January Baby Bears 2017 ~ 48 Momma Bears: 21 Blue, 17 Pink

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I think it is totally personal choice where and how you and your babies sleep. I know there is no way we could cosleep, but I will have a crib in our room within easy reach of the bed (big room!). I would dearly love my lo to sleep independently as soon as possible with the aim of sleeping well at night. As a first time mum, I'm skeptical of how to actually do that but I'm reading actually lot. A friend got me a copy of a book called Baby Wise that makes a lot of logical sense to me on first read, but I want to read it several more times before baby comes along and work out the best schedules for me.

I'm hoping to breastfeed, so hoping my body will cooperate with that and lo works out how to do latch on well early.
 
For everyone talking about being emotional - I'm there! I've been crying over characters in TV shows and while I do get attached and sometimes a little choked up over big things like a death or something I've never sat and outwardly just cried over some minor aspects of the story line. I'll be interested to see how well this works with students returning on Tuesday. This could be a very interesting school year for me.


I'm loving reading all the different ways people sleep with their newborns, and how there is no judgement in our group. :) <3 This is such a tricky subject and so many mothers feel like they're being scolded for the choice they make.

As for us, we have a crib in the baby's room and we'll use it probably during the day because it's easier to access than our room, but for the first several months at least we are keeping her in our room at night. We only have a Queen size bed and while I could co-sleep I really wanted a "Co-sleeper", the kind that sit on the side of the bed and I can lower one side so she's at my level but in her own section. Unfortunately those are hard to find in the U.S. and even harder to find one that will work with the bed we have. I think we have decided to try this "Halo Bassinet Swivel Sleeper". It's not exactly what I wanted but it will work for what we want. It's a little more spendy than I wanted, But everything else we've got has been free or used and very cheap so this will be one of the few things we actually buy new.
 
Yes I always think go with flow as every baby is SO different I couldnt possibly say what works. With baby 3 she had to follow OUR existing routine as I had 2 school age. I was detirmined BUT she didnt work with it. I relaxed a bit and we were all happy...then I relaxed a lot and I can tell you it was the best thing I did. I dont stress if she sleeps in car, naps late etc I just go day by day. The good thing about co sleeping is she will sleep easily when we stay out hotels or bnbs. My big 2 used to struggle being away from home and routine.

What have you ladies done this weekend?
 
Actually swear I just felt her while I was standing, she's moving quite a bit right now maybe because I'm hungry.

We had to buy a new dishwasher today as our old one decided to break, and then later on after dinner will probably clean out the closet of the room that will be the baby's. In late November/early December I'll have my brother and dad and dh move out the furniture in that room to make room for her furniture.
Dh has to work tomorrow even though it's Labor Day and most people I know are off, kind of annoying. Hope you've all had a relaxing weekend!
 
I have to work tomorrow, but I don't get holiday pay because I'm PRN. It's quite annoying. Only good thing is I won't get orders back from doctors. Although, I'll get all of the weekends and Monday's orders on Tuesday. Fun stuff!
 
I have had a nice weekend my mum has been over visiting. She goes home this morning, we don't usually get on too great after a few days but I'll be quite sad to see her go today, she won't be back over now until when baby is due.

Baby is super active at the min she was non stop all day yesterday til gone midnight and she's just started again now at 8am.. bless her lol!

Kids back to school today so be glad to get back into a normal routine!
 
vrogers- i dont normally feel a definite pattern yet either, but feel him more after eating or drinking something. I notice less during the day, but thats cause im working and normally out and about.

Angel5000- i know, i love how everyone is non-judgemental here and we can all be open.

Midnight fairy- had a quiet weekend, saturday i just felt so emotional and didn't do anythig. yesterday dh and i went into town and looked at baby things. I felt exhausted from all the walking about, i slept loads last night. we both put a movie on to watch and i was asleep within 10 seconds of it.
 
I dont notice a pattern either...but I wer about 5 times a night currently &#128547;
 
I find the evenings and after eating is when I feel her the most. Sometimes other times too, she's been pretty active the last week or so!
 
newbie2013 said:
I think it is totally personal choice where and how you and your babies sleep. I know there is no way we could cosleep, but I will have a crib in our room within easy reach of the bed (big room!). I would dearly love my lo to sleep independently as soon as possible with the aim of sleeping well at night. As a first time mum, I'm skeptical of how to actually do that but I'm reading actually lot. A friend got me a copy of a book called Baby Wise that makes a lot of logical sense to me on first read, but I want to read it several more times before baby comes along and work out the best schedules for me.

I'm hoping to breastfeed, so hoping my body will cooperate with that and lo works out how to do latch on well early.
Click to expand...

Coming from someone who really struggled with a bad sleeper in my first baby...The best advice I can give is to accept that your baby is an individual and may not follow what books say they can/should do. There is no one-size-fits-all approach to babies and how they eat and sleep. The only thing I regret from DD's first year of life is obsessing over her sleep. It was a waste of time and emotion. Some babies are amazing sleepers who are fine being alone (maybe you will be lucky and have one!) but some are terrible and need constant comfort. It is very hard to change their natural inclination and it has very little to do with your own actions. And you can't spoil a baby with too much holding or too many breastfeeds. :)

Also, I've never read Baby Wise, but I hope you have an updated edition of it. I believe the first edition was extremely rigid and was linked to low milk supply in mothers and failure to thrive in babies. Some babies are amenable to schedules. Some are not.
 
slammerkin said:
newbie2013 said:
I think it is totally personal choice where and how you and your babies sleep. I know there is no way we could cosleep, but I will have a crib in our room within easy reach of the bed (big room!). I would dearly love my lo to sleep independently as soon as possible with the aim of sleeping well at night. As a first time mum, I'm skeptical of how to actually do that but I'm reading actually lot. A friend got me a copy of a book called Baby Wise that makes a lot of logical sense to me on first read, but I want to read it several more times before baby comes along and work out the best schedules for me.

I'm hoping to breastfeed, so hoping my body will cooperate with that and lo works out how to do latch on well early.
Click to expand...

Coming from someone who really struggled with a bad sleeper in my first baby...The best advice I can give is to accept that your baby is an individual and may not follow what books say they can/should do. There is no one-size-fits-all approach to babies and how they eat and sleep. The only thing I regret from DD's first year of life is obsessing over her sleep. It was a waste of time and emotion. Some babies are amazing sleepers who are fine being alone (maybe you will be lucky and have one!) but some are terrible and need constant comfort. It is very hard to change their natural inclination and it has very little to do with your own actions. And you can't spoil a baby with too much holding or too many breastfeeds. :)
Click to expand...

Thank you for saying this, I need to remember this!! I can see myself obsessing over her sleep schedule (and pretty much everything else) instead of remembering that all babies are different and I would rather do what works for her and is best for her than try to go by the books.
 
Yes....I had so much stress over sleep. I adopted the one day at a time motto and stopped giving a damn about bad habits...and I was so much happier.

So hungry lately xx
 
Midnight - I was the same! I wasted SO much time obsessing over sleep and trying to make it better and drove myself crazy! It was finally when I just accepted how my dd was and just went with what she needed that I could finally relax and actually enjoy life again. I will NOT be wasting my time on that this time!
 
Thanks for the advice. That's actually one of the things I like about the book Is that the continually emphasise flexibility and adjusting needs to suit an individual baby rather than prescribing specifics (like the old school 4 hour formula feeding that my mum followed strictly with me - because that's what the book said). Always need to remember that the baby has not read the baby books. All I can do is try my best for my kid and see what happens! Good thing I've calmed down my need for control and order over the year - if I had had this baby when I was 15 years younger, my control-freak nature would have had a meltdown more often than any baby has ever had - haha. I'm way better now and go with the flow much more readily.
 
I just do whatever makes life easier. I used to stress about doing it 'right' but now I take a much more natural approach and follow what baby wants. I'm a fairly laid back person so not one to worry about doing things the way I'm told I should do.. not one of my children have been the same so it would be impossible to treat each one exactly the same. I'm very pro co sleeping but my youngest did til about 5 months and just didn't like it.. he's slept independently since then and still now at 3 doesn't have a settled night unless he's in bed alone. Yet my daughter co slept til 4 and at nearly 6 has only just stopped coming into my bed in the night/early morning. What I do know is no matter how they have been early on they all eventually learn to sleep independently when they are ready.

I've had a very busy day today I'm so tired and definitely ready for bed tonight!
 
I stressed abut sleep too with DD! When I let go it was much easier. She naturally fell in to a routine around 5-6 months.

Looking back, when you're in those sleep deprived days it is really tough but it's such a short period of your life. They grow up SO fast!
 
I feel like it's too early for a bad night of sleeping. I feel huge already and my stomach feels so heavy.
 
Oh I should add that ever since then DD has been an amazing sleeper! So she just did it in her own time. She just wasn't ready for a routine before then.
 
Midnight - I've actually been opposite and not very hungry. I do get really hungry if I go hours without really eating. As in I down a glass a milk and have a few small things to eat in the morning to maybe having a snack at lunch then I'm finally hungry come supper time. It's so weird for me. I'm use to being hungry all the time and my emotions turned to hunger a lot before pregnancy. I say this, but my appetite will probably come back full force and worse soon.

I guess I never stressed too much about DS's sleeping pattern. We don't have a set nap time or anything. We kind of have a routine and he eats about the same time every day. Generally he has a stable routine, but if he changes it up like he has been recently (late naps and up till 12:30 and 12 the last two nights) I don't freak out. One I didn't have to stay up with him and two I know it'll go back because he's done this before. When he was an infant I had no energy to stress or the time, so we did what worked best!

I'm exhausted today and tomorrow is bound to be a stressful day. I'm dreading it and really feel like I'll be over 2 hours easily. Really hope not!
 
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