ok so who wants to get pregnant in 2011? (closed group)

[NDH]

WSS ^

I couldn't have put it better myself Dew.

Nikki - I believe you can work through this.

 

[nypage1981]

But it isn't the smoking, or whether he quits or not, its the lying....i just picture different instances where he was so mad that I could dream of accusing him, the most "honest person ever" of smoking, while he turned the fight against me, and stop being crazy, blah blah blah...and those instances, he either had just smoked, or left, and had a cigarette. Its being deceived that im stuck on. It isn't because he is a smoker that im so sad about, its being lied to by the one person I really thought wouldn't ever want to lie to me. I wouldnt do that to him, so it makes me sad that he did it so easily to me

The house has been enough tension on this relationship, now something has happened with his family, and then THIS - him lying for the past 7 months every single day. i just dont know how much more I can take, if any

 

[Dew]

NY: I am so sorry that you are in such turmoil. I don't know why men lie to their wives about certain things I too don't feel the need to lie to DH about anything but there were times when I regretted telling him the truth because he failed to understand and made an unnecessary argument

I still hope you both can find a common ground and bury your differences for the sake of the baby. Your situation makes me sad

 

[Huggles]

big big hugs ny

 

[MummyCat]

Trust is the biggest part of a relationship... I'm hoping that you can work through this and discuss the problems, at least so he can understand why you're so upset. Perhaps he'll then realise and try make things better???

Thinking of you Nikki!

 

[babyhopes2323]

Thank you so much ladies for all your support !!! BIG to all of you.. xxx

Mummy thanks for sending me that link, he is absolutely gorgeous !!! xxx well she has gained weight and im happy about that, although the doctors say dont look at the weight as the only factor, she can gain weight outside as well even if she is born with less weight so dont concentrate purely on the weight and the scan measurements, they said, that the longer we leave her in, the better purely from the lung maturity point of view.. i will still be getting the steroid shot apparently, although mummy, like you said 4 weeks would be brilliant if she stays in, but even they dopnt see that happening, i think they may draw the line at 34 weeks for me, but hey like you all said, 34 is better than 32. shes been active this morning too after a bit of worry last night from no movement, so im happy about that !

thank you all once again for being so supportive, i really dont know what i wouldve done without all of you !! x i me the woman from my antenatal class for dinner, shes from NZ, and will be delivering around the 24th of september, and by that time, im sure id have had my baby and would be lodging in the hospital as a guest rather than a patient, she and another woman who is due around the same date as her would be delivering at the same hospital, so it would be nice to see them, although, i feel kind of bad that i wont be getting the normal delivery like them, and when they say that their baby is head down etc etc, i feel kind of bad for myself, but in my situation, id go through anything just to have my baby healthy at home with me soon. xxx

Ny BIG to you, i couldnt have put it better than dew like ndh says.. im praying things work out for you soon with OH. xxx

 

[nypage1981]

Thanks ladies. Time is actually helping this situation. As the date go by I'm slowly letting him back in and we are getting there. I will still probably razz him about the trust isse here and there but so card it hasn't driven me so crazy that I can't hang in there. He had appilogized but been very adamant that while he madr a mistake, forgiveness in a relationship is just as important as trust. So I'm trying. I live him but am just scared of hurt, you know? I hate how i need to think, wonder if he is just smoking and hiding it. So aggravating! But he's a very positive influence in ellas life, my life, and the babies life so I have to make it work.

Preethiwhen is your next scan? So glad you are being so string in all of this. My sister had her baby yesterday on her due date and the baby is in nicu with fever and infection. No one can see her or hold her so it goes to show you really don't know what can happen even with a full term baby. I hope yours stays in there until 34 weeks at least. What will you name her?

 

[Huggles]

i hope your sister's baby gets better soon ny

I had a rather productive day today - cleared out two of the shelves in the baby's cupboard and unpacked all the baby clothes we have from last year. Put 3 months to 2 years in the cupboard, and newborn and 0-3 months in the basket on the change table. When i originally unpacked the clothes it looked like so much. But now they're in teh cupboard it looks like nothing LoL. We've only bought about 5 items ourselves (4 last year and 1 this year), all the rest were given to us - a mixture of gifts and hand-me-downs. Hoping to get lots at my baby shower and we will also buy a couple more items as well.

Then i also unpacked the baby blankets into another one of the baskets, and the cloth nappies (terry towelling squares) into a third basket. Those will most probably mainly be used as burp cloths.

And i ordered my first batch of cloth nappies today!
I'll be getting a mixture of cherub tree and bumbeetles - i ordered the cherub trees today. Will do the bumbeetles next month.

Oh and yesterday I "bought" my respisense monitor! I found a lady selling one on gumtree for R500. Brand new they are R800 +R65 postage. I talked her down to R450 so i'm getting it almost half price! My friend will go and fetch it for me on the weekend as the lady lives far from me but close to my friend. Then i'll get it from her when i see her again.

We'll be getting an angel care monitor with breathing mat as well, but i like the respisense because it clips onto the nappy so goes wherever baby goes and can therefore be used when baby is sleeping in the pram/camp cot/ carseat as well as normal cot.

 

[Dew]

Heading for our 2 FS appointments today....send me your good wishes, hope it is the beginning of something beautifuful, thanks!

 

[Huggles]

Good luck Dew!!!

 

[nypage1981]

Huggles how come you are buying so many monitors? Do they monitor movement or something?

Dew good luck and i hope you walk away feeling hopeful and informed.

 

[Huggles]

i'm buying 2 because i'm paranoid LoL

And yes, i'm buying them for movement monitors. The angel care one is a normal monitor for sound so you can hear baby crying, but it also comes with a breathing mat which you put in the cot under teh mattress, and if baby stops breathing it sounds a loud alarm.

the respisense is a similar thing but much much smaller and clips onto the nappy so can be used when baby is asleep in the car seat or pram or camp cot (travel cot). If baby stops breathing then it does a little vibration thing after 15 sec to try and stimulate baby to start breathing again. And if still no movement after 20 sec then it also sounds a loud alarm.

We have 2 cats and I'm a little bit nervous that they might go and sleep on the baby's head or something. It is highly doubtful that they will, i really dont think they will, but I would prefer to have that peace of mind. And also against SIDS etc.

I was happy to just use the respisense, but dh wants the angel care one. But baby will be in his main wooden cot during the day when sleeping, but at night he'll be in teh camp cot next to our bed - so no angel care monitor - so that's why i want the respisense.

 

[nypage1981]

Which one do you recommend for the knowing if cats are in the cot? I have had that thought a few times about my huge fluff ball because his way to snuggle me is to drape over my throat literally and purr away. He isn't trying to be mean, but it strangles me!

 

[MummyCat]

Huggles, sounds like you've had a very productive baby day!

Nikki... glad you and OH are talking it through and working on it!

Dew... and best wishes sweetie!!

 

[Dew]

Sarah, where are you?

So, we visited both fertility clinics today. In second clinic, doctor (D2) decided to do a vaginal U/S on me to check my fibroid, ovaries and basal antral follicle count (BAF count tells the status of ovarian reserve). Unfortunately, we got bad news and we feel so discouraged and I can't stop crying since then. D2 could only see 2 follicles per ovary so a total of 4 which is considered very low. D2 said I don't have much fertile time left in me and he is not very sure how successfully I will react to clomid/injectibles (definitely need them in very high dose for superovulation). Even if we go for IVF, since I do not have good BAF, I may end up with fewer eggs thus reducing my chances of producing fertilized eggs/embryos (and definitely not a good chance of freezing embryo for later because I won't have any extras). I feel so discouraged and infertile and wish I was dead already.

I hate my gynec for not testing Estrogen levels on CD3 along with FSH because low FSH (a good sign) but with increased E2 will indicate poor ovarian reserve and we could have known about my situation long time back.

D2 suggested 100mg Clomid (CD2-6); if U/S doesn't look good then FSH injection on CD8, followed by Ovidrel trigger shot, IC (BD), IUI (36-40 hrs post-trigger) plus Progesterone supplement (LPS) [Next cycle will be modified based on first cycle observations and results]

Doctor at first clinic (D1) did not do any U/S, D1 also wants to do CD3 hormone tests; based on results and U/S start with injectables on CD3 (she doesn't believe much in clomid but left the decision to us); trigger shot; IUI; Progesterone supplement. She mentioned that E2 level information is missing but based on my medical history, she expects it to be fine. I think she is wrong because later D2 found diminished basal ovarian follicles. She also mentioned that if CD3 test results are not looking good, we won't proceed further (whatever that means?).

I never expected to hear such bad news about my fertility. Everything sounds horrible and so so pessimistic. Such a bad day and all these treatments are so ****ing expensive

 

[sherylb]

D2 sounds like a better way to proceed. At least D2 doesn't want to waste any time and got right down to U/S.

 

[Dew]

D2 sounds like a better way to proceed. At least D2 doesn't want to waste any time and got right down to U/S.

After meeting him, I was so mad at him as I felt very discouraged but he was just telling us the truth. D2 is more expensive as well but we haven't really compared the expenses yet.

 

[sherylb]

Unfortunately it sounds like time is of the essence and you may not be able to change your mind after you get started if you choose D1.

 

[NDH]

Oh Dew

I know the news must be devastating to you and I can't imagine what you're going through right now. It's a good thing you found out now though rather than waiting and trying on your own for a few more cycles. I hope D2 was wrong and that your reserves are even a bit higher than he says they are.

I'd be angry at the gynae as well for not ordering ALL the blood tests and just doing the progesterone one. As you say, you could have known months ago and been using this time to save up for treatment

 

[Dew]

Unfortunately it sounds like time is of the essence and you may not be able to change your mind after you get started if you choose D1.

You are right. Let's see what we both decide. DH has hugged and kissed me a couple of times but I am avoiding and staying away from him, feeling so guilty right now. He is currently reading all the literature provided to us by D2. Probably, we'll sit together after some time and discuss in detail. We definitely don't want to try more than 2 IUIs, then go for IVF. IVF needs at least 6 weeks of preparation time from the time we make a decision to go for it. And considering my low follicle count they may even have to cancel IVF if enough eggs are not produced by me. Very complicated indeed!