Ladies who are 40+

[prickly]

Well..another interesting night last night...cramping and stomach churning from 10pm until 3am..accompanied by sharp nipping in sides of pelvis / ovaries...temps still pretty much flatlined...keep knicker checking as feel wet sensations but only watery cm...expected temp to drop today...never get these kind of cramps and they are only coming evening / night times as they are only just noticeable during the day

Still don't want to test until tomorrow when AF is due...don't want to see another chemical...but am pretty certain the eggie fertilised and at least tried to implant 7-8dpo...strange month this has been. Am not feeling moody, grumpy or irritable day before AF like I usually do...just this horrible sickly churny cramping in my stomach and sharp nipping in my sides...

How is everyone else?

 

[ALISON69]

Well..another interesting night last night...cramping and stomach churning from 10pm until 3am..accompanied by sharp nipping in sides of pelvis / ovaries...temps still pretty much flatlined...keep knicker checking as feel wet sensations but only watery cm...expected temp to drop today...never get these kind of cramps and they are only coming evening / night times as they are only just noticeable during the day

Still don't want to test until tomorrow when AF is due...don't want to see another chemical...but am pretty certain the eggie fertilised and at least tried to implant 7-8dpo...strange month this has been. Am not feeling moody, grumpy or irritable day before AF like I usually do...just this horrible sickly churny cramping in my stomach and sharp nipping in my sides...

How is everyone else?

HI Prickly,
Just wondering how your getting along and if you tested BFP?

thinking of you

 

[dancareoi]

Just over 4 1/2 weeks left for me due to induction at 38 weeks!

 

[vermeil]

just wanted to chime in - I'm 41 and 20 weeks along with our second. It took 18 months to get here, but we are lucky, IVF is covered 100% here. Our first IVF resulted in a chemical at 6 weeks. The first FET (frozen egg transfer) 3 months later - poof it worked.

I am convinced I would have eventually fallen pregnant naturally but why leave it to chance when we have this great public program

great to meet other wonderful ladies here!

 

[ALISON69]

Just over 4 1/2 weeks left for me due to induction at 38 weeks!

Exciting stuff Dancareoi.. good luck and keep us all updated

 

[eblondie]

Hi. I thought I'd post here to say hello I'm 40 and I'm 5 weeks pregnant with my second child (after 4 miscarriages and a long journey of 16 years)

 

[dancareoi]

Hi, congratulations.

I am 42 and after 2 years (with 2 mmc) I gave birth to our fourth 2 weeks ago !

 

[Oasis717]

Hi couldn't read all the posts but just wanted to add after 2 mc last year I am now 2 days overdue! Also we will be trying for another after our son xxxx

 

[ALISON69]

Hi couldn't read all the posts but just wanted to add after 2 mc last year I am now 2 days overdue! Also we will be trying for another after our son xxxx

congrats Oasis717.

just wondered how things are going?
and what part of Kent are from?

 

[Oasis717]

Thank you I'm 12 days over today and unfortunately have caught Gastroenteritis so have suffered today v much. I am quite glad there was no bed to induce me today as I've barely left the bathroom since 7am and can honestly say I've never been so ill in my lifetime am supposed to be getting induced tomorrow. I've had fairly regular contractions since 7am every 6/7 mins now but am unsure if it's early labour as they aren't lengthening as yet just regular. Oh and I'm in Chatham (Medway Towns) xx.

 

[Driving280]

Hello all! So here I am, tentatively, keeping fingers crossed. Second BFP in 5 months, hoping this one sticks...

 

[dancareoi]

Congrats driving. I think you joined us another thread as I have you listed on the first page as TTC . On a TTC over 40 after loss thread. Come join us again, we have 3 rainbows born so far, 2 due very soon and another due in feb next year.

 

[Gemini7181]

Hi! I am knew to the site thanks to a friend! I am tring to take in as much information as I can I had my tubes reconnected on 8/2/13 and am on my 3rd month of TTC . I have two boys from a previous marriage, they are 12.5 & 10.5. So i am a little nervous of how all this is going to go and wanted to be able to chat with other women.

 

[Oasis717]

Hi Gemini, I'm 42 next week and my rainbow son is 4 weeks old today ( in case you didn't know rainbow baby is a baby born after a loss/losses) I had two mc last year then got my bfp in Jan this year and my son was born perfect on 18/10. Wishing you masses of luck on your ttc journey we will be trying for another next year. I have two girls from a previous relationship and my husband and I now have two boys together any questions please ask xxxx

 

[onceisenough1]

Good luck to you ladies!

 

[waitandwonder]

Hi, 42+ a few months here and SO and I aren't even married yet and the pressure has been on from others with the comments about my age and others commenting on younger family members who "if they don't do it now they're going to be in their 30's and out of time!" - In the whole reality of it, we both need to wait a little bit due to life and where we are personally. We are both on board with adding to the family, he has one, I have none but we aren't quite there yet. I am having a lot of struggles with worrying I am running out of time.

My doctor was less than encouraging but sent me to have my tests, AFC was at 6, E2 at 48 and FSH at 6. Everything I read would make me feel i'm still in a good range. The FS told me I should have no trouble if I tried right now but not to wait. So now I can't stop thinking about it yet we still need a bit of time. I suppose I am looking for some inspiration that it really can be a big ol' crap shoot and you just hope and try for the best. I get so upset when the comments are made about "advanced maternal age" and "extremely high risk of downs and miscarriage and you just shouldn't even wait or try" I wind up quietly feeling abused and always end up in tears when I get a moment alone. SO understands but I also don't want to put more pressure on him.

I suppose I just needed a vent, AF is on her way any moment, feel like hell and just at my wits end about to spend a week with family and babies. Hoping that I can be encouraged by you all and hoping that we can pull the goalie a little sooner than later.

Best to you all

 

[Driving280]

Well, Waitandwonder, this may not be what you want to hear. But at 42, you are at the end of your reproductive life. Doctors consider 42 as your last "late reproductive year" and after that is perimenopause for most people. Your hormones are great, so you may be one of those people who gets pregnant at 45 or even later without issues, but chances are still against it. You can look at my siggy - tests are fine for me and apparently my AFC is as high as a 30 year old's, but I've had two miscarriages since starting to try at 40+. If you want a child, now is the time to try. Everything else can be worked out later but you will not get back the years...

 

[dancareoi]

I agree with driving. You will never regret having children but will always regret leaving it too late and not having any .

Good luck

 

[mumoffive]

i lurk these threads and hope you dont mind me butting in, but just wanted to say as the above said, that there isnt really the luxury of time to wait. I had regular cycles and no problem getting pregnant at 43. I feel incredibly lucky to have had my gorgeous girl. I am now 46 and have all the family i want but am now starting to go through the peri-menoupause. It happened so quickly it crept up on me and took me by surprise. Up until 3 months ago my af was like clockwork. I had no indications of the menopause what so ever. Out of the blue, my af just stopped and left me for two months and now comes when it pleases! I know im a few years older than you, but if i had been ttc i would have been devastated as it would have huge implications for ttc. I dont think its prudent to wait to be honest unless of course your circumstances really mean you really cant ttc atm.

 

[waitandwonder]

I appreciate your responses and I hear you loud and clear. I was previously married when I was 29 and was ready to get the baby making going and my ex husband decided at that time he absolutely did NOT want children and scheduled a vasectomy behind my back, told me a week before. I was devastated. I rationalized with myself that I married him because I loved him and not for the children we may or may not have, what if I were not able to even have them? I wouldn't expect him to leave. I accepted the hand that was dealt to me, as my mother always told me "make the best of the life you're given".

As fate would have it, that was just the tip of the iceberg and we divorced after almost 5 years. It took me another 5-6 years to meet my SO and it has been a fantastic two years together (three counting our one year of dancing around as friends). The combination of pain and joy I feel being surrounded by him, his amazing family and his incredible son is hard to express and there is no one I know who understands. My own extended family is basically gone and my opportunity to have had a child is slipping thru my fingers. I feel like the orphan peering into the window of the home of the happy family often times despite the love, acceptance and care they give me.

I pushed my ex husband into proposing because I thought he was just stalling, we had been together for 4+ years and I said enough already, let's do this! He didn't want to marry me. I know my SO loves me and we are happy but I don't want to force his hand. I know he wants more children and he is aware of the age but not sure he fully gets it, especially since I evidently don't fully get it either. Financially we have some big hurdles that we need a hot second to get thru but will get thru and my job is incredibly far from home, my commute is 3 hours round trip a day and we have his son half the week, just things to juggle and sort. So those are not insurmountable hurdles but hurdles nonetheless. I have an IUD so action has to be taken before anything can even start to happen.

Sorry for the long long post. It's been weighing on me heavily and I am constantly looking at the calendar and just becoming more distraught by the reality. I told him after I had gone to the specialist for the assessment that I was ok, that I was just going to pray for the best and not put undue pressure on us, that we both know i'm not getting any younger. That lasted about a day, I can't stop thinking about it and worrying now. I haven't sorted out in my head how to bring it up to him again. Talk about putting the cart before the horse, he hasn't even asked me to marry him for crying out loud. I want a family, I can't/do not want to do this alone.

Thanks again ladies, it's just been a tough one.