IVF for a sibling?

[tulip girl]

Thinking of jumping back on the roller coaster here too. My daughter is 20m following our first ivf (no frosties) I'm 39 so feel it's now or never really. We do have a grown up son too, but I really want my little girl to have a sibling close in age.

It's such a hard decision to make though! I found the whole process ok the first time around, but we obviously had an amazing result at the end of it! I feel like a couple of you do....did I use all my luck up on the first attempt?! Do I want the heartache of a failed cycle? Or will I regret not trying more than a failed cycle? Also, the cost has got to play an issue...it's a lot of money if there's nothing at the end if it...but if it works...totally priceless!

I'm going to phone up my clinic to make an appointment for an initial consultation at least....(I think!)

 

[s08]

I'd love to join you ladies! I've been away from the forum for a long time, but am ready to jump back in. It sounds like I have a lot in common with many of you (and even recognize some of you from years ago). We were also naively hopeful that I would conceive naturally after our son was born in March 2013. Since we are unexplained, we thought there was a chance we’d get lucky. No such luck.

So, here we are starting a fresh cycle since we have no frosties. We are doing a “freeze-all” cycle since we had success on a single, natural FET with a so-so embryo after the fresh transfer of two embryos with better grades ended in a chemical. My RE thought maybe my body handled the FET better. I started my first BCP last night and will begin Lupron in a couple weeks. I’m so nervous that it won’t work and we will have spent all this money for nothing (no insurance coverage). As said above, it’ll be so worth it if it works, but what if it doesn’t?

Like many of you, I think having a sibling for our little guy would be amazing. I will say though that at least for me, the pain of the repeated failed months was so much less severe the second time around since we have our beautiful son. Did anyone else experience this?

Looking forward to connecting with you all on our journeys for siblings!

 

[s08]

Springy, I had no idea about your recent loss. Such devastating news. I'm so sorry. What is your plan going forward?

 

[never2late70]

I am so happy to have found this thread! Hi Mo!!

So I had a DE fresh cycle transfer on June 24,2013 (After several failed IUI's and 2 failed OE IVF's) which resulted in my beautiful 10 month old son Logan on March 6,2014. I have 3 frosties left and have also begun the protocol for FET to be done on Jan 30th.

The decision for my husband and I to try FET wasn't easy, only because I am 44, I/we really feel as older parents (dh 41)though,
that Logan needs a sibling. We are both in good shape and pretty healthy. I just look at him and see how much he loves life already and just would love for him to have a siblling to share life with.

I look forward to following your stories.

~Angie

 

[WhiteOrchid24]

Hello ladies,

I hope it's ok for me to join this thread?! My DS just turned 5 and was conceived naturally with no problems. We have been TTC #2 for 3 years now and discovered after about 16 months of trying that DH has a very low count, motility and morph issues. Needless to say it looks like we will be going for IVF with ICSI and have our first appointment with the Fertility Specialist next week.

I'm excited to finally get things going since it has been 3 long years of trying but also super nervous and scared about the prospect of IVF. I was so sick with my first pregnancy and just wonder how I will cope with all of the extra hormones etc. That being said I so desperately want another child so that my DS has a sibling as well.

Anyway like I said I hope it's ok to join as could definitely do with some advice and encouraging stories!

 

[never2late70]

Hooray WhiteOrchid!

 

[Jillie89]

We have our FET plan all ready to go. Our clinic sent it out this week to us after I rang them. All going to plan we will have a transfer 9th/10th March!

I had to go in to our clinic the other day to pay our embryo and semen storage fees for the latest 6 months. Was actually nice to go back in there and not be in tears for once. One of the nurses who had been through all our rounds with us held our little girl and took her for a walk to see some other staff out the back. The embryologist even came out to say hello to me. I laughed when he said 'Amali looks a lot different to when I was babysitting her!'

I am nervous about doing another transfer (I am petrified of the heartbreak that goes with any failed round), but I really want to give our little girl a sibling sooner rather than later if we can. Hard not to get hopes up... damn IVF roller coaster ride!

 

[stacergirl]

Hi ladies! My first ivf baby is 11 months old and I'm currently in the tww of another ivf cycle trying to get him a sibling! So it's never too early to try again, esp when you know how long it took and what you went through to get your first baby! It was much more difficult this time doing ivf while having a child with the medications and numerous appointments, but we made it work. Dh didn't been show up to the ET bc he had to work and I had my mom watch my son! Good luck ladies with your new cycles, I'll pray for you! My OTD is this Friday so say a little prayer for me, we won't be trying ivf again after this. I only get 6 eggs each time, put 2 back in each time with none to freeze! I have very low amh and endometriosis.

 

[stacergirl]

We have our FET plan all ready to go. Our clinic sent it out this week to us after I rang them. All going to plan we will have a transfer 9th/10th March!

I had to go in to our clinic the other day to pay our embryo and semen storage fees for the latest 6 months. Was actually nice to go back in there and not be in tears for once. One of the nurses who had been through all our rounds with us held our little girl and took her for a walk to see some other staff out the back. The embryologist even came out to say hello to me. I laughed when he said 'Amali looks a lot different to when I was babysitting her!'

I am nervous about doing another transfer (I am petrified of the heartbreak that goes with any failed round), but I really want to give our little girl a sibling sooner rather than later if we can. Hard not to get hopes up... damn IVF roller coaster ride!

That is adorable what the embryologist said!!!

 

[Jillie89]

Hoping and praying for your BFP Stacergirl!

I thought what the embryologist said was pretty adorable too. I really like him. On our 3rd transfer when he brought out our embryo for transfer (the one now grunting and crawling around on the floor), he saw I was crying... again (I cried at every transfer). He lent over and gave me a big hug and said, 'I hate seeing you cry Jill.' I told him that I really liked him, but didn't want to see him for a while, I just wanted to be pregnant already. He laughed and said, 'I agree!' Very lucky to have a great team we work with.

 

[BethK]

Hi everyone! Can i join you?

We've just started our stimulation injections for our 1st fresh ICSI cycle since our DD was born nearly 5 years ago.

We had 1 FET last year but it was a bfn. I had an endometrial scratch a couple of weeks ago and we started stims on Friday, this Friday we'll be going in for our first scan to see how they're growing, fingers crossed they're ok and we can get them out next week.

xx

 

[pcsoph2890]

Hi laides, my miracle daughter (ICSI) is one on 5th feb, and by extreme luck i got oregnant on the first NHS try.
Now i could've quite happily cracked on a week after she was born with #2 but probably the best we actually waited.
We have 3 frozen waiting for us, so we have our appt on the 23rd feb to discuss everything.
The thing i am most worried about (apart from the whole emotional rollercoaster that is IVF) is my clinic advise defrosting 2 eggs at a time in case one doesn;t make it - what happens if both get defrosted. I cannot not do anything with that "spare" egg as it would be like throwing away a potential child. But the thought of twins in all honestly scares the hell out of me both financially and physically. My daughter has been the most perfect daughter, brill sleeper (bar a bit of colic early on and when teething/crawling) having two babies as well as her??? I'm really not sure i could do it - but i couldn't not use the eggs if both survived the thawing process??

Also i'll be 40 end of april when the stats really reduce - so i want to get cracking as soon as possible, i really want children close in age so it is all done and dusted in one go, then i can "get rid" of all the baby stuff and all the stuff in the lost i have hoarded for the next potential baby.

Just even arranging the appt has made me remember all the emotions to do with everything and i must admit it is hard doing it again...

 

[tulip girl]

How's everyone doing on here? I've made my review consultation for next month, so hopefully we'll find out where we stand and go from there. I'm completely shitting myself if I'm honest, all the old feelings are bubbling back.

Good luck to everyone xxx

 

[pcsoph2890]

tulip girl - totally with you there. I'm having my coil removed next friday - so then offically we'll be TTC again.
Our appt on Monday to see what the actual procedure is they'll recommend with our frozen embies.... then hopefully get cracking again as soon as i get all the blood tests done (which have top be dione before treatment starts)
It's been nice for 2 years to have a break from it - but yes all the old fears/worries/concerns etc are bubbling away in my mind again about going through it.
One hand i'm thinking we were too lucky catching 1st time last time, and having a wonderful daughter from it - when so many people it just doesn't work with. I think we possibly can't be that lucky again. So mentally preparing myself for it not working and even though i know i'll be upset, if my daughter is meant to be an only child then that's how it is meant to be...
I'm looking forward to sepaking with the dr on monday to see where we go with it and the odds of it working this time...

 

[Jillie89]

Currently on our down reg FET cycle. Had blood test to check my E2 levels and all good. Start progynova on the weekend and lining scan on 4th March. Getting closer now!

 

[tulip girl]

pcsoph - I also worry that we were too lucky last time and I'm already thinking it's not going to work this time. I guess as we have our daughter already though, there won't be as much heartache if it failed?...maybe?!

I'm 40 too in April, so while I want to get cracking, I'm also a teacher and I cycled during the Summer holidays last time, which was so less stressful for me. Anyway, I guess I'll find out what they think soon enough! Not looking forward to all the internal scans etc again though

Good luck Jillie! Keep us posted! X

 

[aleja]

Hi ladies may I join you? I recognise some names from ttc #1 and I hope we all get lucky again.

I have a 19 month old DS born after 1 ISCI & 3 FET cycles. Now Ttc #2 and I'm back on the roller coaster.
We had a Fresh cycle in Nov last year which was a flop. Hardly any eggs fertilised and I was lucky enough to make it to transfer no frosties but bfn. Now we are due to start again in March.
Like what some of you have said--I'm so grateful for my lovely son but I don't want him to be alone

Unfortunately pregnancy did not cure our infertility so here we are. I'm 37 now so now I'm contending with age factor as well as male issues. I can only try and hope for the best.

 

[pcsoph2890]

it was male part on my side too - i'm having my coil removed this week, so then really offically back on the TTC - so will see what happens - but it took two years of nothig to get going with the ICSI, so not expecting anything whatsoever - which in a way probably takes the pressure off reading the monthly signs etc.

But i'm 40 in april and i know the odds are really against me now... so being realistic and at the same time optomistic that it could work again!!

 

[ZXY]

Hi,

It's hard, isn't it? I'm just about to go through all of this again, too... my girl is 2 years old now, and it took 4 years to have her, 2 IVF treatments and 8 donor sperm IUIs. I haven't actually added all of the cost up, but I know we definitely have more money now, with a baby, than we did trying to make one.

My partner and I have had some disagreements over it too, we both want another child but frustrations get in the way, we're both just scared we'll try and it won't happen, and should we spend that money instead on our existing child?

It's a hard decision, but in the end, we decided we needed to at least try. We're thinking of going back to the same clinic (abroad, in Greece) that we did last time for IVF, with donor sperm from the same donor, too.

Good luck, and all the best!

x

 

[aleja]

Hi ZXY my DH is also a bit ambivalent about having another..thinks it's stressful enough having 1! I wish I had a few years to ponder (if I was younger) but it feels like we gotta get moving along due to age.
I also wonder about the kind of lifestyle we could give DS if he was an only child compared to having 2 but I think all these thoughts are because I have to mentally prepare in case baby no 2 doesn't happen