older yummy mummy thread (30+)

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18 is young, and he was just barely turning 18. Accidents happen when parents don't talk about birth control with their kids :haha: All 3 of his kids were accidents, he had 3 by the time he was 21! :dohh: Needless to say, his wife got her tubes tied during her 3rd c-sect. He tried to get a vasectomy after the 2nd, but they wouldn't do it because he was so young.
 
OMG! 3 by 21! wow! i am finding 3 under 5's by the time i was 32 hard enough! lol!
 
He's lucky to live near my parents, so they could help them out. We'd never be able to do it, isolated from family the way we are. It's one of the main reasons we don't want a second baby.
 
I can tell you first hand that being young like that and having a baby is awful. I had my first daughter when I was very young ( 16) and her dad and I struggled for years and years.. we both managed to complete school, start careers, build a tidy little nest but sadly the strain of parenting we too much for him and we divorced 16 yrs later.

I am now re-married with Emily and I tell you what a difference.. I am much more laid back and stable and a much better parent ( even though Carolyn turned out very good and is completeing her major in Acounting with a minor in arts ) I felt that she was ripped off from a normal family life since we spent so much time just striving to keep a roof over our heads and food in our bellies
 
future - wow well done for completing all that with a baby :thumbup:

seity - where do your parents live in relation to you? i'd not be able to manage without my parents. my mum has looked after dylan and erin when my maternity leave run out as i had to go back to work full time. erin's nursery is about £260 a month and that's only 3 mornings a week :wacko: so i cant imagine having to pay for full time nursery for one or more children and i cant afford not to work with the mortgage and bills ec to pay!
 
They live in California and I live in New York, so about 3000 miles away on the complete opposite side of our very large country. I'd never be able to afford day care either. My OH is a SAHD. We don't get maternity pay either, so I've been back at work full time since he was 2 months. I had enough sick time saved up to get paid while I was off. I did a budget up to make sure we could live on just my salary before we started ttc.

future - Sounds like you've done very well. I know how hard it was for my brother, he even had to get special permission to attend a night college to get his degree so he could work during the day.
 
wow seity that is far! it must be hard being the one who goes out to work. i earn more than my DH now that he has changed jobs. we had to save really hard so i could afford my unpaid maternity leave. my maternity leave was 18wks paid which is crap compared to some other government jobs but i feel thankful for it compared to you girls in the USA who get none, that is just wrong!!! it must have been really tough going back to work for you, especially as gabriel hasn't been a really good sleeper has he?

well i am going to hand in my job application form today as well as an application to extend my maternity leave until september (unpaid) when the next school year starts. it's going to be a tight few months as we will eat at least another £8000 into our savings but it will be worth it! once i go back to work we can recoup some of the money.

erin is still really itchy with the chickenpox. she is really whiny half the time and the other half is fine. it's crappy being stuck indoors though. my mum is coming round later to stay with the kids so i can do the jobs i need doing out of the home!
 
Seity, Maybe..we are very lucky up here in Canada since we get a full year of Mat. pay here ( which is regulated by the Government so it's only about 50% of your wages )
When we planned on Emily it was decided that I would leave work to become a SAHM( after my payed leave was up ) One perk to starting adulthood so early is we have a very small mortgage since I have owned since 1992 so we can afford to live on DH income.
I had earned more tham DH but he has the better benefit pkg. So it works better for long term.
 
ooh future i'd love to be a SAHM but our mortgage is about £900 a month and that's for a small 3 bed flat! so that's just under half my wages. i'd love a bigger place but it's too expensive here!
 
maybebaby3 - It wouldn't have been nearly as bad if Gabriel had been a good sleeper or if there was the possibility of someone other than me getting up with him. He was waking every 2 hours to eat until just this past month. I'm not sure how I survived. I made more than my husband by far, even before he lost his job, so there was never a question of me staying at home, so I think that made it easier to go back to work as I always knew that would be the case. Our mortgage is not too bad, but in this town its actually cheaper to buy than to rent thanks to the college. I had savings at one point, but then I got married :rofl: I haven't had savings since then. I hope Erin feels better soon. I remember having the chickenpox. It was awful. Gabriel got the vaccine, so I hope he never gets them.
I'm not sure I would like being a SAHM, but I've never tried it either.
 
the vaccine is not routine here :nope: she's a lot perkier today and wants to go out. i think by tomorrow maybe i can take her out for a bit of fresh air as most of the spots are scabbing over. i think the boys will probably end up coming down with it in the next couple of weeks. all the advice says keep infected children away from siblings but it is a bit difficult when you live in a 80sqm flat! :rofl:
 
Have you had the chickenpox, Maybe ?
I have never had then so I worry about getting them now. Here they don't offer the vaccine till 15 months old. I don't know much about it, my worry is that as children they don't get the chickenpox but as adults they will be more able to get shingles. I hear they are worst than awful. I will have to talk it over with my DR before we decided weither to get her vaccinated.
What did your DR tell you about the vaccine, seity ?
Also, I don't know how you were able to work and BF during the night ( I remember you talking about your struggles on here:hugs:) You are a stronger person than myself. Think I would have resorted to FF or at least pump so as to get sleep during the night.. Good for you for keeping at it:thumbup:
 
i got chickenpox at 18 and it was awful so i'd rather they just got it now as it is milder when you get is as a child usually!!! mu mum and mil have never had chickenpox!
 
future - I have a low milk supply, so I never was able to get much of anything from a pump and with being at work, my OH ended up having to give formula during the day, so it was important to me that he be exclusively breast fed at night. I wanted him to have all the breast milk I could give him. I also went home at lunch and breast fed him every day.

The doctor gave us pretty much the same info as can be found online at the cdc website. He told us the common side-effects, etc. The vaccine has been shown to be about 71% to 100% effective at preventing chickenpox and kids who do end up getting it only get a very mild case of chickenpox. He'll get a booster shot when he's older (I believe it's 4-6 years) which has been shown to increase the effectiveness.
I was in 4th grade when I got them and it was horrible. I have a lot of scars from it because the itching was intolerable. My OH never managed to get it despite his mom trying to expose him, so that's another reason to vaccinate our LO, to protect my OH from possibly catching it from him now that he's older.
 
Woo! I heard from my OH. He's officially got a job. He'll start this Thursday and work 12 hours a week in the evenings brewing beer! :happydance:
 
great news seity!!!

do any of you girls want to be fb friends? i'm anne saxby and my profile pic is owen in a ball pool with a baby blue duffel coat on. feel free to add me as it'd be nice to share pics etc :thumbup:
 
That would be wonderful. I tried to look for you but couldn't find you.. I sent you a link in your private PM.
 
i wonder if i have some setting wrong that wont let you find me :wacko: have found you anyway :thumbup:
 
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