Lotte-I can't imagine how painful it is to have to anticipate Tuesday, but I think to treat it like any birth would be completely justified and would possibly give you more peace. You may want to surround yourself with supportive family or friends, even a photographer afterwards to remember your sweet son. I hope this comment isn't out of place, as I can't imagine how you must feel. The deepest sympathy for you this day. I cried my entire way to church this morning thinking of you an ocean away.