Not being able to post BFP

[calm]

Not my case, as I am WTT, and I am not likely to be posting such a thing for a while.

Okay, I do understand the reason, the reason being many people can get upset because they have not had their BFP, and they are getting frustrated, upset etc, especially when having TTC for a long time, I get this!

But on the other hand, if you are sharing everything with a certain group of people, who you know, who knows everything about you trying to TTC, it seems natural that you want to tell them there, and not go into a different section.

I mean, I often follow up a story on TTC, or even here on WTT like with cinnamum, and then think, should I be going to "BFP announcements" to hear the end of the story? Its like reading a book and the last page not being there, or the last page is in a different book.

May seem strange what I say, and please don't get me wrong that I don't understand the reason why people don't want BFP in this section, just wonder is anyone feels like I do.

 

[alice&bump]

just go to bfp announcements, its not hard.

 

[calm]

just go to bfp announcements, its not hard.

Never thought of that one Thank you

 

[bigbloomerz]

The main reason is because its offensive to other people using WTT, who maybe have 2 or 3 years to wait, or just arent in a position to start TTC due to circumstances, so its a bit like rubbing their noses in it.
Even if you are happy for the person who got their BFP its still a reminder, if people want to see it then they just go over to BFP announcements and comment on it there.
xx

 

[kintenda]

If someone has a story like that on here maybe you could click onto their username & then search for their other posts? Stops you having to look all the way thru new posts in bfp announcements!

 

[calm]

I was thinking more of BFP in the TTC section.

I am one for following the rules, if it says don't post a BFP, I would not. I would hate to make anyone upset.

I do see though that many a people don't, and just continue to go on with the story (which I suppose I personally prefer).

Personally the day that seeing a BFP upsets me, I will not read the forum, as this means I really need to get it together. (As I say, this is me and my circumstances)

 

[alice&bump]

i think you're walking on very thin ice here. there are many reasons people areWTT, a lot of them are very complicated and arent just a case of "i need to finish uni/i need to save up". those poeple are on here for support and dont want things flaunting in their face. one would assume that yes they're happy for their friends that get their BFP, but there are times when they really dont want to see it, hence avoid TTC and BFP announcements.

therre arent that many posts in BFP announcements in a day, its not hard to look.

 

[calm]

Yes, I do know about complicated reasons, WISH I didn't.

But I was talking more about TTC I suppose.

However, no-one get upset, as I was just voicing an opinion, come the day I am not going to break any rules.

Editing a few typos

 

[Sparky0207]

I understand what you are saying Calm and think you are getting your head bitten off by some people tbh!

I think I see what you are saying, do people carry on their story in that section or leave their story unfinished and go to BFP announcements? My personal opinion is if people are following a particular story and are checking that story to see if the person has got a bfp then I dont see the harm in posting it on their original story. I would see the problem if they made a huge deal about it like changing the thread title etc in a section other than bfp announcements. Thats only my opinion though

 

[calm]

I understand what you are saying Calm and think you are getting your head bitten off by some people tbh!

I think I see what you are saying, do people carry on their story in that section or leave their story unfinished and go to BFP announcements? My personal opinion is if people are following a particular story and are checking that story to see if the person has got a bfp then I dont see the harm in posting it on their original story. I would see the problem if they made a huge deal about it like changing the thread title etc in a section other than bfp announcements. Thats only my opinion though

Thank you, I do feel this way about the bitten bit, I actually feel really upset about it,wished I had never posted, and, wanna cry

Would be grateful if anyone left the subject alone. Didnt mean any harm.

 

[alice&bump]

Yes, I do know about complicated reasons, WISH I didn't.

But I was talking more about TTC I suppose.

However, no-one get upset, as I was just voicing an opinion, come the day I am not going to break any rules.

Editing a few typos

people are going to get upset unfortuantely, it's a very touchy subject. i know people have opinons and i understand we live in a country of free speech, but i've seen a few posts from you along these lines and tbh i think you know full well the rules regarding this and the reasons why these exist.

 

[lozzy21]

I understand what you mean calm, its the same reason as why there is no bfp anocment in here, some people have been ttc for years and nothing's happen. As for following people's story you can post bfp anouncments in your journal so its all in the one place.

 

[Gwizz]

for Calm

xxx

 

[DragonMummy]

I agree with Sparky. I think it was a perfectly reasonable question and something I had wondered myself. I don't think there was any need for the attitude at all!!!

I do agree that if you have had lots of people following your story it would be nice to tell them directly in the forum you have been writing in - however a lot of people manage to post their BFP's in there - mainly by putting it at the bottom of another post or by making a thread of 'I think I have a BFP but I am not sure' - so there are ways round it without being insensitive.

And frankly if people find it 'offensive' - people posting a BFP on a trying to conceive forum, are they not in the wrong place? Yeah we all get a bit downhearted when the BFP happens to someone else but if people started pansying around me trying to protect my feelings and hide it all from me I think that would make me feel worse!!

 

[Sparky0207]

^^ agreed.

for Calm

 

[Pyrrhic]

And frankly if people find it 'offensive' - people posting a BFP on a trying to conceive forum, are they not in the wrong place? Yeah we all get a bit downhearted when the BFP happens to someone else but if people started pansying around me trying to protect my feelings and hide it all from me I think that would make me feel worse!!

No, they aren't, and to say something like that you obviously haven't been on this forum for very long. That is a very hurtful thing to say.

No one is trying to hide things at all. This works in several ways.

1. Keeps TTC separate for just that trying to conceive not pregnancy related topics. If you get a BFP, you are pregnant. BFP announcements bridges the gap between the two. TTC was getting flooded with BFP announcements, and pushing actual topics off the board. Not fair to TTCers.

2. BFP announcements forum moves slowly, so your post will be present for awhile for people to see and not get bumped to the next page like it would on TTC.

3. You can add your BFP to your sig, so all your old posts will have it as an announcement if you really think no one will notice in the announcements forum.

 

[Serene123]

They wouldn't make a big change like BFP announcements unless it was necessary. I know alot of thought goes into new sections etc.. But of course, if you're wondering you should ask! xxx

 

[Wobbles]

Or people could just not question it and follow the guidelines of BabyandBump realising there must be a reason ... a GOOD one.

You can post in your journals you can post in the BFP section ...whats the point of a BFP announcement section if people don't post them in there anyway.

Theres almost a section for everything on BnB so people don't get upset and the plus side of the announcements section is your GREAT news doesn't get lost.

Like pointed out there are many reasons why people are WTT some of those reasons are pretty sensitive and we'd rather make everyone comfy and to do so we found over time this was the best way.

WTT isn't any different to TTC so why should it be different rules?

 

[Wobbles]

And frankly if people find it 'offensive' - people posting a BFP on a trying to conceive forum, are they not in the wrong place? Yeah we all get a bit downhearted when the BFP happens to someone else but if people started pansying around me trying to protect my feelings and hide it all from me I think that would make me feel worse!!

Frankly NO they are not. Again we have sections to post these announcements - is it hard to ask for a bit of respect not shove people off the forum who may be a lil more sensitive to these than you are.

We haven't asked you to pansey around we've asked people to respect that and post them in the relevant sections. Not hard is it really!

 

[tasha41]

I think if you want to post a BFP in here or in TTC you should keep it to your journal. If you haven't got a journal but want to tell your friends, do it in a PM. I realize a lot of people who are TTC and WTT don't check out the BFP section, so I think sending the people you're close with a message is appropriate... so they don't wonder where you've up and left to.

The rest who are curious can look up your profile --> most people add a ticker to their signature or something about their pregnancy which can be seen on your profile. They also change their "family status" to expecting from waiting to try/TTC... so the curious could find out that way as well