January Baby Bears 2017 ~ 48 Momma Bears: 21 Blue, 17 Pink

[slammerkin]

Angel - I haven't actually put Jack down for many naps yet - he usually gets held. But I think it's super normal for babies to not sleep long if put down. (Frustrating as hell, but normal). DD wouldn't sleep for more than 30-45 mins if you put her down. She finally started taking longer naps at 6 months and it was a huge breakthrough.

It's totally not silly to be nervous about sex! I hope it goes well for you when you do try. I'm scared it's going to be a really long recovery for me, like it was with DD. Can't even imagine being ready for sex in another two weeks, but many women are by that time.

Regarding birth control, I used a diaphragm after DD. It can be hard to find someone to fit you for one, and hard to obtain, but I was very happy with it. I didn't trust anything hormonal while BF, too scared of an IUD, and we don't like condoms.

Literati - oh man, sorry DH had yet another migraine. I would really be losing my patience if I were you.

Vrogers - glad to hear everything is healing well. I feel like I'm so close to bleeding stopping, but not quite there yet. Apprehensive about my own 6 week appt because I don't feel healed yet. I still have some tenderness. It takes time I guess.

Not sure about first PP period if you're formula feeding. Mine came back at 8 months with DD.

Midnight - another great sleep for you! I'm sure Violet was ready to eat when she woke!

Apple - sorry you were feeling off, but hope it's getting better and that Ollie’s fussiness keeps easing.

AliJo - I was so excited about having our own washer and dryer when we bought our house. I didn't have to go as far as a laundromat before, but did have to haul to the next apartment building over and pay for each load. I did laundry the same day we moved in!

Sorry T is struggling to nap. I definitely couldn't live without our white noise machines for DD. I know you said O will try to get in his room if T were put in there, but is there no way to keep him away? A baby gate in the hall or something?

Man I had forgotten how much pooping/not pooping affects baby sleep. So annoying! Jack won't fall asleep if he needs to poop, but it can be hard to know that's the issue in the moment.

I need to pump some more to build my stash. I started doing one breast in the mornings this week, but forgot to today.

AFM - so the last two nights I ended up spending time in the rocker/recliner I got for when DD was born. I actually hardly used it with her - kind of didn't like it after all. So I was in it last night getting pissed at 4-5 am about how it is too overstuffed and pushes my head forward, plus is hard to make stay reclined all the way because I don't weigh enough. So today we went to Buy Buy Baby and bought a Dutailier glider/recliner. I was in love when I tried the display model in the store, but now that I have it set up at home I'm kind of blah about it. Ugggghhhhhh. I'm so hard to please. It was expensive. Gonna feel really stupid if I end up using the old chair anyway.

Not much to report other than that. We're gonna go to the zoo tomorrow. Hope that goes OK.

 

[vrogers]

Ali- I'm glad to hear a positive side, I've read so many horror stories about periods after baby, I'm prepared.

Apple- I'm sorry about the colic, poor things! We've had our fair share of arguments. You're not alone! Glad to hear you're doing well otherwise

Angel- not silly at all to be nervous, I think anyone who's had a baby can understand!
I didn't want to use anything hormonal so we are going to do what we did before getting pregnant, basically just POM! I felt silly explaining that to the nurse, but my doc seems to think it's okay. I'm also thinking about using OPKs like I did when ttc, except this time to avoid.
I know the feeling of not knowing how long baby will nap! Like..do I have time to pee/eat/sit down before she wakes up? Dh says it's like a land mine sometimes haha

 

[vrogers]

Slammer- oops, was typing when you posted. I've been wanting a glider so bad, the couch can get quite uncomfortable and it would be nice to be able to go to the nursery (right across from our bedroom) rather than to the other side of the house for night feedings.
I hope you do end up liking the new glider, but hopefully it can be returned if you change your mind!
Zoo sounds like a nice time, I hope you enjoy!

 

[Literati_Love]

VRogers - I am glad your 6 week check-up went well! Yay for healing properly and whatnot. I didn't get my period back for 17 months, but I was BFing the whole time.

Ali - I don't really blame him for refusing condoms as they are awful, but I guess I am too picky so that it is what we are left with! I hope the mini pill works out ok for you so you don't have to resort to them.

I had a friend whose IUD got lost in her as well and she needed a minor surgery to get it removed. They weren't sure if it would affect her fertility after (thankfully it didn't). I definitely don't want to risk that!

Apple - sorry tensions are running high in your house too. Arguments with the hubby are never fun. They always end up being about something really stupid.

Slammer - that is frustrating about your new glider rocker not being that great now that you have it home. I am fairly picky as well so I can understand. I hope you grow to love it! Have fun at the zoo tomorrow!
I do not feel healed yet either and am having some stinging lately so I am nervous for my 6 week check-up as well.

AFM - DH admitted today he is having second thoughts about having a third child now. I told him we are Definitely having a third, and I am not too worried about him changing his mind permanently, but it made me realize maybe he is struggling with the adjustment to having a new baby more than I thought. I do remember he got really depressed after dd1 was born so I guess he has difficulty with the new baby phase. I hadn't thought he was since I am doing basically all the baby care, but he has definitely had more responsibilities with dd1 so that has probably been an adjustment for him.

 

[Midnight_Fairy]

Sending love to all.

We are currently using condoms. I refuse hormonal birth control. I had the copper coil which I loved but I feel like I need a break from it. We have tried pulling out a few times but I think it is too risky.

Vi did another 8-7 stretch but my toddler was doing the same at this age, it all went pearshaped at 4mths so I am just prepared for it to go pearshaped. Ah well!

Most days Vi will nap an hour unless we are out. She definitly sleeps less if I put her down. Feel like she is always being disturbed or woken!

 

[Midnight_Fairy]

Ll I think men struggle with tiny babies x

 

[Ally2015]

angel- that sounds so tough with melody sleeping in such short bouts! im having issues with isa being over tired too, it is so stessful. he will be awake for 1 hour or so, get sleepy but not sleep and then ends up being awake for another 2 hours crying.
I didn't wait till 6 weeks to have sex, as i felt fully healed, i had no stitches etc or anything and my bleeding had finished. I had my 6 week check yesterday when its been 8 weeks and all is good. was a little nervous about sex too but it was fine, no pain or anything Just relax and enjoy when you do its hard to find the time to dtd though!
using condoms for BC.

lit- joining you and angel with the fussy over tired babies...
so sorry about dh and his migraines. It sounds like you really need him to help you out! but i think you are right- he is struggling to adapt and deal with the changes. It might be nice to have a chat about it all?

vrogers - glad 6 week check went well. I had mines to and all was fine. I actually think i have my period just now-light red bleeding for about 4 days. its not painful or crampy like my normal periods. My dr told me to expect quite random and erratic periods etc when breastfeeding.


ali- sorry t is being fussy. seems to be a common complaint among many of us just now. Cut that your eldest is protective. As for condoms, maybe invest in thin ones as it almost feels like there is no condom on.. haha.

apple- nice to hear from you... yes silly arguments are so easy when you are so sleep deprived.

slammer- i hope u have a fab time at the zoo!

midnight- i agree with u on BC, i hate the pill. Pulling out too risky, i'll stick to condoms.

AFM- well... my mastitis pain got so bad i ended up in hospital. I developed an absess and had to get it drained. Was really not nice. however, it needed draining and i am glad i am finally healing. I got back home straight after, but im in bed and constantly have to change the dressing as there is so much pus coming out. I was supposed togo away with dh and isa tomorrow for the night as a birthday present for dh but had to cancel it all. Sigh... feeling sorry for myself (again ).
funny thing though- while the dr was draining me, dh had isa at the other end of the room and isa let out a series of huge farts. Was so funny.

one of the nurses there said to me that i might need to stay the night and i said what about my baby? she replied- he can go home with dad. I said well he doesn't have a pair of breasts so that isn't possible. She then said dh and baby can sit on chair next to my bed to sleep but that i wouldn't be allowed to take care of isa as i am the patient... i was so pissed off at her. Luckily i didn't have to stay the night anyway... but my god what stupid things to say.

last thing- after the mastitis and this abscess i feel so put off breastfeeding and thinking about weaning him off but in two minds about it. I guess i am scared of it happening again.

 

[Midnight_Fairy]

Ally,that is just shocking on the nurses attitude, they should be doing whatever they can to keep up to established breastfeeding.
The abses sounds nasty, I hope you feel better soon x

 

[AliJo]

Slammer - Pumping seems like such an annoying thing to have to do when you have everything else going on.

I could put the gate up in our "hallway" if you can call it that. If I have a bad day with T and O I'll do that. I just hate stepping over it haha.. going to get some with doors on them when we get a house.

I really think him not pooping for a couple of days affected him. He was super fussy last night for DH while I was gone, but I think it was because he was tired and he wasn't feeling comfort from the bottle. So I think DH got a taste of my horrible days. Other than that he was so much better yesterday. So far today hasn't been bad. It's still early, though.

I could just go downstairs to do laundry, buuuut those washers really suck and don't get my clothes clean. So instead of paying 1.50 for a load I go to the laundromat and pay 5 dollars a machine that can hold about 3 loads. Yesterday I didn't have enough to fill two of them but I ended up needed two so that was lame. Oh well. Then the dryers are 0.25 for 5 minutes. So that racks up quick. Thankfully they're huge and even both of my washer loads only needed one dryer and I did 50 minutes which was probably more than enough. I probably could do 40-45. I guess one little bonus is I at least get out for a couple of hours by myself. Sorry that got long.

Vrogers - Hopefully when it comes back it isn't worse for your. I think I'm one of the rare ones that got away with it being easier. I also didn't get after pains at all really with either. Just a minor ache while BFing that really could be missed. I wonder if they're connected. Didn't stop me from having horrible contractions. Ugh!

Lite - Yeah they have to go in and dilate and remove them. Ugh..

I like that there is less mess with condoms haha.. The pill will be fine I'm sure. If I get off of it I'll probably just track my cycles and avoid my fertile times. I know that's not very accurate without temping and what not, but we did it for awhile and was fine with the pull out method thrown into the mix when needed ha..

I'm sorry your hubby is struggling some. I know my DH is struggling as well a bit. It happened with our first as well, but the first time around I got really pulled down as well and two depressed people is just a recipe for disaster. It sucks to say, but I can't expect him to be there for me emotionally because usually when I need the emotional support he's worse off and needs it as well. I often feel like my sadness has to take the backseat and I'm not allowed to every feel down. In a way it helps me fight it so I guess that is good, but at times it really hurts. I don't have anyone else to go to.

Ally - We have, still really just don't want them. I'll at least stick to BC for the first year and then if I'm afraid of weight gain, lack of sex drive, etc.. I'll just get off of it and try really hard not to get pregnant. Heck.. might not have to try that hard. Hardly found time with 1 child let alone 2!

Oh gosh.. that sounds horrible and painful! Hopefully it's finally going to get better, though.

I'm sorry about your experience with the nurse. Over here it would be the same at least where I'm at. The whole issue is the child becomes a "liability" is how I've heard it said. So basically if something were to happen and you were unable to care for your child then it falls onto them. Or if something were to happen to your child while you were there it can fall onto them. My brother had to stay with my SIL for the week that she was at the hospital with complications after delivery because they couldn't allow my niece to stay without someone to take care of her that wasn't the patient. He was able to leave and get like food or something, but if he left overnight he would have had to take my niece. Chances are you'd be fine with him there, but they don't like to take chances.

Like Midnight said, though. They should always work with you!

That actually made me think of something. While I was doing clinical there was a lady in with mastitis. She was still breastfeeding her 18 month old. I thought nothing of it. Our clinical instructor on the other hand was helping with the care plan for suggestions of education or something. She said "how about educating on stopping breastfeeding. The kid is a year and half old it doesn't need to breastfeed anymore. It can eat and drink from a cup there is no reason for it." Something along those lines. If she was looking at me she probably would have seen my face twitch so hard. She was so snotty about it as well. I'm sitting there thinking "Well the World Health Organization thinks otherwise. Do you think your opinion is really greater than theirs?" Just what we need.. more health "professionals" making breastfeeding a taboo thing in the US. I didn't dare say anything. She was grading me and if you make instructors mad they can ruin you. Rant over lol

 

[pompeyvix]

Ali - Cant believe the clinician said that about breastfeeding an 18 month old, like what the hell?! It is well known that the WHO recommend breastfeeding until 2, so either she isn't clued up at all or she is very judgemental and think she knows best
Sorry you feel like you have to keep it together emotionally as your dh needs support more than you. It seems like you have a lot on your shoulders and really he be there to support you like you him

Ally - oh what an absolute nightmare with the mastitis and abscess. That sounds incredibly painful and nasty, I cant believe it got so bad I am not surprised it has put you off breastfeeding. Although I am incredibly surprised by the nurses reaction to you possibly needing to stay in overnight!

Midnight - Violet is sleeping so well at night! Throw me some of that magic whatever it is! Hopefully she won't be affected by the 4 month sleep regression!

slammer - you're post made me laugh! Sorry you went and got a new glider only to not like it very much You do seem quite hard to please, haha! I hope its working better for you now.
How did the zoo go?

LL - It sounds like there is a reason behind you dh's migraine and general attitude at home if he is struggling with having a newborn again. Hopefully this will pass quick as Vi gets more interactive and settled and things become more structured for you all. I am sure his thoughts on having a 3rd child aren't permanent.

Angel - not thought about BC yet, probably condoms to start with. To be fair my sex drive is non existent right now and my husband is being circumcised in a few weeks, so I imagine it'll be off the agenda for a while yet!

AFM - I can't believe Jamie is a month old now! His neck is getting stronger and when I hold him on my shoulder, he can move his head around to look rather than be all floppy. I would say he is a good sleeper as apart from waking to feed often, he can self settle (most of the time), he sleeps for long periods without waking and can take himself back to sleep when he wakes. He will sleep pretty much anywhere but much prefers to be close so we are bedsharing even though the cot is side carred to the bed. He is low maintenance, chilled and easy going. He only ever cries for milk or if he has wind. I am pretty sure he is starting to smile, but it's just not often.

I am SO PROUD of myself for feeding him breastmilk alone since he has been born. 98% of the time he is drinking from a bottle, but I latch him occasionally. I am expressing 6 times in 24 hours and currently have an over supply which means I have around 50 frozen bags in the freezer and we're running out of room. I have NO IDEA how long I am going to keep this up for, but I am certainly going to try for as long as possible. It's quite easy now as he is a sleepy newborn still and so expressing doesn't really take any time away from him, but as he gets bigger and more interactive it's not going to be as easy. Perhaps I'll manage to feed him more from the source? I just find I am not very graceful at breastfeeding.... I am so cack handed and where I have big boobs, I just cannot do it discreetly. I am happy to do it at home, but not happy to try outside the home. I can only feed him in one position (rugby) and need a huge cushion to get him latched on. At the moment expressing is working , so I won't worry!

 

[slammerkin]

Vrogers - wow, you're a champ for going across the house to feed in the night. I normally just sit up reclined in bed on pillows and then lay back down, or move to the rocker if he's being too fussy about being laid down. Though, do you have to go to the kitchen anyway to make a bottle? I always wonder how people do things in the middle of the night when it comes to bottle feeding.

Literati - I feel like your DH coming out with that revelation about reconsidering a third child really explains the migraines and distance. He must just be stressed at home, despite your best efforts to do it all (which is not fair on you anyway). I hope he starts to feel better about it all soon and doesn't end up with real depression like after your first.

Midnight - four months is always a bad time. My DD’s sleep went to crap then too and didn't get better until after a year.

Ally - oh my dear, I'm so sorry the mastitis has gotten that bad! That's terrible. I really hope you will be on the mend now. I can understand how this has put you off BF. Take care of yourself!

AliJo - at least I have a manual pump that I really like and find quick and easy to use. When I've been pumping the last few days I can get 3 oz from one breast in just a few minutes of pumping. That won't continue forever once supply regulates a bit more, but I should take advantage of it now.

That's very hard that you can't really get support from DH when you're struggling. At least we can be here for you. My DH is generally so even-keeled and not prone to being depressed or anything. Thankful for that.

Oh LAWD about what that instructor said about BF at 18 months. It's no wonder so many doctors and nurses give the worst advice when it comes to BF.

Pompey - I know, I'm ridiculous, aren't I?! LOL. I know I'm picky and a little crazy though, heh. This is kind of my way...I agonize over a decision (I had been looking online at gliders for a couple days), then finally make a decision, and then spend ages torturing myself over whether I made the right choice. Drives my husband crazy, lol.

Happy one month to Jamie! Jack is a month old today! I'm glad Jamie is such an easy baby for you. And jealous, lol. And you're a rock star for pumping and feeding him exclusively breastmilk! It would be nice if you were able to feed from the breast more and in easier positions to where you were comfortable with it in public. Rugby hold would def be a bit awkward to manage.

AFM - regarding the glider, lol… It grew on me a bit once I turned it to face the foot of my bed so I could push off from a stationary object instead of the gliding ottoman it came with. And the bed is at the right height to rest my legs on when not rocking. I spend an hour or two in it this morning dozing with Jack and it was fine. Just missing the all around padding of the other recliner since this one is a wood frame. Anyway...like you all care about such details! Hehehe.

The zoo was good. I used my new Beco Gemini carrier and Jack slept in that almost the whole time. Very comfortable to carry him in. Only bad thing was he really hated the car ride there and back and cried almost the whole 30 min drive each way. Really stressed me out and I tried to sit in the back with him and calm him with a pacifier, but he was on and off with it.

Back to the birth control topic - I know a lot of people use the pull out method, but I dunno how y’all can stand it, lol. Neither of us want the interruption right at the, ahem, best moment. Heh.

 

[Literati_Love]

Midnight - I agree about men and tiny babies. How does your DH handle this phase? The 4 month sleep regression is pretty much the worst thing ever, isn't it? If Violet ever starts doing longer stretches, which it doesn't look like she will, I will not be getting my hopes up because of that as well.

Ali - oh my goodness! That's so horrible your mastitis got so bad you had to go to the hospital! I had never even heard of getting an abscess from mastitis before! Yikes! I am so so sorry and don't blame you at all for being put off BFing. I can't believe that about what the nurse said. So ridiculous. I have always wondered what people do if they are hospitalized when they have a baby. Doesn't sound like I want to know the answer! What a stupid system. I am glad you didn't have to stay overnight.

Ali - I am so sorry you don't ever feel like you're allowed to feel down and that you have to be the "strong" one. I do know how you feel and that isn't a fun feeling at all. I also got pulled down last time and you are right that two depressed people does not make for a good combo! I hope you manage not to get pulled down again, and hopefully your DH will adjust sooner this time too.
That is horrible about what your instructor said. I would have been so mad!

Pompey - you have done an excellent job providing 100% breastmilk all this time! I would never have had the patience to pump that much! That is a shame only the rugby hold will work for you when BFing.
I am glad Jamie settles well at night even though he feeds a lot. I think that more than anything has the potential to make him turn into a good sleeper eventually.

Slammer - I agree the migraines/distance mystery is pretty much 'solved' now.

I am glad you like the chair better now!

It is very stressful when they cry for car rides! Violet did the same when we returned from our errands today (but thankfully not a whole 30 min) and it stressed me out a lot!

AFM - Violet Is either going through a growth spurt or she suddenly has her days and nights mixed up. She was up to feed every 90 minutes last night. It was not very fun, But I am fine with it as long as it's not a permanent thing! She did feed a lot more during the day on Wed, then slept a lot more than usual yesterday, then the frequent feedings last night, so I am guessing that it was indeed a growth spurt and should hopefully be over now.

I love how supportive everyone on this thread is. Makes me happy!

 

[AliJo]

My DH is dealing with more than just having a new baby. His mother's health just keeps declining and although he's no longer close to her it's still really bothering him. Her kidneys are failing now due to an antibiotic they had to have her on for her bone infection and they had to remove more of her foot. If something were to happen to her his father isn't able to take care of himself properly in some ways. He has really bad dyslexia and never learned how to manage it since back when he was in school they didn't help children with it. So he's unable to read or write and will only drive to places he knows how to get to. He can't even write his sons name, Ryan, without help if that gives you an idea of how bad it is. He can sign his own because he's done it so many times.

The first time around I definitely had more on my plate, but he still wasn't able to be there for me. There was a couple of times through school I could have really used his support and instead he got distant from me. Depression sucks. Really hoping one day I can really really look into myself and say "You know, I'm not depressed!"

Lite - I haven't felt depressed like I did the first time around. It really helps that I didn't have to turn around and go right back to school. I lied so hard on all the depression assessment forms that they have at every appointment I have for my children. I know when to seek help and I was still able to manage back then so I didn't want them prying. This time I'm just really stressed, but not so much depressed. The stress is making me feel crazy, though! I need to figure out ways to manage it better. Not sure how to yet.

Really hope it is just a growth spurt for Violet! I'm sure it is. I think T hit his 6 week growth spurt early. If it isn't over I hope it is soon!

Slammer - Yeah, I was definitely thinking how I can at least talk to you guys! It helps a lot more than you would think.

I should get a good manual one for on the go.

Haha.. yeah that definitely sucks about the pull out method. Probably why we only did it when I was most at risk for getting pregnant. We both can have those "I don't even care" moments right at the end and risk it, though. Which is why I got pregnant a month before we were going to try for sure.

I'm sorry he cried during the car ride. I can't even climb in the back anymore to try to comfort that way. There's hardly any space between the car seats. One time while we were heading back from Michigan from visiting Ryan's family.. O was just crying and crying and I told DH he needed to pull off so I could feed. I didn't have a pump since we forgot to grab batteries. Well he passed the first exit and I just twitched. I can't remember why he didn't pull off, but I was annoyed with it. Couldn't calm down O so I just pulled my boob out and leaned over his car seat awkwardly and fed him. He passed back out and DH never pulled off interstate. He asked me "Do you still want me to pull off so you can feed him since he fell back asleep" "I already fed him.." Didn't even see me do it haha

Pomp - Depression is a pain. I'm definitely stronger when it comes to dealing with it both with myself and with others. If I get depressed he can't handle it or doesn't know how to and generally he just gets more depressed when I do. Doesn't mean I don't get a little upset about it, but he really just doesn't have that skill to handle such things. He doesn't know how to be therapeutic at all.

Pomp - All of our babies are getting so old! (because a month is old! ) It's fun to watch them looking around! I'm glad he's chill. O was such a chill baby. I use to always talk about how he would hardly ever cry unless he was hungry and blah blah blah. I'm paying for it with T haha..

I'm a DD/E at the moment and even that can be a bit awkward at times. I usually have to use both hands to position properly. I can free hand it if we're laying down and I'm not too full. I never wanted to do it in public with my first and always tried to have a bottle ready. Now I just don't even care and I will find a way to feed him if need be. Less hassle, but I haven't been out with him too much yet.

AFM - T was being cranky since he needed to sleep. I swaddled him which he generally hates, but I found he doesn't mind it too much if I'm holding him or if he's in the swing and tired. Of course it alone won't calm him down to sleep so I asked Alexa to play white noise and turned it up, put him in the swing, managed to get him to take his paci, and he fell asleep. Last night I didn't swaddle but I cranked the sink on to get him to calm down and fall asleep. He was crying so hard his voice was shaking. I was desperate and was so glad that worked.

Well I managed to get a reply wrote up over several hours. Ha..!

Also have supper cooking! Yay for the crock pot! Something super simple my brother sent me. 16 oz of cream cheese, one packet of ranch dressing mix, and 2 lbs of boneless skinless chicken breast. Just throw it in there on low for like 6-8 hours and once the chicken starts to shred easy you just mix it all up and eat it on sandwiches or can use it as dip and they said something else. Got some bacon crumbles to top it with.

 

[Angel5000]

I've had 3 nights in a row where Melody hasn't screamed like a banshee at night! Of course, last night was a rough night for sleeping, but it was better than listening to her scream for 1-2 hours at 9:30!

Our swing motor started to die this week (I bought it used for $10 so 6 weeks of use isn't bad), and it's my saving grace. I need that swing. There are days when the only thing she wants is to swing and everything else makes her cry. I bought another swing on Offer Up for $20 and we got it home and it the motor wouldn't work. I contacted the lady and she offered a refund because she said it worked hte last time she used it, but that was months ago and we were stupid not to test it before we took it. Anyway, DH did some tinkering since the two swings used the same motor and used pieces from each to make the new one work! It's working much better than our old one, and much quieter! I'm SO happy. I put M down in it awhile ago and she slept for over 2 hours. She needed it since she wouldn't sleep more than 30 minutes all day.



Ali - I am worried about the pill killing my sex drive. I feel like I had a diminished drive when on the pill before but I can't be sure because I was on it for SO LONG and then only got off for TTC. I've heard not so good things about the IUD, otherwise I'd consider it.

Good luck starting up a pumping session. If you'er worried about production you could also try mothers milk tea? I don't know how well it really works but a few people recommended it to me. I am going to try to be more consistent with doing a daily pumping session too, but I can't get more than 3-4 oz in a session and so I'm not building up a very big stash very quickly.

I've found that if Melody hasn't gone poop for awhile then if I give her some gas drops she will end up having a big poop shortly after. I don't know if it's because it helps her relax or just helps everything move along, but it definitely keeps things moving (and keeps her happier). She gets really tense when she needs to go and if I can get her to relax she'll poop and then be much less fussy.

Your crockpot meal sounds AMAZING. I froze up a bunch of crockpot meals before I went into labor so I've got probably 10 bags left in the freezer, and we can eat off of them for 2-3 days sometimes. Makes for easy dinner.


Lite - I thought about condoms briefly...but both Dh and I hate them so I know we'd never use them. I have also heard horror stories about IUDs so I'm not really up for that option either.

Oh wow, I guess your DH really is struggling. I'm sorry he's having second thoughts about a 3rd child, but maybe once you get past some of the difficult times he'll forget about how hard this was and be more open. I forget that men can have a rough time adjusting too.


Slammer - Well, at least it's good to know that it's normal for them not to sleep long if I put her down. That's encouraging. I did get a 3 hour nap from her yesterday in her swing, which was a huge relief because she'd been fighting sleep all day and basically demanding to be held all day or she would cry. It was a needy day. I hope it doesn't take 6 months for her to sleep better!

I've never really considered a diaphram. I'd have to do some looking into that. As for pullout method...I'm with you there, neither of us wants to pull out and have the interruption at that point.


Ally - That's great that you didn't have any stitches to worry about. I've been waiting for my stitches to finish healing and fall out. I'm pretty sure it's all healed now. You're right though, it'll be hard to find the time to dtd! With LO not sleeping consistently I think I'll be constantly expecting her to wake up, and that doesn't really help the mood!

Oh that absess sounds awful! I'm so sorry! I can't believe that nurse said you wouldn't be allowed to take care of Isa. Ugh, what a stupid thing to say. As if you just NOT care for your baby. I can completely understand being scared to breastfeed, I would be too. Do whatever is best for you,


Pompey - yeah my sex drive is fairly low atm too. I just feel bad for DH. It's been awhile. Your DH is being circumcised? Wow, I didn't figure that most men would choose to do that as an adult. Is it too nosy to ask why he chose to do that now? Just curious. My DH is uncircumcised and I'm pretty sure he'd say absolutely Heck No to getting it done at this point (not that I care).

Sounds like Jamie is doing so well! THat's great that he's gaining neck strength. I was so relieved when Melody reached the point where she can mostly look around because I am not nearly as worried about "breaking her" Sounds like he's doing a great job sleeping! Want to send some of that magic my way?

 

[Literati_Love]

Ali- oh, I have definitely lied on those depression screening tests too! Something always stops me from letting a professional know I am depressed. I have no interest in ever going on meds, so I guess I figure there is no point in a doctor knowing since all they will offer is that anyway.
I am glad to hear you aren't feeling depressed this time, but I certainly understand feeling stressed! That is how I feel as well. I have had some low days and I am not sure if I will sink into depression or not, but I definitely feel stressed with two!
It definitely appeared to just be a growth spurt for Violet. She slept much better last night, although she made up for it by nursing more frequently during the day, which is fine.
I wish your DH would give you a bit more emotional support.
Sorry T was so upset last night.
Yay for a crockpot meal! I have not cooked once since Violet was born, but I will have to start this week. It's going to be a lot of freezer meals.

Angel - that is amazing about Melody not screaming for a few nights! We have managed to keep violet's crying to a minimum the last two nights but there is definitely still some fussiness and some brief harder crying. I doubt we are out of the woods yet but we are starting to figure out what works and what doesn't.
(Edited to add: pretty much as soon as I posted this, the screaming started for the night. Guess I should have known better than to have said anything!)

It is definitely easy to forget that men can have trouble adjusting too.

 

[vrogers]

Ally- ugh, I'm sorry about the mastitis and the nurses comment! I would feel the exact same way as you. I'm glad you didn't end up having to stay overnight and I hope you heal quickly!
I can't blame you at all for being put off a bit from BFing and why you would go back and forth on what to do. I hope you ultimately are able to do what you want and think is best for both you and baby!

Pompey- glad to hear you and Jamie are doing so well! Congrats on the entire month with breast milk, that really is amazing and you should be proud of yourself

Slammer- I do have to go to the kitchen to make a bottle, and the living room is closer than the bedroom or nursery. I would definitely feed her in bed if it weren't for possibly waking dh (he works weekdays)!
Glad you ended up liking the glider! Saves having to return it or being unhappy with a purchase. I'm sure you'll get good use out of it
Also glad the zoo went so well..other than the car ride! Lillian does thankfully seem to enjoy car rides, she just HATES the process of being put in car seat haha
And I totally get what you mean with the POM ruining the moment! We use it and have since we got married, and it does kill the mood abruptly. The only good part is no leaking after

Literati- ouch, 90 min! You have a good attitude about it though, I would be a mess haha. It does make sense like you said though, Lillian tends to do the same thing with feedings/sleep!
I agree with loving the support of this thread, I am thankful for the little group we've got and how helpful and kind everyone here is, every other pregnancy/baby board I've been a part of has had some drama (babycenter and WTE app for example) and it amazes me how this group and board in general has such an amazing bunch of ladies! Sorry for the sappiness, I'll blame the hormones lol

Ali- wow white noise and similar noises sound like magic! I've always heard people recommend that the most with getting babies to sleep. We have a little turtle that lights up and plays ocean sounds for about 30 min, and I also use a white noise app. It seems to help a lot!
I LOVE our crock pot! thank you for the recipe, that sounds delicious and super easy, and I am always looking for new recipes! Think we may try that this week actually.

Angel- yay for no screaming! Nights can be so stressful here too.
Also that's awesome about the swing especially since (new) swings can be quite pricey. Our swing is a lifesaver as well, could not do without it!

 

[AliJo]

The chicken was pretty good! For being as quick and easy as it was I can't complain. It said you can substitute 8 oz of the cream cheese with bacon cream cheese to give it a bacon flavor. I'll just link it to you guys lol

https://cookiesandcups.com/slow-cooker-crack-chicken/

That's the recipe. I ended up adding a little extra chicken and even on low it was done early. I can't remember when I put it in but it was done a lot quicker than it said it would be.

My hubby definitely approved.

I need to find some good crock pot meals that I can put together and freeze till I'm ready to cook them. I can't do it till we get a house, but I think it will be a life saver to always have some on hand. DH doesn't cook so it would be good for him since he can just throw it in and turn it on during the days I work. That way I'm not coming home to frozen pizza or something and my boys can have more nutritious food lol

Lite - Let's hope we don't get depressed! I don't have time for it and I'm sure you don't.

Yep, I definitely don't want to get on medication. I would if I HAD to. As in I couldn't get it under control and it was affecting me taking care of my family. I was on them once as a kid. I did not care about anything. I didn't care that my life was bad, didn't care that school was horrible, didn't care about how people treated me, didn't care about anything. I stopped hurting.. but I also stopped feeling anything else. Just flat out didn't care. Of course I could have been put on something else, but I just stopped taking them after a month.

Angel - That's great!! T sometimes does that, but it isn't always and the last time the faucet running was my savior.

That's awesome that your hubby was able to make one swing work! Work better even! I wish T liked his swing more. He simply does not want put down while he's awake. I can sometimes lay him on the floor for awhile, but you put him anywhere else he usually screams as soon as you put him down. I can get him to sleep in it during the day at least. I have been able to get 3 hour naps with him in the swing.

AFM - So, finally got the chance to DTD yesterday! T was asleep in the swing and O passed out on the couch so I woke hubby early. I don't think he cared! I was a little cautious because I didn't want it to hurt although I wasn't afraid of it as much as I was after O. I was hurting for 6 months after him. It felt like it had the potential to hurt, but never actually did. Then I was having troubles getting into it at first because I was paranoid one of the boys would wake up and DH said he was afraid he would hurt me like last time. It all turned out fine and we were able to enjoy it.

There was something else I was going to say real quick, but I can't for the life of me remember. Oh well.. maybe later.

 

[newbie2013]

I'd love a crock pot! I like your idea of preparing a meal to freeze and then dh could throw it in and turn it on. My dh doesn't cook either, so that would be really handy for us. I'm going to try to buy one when I'm home this summer. It was on my shopping list for last summer but ended up coming back weighed down with baby stuff.

I encourage you all to seek help if you feel depressed in any way. Medication may not be the answer, but treatment of some kind is vital. Allowing a professional to help you understand how to help yourself is so important. Dh ignored his mental health issues for too long and got to the point of being suicidal. He caught himself on the brink and now receives regular counselling sessions (in conjunction with medication, but he's an extreme case).

Afm - to say the last week has been stressful is a ridiculous understatement. Since last Monday, we've moved out whole apartment, I started work, and dh has left for his work conference in Australia for two weeks (he's visiting family as well). Oh, I also went to my friend's engagement party. I'm exhausted. Z has been quite unsettled as well. Poor thing - new house to sleep in, being taken into work everyday, mummy not being around much during the day, being fed with a bottle (expressed milk). He hardly slept today at all. I'm hoping he'll sleep better tonight.

Have to post now because my eyes are closing on me so I'll doze until he wakes up again.

 

[AliJo]

Newbie - How is work going? I'm starting to feel bummed about going back the closer it gets. I'll be glad to bring in some more money and hopefully start building back up what we used, but bleh.

Thanks for the suggestion in regards to depression. I've struggled with it since before I was a teenager. I know a professional may be able to give me new ways or better ways to manage, but I have learned to do pretty well myself. I definitely don't suggest it to anyone. My hubby is someone who needs professional help for sure in my opinion. I just got to get him to get it.

Soo..

Got T dressed only for him to blow out soon after. O never really had blow outs. T is being a little game changer.

Speaking of which. Does anyone have any go to baby stain removing techniques they would like to share?

For me I don't have anything special. I usually have a stain remover that I will use but doesn't always work and I have to hit it with multiple things. I do use special baby detergent that is suppose to help get baby stains out, but I don't know if it does much better than regular. Part of the reason I use it is because it's suppose to be hypoallergenic.

 

[slammerkin]

Literati - Glad.Violet slept better after the night of 90 minute wakings. Welcome to my world with the 90 minute intervals. Except it's every 90 minutes and then hourly or less after 4 am. So fun...not! OK ok, call me a waaambulance.

AliJo - that is a lot of stress for your DH. I hope you both manage to stay less depressed this time around.

I fed DD a few times dangling over the car seat too, but of course that's dangerous too, lol. I ended up taking Jack out of the seat once we were on the zoo grounds looking for parking because I couldn't take it and I figured we were safe enough moving at low speeds.

Glad you were able to use the swaddle and swing to get T to sleep. I'm already to the point where Jack is too damn heavy to be bouncing around with. We've been wearing out the exercise ball with him, but even sitting it's still a lot for my supporting arm. Gonna be using my carriers a lot more and hopefully more sidelying nursing to sleep once my supply chills out out some more.

Dinner sounds great! I always want to do crock pot meals and freezer meals, but I never do it.

That's awesome you had sex and it didn't hurt! I'm gonna be so nervous the first time, and I know it's still not going to be for quite a while. I didn't even try until 13 weeks after DD. Definitely not all healed down there yet.

For stains I use a product called Ecover. It works pretty well and is a bit more on the natural side...usually find it with other natural cleaning products.

Angel - awesome on Melody doing better in the evenings! I hope things stay better and get better overnight too.

That's awesome your DH was able to fix the swing! Do you put her to sleep in it, or put her down already asleep?

Let me know if you have questions about the diaphragm. I really wish it would gain more popularity and be more readily available.

Vrogers - How is Lillian doing now on the new formula and medicine?

Sorry she hates being put in the car seat too. Jack doesn't like being put in, taken out, or the ride. Ugh.I really thought he'd fall asleep after a few mins, especially since both times he was asleep before putting him in, but nope.

Newbie - sounds like a super stressful week! I hope things calm down now. It's definitely a hard adjustment for both mom and baby when you go back work.

AFM - Jack has been either eating, sleeping, or fussing because he wants to sleep pretty much all day. And didn't sleep great last night either. I'm tired. And DD is sick...hopefully just a cold..please no flu! Really don't want to keep her home from daycare tomorrow.

Those on their second child...how are you finding your bond with the new babies compared to how it happened with your oldest? Both DH and I have felt it's taking longer to feel it this time. And it took me three weeks with DD before I really fell in love with her. I'm still not quite there with Jack. Not that I don't love him, but it's not the same at all. It's probably because we don't have the time to just sit and stare at him and all that, the way you do with your first. I was feeling this a couple days ago and wasn't going to mention it to DH, but then he said out of nowhere that Jack was finally growing on him and the feelings were coming - that at first he was just kind of going through the motions. I think his feelings are ahead of mine now, which is kind of sad, right, because I'm his mother and should be head over heels? Bah. I'm not concerned. It's just weird and different. I'm sure I'll just keep getting to know him and love him more and more. But by this time with DD I knew and loved every inch of her...could not have loved her more.