'Older Mums' buddies thread!

[Shining Star]

Hi everyone,

Congratulations Meercat, and I also LOVE the name!
Vicky, you must be so excited to meet your little men!
Truman, I'm sure there must be some sort of law against you having to either go or take that day off unpaid/holiday. that's awful.. My dad is a HR manager and deals with employment law all the time, I will ask him where you stand on that if it will help you.

Hope you are all well!

 

[Shining Star]

Yey.... congratulations Meerkat. Glad you and Emily are doing well. When you get settled we would love to see a picture. Everyone has been asking about you.

Vicky, well.... not long now. I bet you can't wait. Keep us updated cause you never know the lil ones might decide to make an appearance on their own!

Hope everyone is ok and doing well.

We went to see Obstetrician today she was lovely and we got to listen to bubs heartbeat again (never get tired of that)!

On another note work have arranged a weekend trip to London leaving Friday morning 21 May (my EDD is 14/06), they plan to go out around London, ride the eye and finish with dinner and drinks/clubbing etc., so I declined. I am not sure anyone is really going to want an 8 month pregnant women with them spoiling the fun and we would have to share twin rooms as well!. I wasn't that bothered about the trip but what does annoy me is that I have been told that if I don't go I have to either work or take the Friday off as holiday/unpaid, the thing is if everyone from the office is going I think it is unreasonable to expect me to work on my own in the building and on the other hand I think it is unfair that I have to use a day of my holiday when everyone gets the day off for nothing and a trip to London all expenses paid. Am I being unreasonable?

OK, I have spoken to him and unfortunately he said that if you decided not to go then officially an employer would say that it is your choice. So, sorry, because if you got a doctors letter it isn't that you can't 'work' so they would probably say you should still be going into work. He also said that if they were to say you could stay at home, others that didn't want to go on the 'teambuilding' weekend would say that they wanted the day off. They could (ha ha) say they are being 'discriminated' against!!!!

Thought I would be able to give you good news, sorry. I really hope this hasn't confused you, have tried to make sure that it makes sense but my brain isn't working very well at the minute!

 

[Seity]

Took my bump for a spin again... Ok, so it was just a little ice skating. I love it so much and it feels great to get out on the ice even if it is only for a little while. I think he likes it because he'll be a right nutter moving about for hours, but when I'm skating he's quieter and doesn't prod me to death. After, he's right back to being a jumping bean, so I figure the skating is soothing. Not really a point to this post, just in a good mood.

 

[polaris]

Took my bump for a spin again... Ok, so it was just a little ice skating. I love it so much and it feels great to get out on the ice even if it is only for a little while. I think he likes it because he'll be a right nutter moving about for hours, but when I'm skating he's quieter and doesn't prod me to death. After, he's right back to being a jumping bean, so I figure the skating is soothing. Not really a point to this post, just in a good mood.

Haha, glad you enjoyed the ice-skating!

Probably when baby gets here, you will find that he does love movement, I was pretty active during my pregnancy with Thomas, and I find that the only way to soothe him at times is by bouncing him quite vigourously - I wonder if your baby will be the same?

 

[maybebaby3]

truman, that is soooooooo unfair. cant u get a sick note. surely then they will have 2 pay u?

vicky - how exciting getting induced in a few days!!!

meerkat - congrats on your little girl!!!

i am fuming as i ordered maternity clothes online over a month ago and they still have not arrived! (supposed 2 take 5-8days). i emailed the company and they said that they wont do anything til the end of jan!!!! i ordered the 2nd week in december!!! i need the maternity clothes now! so annoyed!!!

 

[_Vicky_]

helloooo ladies - OMG I cant beleive that Truman that is really wrong imo booooooooo

ICE SKATING??????????? I am impressed if I can get up the stairs in less than five minutes now days hehehehehehehe

I took the woofs out yesterday with my oh and managed to slip (did the really graceful landing on my knees then wobbled to hands too in a big puddle lol - never seen oh run so fast and dogs all thought I was playing - after the shock went we were both laughing so much I couldnt get up hahahaha - can you imagine the sight!!!!)

Well I am 37 weeks today - FULL TERM FULL TERM FULL TERM - soooooo my little boys (or not so little now I guess at my scan on thurs they were 6lb and 7lb guestimate lol) have every chance of not needing any support when they arrive - WHOOP WHOOP WHOOP.

I am in a weird mental place atm - I mean this is the last sunday I wont be a mum eekkkk.

We put the cot in our room last night and are putting car seats in today hehehehehehe

 

[_Vicky_]

i am fuming as i ordered maternity clothes online over a month ago and they still have not arrived! (supposed 2 take 5-8days). i emailed the company and they said that they wont do anything til the end of jan!!!! i ordered the 2nd week in december!!! i need the maternity clothes now! so annoyed!!!

omg cant you get a refund?

 

[cb1]

Hi Ladies

I just saw a link to this thread in the 2nd tri. I'm 37 and pg with our first.

 

[maybebaby3]

vicky - how exciting!!! u must be so longing 2 meet your LO's now that it is so close! i cant do anything about a refund or anything until jan 29th when they said 2 contact their lost parcel dept! not happy!!!

 

[maybebaby3]

welcome cb1

 

[Truman]

Hi everybody and welcome CB1.

Thanks for getting the advice for me Shining Star, I guess it is to be expected, but I don't think they have even thought about me really and I have worked there for 5 years, guess they were still shocked that I am pregnant again!. It has been a difficult week this week anyway for lots of reasons. Work gets worse, we have to make up the hours we weren't at work even though they sent us home due to bad weather on Tuesday last week and those that didn't get in over the remaining days have to take it as holiday. OH and ..... I just found out stat maternity pay isn't for the full 52 weeks and I only get 90% salary for 6 weeks!! Now it's just a case of working how much time I can afford to have off work!

Well, not long for you now Vicky, have you had to buy two of everything? I was wondering when you guys started buying for your lil bubs. I have been tempted on a few occasions but still on tender hooks.

I can't believe I am starting again when this lil one arrives I will be 41! They say life begins at 40.........

 

[SKATERBUN]

Nice to hear your last post as I know now Im not alone in worrying about the financial side of things and how my being pregnant will be taken at work.
Im 36 and thought Id be ' well off' by now, but as I had one failed long term relationship i literally had to start again 3 years ago. I now have a tiny 1 bed house and so wont have the luxury of a nursery and like you say am wracking my brains at how i will survive on just 6 weeks on 90% salary. I pay the mortgage and most of the bills and wonder just how its going to work. I thought I had to take this chance now though as my biologcal clock is ticking and I really want another by the time Im 40.
Good luck to you and congrats on your pregnancy hope it all works out fine.

 

[_Vicky_]

Well, not long for you now Vicky, have you had to buy two of everything? I was wondering when you guys started buying for your lil bubs. I have been tempted on a few occasions but still on tender hooks.

Yep two of everything - costs a fortune!!!!!!!!! and dont even get me started on HIP and all the other stuff - you only get one lot even though its mutiple births and CTC too you only get one lot of baby rate grrrrr

 

[_Vicky_]

Nice to hear your last post as I know now Im not alone in worrying about the financial side of things and how my being pregnant will be taken at work.
Im 36 and thought Id be ' well off' by now, but as I had one failed long term relationship i literally had to start again 3 years ago. I now have a tiny 1 bed house and so wont have the luxury of a nursery and like you say am wracking my brains at how i will survive on just 6 weeks on 90% salary. I pay the mortgage and most of the bills and wonder just how its going to work. I thought I had to take this chance now though as my biologcal clock is ticking and I really want another by the time Im 40.
Good luck to you and congrats on your pregnancy hope it all works out fine.

yep me too re the starting again - best thing I ever did but lord financially its a crippler. Doesnt help when the ex strips your house bare of everything you paid for but hey ho - who's happy now he is welcome to it imo.

I am kind of lucky kind of not - I am self employed and work from home and although there is no maternity pay I get Maternity Allowance with is equivalent to SMP - but the up side is coming back to work is possible whereas where I having to pay childcare for two - FORGET IT

I think one of the (so far few) downsides to being older is that you have a standard of life and outgoings so dropping down so low again financial is more of a challenge that say if you were in your early twenties. But other than that and the reports I get that its physically worse as you are older that is the only downside I have found xxxxxxxxxxxx

 

[_Vicky_]

ps truman - I bought a few bits after the dating scan but most not until 23 weeks as I have a herditary whatsit that couldnt be ruled out before 23 weeks so didnt want to tempr fate xxxxxxxxx

 

[Seity]

Hi everybody and welcome CB1.

Thanks for getting the advice for me Shining Star, I guess it is to be expected, but I don't think they have even thought about me really and I have worked there for 5 years, guess they were still shocked that I am pregnant again!. It has been a difficult week this week anyway for lots of reasons. Work gets worse, we have to make up the hours we weren't at work even though they sent us home due to bad weather on Tuesday last week and those that didn't get in over the remaining days have to take it as holiday. OH and ..... I just found out stat maternity pay isn't for the full 52 weeks and I only get 90% salary for 6 weeks!! Now it's just a case of working how much time I can afford to have off work!

Well, not long for you now Vicky, have you had to buy two of everything? I was wondering when you guys started buying for your lil bubs. I have been tempted on a few occasions but still on tender hooks.

I can't believe I am starting again when this lil one arrives I will be 41! They say life begins at 40.........

We don't get mat pay, so I'll be taking 6 weeks of sick time so I'll get paid while I'm gone and then back to work. I'm the sole wage earner, so I can't afford any days without pay.
I'm fortunate that we've been given just about everything we'll need, so the only thing I've actually bought at this point is a play mat I saw on sale for 50% off.

Welcome cb1!

 

[Csunshine013]

Oh my goodness Vicky your scheduled for today! WOOO HOOO! Hope all goes well!

Siety your getting so close as well!

I can't remember everybody but hope your all doing well!

afm just had my second scan Monday and it showed the correct amount of growth so officially have started my preggo journal and moved on over here. I'll have two more appointments and then get my gender scan at 20wks I think. LOL Dr said everything looked good and I could see the little one wriggling all around arms and legs moving like there was no tomorrow. The HB was 190 and had some sickness this time so all my friends that know think I'm having a boy cause didn't have any sickness with DD. personally don't care which it is just healthy and carried full term!

Hope your all doing well will check back later to see how Vicky came out!

 

[Seity]

Sounds like a great appointment and things are going well, Csun!

Thinking of you Vicky and hope all went well!

 

[Truman]

Will be thinking of you Vicky, can't wait to hear from you again.

Seity I can't believe you don't get SMP and that you will have to go back after 6 weeks. What do you do for a living?

Skaterburn, welcome. Do you have any children already? or is this your first. After a while on my own I started again in a new relationship with my two children, never expected to be having a baby now 11 years later and at 40!! But I guess no matter what life throws at us we find a way to manage and I am really happy about this new addition to our family. My children are grown up now but they will always be my babies.. lol!

 

[Seity]

Seity I can't believe you don't get SMP and that you will have to go back after 6 weeks. What do you do for a living?

It's not that uncommon not to have paid maternity leave here. I can take up to 12 weeks unpaid and I can use any sick time or annual leave I've accumulated over the years to get paid for that time off. I work as the computer admin for a small field office, so while some of my duties can be done remotely from the main office it's going to be really hard for the users I support while I'm away. I may take up to 8 weeks, but I'm not sure yet. It mostly depends on if I start the leave early or wait till the baby is born.