July Babies!

[SLCMommy]

We told all the immediate family yesterday with Merry Christmas Grandparent cards with a picture of the ultrasound. We have been very sneaky about this because everyone was VERY shocked. My mom actually thought it was from my brother (she didn't read the card). We are going to wait until my Jan 6th scan to tell aunts and uncles and such. Just siblings, parents and grandparents know.

I did have a very negative response from my SIL. She and I have never gotten along, as she is a compulsive liar . When Mom opened the card she thought is was theirs. They have been ttc for months after a tubal reversal in June. Dad corrected her and said no it is these two. Mom then tries to tell us congratulations, but SIL interrupts with a full run down of their journey up until this point. She talked for 5 minutes about how hard it is and what a struggle they are having. My parents did not even get to say Congratulations or when is it due or how far along are you? So my other brother, who always has my side, interrupts her monologue and says "That is so hard, but lets hear about sissy's baby!" She ended up walking out of the house and brother, her husband, just let her leave. He said "she is just sad, but we are very happy for you. Tell us all about it."

I feel terrible for them, bc they really have tried and it was so easy for us. At the same time, I think my goodness, can you not just sit quietly for 5 minutes and let me have my moment??!! She is one of those one upper people. If you have had a good day, hers was better. If you had a bad day, hers was worse. If you invented a cure to cancer, she had a similar idea last year, but no time to develop it!!! Frustrated that she partially dampened my news. DH's family was all wonderful though. So I will count my blessings and pray for her. haha

Sorry that was so long! Rant!

I'm so sorry your SIL had to act like a child. While, I do understand her sadness, I wouldn't blame her if AFTER she let you talk if she went outside and shed a tear or two. In away, I wouldn't find it jealousy, but rather a reminder of what her own struggles are. However, the way she acted and trying to get the shine was completely inappropriate!!
I think you deserved, and still deserve your moment to shine. Just because she is having a hard time TTC, doesn't mean that you shouldn't have your moment, and that nobody should be happy for you. When you TTC, it's maturity that tells you "Everyone's TTC timeline is different. I have to put away my own struggles and jealousy for now and just be happy for her".

Although, this is just me personally, and please don't take offense to it. I am not trying to be mean and I need you to know that I am saying this 100% with a sincere heart. Although I do 100% agree that you DO deserve your "moment", I think if you already know her struggle to TTC (despite the fact she's always an attention seeker) perhaps announcing your BFP at a family gathering/holiday wasn't the most sensitive way to go. If I had a SIL who I knew was TTC and wasn't successful at it, I (personally) would of found a more discreet way to tell the family, and/or I would of told my SIL first so she wasn't put in that emotional torn position. If I was her, having my family think it was me that got a BFP in the card, when it wasn't, and I was having TTC issues, would really break my heart.

-Ashley

 

[Bunnikins]

Yeah i can understand her upset, but the way she acted was childish, just storming out like that. When i was TTC and thinking it would never ever happen, if people told me they were pregnant, i would imagine how happy i would feel if it were me, and be pleased for them. How would she like it if her "announcement" was ruined like this...

 

[mlyn26]

We told all the immediate family yesterday with Merry Christmas Grandparent cards with a picture of the ultrasound. We have been very sneaky about this because everyone was VERY shocked. My mom actually thought it was from my brother (she didn't read the card). We are going to wait until my Jan 6th scan to tell aunts and uncles and such. Just siblings, parents and grandparents know.

I did have a very negative response from my SIL. She and I have never gotten along, as she is a compulsive liar . When Mom opened the card she thought is was theirs. They have been ttc for months after a tubal reversal in June. Dad corrected her and said no it is these two. Mom then tries to tell us congratulations, but SIL interrupts with a full run down of their journey up until this point. She talked for 5 minutes about how hard it is and what a struggle they are having. My parents did not even get to say Congratulations or when is it due or how far along are you? So my other brother, who always has my side, interrupts her monologue and says "That is so hard, but lets hear about sissy's baby!" She ended up walking out of the house and brother, her husband, just let her leave. He said "she is just sad, but we are very happy for you. Tell us all about it.h"

I feel terrible for them, bc they really have tried and it was so easy for us. At the same time, I think my goodness, can you not just sit quietly for 5 minutes and let me have my moment??!! She is one of those one upper people. If you have had a good day, hers was better. If you had a bad day, hers was worse. If you invented a cure to cancer, she had a similar idea last year, but no time to develop it!!! Frustrated that she partially dampened my news. DH's family was all wonderful though. So I will count my blessings and pray for her. haha

Sorry that was so long! Rant!

I'm so sorry your SIL had to act like a child. While, I do understand her sadness, I wouldn't blame her if AFTER she let you talk if she went outside and shed a tear or two. In away, I wouldn't find it jealousy, but rather a reminder of what her own struggles are. However, the way she acted and trying to get the shine was completely inappropriate!!
I think you deserved, and still deserve your moment to shine. Just because she is having a hard time TTC, doesn't mean that you shouldn't have your moment, and that nobody should be happy for you. When you TTC, it's maturity that tells you "Everyone's TTC timeline is different. I have to put away my own struggles and jealousy for now and just be happy for her".

Although, this is just me personally, and please don't take offense to it. I am not trying to be mean and I need you to know that I am saying this 100% with a sincere heart. Although I do 100% agree that you DO deserve your "moment", I think if you already know her struggle to TTC (despite the fact she's always an attention seeker) perhaps announcing your BFP at a family gathering/holiday wasn't the most sensitive way to go. If I had a SIL who I knew was TTC and wasn't successful at it, I (personally) would of found a more discreet way to tell the family, and/or I would of told my SIL first so she wasn't put in that emotional torn position. If I was her, having my family think it was me that got a BFP in the card, when it wasn't, and I was having TTC issues, would really break my heart.

-Ashley

I agree. I would have found it difficult after 2 losses and 3 years ttc no 1. It is embarrassing and heartbreaking when people announce with no warning. She Will have most prob regretted her response but emotions and hormones are powerful things.
Don't worry she Will be pleased for you. Just give her time. Xx

 

[peacelikeariv]

Perhaps. It is hard to know how to share in just the right way. We wanted to do a big announcement as it is our first and my brothers already have children. The family has been after us for years to go ahead and have a lo of our own. Now that we have decided to start telling, I don't think I can contain my excitement!

 

[mlyn26]

Yeah and at the end of the day you deserve to share your exciting news. Just think she may just find it difficult at first x

 

[SLCMommy]

I think I would just found a different way to share.

I'm not in ANY way saying you don't deserve your moment because someone elses struggles cannot be your own, ya know?

My BFF has infertility, and she cries and prays to God all the time to get pregnant. Both myself and her Sister in law both got pregnant at the same time Even though I was happy for myself, I was really sensitive on how to told her because I love her to the ends of the earth.

But, at the end of the day, your SIL was very immature by "storming" out....
What kind of an adult does that??...

 

[frisbeemama12]

wow.. I wouldve ignored her. What a child!
I dont know what to think anymore.. my jeans still fit mostly and I had that day of bleeding but since then I havent had any bleeding or anything and my breasts have been so sore the past few days and today I really noticed they are MUCH larger than normal... I cant wait for insurance to get back to me and let me know if I can go to the ER and have it covered... I want ANSWERS!!!!!!!

 

[SLCMommy]

Ladies...Question

How many of you right now are stay-at- home mothers?

Who plans on being a Stay-at-home-mommy after the birth of their baby?

 

[albs]

Ladies...Question

How many of you right now are stay-at- home mothers?

Who plans on being a Stay-at-home-mommy after the birth of their baby?

I really wish I could, I'd love it! But unfortunately my job pays twice dh's. We're going to try and work it so that I can take as much time as poss off (hopefully nine months) then figure out a way for lo to spend as little time as possible in daycare. I hate the thought of leaving a little baby in daycare, but at the sametime if I didn't go back to work at least part time we wouldn't be able to pay our rent! We'll just have to make the days we don't work as special as possible.

 

[frisbeemama12]

Ive been a stay at home mom since early 2010. DH is in the military and does really well for only having a few expenses. We have no debt we have been very lucky so far in life. My DD is 3 and a half and she can already sound out words and recognize letters by their sound. Shes WAY ahead of average and I think its because I get to spend that time with her teaching her. We do something writing and something reading twice a day if not more, Once she gets into school age we are still considering homeschooling but we are keeping the option open for her to go to public school so I can start working again, get out of the house sometimes

 

[Bunnikins]

I wish i could, but unfortunately, a mortgage and bills dictate that i have to return to work part time... plus if im honest i think i MIGHT go insane if i never worked. I trained for 5 years to do my job so its kind of a big part of my life i suppose... am hoping to work 1 or 2 days a wk.

 

[Bug222]

I too will be headed back to work after baby.. I get a year of mat leave. My job pays more than DH's and I love what I do. Plus my benefits are pretty amazing. Maybe I will look into a 0.7 line or something.

 

[pitty]

My 13 weeks scan went great today, brings tears to our eyes seeing the LO, LO was even clapping hands together....

 

[albs]

My 13 weeks scan went great today, brings tears to our eyes seeing the LO, LO was even clapping hands together....

so glad it went well for you! isn't it awesome?! our little dude was waving and boxing!

 

[SLCMommy]

Pitty - That's soo cute!!

I fell asleep with DH at 7:30 PM, woke up at 1:30 AM fully rested...

arghh,........!

 

[bluberrymufin]

im a SAHM and hopefully will be at least til all the kids are in school then may go back to work part time

 

[frisbeemama12]

Oh my goodness girls!!!!!! BEST Christmas EVER!!! I went to the ER since I had the bleeding and no symptoms since.. well according to the ultrasound and the drs I have a perfect and healthy 9 week 4 day old baby in there!!!! Im so happy right now!! I was able to watch the little heart beat and watch him/her sqwirm around!!!!! BEST FEELING EVER!!!!!!!!

 

[SLCMommy]

frisbee - YAY! What a great feeling to know that LO in the tummy is doing great, isn't it? Now you can be rest assured that it indeed is a sticky bean

 

[frisbeemama12]

Im still cautious but Im overjoyed right now, I guess this one is going to be much different than my DD because I had such bad morning sickness with her I was losing weight! I havent had ANYTHING like that with this lo! SO odd! I didnt get to hear the heart beat but I saw it on the ultrasound! Im so happy!

 

[majm1241]

Congrats pitty!

I hope everyone is doing well today. My MS kicked back in full gear today and it figures because I have a 3 & a 4 year old today. I have them until 5 p.m. too. Also, I am miserable with (TMI) Constipation. Nothing is working.