ok so who wants to get pregnant in 2011? (closed group)

[Huggles]

oh wow sarah, is that him in your avatar pic? He's absolutely gorgeous!

 

[flyingduster]

Oh hun! You are right; it is not supposed to hurt! It often DOES hurt in the early weeks as you both learn and grow, but a good latch should NOT hurt, so getting that pain... I can only imagine...

I assume you've had him checked for a tongue/lip tie? They are common causes for poor [painful] latching. And have you tried 'biological nursing' where you lay semi-reclined with him on your belly [or angled across your upper belly if his feet annoy your wound] and let him root and latch himself? It can often fix a lot of latch problems letting them get in to the best spot themselves. But of course if it's a physical issue then positioning won't fix it!!! Have you gotten to a La Leche League meeting at all? They are amazingly supportive women, and someone may have a glint of info that helps you too!

Heres hoping with pumping and time, he will grow and be able to latch on pain-free when his mouth is bigger!!!!!!

 

[MummyCat]

Oh hun!! *hugs* My cousin had gall stones after her second pregnancy. A week after giving birth she crippled over in agony and threw up everywhere. They told her to eat chicken, fish, salad... all lean stuff. cut out meats like lamb etc and then once she had breastfed for 6 months and felt ready to leave little one with bottles of expressed milk she had her gall bladder removed because the stones were too big. Or something like that, can't remember all the details but it was done on Dr's advice. She's fair and in her late 30's. Apparently it makes it more common.

With regards to breastfeeding. We struggled too. Sounds like things are not easy for you. All I can recommend as a friend, is speak to the GP's, midwives, lactation consultants, friends etc. Listen to their advice, give the things a go that make sense to you or that you think might help and then if you do make the decision to move to bottle feeding, you will know you did all you could and that the move was in the best interest of your baby. Getting milk, be it formula or breast is better than getting no milk.

I have only recently stopped feeling guilty about not breastfeeding the girls for a decent amount of time. We tried, we struggled and though some people may criticise us for using formula (like it is any of their business) I have two daughters who have followed their growth curves perfectly and have had very few periods of illness.

Do what works for you as a family my lovely.

 

[MummyCat]

I'd like to point out...I'm not telling you to stop trying to breastfeed.... but rather that try as many things as possible to make it work before making the decision to stop... if you get to that point.

 

[sarahincanada]

hi everyone! yes huggles thats him in my avatar, are you not on my facebook I thought you were so didnt post any photos on here. thanks everyone for the replies, preethi its not stupid as I do plan on going to see a lactation person at the walk in clinic, I was just in so much pain I needed some time off and couldnt face going out in public and having the searing pain in front of strangers.

flying thank you as well for the advice, I might try that. Ive honestly been so scared of putting him back on as my nipples are less sore after about a week of pumping only. they are still sore but not as bad, also got a larger size nipple for the breast pump which has helped (its hard as you dont know how to size yourself so was just using what came with the pump rental not thinking it might be too small until midwife mentioned it). it wasnt a cracked pain (even though both nipples were covered with one large scab on each) more of a bruised pain around the base of the nipple where it meets the areola. I think he would latch on well and then one time perhaps have a narrow latch and by the time I felt the pain the damage was done as I bruise so easily. also he lost weight in the first week so I was told to feed every 2 hours and I think that was were the damage occurred.

anyway after my emergency room visit on monday then going for ultrasound and results I missed about 5 pumpings and mum was home had to feed him formula, then next day my supply is half so Im now pumping every 2 hours trying to get it back up. I was so upset yesterday thinking why did that have to happen as I was pumping quite well, but midwife said it should come back up.

mummy I know how you feel and I never judge anyone for their choices. I was FF and my mum was so upset seeing me in pain and kept suggesting I give up. but him having breast milk is important to hubby and I, although I dont mind topping up with formula as I see it as a multivitamin just incase I am lacking in anything! and I like pumping then bottle feeding as I can see how much he is getting and its quicker, when on the breast he kept falling asleep and taking much longer each feed (which equals less sleep) and him losing weight was so stressful so I like knowing he is getting his 3 oz every 3 hours. I know theres advantages of the breast and I am a little sad but I might try again if he hasnt forgotton. All the nurse mentioned his strong suck so that probably didnt help with my sensitive skin!

I have to go see my dr about the gallstones, if I wanted to get pregnant again I would probably have it taken out as I wouldnt want that again ontop of everything else.

had a bit of a breakdown with MIL, right in the middle of the bad pain and feeding/pumping every 2 hours she phoned as she works with public health and lactation specialists. she basically said 'topping up with formula is the worse thing you can do as he will get nipple confusion', it was just not want I wanted to hear so I hung up and yelled at hubby that i was never talking to her again. Thing is, if she had phoned and asked for the full story she would have known I was already pumping and giving him a bottle inbetween painful feedings, so he was already getting the bottle with breast milk. and the formula was to stop him going into hospital because of his weight. I find she never really listens to me and just talks about what she wants to talk about, so it all got to me when I was in so much pain and stress and lack of sleep. Im not sure if hubby talked to her but she must have noticed I didnt txt her any photos or talk to her for a bit.

anyway gotta go and pump, talk soon

 

[nypage1981]

Oh Sarah, I know just your pain. I had that unfortunately, it Lasted about 4-5 months I think? I cried and grasped the bed sheets when he would latch on, I threw up from pain a few times, It was horrid. We tried shields and once in a while it helped. He had the shallow latch problem and I have over supply issues so the let down hurts every time. Still does a year later. Breast feeding didn't happen easy or painless for me either and it was so hard. Sorry you are dealing with it. Everyone always told me around 2 months it gets better so at the beginning thats what I endured it for. But then I was quite a long ways past 2 months and it wasn't better. They were definitely not referring to the type of pain we experienced. Its not just a little sore at latching time for a bit, its pure torture. I cried a lot and grasped a lot of things very very hard as he ate and just powered through. I am glad I did now because I would never guess that my nipples ever hurt that badly. I think it took Kian longer to get a good latch since he was early, so for you it may not be so long because babies with bad latches do seem to grow out of that and "get it" some day. Hope it is soon, I feel for you. We never got help for the latch because my research seemed to tell me that most women who tried didn't really help they just needed to let the baby naturally get a hang of it. Good luck, I hope it happens soon for him.

 

[sarahincanada]

wow NY, good for you for continuing. It felt like my nipples were being cut off everytime he latched on, it was just too much for me. much worse than a chopped off finger, at least with that pain meds helped dull the pain. I havent tried again as Ive been in and out of the hospital all week, I have gallstones and had 4 attacks, they feel like a heart attack and I cant breath well as it feels like Im being crushed from the front and back Im having my gallbladder removed but have to wait till Jan 2 as its too inflamed right now. Leaving my lil man to go to the hospital has been horrible and I cried whenever someone said congratulations (nurse say I was 2-3 weeks PP on the chart). They said next attack I might stay in a few days, or they might bring surgery forward but its not ideal and more risky.

so I basically sit at home in fear of another attack. and ontop the exhaustion from feeding/changing/cleaning bottles every 3 hours so only getting a couple of hours sleep its so hard! I feel miserable that the gallstones had to happen to me. I have to be on a low fat diet which is hard too when you have no time to grocery shop and cook so Ive been living on chicken and I really miss chocolate!! looks like I wont be having a nice christmas dinner either, just turkey and plain potatoes for me!

its a good job we were pumping and topping up with formula already as my nights in emergency my mum had to feed him formula. hubby would no way allow cieran to come to hospital and risk those emergency germs. Ive had to pump and dump a few times as id had morphine drip at the hospital. my supply has gone down from the long hours in hospital this week so now I have to try and pump every 2 hours to get my supply back.

apart from that im loving my lil man. he has grown so much already and its only been 3 weeks. my mum has been a great help and she is going to extend her stay 2 more weeks just incase I have some more attacks (as hubby comes with me). i never knew about gallstones being a risk for my age group with pregnancy, never heard about them before.

hope you are all well

 

[flyingduster]

You are doing amazingly considering it all!!!! If you have time online, go to the kellymom.com forums cos they have SO much help and info there about pumping and getting your supply back up and everything; and no confrontational person to have to talk to directly that way either!!

I [almost] wanna go latch Caleb on to you so you can feel what a decent latch does feel like so you can have hope for the future! lol.

But mummy is right; try EVERYTHING you want to, try as hard as you can [without burning out or pushing too hard!!!] so that if it does come to a point of dropping the breast milk then you can know you really did the best you could. It's that thing I always say to myself when things in life are so damned hard; "What will I regret more in the future?" I HATE living in regret about something, and no one can make you feel guilty without your permission, so if you need to ever go to full time formula, then OWN the decision! Screw what anyone else thinks or says, only YOU know your struggles and YOU are the one that needs to be happy with how things turn out.

So keep trying, seek help and support, but don't let others guilt you in to more than you can cope with.

 

[Huggles]

So sorry you're having such a hard time

 

[MummyCat]

Oh Sarah!

You poor thing!! I hope that you can remain attack free for the next couple months and get a chance to get your supply up. I presume you've looked into fenugreek (spelling?) and things like that, they can help increase your supply I'm told.

I found loads of helpful info on KellyMom! I sat for hours reading up, so have a look if you can.

Thinking of you and glad your Mum could extend her stay! Hope you guys weren't troubled by Hurricane Sandy? xxx

 

[nypage1981]

Oh NO! Sarah that sucks so much to get stones right now. Sheesh. I agree with Amy, keep at it if that is what will make you the happiest. Eat tons of oatmeal and water. Oatmeal is said to up the supply! Honestly, I would have quite about 67 times if it wasn't for Amy on my journal. (flying in case you dont know). She was my cheerleader and I am still going because of her encouragement. It no longer hurts! well, now we have teeth. Thats another story.
I hope you feel better soon. Things will get better, just enjoy your baby!

 

[nypage1981]

Quit, not quite. derrrrrr

 

[sherylb]

Is Kian a biter? I expected K to take up biting when she got her 6 teeth but instead she's kissing.

 

[NDH]

Oh Sarah I'm so sorry to read of your difficulties

I'm very lucky that I never experienced any of that pain many women experience initially but I'm sure getting it now breast feeding a baby with teeth while pregnant. But I know that's nothing compared to the pain you've described and then gallstones on top of it! Crazy!

to you. You'll have to have another Christmas dinner after you get them removed.

 

[sarahincanada]

preview from our professional shoot from last week (before I had my first gallbladder attack)

will reply soon, off to pump

 

[NDH]

Oh my goodness what a cutie! Love his hair!

 

[babyhopes2323]

oh sarah so sorry i missed this. i was unwell for a week and was in hospital for 2 days with IV drips due to gastritis.


im so sorry youre in so much pain and have to endure gall stones,. xx i really hope it gets better for you xxx

Cieran is such a gorgeous little man.. love the professional shot !!! xxx

 

[Huggles]

gorgeous photo!
I'm amazed at how alert he looks!

 

[nypage1981]

He looks like a doll! So perfect. Hope you are feeling better now. Stupid stones for ruining your holiday eating. These are not the kind that can pass on their own like kidney ones, right? I am pretty sure no but not 100%!

 

[sarahincanada]

hi!!

I think they can pass, but once you have an attack they say 70% more likely to have another, so I think they prefer to remove gallbladder as you dont actually need it. theres no way I would get pregnant again with it and risk having attacks like this again. my ultrasound still shows stones after my 2 attacks so if I did pass some theres more

I go see the c section guy in 2 weeks, going to ask him how long I have to wait if I want to get pregnant again as my MW said 2 years between birthdays and I would be 42 Im hoping we can do some transfers next summer so then bday would be nearer a year and a half apart. I think if I elect to have a c section they allow it to be sooner than 2 years.

cant believe Im discussing another, a few weeks ago in the midst of breastfeeding pain and hospital visits I thought never again. but Ive had a good week so thinking about it also mainly due to my age obviously.

my low fat diet is horrible, not that I was to eat loads of fat but when tired and no time its hard to have healthy filling meals. Also I dont like much so that doesnt help. Im living off chicken! and bread fills me and doesnt seem to cause an attack. I guess I might finally be able to lose the 40lbs I gained in my 30's, I never could before but fear of the pain and leaving Cieran has forced me to eat low fat!!

NDH how are you doing???