I've got my anti-witch spray!

[wishnhoping]

OMG I missed a lot! I had a super busy weekend and didnt even have a chance to check in on my phone...so just catching up now

Leia- OMG OMG! I hope you are at the hospital having your baby! I wish you all the best for a healthy delivery and will most certainly be thinking of you...gosh I wish you were on FB so we could get updates! lol....big hugs my friend I cant wait to meet the latest member to our group

Giraffes- I heard of PUPPs durring my first pregnancy...I am so so sorry you got it! I can imagine how uncomfortable you are. Hopefully your little one cooperates and decides to grace us early! If hes ready of course!

Linz- I can not even name the million of ways that my sons changed my life. He just taught me so much...a love that I have never ever known even existed, patience, that I love being a mother. He says the sweetest things to me that fill my heart with such joy that I literally want to burst at the seams. Hes def an angel in my eyes in spite of his "spirited" ways I would not change one bit of him. This weekend alone hes melted my heart a million times over. I asked him B why doyou love me so much? he says "because Momma you're my girl!". Then last night I gave him his milk before bed and he said "Mommy you know you make the best milk ever?"...lol we all heat it up in the same cup for one minute..but since its me making it he loves it that much more. Motherhood is an experience that I think is un explainable and that unless you go through it yourself you just cant posibbly understand. I dont even think fathers get it to be honest.

Julie- I am worried about you please let us know whats going on and if you are going in for a scan. I hope its nothing and its jsut normal spotting. Please please check in when you can

 

[wishnhoping]

AFM- Im going through a really rought time. I dont know if I have mentioned it before but I was diagnosed as biploar when I was 13. When I first got pregnant with DS I was worried about how my depression would be because I havent been medicated for years and I was worried about getting depressed during pregnancy or post partum...I read up on it talked to family members about it. It was something that actually scared me because I have often read stories on the news about mothers killing their young children and were later found to be bipolar that just snapped...I was so so scared just from reading those stories. I alwasy thought omg could that happen to me. I took no risks and I really asked my family to be vigilant with me if they saw my mood change etc to take action. Luckily I had no issues with depression during that pregnany and in fact it lifted me to such happiness I was literally on cloud 9.

Now this pregnancy...I have been a little crazy. I have been blaming hormones because it wasnt that bad but last night I really lost it. I really jsut felt myself getting out of control and it scared me. I can tell my depression is coming back. My mood swings have been horrible, my temper has gotten worse, my bouts of crying...I am so scared and I dont know what to do. DH has really not been supportive and my parents who know the most about my depression are away in Europe for another 2 weeks, I could talk to my sister but shes a pyschologist and she uses her stupid terms on me and makes me go crazy. I feel so alone...You all know I want this baby more than anything and I know that me feeling this way is a pure chemical reaction going on but its breaking my heart that a pregnancy I wanted so badly is turning out like this

 

[wishnhoping]

oh and look...Im a lime that made me a little happy

 

[nats77]

Wishn what a difficult time for you, I don't know that I can say anything that will help but know that we are all here for you, I have no experience of bipolar but it must be very scary for you to be going thru. Wish I could give you some good advice, I hope you feel better soon x x x

 

[nats77]

Little any news?

Afm I'm getting a lot of pain today so I guess this will be the start of my miscarriage, typical as I've got my scan tomorrow! But I suppose it's better than going to It with false hopes.
Will let u know any change but I really think this is it now, the end of my dream

 

[wishnhoping]

hey Nats- how are you feeling? I hope the cramping was nothing....jsut wanted to let you know Im thinking of you

 

[wishnhoping]

ugh keep checking in for Julie...come on update!

 

[LittleSpy]

Everything is okay!! I'm completely shocked as I had myself totally convinced I was miscarrying after I started bleeding bright red starting last night and cramping this morning.

I'm so happy. The u/s tech found a small subchorionic hemorrhage which she thought may be the source of the bleeding. She said there's no blood behind the placenta or anything threatening to the baby. Baby is measuring spot on 9w4d and had a strong heartbeat - 173bpm. I'm supposed to take it easy. My OB said she doesn't feel as though this puts me at an increased risk for miscarriage. I'm so relieved.

The cyst is still there but they said it still isn't scary looking, just big. I saw her measure it this time and it's 11cm! As for my morning sickness disappearing, doc told me to be happy.

 

[LittleSpy]

Thinking of you, Nats.

My friend in the situation similar to you got a weird report at her last u/s. Baby had grown the exact appropriate amount between ultrasounds and was measuring 6+1 but there was still no heartbeat. She's still bleeding. She was due 9 days after me based on her lmp. And she got her bfp 4 days before her af was due. So, her being 3 weeks behind me is impossible based on her dates. For that to be possible it means she was getting bfps before the docs are saying the baby was conceived.

 

[wishnhoping]

Oh Julie thats great news! I was totally freaked out when you werent posting. I cant imagine how relieved you must be! ***HUG*** Glad everything is ok!

 

[LittleSpy]

Cris -- I'm sorry you're having a hard time. I struggle with severe depression at times so I'm, of course, terrified about having ppd again because it was so bad this time last year after having Maisie that I was suicidal. So although I could never say I know exactly what you're going through, I do struggle with something similar. PPD was very scary for me. I had the "typical" invasive fleeting thoughts of harming baby. They were super upsetting. I was taking the POP at the time and I think that really made it worse. I go nuts every time I take hormonal birth control. I think I may try a copper IUD after Maisie.

 

[nats77]

little im so happy! have been so worried for you! xx

 

[giraffes]

Leia - wow, good luck! Will be thinking of you lots

Little - fantastic news!

Nats - big hug and good luck tomorrow, will be keeping everything crossed for you

Wishin - big hugs, I have no advice on bipolar, but do you have someone you can talk to about it?

AFM - ctg was all fine but my doctor was busy and her junior had never seen a puppp case before so couldn't help. I now have to go in for extra monitoring on we'd, see my insult ant on thurs and a scan on fri.

 

[wishnhoping]

I wonder how Leia is getting along she prob has a baby by now!

 

[LittleSpy]

Oh, and just to update you guys about my "friend's" baby who had lost so much weight -- They're still in the hospital. He's gaining weight (you know... now that he's eating). He also had the same virus his dad and older brother had a couple of weeks go which was causing a high fever (which had his mother deluded into thinking his weight loss was somehow not directly her fault But today I saw her facebook status said something like "The weight loss treatment may be as simple as giving him more calories." No s***.). Anyway, looks like he's going to be okay. They're keeping him in the hospital until he gains more weight. So at least a couple more days. I know she was so worried and scared about what happened and I'd hate for anyone to feel like that. I just can't seem to get past the part where it's all her own fault.

 

[nats77]

Well ladies my dream is over, my scan showed no growth my baby has definitely grown wings I don't know how I'm feeling really I'm so so sad for the loss of my baby, but glad that the waiting is over! I am booked in for an erpc tomorrow morning,
I don't think I will be on for a little while, I just need some time to come to terms with this,
I'm not leaving you forever, just until I feel a bit better. Thank you all so much and I wish u all loads of luck, take care x x x

P.s Linz it's fine with me for u to update the front page, and wishn I'm ok with u adjusting me from ur bump buddy, just in case u didn't Want to ask x x c

 

[LittleSpy]

Oh Nats. I'm so sorry. Please know I'm here to listen if you want to talk.


My friend also got bad news late yesterday evening. Her doctor called her and told her she got the results of her bloodwork and with her hormone levels being so low, there was no way she had a viable pregnancy. She's having a D&C this morning.

 

[wishnhoping]

Nats- I am very very sorry for your loss, I hope and pray that you will find peace. Its just not fair...Ill be thinking of you my friend.

I had some more spotting...it will never be less scary no matter how many times people tell me that brown/pinkish is fine. I am also still losing weight which is starting to worry me now. I will be calling the Doctor today.

 

[LittleSpy]

Ugh, Cris. I'm sorry. Mine has been mostly brown now for the last 18 hours or so. That bright red stuff was totally freaking me out.

We just have to remember the chances of miscarriage this far along in pregnancy are REALLY low considering everything has been good and we've seen heartbeats and babies have measured correctly and all that. Even with bleeding/spotting most women go on to have healthy pregnancies and carry to term and have healthy babies. Especially since we've both had health pregnancies before.

U/s tech said my little hemmorhage was probably due to baby getting good and snug. Essentially implantation bleeding like someone said earlier. Also, my doctor told me yesterday that I wouldn't miscarry at this point without significant cramping.

I'm not going to tell you not to worry because I know first hand that's impossible. But the odds really and truly are in our favor. Big time. Just call your doctor and get the earliest urgent-appointment time possible. My doctor squeezed me in 40 minutes after I called yesterday! I was there for 2 hours, but it was very well worth the wait.

 

[giraffes]

Nats - so so so sorry. We will be here whenever you need us and till then take care of yourself and your family.