Need opinions please...

[LennaG]

Im 24+ weeks pregnant and have been struggling my whole pregnancy with this..


So Had sex every weekend in March with my Ex. We broke up end of march. Had one night stand with a guy on April 2nd or 3rd. Got positive pregnancy test on April 7th. Got positive urine test at clinic (Very faint) on April 8th.

Also, first U/S at 7 weeks said Due Date Dec 18th. Dating scan at 12+ weeks said due date of Dec 13th (5 Days earlier).

I know there is no way to know 100% without DNA testing, just want to know who is most likely the father and when I conceived. Also, don't know when my LMP was.

Im just struggling with this..I know its likely to be my exs, but what are the chances its the guy from the 1 night stand? Its been stressing me out

 

[Ally2015]

Im 24+ weeks pregnant and have been struggling my whole pregnancy with this..


So Had sex every weekend in March with my Ex. We broke up end of march. Had one night stand with a guy on April 2nd or 3rd. Got positive pregnancy test on April 7th. Got positive urine test at clinic (Very faint) on April 8th.

Also, first U/S at 7 weeks said Due Date Dec 18th. Dating scan at 12+ weeks said due date of Dec 13th (5 Days earlier).

I know there is no way to know 100% without DNA testing, just want to know who is most likely the father and when I conceived. Also, don't know when my LMP was.

Im just struggling with this..I know its likely to be my exs, but what are the chances its the guy from the 1 night stand? Its been stressing me out

i think ex, as you got pos preg test on april 7th, which was only a few days after you had one night stand. You would be in your luteal phase then, so wouldn't be able to get pregnant.

 

[LennaG]

Im 24+ weeks pregnant and have been struggling my whole pregnancy with this..


So Had sex every weekend in March with my Ex. We broke up end of march. Had one night stand with a guy on April 2nd or 3rd. Got positive pregnancy test on April 7th. Got positive urine test at clinic (Very faint) on April 8th.

Also, first U/S at 7 weeks said Due Date Dec 18th. Dating scan at 12+ weeks said due date of Dec 13th (5 Days earlier).

I know there is no way to know 100% without DNA testing, just want to know who is most likely the father and when I conceived. Also, don't know when my LMP was.

Im just struggling with this..I know its likely to be my exs, but what are the chances its the guy from the 1 night stand? Its been stressing me out

i think ex, as you got pos preg test on april 7th, which was only a few days after you had one night stand. You would be in your luteal phase then, so wouldn't be able to get pregnant.

Whats my luteal phase??

Also, does it matter that I took clear blue digital and first response tests? Since they can detect earlier (or so they say). The one at the clinic was just a normal pee test, not sure about sensitivity tho

 

[Ally2015]

so basically, u have a fertile window, which is when you can get pregnant, this is around the time you release your egg. After the egg is released if it;s fertilised then that will become your baby, if not, you will have your period.
so say you have a 28 cycle, and you ovulate (release egg) on day 14, you can only get pregnant the few days before and on the 14th day. After that the egg is gone and you can't get pregnant. So you could have unprotected sex and not get pregnant. The next 14 days of the 28 day cycle- are your luteal phase. after which you have your period (or not if pregnant) and the cycle starts again.

So if you got a positive test on 7th april, and had a one night stand on 2/3rd, you would be in the second part of your cycle where you can't get pregnant. Does that make any sense??

so i think its the ex's baby, just based on that.

 

[Ally2015]

no the type of test wont matter x

 

[LennaG]

so basically, u have a fertile window, which is when you can get pregnant, this is around the time you release your egg. After the egg is released if it;s fertilised then that will become your baby, if not, you will have your period.
so say you have a 28 cycle, and you ovulate (release egg) on day 14, you can only get pregnant the few days before and on the 14th day. After that the egg is gone and you can't get pregnant. So you could have unprotected sex and not get pregnant. The next 14 days of the 28 day cycle- are your luteal phase. after which you have your period (or not if pregnant) and the cycle starts again.

So if you got a positive test on 7th april, and had a one night stand on 2/3rd, you would be in the second part of your cycle where you can't get pregnant. Does that make any sense??

so i think its the ex's baby, just based on that.

My periods can be irregular tho sometimes

 

[Ally2015]

so basically, u have a fertile window, which is when you can get pregnant, this is around the time you release your egg. After the egg is released if it;s fertilised then that will become your baby, if not, you will have your period.
so say you have a 28 cycle, and you ovulate (release egg) on day 14, you can only get pregnant the few days before and on the 14th day. After that the egg is gone and you can't get pregnant. So you could have unprotected sex and not get pregnant. The next 14 days of the 28 day cycle- are your luteal phase. after which you have your period (or not if pregnant) and the cycle starts again.

So if you got a positive test on 7th april, and had a one night stand on 2/3rd, you would be in the second part of your cycle where you can't get pregnant. Does that make any sense??

so i think its the ex's baby, just based on that.

My periods can be irregular tho sometimes

yeah thats still ok, if you had unprotected sex a few days before you got your positive test, it's very likely you will be in your luteal phase and the egg will already have been fertilised and implanted onto your uterus wall. so it would be the ex's baby i believe. x

but of course genetic testing is the only way to know 100%

 

[alyssa.s]

I think the ex as well. Usually it takes atleast 14 days after your ovulation to get a positive pregnancy test, especially at the hospital as they test for high levels of hcg to avoid false positives.

 

[AliJo]

Another thing to consider is implantation. Implantation won't occur for 6-12 days most commonly around 9 or 10 days. It takes another 48 to 72 hours for HCG levels to reach detectable levels. So based on that alone it's your ex's and to reassure yourself you should do DNA. I honestly don't have any doubt that is your ex's.

Irregular periods wouldn't mess with implantation.

You seem pretty against the idea of it being your ex's. You may have some good reasons for it which is no one's business. It's a good thing to know who the father is, though. That way the baby has health history on both sides that doctors can look at throughout it's life.

Best of luck!

 

[Amygdala]

Lenna, I think this is your third thread about this? How come you're still this anxious about it? Everyone agrees that there's pretty much no way it's not your ex's. Maybe asking your doctor the same question would help you be less anxious about it?

 

[Moom7900]

I agree that it would be very unlikely for baby to NOT be your ex's. Your positive pg tests were too close to the one night stand for him to be the father. As everyone else has said, the only way to have conclusive proof is a DNA test, but I am also sure that your ex is the father xxxxxx

 

[Isme]

The baby is definitely your ex's. There is no way you would have conceived from the one-night-stand according to that timeline. It doesn't matter what your cycle is like, it just wouldn't be possible.

 

[gina236]

Okay I'm going to take a different approach to showing you almost 100% it's your ex's. Let's say you had sex with the one night stand guy on April 2nd. For him to be the father that means you would have ovulated around then. Absolute most you could have been is 1 day past ovulation to get pregnant (which is rare to conceive at 1dpo but for arguments sake let's say you were since eggs can live 24 hours after ovulation). So if that were the case the bfp came on the 7th, making that 6 dpo. The chances of getting a bfp at 6 dpo are only 15.4% according to countdowntopregnancy! That is an extremely low percentage and would be an extremely low hcg level, resulting in a super faint positive. The fact you got a positive at the doctor the next day means your hcg was likely over 50-100 (which would be an extremely high number for 7 dpo, most have not even implanted by then). I think it is safe to say it is most definitely your ex's. Always go by the saying "you are more likely to be the rule, not the exception" obviously a DNA test is the only way to know for sure but I think it's pretty safe to assume it is your ex's. Hope this made sense.

 

[LennaG]

I'm just one of those people who doesn't like the unknown. It makes me very anxious and stressed. I know there's no way to be 100% without DNA testing, but like I said, that isn't an option for me. So it just stresses me out.

 

[LennaG]

I am really hoping and praying it's my ex's.

 

[LennaG]

Also when I went to the clinic they took a urine sample and I think dipped a strip in it and they said it barely turned blue (positive)

 

[LennaG]

Also my period from February started on like the 12th or 13th....I don't remember when I got it in march, as my periods don't come very consistent every month sometimes a week earlier or later my guess is I started my period between March 9th-14th...

 

[Isme]

Also when I went to the clinic they took a urine sample and I think dipped a strip in it and they said it barely turned blue (positive)

Well I went to see the midwife at 4w6d and she said my test was so faint that she was sure I'd be getting my period soon. I'd taken 2 tests shortly before going that had very bright lines and when she ran a test to check my HCG that afternoon it was 664... So either her tests were crap (which I've heard from a lot of ladies about the tests at their offices) or her eyes are crap. But since she had the nurse help read the results, I'm guessing it was the former.

The point is, given all the information, it is very (very) unlikely to be anyone but your ex's baby. Positives at even 6-7 DPO are incredibly rare, and I think that in many of the cases where that does happen... the woman has simply miscalculated her dates at best (sometimes ovulation surprises you a bit early) or at worst there is an issue like an ectopic implantation. In your case, you would be looking at getting a positive at 4-5DPO if your one-night-stand guy was the father... and that's simply just not possible.

I can't tell you what to do... Though I'm not really sure why a DNA test wouldn't be on the table. But if I were in your shoes (and couldn't test), I would try to put it out of your head until the baby gets here. Quite often newborns bear a strong resemblance to their biological fathers-- even if they later end up looking like their mothers-- so you may be able to set your mind at ease once you see your baby's face. Hopefully both men look sufficiently different from each other.

 

[LennaG]

Also when I went to the clinic they took a urine sample and I think dipped a strip in it and they said it barely turned blue (positive)

Well I went to see the midwife at 4w6d and she said my test was so faint that she was sure I'd be getting my period soon. I'd taken 2 tests shortly before going that had very bright lines and when she ran a test to check my HCG that afternoon it was 664... So either her tests were crap (which I've heard from a lot of ladies about the tests at their offices) or her eyes are crap. But since she had the nurse help read the results, I'm guessing it was the former.

The point is, given all the information, it is very (very) unlikely to be anyone but your ex's baby. Positives at even 6-7 DPO are incredibly rare, and I think that in many of the cases where that does happen... the woman has simply miscalculated her dates at best (sometimes ovulation surprises you a bit early) or at worst there is an issue like an ectopic implantation. In your case, you would be looking at getting a positive at 4-5DPO if your one-night-stand guy was the father... and that's simply just not possible.

I can't tell you what to do... Though I'm not really sure why a DNA test wouldn't be on the table. But if I were in your shoes (and couldn't test), I would try to put it out of your head until the baby gets here. Quite often newborns bear a strong resemblance to their biological fathers-- even if they later end up looking like their mothers-- so you may be able to set your mind at ease once you see your baby's face. Hopefully both men look sufficiently different from each other.

Well the one night stand was african american...all my family believe my baby belongs to me Ex, as they don't know about the one night stand. As guess thats why I have so much anxiety because if the baby comes out a different color, Im going to be so embarrassed because Im going to have to explain how my ex basically forced and manipulated me into sleeping with his friend (the one night stand) and this pregnancy has already been a lot on me and my family and I really don't need that.

Yes, I did say that my ex and I were broken up at that point where I slept with his friend, but it isn't true, I just didn't want to be judged. We were at a party and I was clearly intoxicated and my ex wanted his friend to get some action, even tho I had told him before I wasn't comfortable with this. However, a few drinks later he basically manipulated me, saying if I didn't do it, that it meant I didn't care about him or his friends and that I was selfish. So then you know what happened next. I have a lot of guilt about this and regret and honestly don't want to have to explain to my family if the baby does in fact come out a darker color.

 

[Isme]

Oh wow. That would be tough. I'm sorry that your dealing with this. I really think you're safe, though. I truly do.

However, if things turn out the other way, it will still be okay. There are worse situations to be in. If the truth were to come out, your ex should be embarrassed. Not you. Your family would get over it too.

Obviously I very much doubt that would even be an issue. This baby is your ex's. Of course, other than the initial embarrassment, that honestly doesn't sound like a preferable scenario. He seems like a jerk.

I hope it all turns out well for you. At least you will have your sweet baby in the end.