Itty Bitty Babies Club (Slow Gainers)

[emma77]

Thanks so much for the replies

florabean - since 7 weeks he had been following a curve just above the 2nd centile but last week (at 13 weeks) he was 10lbs 8oz so dropped below the 2nd centile. His birth weight was 8lbs 11oz which I'm sure was the 75th centile - although at 4 days old he lost 12% down to 7lbs 11oz.

I'll try dreamfeeding tonight and see how we get on with that.

I think I have mailed you before but don't worry - we have almost exactly the same situation. Birth weight of 8lb 12 oz, 14% weight loss, good sleeper, now gaining 1 1/2 oz per week. Otherwise she is happy, smiley and good tempered. We have tried formula top ups, expressed milk top ups, waking for feeding etc etc but nothing makes a difference - she is just small! I worry every now and then (otherwise wouldn't be here) but know underneath she is fine. My GP told me only to worry if she rapidly drops through a couple of centiles.

xx

 

[millycat]

Hi Everyone,

I am new and hoping some of you might be able to help. My baby boy is now 14 weeks, he weighed 6lb 9oz at birth, dropped to 5lb 10oz and yesterday he weighed 7lb 13oz, he is well below the 0.4th centile. The HV has said she just wants to get his weight up and is not concerned otherwise and wants me to give FF as last feed at night. This has really upset me as I want to exclusively breast feed.

Does anyone know what will happen if I decide not to do FF and don't get him weighed for a bit, I am stressed out about his weight as it is and clinic days which they expect me to do every 2 weeks make me worse, I cried in clinic yesterday and of course everyone was staring at me.

As he is not the best feeder I worry about my supply, I try to pump as often as I can, feed him every 2 hours, tried fenugreek (not much success), now on fennel tea. Have arranged GP appointment to discuss and also want to ask them if he could have a subtle tongue tie and also waitnig for a peer supporter to call, going to ask them to check latch etc.

Any advice would be very welcome. Thanks for reading.

 

[florabean1981]

Hi Everyone,

I am new and hoping some of you might be able to help. My baby boy is now 14 weeks, he weighed 6lb 9oz at birth, dropped to 5lb 10oz and yesterday he weighed 7lb 13oz, he is well below the 0.4th centile. The HV has said she just wants to get his weight up and is not concerned otherwise and wants me to give FF as last feed at night. This has really upset me as I want to exclusively breast feed.

Does anyone know what will happen if I decide not to do FF and don't get him weighed for a bit, I am stressed out about his weight as it is and clinic days which they expect me to do every 2 weeks make me worse, I cried in clinic yesterday and of course everyone was staring at me.

As he is not the best feeder I worry about my supply, I try to pump as often as I can, feed him every 2 hours, tried fenugreek (not much success), now on fennel tea. Have arranged GP appointment to discuss and also want to ask them if he could have a subtle tongue tie and also waitnig for a peer supporter to call, going to ask them to check latch etc.

Any advice would be very welcome. Thanks for reading.

Millycat & welcome to the group. Formula actually has less calories than breastmilk, so it's often conflicting when HVs advice to give a bottle before bed, but I think the main reason they tell us BFers to do this is so that you get a better gauge of how much your LO is ctaully eating/drinking. I tried this with my son between weeks 3&4 and again between weeks 7&8, and again back in jan when we moved house & I can honestly say it didn't help him gain any better than he had been before, nor did it help him sleep better What is did do was enable OH to feed him the bottle (about 4oz on average) while I pumped & I was able to build up enough of a stash of EBM in the freezer that he hasn't had to have a FF since feb

It sounds like you're doing the right thing by feeding every 2 hours (this is what I had to do too), getting a GP app, getting his latch checked etc. Does he sleep well at night? Does he have plenty of wet & regular dirty nappies? Is his soft spot ever sunken in (sign he's not getting enough)? Does he seem otherwise happy, healthy, alert & content when he has a feed? when you pump, are you saving it or do you give it as a top-up? Also, when you pump, do you notice whether you have much 'cream' when it separates, or is it mainly the watery foremilk kinda stuff? Does he ever have green poo or suffer from wind? (my son used to fill up with wind quite a lot rather than on BM, which I believe affected him weight gain & temperament for a while, but is doing just fine now). Have you ever had his length 7 head circumference measured? -as this is apparently more accurate at identifying growth issues than weight alone. Dveelopmentally, would you say he's doing ok for his age?

Sorry for all the questions!

 

[millycat]

Thanks Florabean,
I'll try to answer your questions, I really am grateful.
Sleep wise for 14 weeks I think we are o.k 7pm - 10.30/11ish then usually feed 2.30-3.30ish then up anywhere between 5-6.30.

No problems with the nappies.

I have never noticed a sunken soft spot - would this be obvious?

Happy, healthy and ready to either play or sleep after a feed.

Usually try to save expressed milk to give a 4oz feed to give me a rest (can take 2 days to get 4oz) Usually only a little creammy stuff.

No problems with wind and no green poo.

Keep asking to have length and head circumference done but they just seem to fob me off so I will refuse to leave the surgery tomorrow until they have done it.

Developmentally he seems fine, smiling, noticing hands, cooing, rolling onto side, grabbing at toys, not keen to lift head at tummy time but will hold head when i sit him up or if he is on my shoulder.

 

[florabean1981]

Everything sounds ok health-wise from what you've just written, but obviously I'm no doctor, lol. With regards to the sunken soft spot, if you run your hand over his head, you'll be able to feel the soft bit- if this is sunken in (it's kinda normal for it to sink a little bit due to gravity n stuff when they're upright, but laying down, it should be pretty flat) then it can be a sign of dehydration, as are sunken looking eyes, greyish skin tone, paleness, lack of alertness between feeds, sleeping too much, not hitting developmental milestones, general grumpiness etc... But he doesn't sound like he's got any of those issues, so on that note, it's a plus.

Obviously, some abbies are just naturally small. When you get him weighed, is he gaining every time, even if it's only small amounts, or does he gain some, lose some? As long as he is gaining something (even if it's only 1oz) HV are usually not overly worried but will keep an eye on him just to be sure.

Is he a sicky baby at all? Coz reflux can also hinder good weight gain too.

Google galactagogues (I may have spelled that wrong, so if so, sorry!) and these things can help increase supply. Putting him to your breast & having plenty of skin to skin time can help more so that extra pumping. Do you feed from one boob or both? I stopped swapping boobs in a feed & tried to keep himk just on one boob for as long as possible (till he got really fussy basically, before swapping, but mostly, i never needed to as he was content) so that he gets lots of the richer hindmilk rather than just skimming off the foremilk & just a small amount of the hindmilk from each breast, which can sometimes help too.

If you do go the FF route or end up doing combi-feeding, it's not a major deal. Some BFers are really anti FF, but at the end of the day, if it take some FF to get his weight up and that ends up being what works for you, then go for it; it's not gonna harm your baby & at the end of the day, we all only want what's best for our children!

Do you use a manual or electric pump? I started off using a manual & could only ever get about 2oz (both boobs combined) which was so frustrating & lead me to doubt my supply so much, but I finally invested in an electric pump (medela swing- got it brand new on ebay for £40!!!) & I can get 2-2.5oz now from each boob in about 20 mins, so I can pretty much get a full feed & only pump morning & before I go to bed now.

Really push for the length & head circ measurements, as those 2 measurements combined with the weight will give a much better overall picture... Soemtimes small babies get referred to a peadiatrician or dietician, and if this happens, try not to worry! If it happens, they will do everything they can to make sure he's happy & healthy & see if there are any underlying problems, or confirm that your son is just an ickle one, but is otherwise fine.

Hopefully someone else on here may have some other advice too

 

[millycat]

Thanks again Florabean. GP was good today, no concerns about his health and development other than he is a bit too skinny so she is going to refer us to Paeds, I also asked if she could ask for refferal to infant feeding co-ordinator. She checked head circ 0.4th centile but did not do length. She also did not do a physical check for tongue tie even though I raised this as a possible cause for slow gain. In the meantime I have managed to get appt with a lactation consultant tomorrow who will be able to tell if there are any issues with tongue tie or not.

I asked GP about domperidone and she was a bit taken aback as had not considered its use as a galactagogue before so has said she will look into it and let me know although I believe you can get it OTC.

He has been gaining for the past 10 weeks approx 4 -6oz every 2 weeks.

I use a medela swing also, still only get out about 1-oz per session, this often take 30-40mins unfortunatley.

My gut feeling and I could be wrong is that he is just little, fingers crossed I am right.

 

[Kota]

Hi girls, I completely forgot I'd started posting in here! Hope everyone is well!
Took Phoenix down for his last set of jabs earlier this week and was able to weigh him in the self weigh room (yay! no HV's to pressure me!) and he'd put on 4oz in 3wks, so is now weighing 12lb2oz, it does mean he's (yet again) dropped from the 2nd centile to somewhere between that and the 0.4%. Everything else is fine and people keep commenting on how long he is, which doesn't help as it only exaggerates how skinny he is. but otherwise he's healthy, happy and feeding/sleeping well.

 

[florabean1981]

millycat, it's great that you're being so proactive about this; it shows how committed you are to your son, and what great mummy you are for sure! I too hope your gut feeling si right & that he's just ickle

Kota, glad to hear your little Oopma Loompa (hehe) is doing well, despite the centile drop. And at least that's it now for jabs until he's one. Q, was it you who was going to be moving to Australia soon? Or have I confused you with someone else???!!!

 

[millycat]

Florabean, thanks for your kind comments. Been to the lactation consultant today, no tongue tie. She has given me some tips to get a more effective latch and I am going to try switch nursing for 24-48 hours to see if that helps. She thinks I will benefit from domperidone and I am hoping the GP will be sympathetic and prescibe but if not I'll get it OTC. I have just ordered a double pump (ouch!!) but hopefully that will benefit us. I also told her I had asked the GP about getting referred to the infant feeding co-ordinator and she is going to discuss our case with her and request that she be invited to our appointment with paediatics when we get it. I am crossing my fingers that by the time it arrives we will have managed to turn things around ourselves. I always thought I'd maybe breast feed for a year but with all the stress I think I will wait and hopefully when it becomes a more easy and enjoyable process I will consider feeding a bit longer if he wants to keep going. Thanks again, your advice has been very helpful.

 

[Jemma_x]

Millycat welcome, i have no advice about BF as connor has always been FF but i hope you will be reasurred at your pead appoinment, connor has been under a pead since he was born because he had IUGR so was only 4lb 8 at birth and has always been really slow gaining weight, he weighs 16lb 15 at a year but hes a very healthy, happy baby despite being very small, hes always been below the 0.4 centile and tbh i cant see him going up centiles but pead is not worried unless he stops gaining weight. Any gain is a good gain in consultants eyes, connor usually puts on about 5oz a month so not alot at all but at least its a gain

 

[millycat]

Thanks Jemma, I wish I'd found this forum sooner. Can I ask how much Connor weighed at 3 months?

 

[teal]

I hope everything is doing well

My LO has another weigh in on Tuesday. I always feel so nervous before them! Just as long as he's gained something. I've been dream feeding him and he's got the hang of it now. The first few nights he didn't seem too sure xx

 

[Eve]

I am so excited! We got our family pictures done again yesterday and I can't wait to see them! My kids are gorgeous

We also had a Big family shoot later that day with Mum, Dad, Brother, SIL, Grandparents, and us with the kids So glad we got them done!

 

[Jemma_x]

Millycat at 3 months connor weighed around 6lb 12.

 

[florabean1981]

Ladies I really, really need some back up right now. Please?

I am so upset it's unbelievable. I have had a falling out with my sister, which is annoying in itself, but now she has just bought Harry into the argument (which was about her spending her benefit money on her social life instead of looking after her kids & paying her bills, and getting back 3 hours late from going clubbing whle my mum babysat). What the hell has Harry got to do with that???

This is what she just text me:
""Oh and if I'm such a low life, time for some home truths. Ur son is a big squinny, he cant entertain himself for more than a couple of minutes, and every little noise he makes, you pick him up! U dont feed him anywhere near what he should have for his age. he IS too small, which is why the HVs want you to get him weighed every week & you know that & that's why you dont stay to speak to them. They will refer his sorry ass if he is still that small when he's one. Now fuck off."

How dare she???!!! Harry is NOT too small. He doesn't have to be weighed every week at all! (they want him weighed once a month till he was back on the 9th centile, which is is, so now they're happy to see him every 8 weeks & said he is developing perfectly!) He has 8 BFs & 2 meals, plus snacks throughout the day. He naps twice a day & sleeps a 12hr night, usually waking up for a BF at about 4am & that's it. He is developing fine for his age, is a very happy little chappy and everyone always comments on his big smile. Other than those first 5 days of his life, he has never LOST weight, and gained steadily ever since. Yes, he's not huge, yes he's not fat, but he still has skin folds & a double chin & chubby cheeks & is squishy, so it's not like he's srawny or a 'runt' as one of her friends on FB referred to him as. The only time he ever squinnies (as she put it) is when he's tired or hungry, or when one of her out of control sons has been nasty to him, like licking, poking, pulling, taking his toys away, pulling his hair, hitting him, landing on him etc etc, which is why I intervene & pick him up so he doesn't get hurt. Other than that, he's fine. I haven't heard him cry in months, he just makes a little whiney noise when he wakes up, or a loud grunting noise if he's kinda bored. That's it...

Am I biased because he's my son & therefore I dont see him as small? Is there something wrong with him? Should I force feed him more??? I dont know what to do. I have removed my sister from FB & blocked her number on my phone so she cant be nasty anymore directly to me, but i am sooo angry she bought Harry into our arguement & attacked the ONE thing I worry about with him, because she knew it would upset me. At least Harry isnt fat like Caleb (he's freaking HUGE for his age, even the Drs have said so) & I dont use food to shut my kids up like she does or bribe them with biscuits to get them to do something as simple as putting their shoes on! And at least my son will never be an emotional wreck like Josh is, who is so messed up that my sister was made to attend a 6 week positive parenting class to help her deal with him better & how he has to see the educational phychologist at school coz he keeps flashing people!

UGH!!!!!!!!! Sorry to vent, but I just really need someone to tell me Harry is ok. I'm going to get him weighed tomorrow before the baby play group we go to, just for my own piece of mind to prove he is doing just fine. Sorry, I'm just really upset..

 

[Eve]

Oh Flora! That is terrible! How dare your sister do that to you! Sounds like she needs to stop running her mouth and take care of her own kids! That is nuts! Going out and spending her money on parties and drinking is stupid and if you were trying to confront her and help her, she has no right to attck you or your child! I would love to have a few choice words with her too! Grrrrr Hope you feel better after having your LO weighed. I always do I am thinking Kayleigh is around 14lbs now which I don't think is too small for her age.

 

[Eve]

Sounds to me like Harry is just fine He seems content and is meeting all of his milestones I wouldn't worry hun, she is probably just jealous you are a good Mum and know what to do and her instincts are crap!

 

[WW1]

Oh Flora! You only have to look at your avatar picture to see what a gorgeous youngster you have there!

It sounds to me like your sister is trying to hurt you to cover her own insecurities. She can probably see her own failings when she looks at you and doesn't like it.

They are such hurtful comments - yet you know they are rubbish so try not to dwell.

Huge

 

[florabean1981]

thankyou ladies. It's so frustrating as I was actually defending her the other day about benefits & using them properly, then she starts all this crap... I have been threatened by her friends & they have put all kinds of nasty things about me, my husband & harry on facebook One of her friends said Harry was an ugly runt of a kid who was nothing compared to her two!!! From a girl who's never even met him.... I have come to realise that family aren't worth all of this time, effort & upset. I've removed her & all her friends from my facebook & blocked her number on my phone & dont plan on building any bridges with her any time soon... OInce again though, my mum & dad have fallen for her 'poor me, poor me' act, so they arent speaking to me at the moment either....
I just keep telling myself I have some great friends, a great husband & a son who I love to the ends of this world & that's all that matters.....

Thankyou. x

 

[cleckner04]

Hey girls! :wave: I haven't been in this thread in ages. I have to read back to catch up but real quick I wanted to say I just weighed Emma for the first time in months on the wii fit and she went from being off the charts for being so small to the 10th-25th percentile!! Woo! She now weighs a whopping 17.9 pounds! I knew only you girls would understand my excitement.

...Now to read back to see how you've all been.