Had to share ladies... Breakthrough in the hubby department!
He worked from home the other day but was set up in the spare room (aka his "home office" aka "the place he can go to watch Walking Dead in peace while pretending to look busy")... I needed to put Toby down for a nap but it clashed with twins bottle times so took the three of them up to my bedroom with the intention of reding to Toby while feeding babies. Didn't work, one baby was screaming while the other was being fed, Toby found a toy hammer and was bashing everything then got so tired that his worst tantrum ever ensued and I was a WRECK.
DH heard all this from the other room and I think something finally clicked. Think he realised that when I say the kids have been a nightmare... I'm not actually lying to cover the fact that I've done spd all around the house. He also confessed that when he takes the kids out. He makes sure it's not around nap time so Toby isn't grumpy and it's not around feeding time because he couldnt handle it.
So hes helped out tons the past couple of days and I'm feeling pretty good right now!