over 35 TTC #1. anyone? beuller?

[Libbystepof4]

AF showed this morning. 25 day cycle two months in a row. Minimal symptoms. Maybe my reproductive system is getting whipped into shape! I hope it will do something productive, though! Lol
Baby girl is seeming to be getting better. I think there was an element of exaggeration in her behavior. They go back to their mothers today so we will see what happens there. I've told her mother what's going on and she said she will be looking out for such behaviors and all. I hope she is OK.

 

[AnnieMac2]

That's really interesting you're having minimal symptoms and shorter cycles, Libby. Sounds promising to me!!! You need to publish your supplement formula online, because something is being really effective and really reorganizing your system. I'm demanding from the universe that this be your success cycle I'm getting such a good feeling for you!

And that's awesome that baby girl is feeling better. I guess with such a tumultuous life with her other mom, she's going to have some mood swings some times. It sounded so severe at first, but it's a relief to know it might be a little drama queen action!

 

[Libbystepof4]

Yeah even during AF cramps are very mild and don't have such terrible back pain and leg pain like I usually do! I'm impressed!
So Nora called. Baby girl had three pa ic attacks yesterday. She's getting appointments with pediatrician and a child psychologist. I'm so worried about this. I had hoped she was being dramatic and just trying to use this for some extra attention but its seeming like not now. Hopefully appointments will be soon.
How are you and your bean feeling!? Is DH super excited!?

 

[Cornfieldland]

Libby I hope she's ok : ( poor thing! It's so distressing to see little ones suffering like that. I'm glad ur cycles seem to be easier than they were, hoping it's all leading to ur BFP : )

My cycle seems a bit off with the previous cm last month and I don't have any OPKs so just winging it this month...we shall see.

Annie when's ur next ultra sound? Can't wait for ur little bump to start showing soon!

 

[Libbystepof4]

I imagine it's pretty normal for your cycle to be a little wacky at first after a CM. Doesn't make it feel any better, I'm sure, but I just know you will get your sticky one soon!
Hoping all this change will help me. I worry. I imagine we will be heading for some sperm count checking soon if it doesn't happen by Christmas. Trying to keep reminding myself that even with nothing wrong it can take years for some people!

 

[AnnieMac2]

Oh no, I hope she can get into see someone soon. This seems like such bizarre behavior. Does she say anything to Nora about what the problem might be? Is she panicking about being alone still? I hope someone can be helpful. And the boys are all acting totally normal and clueless?

I'm doing ok - no severe symptoms really except dh said it seemed like I got breast implants. When did you get a bump, Corn? My stomach's pretty flat still, but I noticed I cannot suck it in. Space must be filled up in there. Nuchal scan is last week in August. I don't get along with my mom so I scheduled it in the middle of a family vacation so I would only have to go 3 days. Haha evil.

Corn, it's always the month where you don't pay attention or try! I can't believe it even got rid of severe pain, Libby! That stuff is definitely already working its magic.

 

[Cornfieldland]

Libby I'm glad the little one is getting some help....hope she's ok.
Libby not to worry you...but from what I read if you have been trying for 6 months or longer and your over 35 they recommend getting the basic tests done. I think just because if you wait a year and ur older then your wasting time so to speak. I'm trying to get the basic blood work done for me.....I mean I've been fertilizing eggs but they haven't stuck. Maybe it's just egg quality but I'd like to know. On cycle 5 now with two cms. I really just thought I would get pregnant and that's it...easy as pie ; ) One thing I red said average is 4months and another says 1 to 2 years for over 35....well which is it?!

Annie I didn't show until late...but ur thin ; ) I think with my first at three months my pants where tight and I got my first stretch mark. I think at 16wks you will pop.

 

[Libbystepof4]

Yeah I've seen the same confusing information. My doctor seems to think I need to give it another minute. Believe me, the wasting time has been on my mind! Lol. I'm wondering if I don't have one of those tilted uteruses. I've been reading (because I'm crazy and anxious and ready to have a baby yesterday) that it's pretty common and can make it more difficult to conceive. Pairing that information with my mother's OBGYN telling her she had "a bend" in her tubing and having personally been told by two different gynos "I'm having trouble finding your cervix" (to which I replied "keep looking! It's in there!") I'm wondering if there might be something to it. I've read that a different position might actually help if that's the case. So maybe we will try that and see.
Baby girl is still scared to be alone. Nora said the panic seems to come in waves and then go completely away. She's hoping to get appointments next week but the pediatricians office is making them so who knows. The boys are fine. They come in and say " Violet's crying again. She's scared. I told her it's OK but she just keeps crying." They are having no issue and are concerned. Poor thing. Nora was supposed to go register the littlest for pre-k today. I reminded her yesterday. I hope she did it.
My mom has been here for two weeks. She left this morning and then I pretty much slept most of the day. I've not caught up since the kids were here and we were up all night with the girl.
Corn, I'm guilty, too, of thinking I would get pregnant right away. I didn't realize I thought that until it didnt happen and I was confused! Lol. I told DH I've decided for sure that I need to have four babies at a time since its taking so long to get pregnant. He thinks I'm nuts. Maybe I am. Lol
Annie, this stuff has been like a miracle. I keep being shocked at how much better I feel, just in general, even! And the PMS stuff is amazing. I just barely had any cramping all through AF, which lasts exactly four days now. I used to always get really bad soreness in my legs down to my knees. None of it now. Crazy boob pain. None of it now. Terrible back pain. Very mild in comparison. Crazy woman mood swings complete with excessive crying fits. NOTHING now. Seriously, miracle!!

 

[Cornfieldland]

Sign me up for vitex! I can't find it here...I think I will have to order it or go down town to get it. No crying fits..cramps boob pain hell ya! Libby maybe our time is just around the corner...I'm sure if we feel we need help we will get it. R u still doing OPKs? I couldn't this month so I'm going by cycle days since I'm pretty regular. But my "EWCM" is acting wierd so we shall see. We are alone this month so bowchicawahwah ; ) house to our selfs baby ya!

 

[Libbystepof4]

Ha-ha! No excuses about timing this month, huh?! Lol
I ordered the Vitex on Amazon.
I didn't do OPKs this last month since we were gone most of it. I intend to start doing them again tomorrow though!

 

[AnnieMac2]

That seems so bizarre that a doc couldn't find your cervix, Libby! But now we've established that you do, in fact, have a cervix. Haha one step at a time. How long did your doctor say to try before he'd give a referral? My doc seems to just hand out fertility referrals on demand. At first she said she'd give me one after 3 months of trying and then on the way out she goes, "Or just call me and get one whenever you feel like it." Haha.

Poor Violet! I really hope Nora follows through. My mom was a psychopath and didn't want any of us to go to counseling because she knew she'd look bad.

Corn - get that Vitex! That shit sounds amazing!

 

[AnnieMac2]

My best friend had a mc at 10 weeks (last week). She has wanted a child forever, and the pregnancy was an accident with a boyfriend of only two months, but she was so excited regardless of the situation. It's so hard. As much as we all know ttc is hell, can you imagine if you were on the road to having a child and then suddenly you can't even ttc in the foreseeable future? (This guy and her broke up the week before the bfp and then got back together because of it, so I don't know where this leaves them). She's going to call me today and I can't fall back on the it's just a matter of time/you can try again soon things that we all take comfort in

 

[Cornfieldland]

Annie i hope that phone call goes OK. All you can do is be a listening ear and sympathize. It's a hard situation. Hopefully a couple years from now she's in the right situation to have a family, but I know that doesn't help the hurt right now. Just isn't fair

 

[Libbystepof4]

Oh gosh, Annie. Your poor friend. I cannot even imagine.
My doctor will give me a referral now if I ask but he thinks I should give it another little bit. He seems to think it will happen any day now.
I do, in fact, have a cervix. Lol. We will be trying to get at it from a different angle this cycle! Lol

 

[AnnieMac2]

So I didn't talk to her on the phone yet - the poor girl got called out of town on a work trip. Yikes. Can she have more than a day off after a d&c? And then one of the engines failed (!) on the flight. So we texted while she waited for another flight at the airport they did the emergency landing at. She said her boyfriend (I think? Not sure of their status) has been "wonderful." So I'm happy to hear that.

I'm also happy to hear that your doc is on top of things and thinks you're good to go any time here, Libby. That's great!

Corn, how are you lady?

 

[Cornfieldland]

Hi guys...hope ur weekend is a good one! I had to work a late shift last night so I'm a bit grouchy today. And we are going to a friends house for dinner, really wish we weren't now, not feeling up to it mentally, but cant back out. So I guess I'm in the tww now. Have no idea if there's a real chance this month. I think I might have ovulated later than usual so hmmmm...I kinda feel like the month after a cm is a bust. I'm just so tired of set back after set back. Tired of worrying if we do have a baby how hard it will be, and if we don't how emotionally unstable I'll be. Yet here's my DH who for the most part is always in a good mood....I have no idea how he does it. Anyhows...we all gots problems ; ) I must be tired and hormonal wahhhhhhh

 

[Libbystepof4]

I'm glad boyfriend type guy is being good to your friend, Annie. She needs some support.
Corn, I think I've heard of women getting pregnant the very next month after mc and doing great, so don't count yourself totally out! I'm thinking good thoughts for you!
Annie, still good, I hope?
I'm just over here on CD9 ready to get going! I have prepared DH for trying things differently. He seems to think things should be the same every time (if it ain't broke sort of sentiment) so his OCD brain has to process it all! Lol. His work demands are starting to get crazy again. So he won't even be home until ten tonight. I hate that.
So far, Nora is failing on getting appointments for baby girl. I'm getting annoyed. She looked positively hung over when we took the kids back to her yesterday. She barely grunted out a hello to them. I've got no issue with her going out and having fun on her free time but by Sunday night, get it together! It worries me. I just don't trust her to do right.

 

[AnnieMac2]

I don't trust Nora either. I was skeptical that she'd be proactive because I have no doubt she is afraid of what her daughter will tell a therapist. Even if Violet isn't actively throwing her under the bus or even understanding what she is revealing, a therapist will be critical of Nora in no time. And yeah, if you can party hard, fine. But you better work hard too. Is Violet still having panic attacks? What are you doing differently this time, Libby?

Corn - I know four women who had successful pregnancies within 1-2 months of a d&c. Maybe I know more, but those are just the timelines I know of. Pretty good odds.

I'm feeling fine. Having a cancer scare with my 12 year old dog. And I am obsessed with this dog. Well she definitely has an aggressive cancerous mass on her neck that can be removed with a 20% chance of it regrowing, but they're hesitant to operate on an old dog. We're waiting on a radiologist to review her lung x-ray because she coughed up blood yesterday and it looks like there are some masses. So we need to figure out if they're cancerous cells or "old dog" cells before we decide on surgery. Poor old lady. I'm glad she seems pretty happy and comfortable though.

 

[Libbystepof4]

Oh I'm sorry about your old lady, Annie. I have an old lady dog and an old man cat. Old lady is fine, albeit a little slower than she used to be. Old man is crotchety and has a weird thing on his eye. I'm worried its something bad like cancer. He's my baby. I do love a grumpy old marmalade cat. I'm going to have to put him out if he doesn't chill the F down with the kids. He keeps hitting them. Not attacking really, just taking a mean swat when they walk by too quickly. What a grump. I hope you get the best case scenario for your old lady.
I've started with the OPKs again. I've read that with the tilted uterus it is sometimes beneficial to come at things from the back instead of the front. I guess from the front he ends up sort of banging on almost the side of the cervix instead meeting it head on. Sorry if that's too graphic. But you get the idea. Sperm have a harder time if they need to swim down and then around and THEN up, so I guess coming at it from the back aims you at the right spot so they just need to swim full steam ahead. So we will do that.lol
Violet had two panic attacks this last weekend. Neither were as bad as they had been. I keep texting and Nora says she's waiting for this or that person go call her back. Pretty soon I'm just going to make an appointment myself and tell her when to have her here. It's not cool to drag this out when they child is basically in terror half the time. And I think you're right. She doesn't want these kids going to therapy. They would have no idea how incriminating it would be to describe everyday parts of their lives. But she knows its not a great situation. She knows she doesn't want to be criticized. She can't take it.
Oh gosh. I've had a panic attack and taken a Xanax. Now I'm getting sleepy. I'd better go. I haven't had one in a while. They come out of nowhere when you're doing nothing stressful at all. How strange.

 

[AnnieMac2]

Lol - ok so I finally get it, Libby. You are literally approaching the situation from a different angle. Lol. That's good information to know! I never heard that before. I'm so sorry you had a panic attack. They are the worst. You have a lot of different stressors to deal with, even if they're not always on the surface.

Believe me, I grew up with a disgusting excuse for a mother and the bad ones are all the same. They have a lot to hide and therapy threatens their little bubble they control. I'm only in contact with my mom because she and my father are somehow still married (I think he has Stockholm Syndrome lol) and I want him to know his grandchildren. It might get to the point that I say you can have a relationship with us outside of her, but you realize you'll have to grow some balls to sidestep her. It will be very dramatic for the family because my siblings are weaklings and under her thumb. My brother wouldn't be mad at me though. But he'd still cower under her when I wasn't around to fight on his behalf. I hope Violet doesn't grow up to be an adult with all the anger I have.

Corn - have a fabulous second honeymoon. So romantic! And I hope your old doggie is doing well again too. I especially love the old animals. Puppies are cute, but I prefer the elderly guys even though it's so hard to watch them age.