing so well that is brilliant news!!!!!

Ladies my LO has been FF and has been a nightmare sleeper - that said I think since starting losec she is a bit better! Tonight we have started operation get her into her cot again, so not game enough to go straight to cot I had DH remove one side and now have it propped up against the bed so when she wakes for me I'm here but she is actually in her cot - I hope it works! I do worry about her in the bed now she is so mobile, I don't care if she is in the same room for years but I would like her in her own space - wish me luck!

I know Storm, it would be amazing if they let her home on Friday.....I do hope so!
Good luck with the cot sleeping! I wish I could take a side off our cot, but they are fixed sides and it's a cotbed so it's quite large
I know what you mean about having them in their own space, I sleep in the funniest positions with lo in the bed too