bloodbinds
Pip
- Joined
- Mar 2, 2009
- Messages
- 6,379
- Reaction score
- 0
Some people may have heard me tell this story before, but i'm telling it again because i have just had a new found sense of hope and am feeling really positive for the first time in months, about possibly finding love 
I met Adam when i was 16. My sister and her boyfriend moved in with him and they were all really good mates. I saw him over at her house and we would chat casually and he came over to our house at christmas. He was always nice and good looking, but he was 10 years older than me, so i never really thought of him as anything other than my sisters mate, because i never in a million years thought he would be interested in me.
Then one night i had a row with my mother, and stormed out the house and went to my sisters to have a good cry. She told me i could spend the night and let me sleep on the pull out bed in the living room. That night i was woken by Adam getting into my bed. He kissed me and told me he had always liked me and he thought i was amazing. I was pretty shocked to say the least. He left and told me to come back over tomorrow so we could talk.
So i went back and we talked. He told me how he had liked me from the moment he saw me, how he loved that i was always life of the party, that i was wild and free and didn't care what anyone thought. He was smitten with me and wanted me to feel the same. I was honest, that i hadn't thought of him like that, but yes, i was attracted to him, maybe we could see what would happen? My sister walked in on us chatting and went mad. She took me back to my house and told me i couldn't see Adam. That i was still just a kid and he was a man and her best friend. It was a can of worms she didn't want opening. And i understood, he was a lot older than me, and if things didn't work out (which they probably wouldnt at that age) then it would make things major awkward for her, and i didn't want that. I agreed not to see Adam again.
Over the next two years me and Adam would see each other at house parties, and out in town (i got fake I.D and managed to go clubbing quite a lot under age) and when ever we saw each other we would flirt and kiss secretly and whisper sweet nothings into each others ears! We started to really fall for each other. And though many times i wanted to say 'sod it' to my sister and be with him, he didn't want to ruin their friendship.
When i hit 18, my sister, who knew me and Ad still had a 'thing' for each other, told me that if i wanted to, i was welcome to do something about it. At the time though, i had a boyfriend, so nothing happened.
Adam sent me a letter telling me how much he still felt for me and that he would wait for me, until we could be together.
The next year i was single, and sought out Adam, to find he had a girlfriend! (So much for waiting!!) He told me he would leave her for the chance to be with me, but i told him no, that he couldn't do it and it wasn't fair. I was beginning to have doubts about us anyway, after all, i was a wild and exciting 19 year old who broke many hearts. I didn't want to break Adams, he who wanted to settle down, where as i just wanted to have fun. Maybe it wasn't the right time for us?
Little did i know that that year i was to fall pregnant with my boyfriend who i had only been with for 3 months, i moved away to be with him. After my 6 month of pregnancy i left my FOB and went back home, where Adam was one of the first to greet me. 'Come out with me' he said. And i did. With a goodnight kiss at the end of the night, Adam asked for more. 'I want to be with you' he told me.
Sadly, i told him i was so messed up. Not sure whether i still loved FOB, and facing a life as a single mother, still crying on the nights that i was alone. It wasn't right. The timing was all wrong.
We went out a few more times, and discussed being together. But i told him it wasn't fair for him to be with me when i wasn't sure what i wanted, or if i was still in love with FOB. He understood. I told him i would tell him when i was less messed up.
Bella was born in november, and at the end of december i decided to pursue Adam, in hope he would be patient with me, i wasn't quite ready for a relationship, but i didn't want to lose him, he couldn't wait forever.
So at my request, my sister invited a few people over to hers, including Adam. After spending the night flirting with him and batting my eyelashes, he takes me aside. Sadly, he looks at me and says 'I'm seeing someone else. I think i love her'
I felt my heart break in two. Someone else? Love?
Adam had had girlfriends before, while i had boyfriends and while i didn't. But he would always say 'I don't feel for them as much as i feel for you'. So to hear he was in love? Confused and upset me.
In January i told him (in a drunken state) that i loved him. Again he rejected me, telling me he loved his girlfriend. That he couldn't entertain the thought of being with me, when he loved her so much.
From then i have kept my distance. Getting updates from my sister about how 'in love' they are.
But last weekend i heard my sister talking to her hubby, about how Adam doesn't seem that happy anymore, and how possesive his girlfriend seems. I have a renewed sense of hope.
It's Bella's christening this weekend where i will see him again. Though his girlfriend is also invited
But i just have this over whelming sense that we are meant to be together, and that eventually, we will be together. His girlfriend is just keeping him warm for me. I know that is such an awful thing to say, and if she makes him happy then yes, i want him to be happy. But if there is any chance they are not happy? If there is any chance we might be able to be together? I would jump at the chance!
I just want him so badly... every time i think of the perfect guy, or the guy i want to be with, i think of him! No other guy seems to hold a candle to him. I would be so good for him, i just know it! I know how well i would treat him, and i know i would get treated like a princess in return. I honestly think we are meant to be together. I just wish it was sooner rather than later!!
Sorry for the verrrry long story, and congrats if you managed to read all of it! Just feeling so loved up even if i haven't got him (yet!)
I met Adam when i was 16. My sister and her boyfriend moved in with him and they were all really good mates. I saw him over at her house and we would chat casually and he came over to our house at christmas. He was always nice and good looking, but he was 10 years older than me, so i never really thought of him as anything other than my sisters mate, because i never in a million years thought he would be interested in me.
Then one night i had a row with my mother, and stormed out the house and went to my sisters to have a good cry. She told me i could spend the night and let me sleep on the pull out bed in the living room. That night i was woken by Adam getting into my bed. He kissed me and told me he had always liked me and he thought i was amazing. I was pretty shocked to say the least. He left and told me to come back over tomorrow so we could talk.
So i went back and we talked. He told me how he had liked me from the moment he saw me, how he loved that i was always life of the party, that i was wild and free and didn't care what anyone thought. He was smitten with me and wanted me to feel the same. I was honest, that i hadn't thought of him like that, but yes, i was attracted to him, maybe we could see what would happen? My sister walked in on us chatting and went mad. She took me back to my house and told me i couldn't see Adam. That i was still just a kid and he was a man and her best friend. It was a can of worms she didn't want opening. And i understood, he was a lot older than me, and if things didn't work out (which they probably wouldnt at that age) then it would make things major awkward for her, and i didn't want that. I agreed not to see Adam again.
Over the next two years me and Adam would see each other at house parties, and out in town (i got fake I.D and managed to go clubbing quite a lot under age) and when ever we saw each other we would flirt and kiss secretly and whisper sweet nothings into each others ears! We started to really fall for each other. And though many times i wanted to say 'sod it' to my sister and be with him, he didn't want to ruin their friendship.
When i hit 18, my sister, who knew me and Ad still had a 'thing' for each other, told me that if i wanted to, i was welcome to do something about it. At the time though, i had a boyfriend, so nothing happened.
Adam sent me a letter telling me how much he still felt for me and that he would wait for me, until we could be together.
The next year i was single, and sought out Adam, to find he had a girlfriend! (So much for waiting!!) He told me he would leave her for the chance to be with me, but i told him no, that he couldn't do it and it wasn't fair. I was beginning to have doubts about us anyway, after all, i was a wild and exciting 19 year old who broke many hearts. I didn't want to break Adams, he who wanted to settle down, where as i just wanted to have fun. Maybe it wasn't the right time for us?
Little did i know that that year i was to fall pregnant with my boyfriend who i had only been with for 3 months, i moved away to be with him. After my 6 month of pregnancy i left my FOB and went back home, where Adam was one of the first to greet me. 'Come out with me' he said. And i did. With a goodnight kiss at the end of the night, Adam asked for more. 'I want to be with you' he told me.
Sadly, i told him i was so messed up. Not sure whether i still loved FOB, and facing a life as a single mother, still crying on the nights that i was alone. It wasn't right. The timing was all wrong.
We went out a few more times, and discussed being together. But i told him it wasn't fair for him to be with me when i wasn't sure what i wanted, or if i was still in love with FOB. He understood. I told him i would tell him when i was less messed up.
Bella was born in november, and at the end of december i decided to pursue Adam, in hope he would be patient with me, i wasn't quite ready for a relationship, but i didn't want to lose him, he couldn't wait forever.
So at my request, my sister invited a few people over to hers, including Adam. After spending the night flirting with him and batting my eyelashes, he takes me aside. Sadly, he looks at me and says 'I'm seeing someone else. I think i love her'
I felt my heart break in two. Someone else? Love?
Adam had had girlfriends before, while i had boyfriends and while i didn't. But he would always say 'I don't feel for them as much as i feel for you'. So to hear he was in love? Confused and upset me.
In January i told him (in a drunken state) that i loved him. Again he rejected me, telling me he loved his girlfriend. That he couldn't entertain the thought of being with me, when he loved her so much.
From then i have kept my distance. Getting updates from my sister about how 'in love' they are.
But last weekend i heard my sister talking to her hubby, about how Adam doesn't seem that happy anymore, and how possesive his girlfriend seems. I have a renewed sense of hope.It's Bella's christening this weekend where i will see him again. Though his girlfriend is also invited
But i just have this over whelming sense that we are meant to be together, and that eventually, we will be together. His girlfriend is just keeping him warm for me. I know that is such an awful thing to say, and if she makes him happy then yes, i want him to be happy. But if there is any chance they are not happy? If there is any chance we might be able to be together? I would jump at the chance!
I just want him so badly... every time i think of the perfect guy, or the guy i want to be with, i think of him! No other guy seems to hold a candle to him. I would be so good for him, i just know it! I know how well i would treat him, and i know i would get treated like a princess in return. I honestly think we are meant to be together. I just wish it was sooner rather than later!!
Sorry for the verrrry long story, and congrats if you managed to read all of it! Just feeling so loved up even if i haven't got him (yet!)
I bet it feels nice knowing there is still hope for love. I've given up completely but maybe I'll be surprised x
