Losing my mind

[Chris_25]

Sorry for AF cool I got AF the other day too
Love that was so sweet of hubby!

I am seriously so angry I want to just run and keep running! Yesterday hubby tells me about a friend of ours who we were at a wedding with a couple months ago and she was drunk and comes up to me and was like i'm goin gto go home and have a baby and guess what? Yep shes pregnant! Then I sign into FB this morning and what do you know? Another pregnancy announcement! I'm about to lose my shit I seriously am I sobbed for hours last night. I don't think I could handle this much more. Why is my life so difficult why must I struggle through everything? I've been through a lot growing up and pulled through I just hope I pull through this because I am so depressed it's getting scary.

 

[Chris_25]

Awww... Good hubby!

AF finally left yesterday... First post D&C AF was long. Bleck. DH got Back in town last night but didn't get home till midnight. Super tired this AM.

Glad to hear it's gone! Now it's time to get to it!

 

[Conceive81]

Sorry for AF cool I got AF the other day too
Love that was so sweet of hubby!

I am seriously so angry I want to just run and keep running! Yesterday hubby tells me about a friend of ours who we were at a wedding with a couple months ago and she was drunk and comes up to me and was like i'm goin gto go home and have a baby and guess what? Yep shes pregnant! Then I sign into FB this morning and what do you know? Another pregnancy announcement! I'm about to lose my shit I seriously am I sobbed for hours last night. I don't think I could handle this much more. Why is my life so difficult why must I struggle through everything? I've been through a lot growing up and pulled through I just hope I pull through this because I am so depressed it's getting scary.

Oh honey. I'm sorry, that really sucks. I can relate on going through a lot growing up. I too feel like my life has been one long uphill battle. You have to keep on and never lose hope because the more you go through, the wiser you are.

I know no one can make it better now, but you can pull yourself out of this, and we, everyone if us here, understand how hard this is for you.

 

[Chris_25]

Thank you to top it off I was complaining to my friend and she writes back "did you ever consider adoption?" I went nuts on her and then she kept apologizing.

 

[Conceive81]

Yikes...well, I'm in the same boat as you now. Just got back from my u/s and my follies are doing fine but hubby's SA results came back, the ones they ordered from the more detailed clinic. His volume, count and motility is great but the morphology is not It's at 1% normal...she said it can still be successful but probably more so with IVF...

I'm at a loss for words.

 

[Chris_25]

Yikes...well, I'm in the same boat as you now. Just got back from my u/s and my follies are doing fine but hubby's SA results came back, the ones they ordered from the more detailed clinic. His volume, count and motility is great but the morphology is not It's at 1% normal...she said it can still be successful but probably more so with IVF...

I'm at a loss for words.

Oh I am sorry! hopefully they can do something about that when they do the wash with IUI don't lose hope! My hubby has a 4% morphology.

 

[Conceive81]

Yikes...well, I'm in the same boat as you now. Just got back from my u/s and my follies are doing fine but hubby's SA results came back, the ones they ordered from the more detailed clinic. His volume, count and motility is great but the morphology is not It's at 1% normal...she said it can still be successful but probably more so with IVF...

I'm at a loss for words.

Oh I am sorry! hopefully they can do something about that when they do the wash with IUI don't lose hope! My hubby has a 4% morphology.

I'm still hopeful. I just did some mild research and learned that these days many men have low morphology it seems and that it is definitely over dramatized. His sperm concentration was 322 million and motility at 90...so I think we still have a chance. I just feel like life keeps on throwing a block in my damn road!

 

[Conceive81]

OK Ladies,

I need your help in getting me off the ledge. I'm going to post the results and feel free to chime in. Everything I'm reading says that the 'strict morphology' SA is horseshit.

Volume = 2.0 (reference range >2.0)
Sperm Concentration = 161.4 million (reference range >20 million)
Total Sperm Concentration = 322.7 million (reference range >40 million)
Motility = 90 million (reference range >40 million)
Viscosity = 1 -normal
WBC = 2-4 per hpf (refrence range < 1 million/ml)
Activity = 3 (ref range 1-sluggish, 4 very active)
Progression = 36 (ref range >25%)
PH = 7.6 (ref range 7.2-7.8)

Strict Morphology:

% of Normal = 1 (ref range >14%)
Large = 0
Small = 36
Taper = 7
Amorphous = 28
Duplicate Head = 0
Acrosomal Deficiency = 0
Vacuole = 28
Neck/Midpiece Defect = 0
Cytoplacsmic Mass = 0
Tail defect = 0
Other = 0

Notes:

In the initial testing a small number of immotile cells were present. Many of the motile sperm cells progressed well but some also showed mostly fine Lateral Head Displacement. These findings are reflected in a good 90% motility and a good progression score of 36%. Morphologically only 1% of the sperm cells were normal with the presence of spermatogonia.

It has been our experience that when a majority of the sperm cells show only one or two vacuoles and/or small size, in spite of the abnormal morphology, progression score maybe around normal or above it, as is the case with this patient.


What do you all think? The other thing the RE said was that because of his high count and motility, the 1% doesn't necessarily mean 1%...you have to multiply that factor or something. Urgh. My head hurts. I was really hoping IUI would be our answer

 

[s_love]

Well thats good to know that its over dramatized... probably because men act like such babies when they find out that something is wrong with their peice or little swimmers lol. So lets just keep positive and keep our FXed that this works for you. They didnt give me all the numbers for hubbys last SA, just that it was a lower number, but my dcotor told me it was totally doable.

I swear if anyone deserves a baby, its all of us on this thread. Seriously for all of us it seems like we sometimes take 1 step forward and 2 steps back.

Ok so question, when going in for the IUI... does DH go in with you that morning and give a sample or does he go in before you so that they can do the sperm wash? Hubby asked me and I was like... ya know I never asked about your part.

 

[Conceive81]

Well thats good to know that its over dramatized... probably because men act like such babies when they find out that something is wrong with their peice or little swimmers lol. So lets just keep positive and keep our FXed that this works for you. They didnt give me all the numbers for hubbys last SA, just that it was a lower number, but my dcotor told me it was totally doable.

I swear if anyone deserves a baby, its all of us on this thread. Seriously for all of us it seems like we sometimes take 1 step forward and 2 steps back.

Ok so question, when going in for the IUI... does DH go in with you that morning and give a sample or does he go in before you so that they can do the sperm wash? Hubby asked me and I was like... ya know I never asked about your part.

Good question, when I asked they told me that he could do it at home and bring it in with me and then we wait for the wash...we are just down the street though.

 

[Conceive81]

Thank you to top it off I was complaining to my friend and she writes back "did you ever consider adoption?" I went nuts on her and then she kept apologizing.

Adoption is wonderful but I understand you wanting your own...I would do both if I could, personally.

 

[Chris_25]

OK Ladies,

I need your help in getting me off the ledge. I'm going to post the results and feel free to chime in. Everything I'm reading says that the 'strict morphology' SA is horseshit.

Volume = 2.0 (reference range >2.0)
Sperm Concentration = 161.4 million (reference range >20 million)
Total Sperm Concentration = 322.7 million (reference range >40 million)
Motility = 90 million (reference range >40 million)
Viscosity = 1 -normal
WBC = 2-4 per hpf (refrence range < 1 million/ml)
Activity = 3 (ref range 1-sluggish, 4 very active)
Progression = 36 (ref range >25%)
PH = 7.6 (ref range 7.2-7.8)

Strict Morphology:

% of Normal = 1 (ref range >14%)
Large = 0
Small = 36
Taper = 7
Amorphous = 28
Duplicate Head = 0
Acrosomal Deficiency = 0
Vacuole = 28
Neck/Midpiece Defect = 0
Cytoplacsmic Mass = 0
Tail defect = 0
Other = 0

Notes:

In the initial testing a small number of immotile cells were present. Many of the motile sperm cells progressed well but some also showed mostly fine Lateral Head Displacement. These findings are reflected in a good 90% motility and a good progression score of 36%. Morphologically only 1% of the sperm cells were normal with the presence of spermatogonia.

It has been our experience that when a majority of the sperm cells show only one or two vacuoles and/or small size, in spite of the abnormal morphology, progression score maybe around normal or above it, as is the case with this patient.


What do you all think? The other thing the RE said was that because of his high count and motility, the 1% doesn't necessarily mean 1%...you have to multiply that factor or something. Urgh. My head hurts. I was really hoping IUI would be our answer

Exactly what the doctor told me. My DH had the same exact count on his first SA and they said he had a lot of abnromally shaped sperm but because of the high count it should be fine.

 

[Chris_25]

Thank you to top it off I was complaining to my friend and she writes back "did you ever consider adoption?" I went nuts on her and then she kept apologizing.

Adoption is wonderful but I understand you wanting your own...I would do both if I could, personally.

Of course it is a wonderful thing and i'm not against it by all means. But I just always dreamed of my own and adoption is also a very difficult process as well.

 

[Chris_25]

Well thats good to know that its over dramatized... probably because men act like such babies when they find out that something is wrong with their peice or little swimmers lol. So lets just keep positive and keep our FXed that this works for you. They didnt give me all the numbers for hubbys last SA, just that it was a lower number, but my dcotor told me it was totally doable.

I swear if anyone deserves a baby, its all of us on this thread. Seriously for all of us it seems like we sometimes take 1 step forward and 2 steps back.

Ok so question, when going in for the IUI... does DH go in with you that morning and give a sample or does he go in before you so that they can do the sperm wash? Hubby asked me and I was like... ya know I never asked about your part.

He always went in with me at our appointment time did his thing and then we would wait around an hour for them to do the wash. he can also bring it in with him, but I prefered him to just do it there to not mess anything up because the first time he had a SA done we were fighting the whole way there because he did it at home and I had to hold it in my breasts and I was yelling that he was driving slow. lol it was too stressful.
There was this old woman who worked on the weekend at the desk and the office would be packed and when e walked in she would scream "a=do you have it with you or are you gonig to produce here" hubby hated her. lol

 

[Conceive81]

Well thats good to know that its over dramatized... probably because men act like such babies when they find out that something is wrong with their peice or little swimmers lol. So lets just keep positive and keep our FXed that this works for you. They didnt give me all the numbers for hubbys last SA, just that it was a lower number, but my dcotor told me it was totally doable.

I swear if anyone deserves a baby, its all of us on this thread. Seriously for all of us it seems like we sometimes take 1 step forward and 2 steps back.

Ok so question, when going in for the IUI... does DH go in with you that morning and give a sample or does he go in before you so that they can do the sperm wash? Hubby asked me and I was like... ya know I never asked about your part.

He always went in with me at our appointment time did his thing and then we would wait around an hour for them to do the wash. he can also bring it in with him, but I prefered him to just do it there to not mess anything up because the first time he had a SA done we were fighting the whole way there because he did it at home and I had to hold it in my breasts and I was yelling that he was driving slow. lol it was too stressful.
There was this old woman who worked on the weekend at the desk and the office would be packed and when e walked in she would scream "a=do you have it with you or are you gonig to produce here" hubby hated her. lol

LMAO, I just pictured that whole scene!!! HAHAHA....wow, that lady must have been quite the turn on..if the plastic cup wasn't doing it for him....

 

[Chris_25]

lmao! Yea, she was like 80 years old and would scream it and then say ok you can go down now. Poor guy

 

[Conceive81]

lmao! Yea, she was like 80 years old and would scream it and then say ok you can go down now. Poor guy

Wow. That's right up there with the 80's bush porn on VHS.

 

[Conceive81]

OK Ladies,

I need your help in getting me off the ledge. I'm going to post the results and feel free to chime in. Everything I'm reading says that the 'strict morphology' SA is horseshit.

Volume = 2.0 (reference range >2.0)
Sperm Concentration = 161.4 million (reference range >20 million)
Total Sperm Concentration = 322.7 million (reference range >40 million)
Motility = 90 million (reference range >40 million)
Viscosity = 1 -normal
WBC = 2-4 per hpf (refrence range < 1 million/ml)
Activity = 3 (ref range 1-sluggish, 4 very active)
Progression = 36 (ref range >25%)
PH = 7.6 (ref range 7.2-7.8)

Strict Morphology:

% of Normal = 1 (ref range >14%)
Large = 0
Small = 36
Taper = 7
Amorphous = 28
Duplicate Head = 0
Acrosomal Deficiency = 0
Vacuole = 28
Neck/Midpiece Defect = 0
Cytoplacsmic Mass = 0
Tail defect = 0
Other = 0

Notes:

In the initial testing a small number of immotile cells were present. Many of the motile sperm cells progressed well but some also showed mostly fine Lateral Head Displacement. These findings are reflected in a good 90% motility and a good progression score of 36%. Morphologically only 1% of the sperm cells were normal with the presence of spermatogonia.

It has been our experience that when a majority of the sperm cells show only one or two vacuoles and/or small size, in spite of the abnormal morphology, progression score maybe around normal or above it, as is the case with this patient.


What do you all think? The other thing the RE said was that because of his high count and motility, the 1% doesn't necessarily mean 1%...you have to multiply that factor or something. Urgh. My head hurts. I was really hoping IUI would be our answer

Exactly what the doctor told me. My DH had the same exact count on his first SA and they said he had a lot of abnromally shaped sperm but because of the high count it should be fine.

Do you remember if it was a 'strict morphology' test? Do you remember what the number was for the normal morphology?

 

[Chris_25]

lmao! Yea, she was like 80 years old and would scream it and then say ok you can go down now. Poor guy

Wow. That's right up there with the 80's bush porn on VHS.

LMFAO! It was kind of embarassing for me because then I would have to sit there in a packed room after she told him to go downstairs and everyone knowing where he went lol even though everyone there was for the same reason.

 

[Chris_25]

OK Ladies,

I need your help in getting me off the ledge. I'm going to post the results and feel free to chime in. Everything I'm reading says that the 'strict morphology' SA is horseshit.

Volume = 2.0 (reference range >2.0)
Sperm Concentration = 161.4 million (reference range >20 million)
Total Sperm Concentration = 322.7 million (reference range >40 million)
Motility = 90 million (reference range >40 million)
Viscosity = 1 -normal
WBC = 2-4 per hpf (refrence range < 1 million/ml)
Activity = 3 (ref range 1-sluggish, 4 very active)
Progression = 36 (ref range >25%)
PH = 7.6 (ref range 7.2-7.8)

Strict Morphology:

% of Normal = 1 (ref range >14%)
Large = 0
Small = 36
Taper = 7
Amorphous = 28
Duplicate Head = 0
Acrosomal Deficiency = 0
Vacuole = 28
Neck/Midpiece Defect = 0
Cytoplacsmic Mass = 0
Tail defect = 0
Other = 0

Notes:

In the initial testing a small number of immotile cells were present. Many of the motile sperm cells progressed well but some also showed mostly fine Lateral Head Displacement. These findings are reflected in a good 90% motility and a good progression score of 36%. Morphologically only 1% of the sperm cells were normal with the presence of spermatogonia.

It has been our experience that when a majority of the sperm cells show only one or two vacuoles and/or small size, in spite of the abnormal morphology, progression score maybe around normal or above it, as is the case with this patient.


What do you all think? The other thing the RE said was that because of his high count and motility, the 1% doesn't necessarily mean 1%...you have to multiply that factor or something. Urgh. My head hurts. I was really hoping IUI would be our answer

Exactly what the doctor told me. My DH had the same exact count on his first SA and they said he had a lot of abnromally shaped sperm but because of the high count it should be fine.

Do you remember if it was a 'strict morphology' test? Do you remember what the number was for the normal morphology?

The strict WHO morphology was 4% which was low normal