Old School POAS addicts - chat thread!

[motherofboys]

Aw sorry af is being so horrible.

So when I go out on Friday, apparently it won't be a 60s or 70s theme at the bar or even 80s. It'll be 90s! Can't believe it's actually been long enough since the 90s for it to be a theme night lol makes you start feeling your age when the music if your youth becomes a theme lol

 

[steph.]

Omg! I can't believe the 90s is a theme now! I guess it has been 15 years since the 90s, the 18 year olds won't even remember it. The good thing is that at least if it were me I wouldn't have to go out shopping for clothes!

 

[motherofboys]

Ha ha it's true it's been a while really, was just a shock. I can't say I was as enthusiastic about 90s music, not that I was around for music from the other decades (or enough to remember) like when things are classed as retro and they don't seem old enough to be lol

Ds2 is 7 today! Can't quite believe that either lol

 

[steph.]

Happy belated birthday Zac!

Sienna is 1 tomorrow and I can't believe it either!

I think I'm around 12 dpo today, I know I said I wouldn't get my hopes up but then I squeezed my nipple (as you do) and milky stuff came out. BFN Guess I'm in for yet another cycle. Found out today some friends of ours are expecting in April too, I'm trying to be happy for them but I'm not there yet. Our first kids are only 13 days apart and I think they had been ttc #2 for a while as they kept moving their ttc date forward "we'll try for a 2 year gap, then for a 2.5year, then for 3year ect. And we used to be really close when we went through the down syndrome scare over my last pregnancy they were the people we turned to for support. We used to see them pretty much every weekend, us mummies would also meet up a couple of times a week. Then since dd2 was born we've only seen them a handful of times which I thought was maybe due to them not managing to conceive. We invited them to Sienna's bday fully expecting them to turn it down and they said they are coming and announced the pregnancy. So deep down I am really happy for them, but I guess a little jealous? I'm a terrible person, right?

 

[steph.]

Also mil is arriving in about an hour which is making my pity party worse!

 

[Mrs. Eddie]

Happy Belated Birthday to Zac!

And OMG, I can't believe the 90's are retro, I feel old now...

Steph, I don't think you're a horrible person, sometimes it's tough to be happy for others sometimes when you want something so badly for yourself. I hope you're able to survive MIL's visit

I went to see my new niece this weekend and OMG she is so sweet and tiny It really made me miss the newborn days of being able to snuggle them on the couch and also not miss them at all when my sister was talking about her sleepless nights.

And AF has finally left the building So I'm now CD 6 aka the most boring part of my cycle...

 

[Mrs. Eddie]

Steph, why do you think you're out? Because you can express milk still? Sorry, I haven't had my morning coffee yet so I'm a bit confused...

 

[Mrs. Eddie]

Also, was wondering if you ladies maybe had some advice re transitioning a little one from nursing to sleep. I posted the question below in the natural parenting forum and got very little response...

My daughter is still breastfed about three times a day. I went back to work when she was a year so she has been in day care for two months. Before day care, I always nursed her to sleep (bed time and naps). At day care she goes to sleep fine for them (they sometimes have to rock her or pat her back) and on weekends we normally have to take her for a walk to get her down for her naps or she falls asleep in the car (my DH transitions her to the crib after she's asleep).

I'm just wondering if anyone has any advice or tips on what worked for them on getting their LOs to go to sleep on their own without nursing. We are planning on going away for an evening at the end of November so I would like to begin introducing this soon so we can gently transition her into this. We can rock her to sleep but it would be nice to get her used to going into the crib and being comfortable enough to fall asleep there eventually (like she does at day care).

Thanks in advance, any advice is appreciated!

 

[motherofboys]

Not a terrible person at all, it's normal to feel a little jealous even if you feel happy for that person.
I know I feel old today, ds2 turning 7, ds4 will be 1 next Monday (20th) 90s are retro and I did so much walking today that my hips are killing me lol

I'm on my phone right now so will reply about my experience whe. I get onto the laptop later if that's ok. Although I'm not sure how much help I'll actually be lol

 

[Mrs. Eddie]

at the aching hips comment

And thanks Kay, I appreciate any advice I can get!

 

[motherofboys]

Its not funny (ok it is a bit lol) today has been one long line of things going wrong, and part of the was a stupid bus driver leaving me standing at the stop.

Anyway. Nursing to sleep. Could DH be the one to settle her? Could she nurse until almost asleep, or have a bottle of expressed/water/some other milk?
DS3 nursed to sleep, but would always settle for DH eventually. When we stopped BFing (although I admit he was a lot older) he was in a bed and I laid with him and read the first night I put him to bed. DH had done a few nights then I did one and we had told him the milk was all gone. This obviously wont work as shes too young to understand that and if you don't want to stop yet then its just confusing for them anyway.
DS4 still falls asleep on a bottle.
Could you bath, feed in the darkened room, then lay her down while she's a little sleepy and stroke her head and sing or something? Although that wasn't a feeding transition that was something we did with DS1 because we were rocking him to sleep and he just got too heavy as I already had quite a sizeable baby bump LOL

Erm.... You could try, not controlled crying where you let them cry, but a similar thing where you lay them down and leave, if they cry come back and reassure them, lay them back down and go again. With CC you let them cry for extended periods of time (5minutes then 10 minutes and so on) but this way you come back as soon as she cries. Takes more patience I expect. I haven't done it but done an older version where again they need to understand so you say "i'm just going for a wee" then come back. then just go to get some water and come back. eventually they are asleep when you come back.

Have a look for The No Cry Sleep Solution book. Theres a baby one and a toddler and preschooler one.

DS4 is still in our bed and I'm still lost at how to move him out into a cot without him getting upset while trying to sort everyone else out. Was easier with ds1 to give him as much time as he needed getting him to sleep because no one else needed anything. I think at this point he'll just be in with us a few more months then move into a bed in with the others.

Like I said I'm not sure how much help I've been but theres a few ideas there.

 

[Mrs. Eddie]

Thanks Kay, that is helpful!

I don't mind nursing her still at night but right now I have to nurse until she is completely asleep and then carefully transfer her to the crib. She normally goes down fine but if she wakes up she will often stand right up and refuse to go back to sleep until I nurse her again. It's taken me as long as 45 minutes to get her to sleep (that's just nursing) and at times it's annoying.

I might start having DH come and put her down after she finishes eating and then if she wakes up he can try to get her back down. Or maybe I'll nurse her first and then do story time and then bed.

I also think she needs to go to bed earlier. She normally is in bed by about 8:30 or 8:45 but honestly I think she should be in bed by 8:00. We're going to start moving her bedtime up slowly to see if that helps as well.

 

[motherofboys]

Good luck. Its tricky. Seths started being a pain at sleep time, and I think its tiredness and the fact he can get around now is just making it worse. Like if he is tired and I try to give him a bottle he will drink some, then throw the bottle, then get down, then up, then down, then climb up and try to bang on whatever he can reach. Its exhausting for me as much as it must be him and he is rubbing his eyes and ears while messing around so I know he is tired.

 

[steph.]

Sorry Emily, I was all flustered when I wrote the previous post so I don't think it had anything to do with your morning coffee. Basically I got my hopes up on being pregnant because I managed t squeeze some milk out of my boobs even though it had completely dried up. Then I tested and got a bfn at 12 dpo, so I'm assuming I'm out.

As for the feeding to sleep I don't have much advice. DD1 fed to sleep until about 13 months and then it stopped working (she would feed and still be wide awake). At that point dh started putting her down, initially he had to rock her, then after a couple of months she started going down awake and he would pat her, then after a couple more months he could put her down awake and walk out. Then when dd2 was born and we travelled overseas to stay with my parents she started refusing to go to sleep by herself so someone would have to lie down next to her until she was asleep and then sneak out (could take aaaaages). Finally at 2.5 she decided she was a big girl and started kicking us out of her room, although on some nights she still forgets that she's meant to be big and wants someone in with her. That was for night time. Day time naps she never went down by herself and usually I would plan the day so that she would fall asleep in the car on the way back but would occasionally rock her. She doesn't nap everyday any more but just last weekend she was so tired and refusing to go down for a nap that I rocked!

Dd2 I rock to sleep. Depending on her mood she will go down semi-awake and fall asleep herself, but never fully awake.

So I guess I don't have any advice since I had to rock my almost 3 year old to sleep 4 days ago, BUT what I would say is just do what works for you now and don't stress about it. If it stops working then change it.

 

[motherofboys]

I agree do what works for you and what you are happy doing. None of it lasts forever. Eventually she won't need help falling asleep, and you'll miss the sleepy cuddles. Although when you've been laid on the bottom bunk of bunk beds, nursing your 2 year old to sleep for the last hour and every time you think they are asleep and try to move they open their eyes, it feels like it's never going to end.

 

[motherofboys]

Urgh Mummy guilty and typical kid timing. Seths full of cold today, now I'm feeling bad about the idea of leaving him Friday night. Nates had a bit of a cold for about a week so I doubt Seth will be better by Friday. I know he'll have everyone here looking after him but when they are little they want their Mama don't they?

 

[Mrs. Eddie]

Thanks for the advice Ladies, I really appreciate it. I think I'm stressing more about the fact that I will be leaving her overnight and that if I'm not there she won't go to sleep easily but she's stayed with my Mom before when we've gone out and she's always slept, (in fact the last time we went out she slept better than she ever has for my Mom). So my worrying is probably for nothing. My DH has always put her to sleep fine as well when I've been out...

I'm all for doing what works so I guess we'll keep doing what we're doing until it doesn't work anymore. I do love the cuddly nursing to sleep but as you said Kay sometimes I feel like I'm going to go crazy with the put down, wake up, nurse more routine

I think I'm a bit frustrated too because since she started day care she hasn't been sleeping as well as she used to. I expected her sleep would suffer a bit as it was a big change for her; I'm hoping things will get better after a month or so as she will hopefully be more used to this routine...

 

[Mrs. Eddie]

Oh and Steph I'm sorry about the BFN You're not out fully until the witch shows though. For this next cycle you're going to try temping right?

Kay, that sucks that your little guy is not well. I think you should still try and go out if you can. I know it's tough to leave them when they're ill but honestly you'll probably need a break. I know Isla was sick with a bad cold and I was supposed to go out with friends and was going to cancel. My DH insisted that I go to get out of the house (it was winter and we had been stuck inside for 3 days). It was the best thing I could have done; I felt so much better after getting out of the house; it also made dealing with a cranky baby the next day much easier

 

[motherofboys]

its like they know they can't nurse with the other caregivers so they won't get what they want and don't bother trying. Nursing is so much more than food for them too.

 

[motherofboys]

Oh and thanks, I think I'm still going to go I'll just still feel bad about it LOL
DH has roped his sister in to help him apparently