Rainbows after the storm (late loss/stillbirth/neonatal loss/sids)

[amjon]

sweet so glad you got to hear the heart beat. I have been in maternity jeans for weeks as I just find them so comfortable. Like you I have extra padding for baby to kick through for hubby to feel it lol. But after writing on here last night I only felt bubbles I got a stronger sensation in by stomach which definitely left like baby moving so I am hoping this is the start of stronger feelings.

Amjon it is great news that babies are growing well. Have you got a bigger bump this time around yet? I guess you will have to start thinking of a second boys name now

Xlaura I am glad your scan went well

I have lots of work to do today so I had better get on with it. I have put the hyperactive puppy in his cage so that I can get something done lol

Yes I'll be huge this time. I'm already measuring 20 weeks and look it! I thought we had the names sorted out and then DH starts up with wanting baby B to have an Indian first name. He said Sai, then Ram, then some more. I told him it wasn't happening. I'm hoping she just saw the cord or something there and when we go back B is really a girl as she said she wasn't 100% sure. I do really need a girl (especially since I had her and lost her).

 

[_Lexi_]

We weren't going to find out the sex, but we've changed our minds!! We have so much boy stuff from my pregnancy with Joshua, it would be easier to know if we need pink. Plus, now we've moved into a house, we can have a proper nursery so it would be nice to decorate k owing the sex. Considering Joshua wasn't named until he was8 hours old, we think we might of already picked names this time. I am showing, but just haven't seen many of my friends. Told my closest friends. Can't figure out how to do the Facebook announcement, especially so close to Joshua's birthday. Getting impatient for my scan now though!! I have a VERY wriggly baby, convinced this ones a girl, but we'll see!! I think it would be easier having a girl as we wouldn't be constantly comparing her to Joshua as she grows up and what he should of been doing.

Glad to see everyone else is doing well xx

 

[dextersmum]

hello ladies I am feeling really nervous today for some reason do you ever have days like that where you just doubt things and feel worried. I really want to feel this baby giving me kicks and I am still only really feeling bubbles and I am not feeling them regularly although am sure I have felt them every day but today I have been questioning if I have been??? I really wish I had a doppler as I would have had it on today to put my mind at rest but then I think hubby is right and if I had one I would have had it on every hour today lol. Have a midwife apt on monday and really hope she listens for the heartbeat. She should if it is my 18 week apt shouldn't she?

I have a strong feeling this baby is a little girl too Lexi and like you we have a room full of boy's things so want to know if we need to look for different colours. I also feel it might be easier to have a girl so we are not comparing her with Dexter and wondering if he would of been the same at that age etc. We have a blue and red baby's room and we are thinking that even if it is a girl we will keep the same colours and add more red as we still feel it would be nice for her to share her big brothers room. But if jelly bean is a boy he will have the same room.

I also know what you mean Amjon as I too have also thought it would be nice to have another boy as I didn't get to bring Dexter home.

So I guess we will all know from our scans waht we are having.

Just hope my nerves pass and everything is ok with jelly bean

 

[dextersmum]

it is 10 months tomorrow since Dexter became an angel and I just hope I get to hear his brother or sisters heartbeat as I think that would be a lovely thing on a sad day. Still feeling a little nervous today how is everybody else doing?

 

[sweetbuthyper]

I'm feeling ok ish headachy and woke up worried coz bean wasn't fidgety this morning tho making up for it now so all is ok.

I think its normal to be nervous before appointments i was scared they'd hear nothing, Most uk midwives will try to hear a heartbeat at 16 weeks so i would have thought they would listen in in fact mine was confused to why the hospital hadn't tried when i was admitted.

Just remember there are lots of hiding places and it can take a few mins to find them and you will be fine fx you get to hear heartbeat tomorrow

 

[amjon]

My OB couldn't find either heartbeat at my appointment this week so she just grabbed the US and they were fine. They're just hard to find sometimes. It's nice most of the OBs have in office US they can use if they can't find it. I get nervous before every US. I never was with my daughter until I was in the hospital and they couldn't find the heartbeat.

 

[dextersmum]

I have worked out why I am a bit nervous and anxious. Around this time last year in Dexter's pregnancy was when I started to feel reduced movement and then on the 18th Jan I was told that he had not grown for 3 weeks and that he would need to come out if he stood any chance of living, so I think it is all that playing on my mind. I just wish I was blissfully ignorant of things that can go wrong in pregnancy and had nothing to worry about or knew nothing I should or could be worried about

 

[nicola ttc]

Hi all :wave:
Haven't had a proper read through but will do tomorrow when i have a bit of time.
Tracy - i completely get that. I've been feeling really anxious lately and then realised it was at 20+3 i got admitted to hospital with Emily. Even though i haven't had any of the same issues this time, it's still scaring me.
Hope everyone is well.

 

[dextersmum]

hello ladies well on Dexter's 10 month angelversary he sent me a very special gift and I heard his siblings heartbeat at my midwife appointment. I feel a lot more relaxed today as I had a good talk with the midwife and told her what was going on for me and she told me it is completely understandable and that it is ok that I can't turn my emotions off and I am allowed to be anxious etc. She also said I can go to her clinic any time even if I just want to check on baby by listening for heart beat. Which is really reassuring as the clinic is 5 mins walk from my house and means if I do that at least I know she will be using the doppler right - she advised me not to get my own doppler for that reason lol

so I have 17 days to wait until my next scan and I will try to remember to keep saying to myself "this is a different pregnancy" if I feel myself slipping to a negative place

How is everybody else doing today?

 

[nicola ttc]

Awww what a special gift from Dexter.
I'm glad you're feeling a bit less anxious. I think 'thi is a different pregnancy' is a mantra we all need on this thread at some point!! I'lldefinitely be remembering it.
Thats good the midwife said pop in any time. :thumbsup: Even if you don't actually go, just knowing you have that option must make you feel a bit less anxious.

My scan is next Tuesday! I didn't book a genderscan at 16 weeks (the weekend before christmas) as i thought the weeks would whizz by with it being christmas, then new year, then kids back at school and being busy but nope, it's been the longest 4 weeks of my life!! Stil, only 8 sleeps to go.
My ribs are really aching toda and i know it's not baby up there yet but something definitely is!
I thought it might be nice to do weekly bump pics, what do you think?
Here's my 20 week pic (well 19+5)
Look forward to seeing yours!!

https://i1324.photobucket.com/albums/u620/nicolabird/20130113_112159_zps4a774c52.jpg

 

[sweetbuthyper]

nice bump mine to me just looks fat but i will take a picture tomorrow when i'm dressed and not lounging in pjs, plus i think i may pop some more over night as i've had stretching pain which usually results in me waking up in the morning looking like someone has pumped me up some more.

dextersmum glad you got to hear heartbeat, and its grate your midwife said go in anytime i got told the same

I'm less than impressed by the snow its settling and i have a scan appointment tomorrow, if necessary i will walk it only takes about 30 mins but could do with it melting or not getting to bad so we can get a taxi up there and back.

 

[amjon]

This is mine at 14+5 with the twins. The OB measured my uterus to my belly button last week (20 weeks).

 

[Springflower]

Hello Ladies!!

Sorry not been on for ages. I went back to work last week and when I've not been on the computer my oh has needed it to revise for an exam.

I'm trying to catch up with everyones news!

Dextesmum - So pleased you got to hear the heartbeat. Really not long now until you start getting the proper kicks. I think this time I got them about 22ws. re the progestrone, there is some suggestion that taking it from 24ws reduces the chance of premature birth, but studies are still being carried out. Hope you are doing ok. I remember we both lost our babies very close last year. I'm starting to get twitchy and anxious. I love Dot so much, but there is a big part of me that just wants Marnie back. It really is a head f*ck.

Nicola - Ohhh my bump looks like yours, only a bit bigger. haha! I'm sure my boobs are shrinking though, even my oh said they looked smaller! haha! Very exciting about your scan. You're finding out the gender right?

Sweetbuthyper (I love your username btw!) Cripes you have had a scary time. Hope you are ok to get to the appointment tomorrow. Careful on the ice!

Amjon - Awww two boys thats lovely news! Twins is very special. In the short time we had both our girls I have never felt happier. You have a lot to look forward to.

Lexi - We were the time, I really wanted to know the sex as if it was a boy I'd sell our girl bits. We are definately done provided dot arrives safely. I too hadnt told many ppl but in the end did a facebook announcement as I was huge. Plus I want to be like everyone else and be normal!

AFM, will be 25ws on Wens so I reached viability!! I'm so proud! next milestone is 29ws when I gave birth to the girls. We did my hospital bag at the weekend in case of another early arrival. I'm hoping that by planning and being ready it will help the baby to come later! haha! Was really upset last week as Lily Allan has called her baby Marnie. Thats two celebrities now. We spent ages choosing her name I really wanted something different. I know no name is unique but it really bugs me that since she died more Marnie's have been popping up. I don't want it to turn into a really popular name. I know I'm being an idiot.

Right gotta go, my little girl needs her bedtime bottle. Sorry to anyone I've missed. Hope everyone is doing ok.

 

[dextersmum]

Nicola that is a great bump you have. I don't have a proper bump yet (think it is because I was a size 16 before I got pregnant) so I think I just look fat (or fatter lol) but I will take a pic and post it asap.

Sweet good luck with your appointment tomorrow I hope you get there safely the snow is going here but it has rained so is turned to ice which is more dangerous.

Aileen how is work going? is it nice to be back? So glad you have got to 25 weeks I am sure having your bag packed means you won't need it until closer to 40 weeks. Did you have a section with the girls? Do you know what your birth plan is this time around?
I know what you mean about other people using the name Marnie but I would take it to mean that you chose a beautiful name and maybe Marnie herself has been whispering into peoples ears to use the same name
we are trying to find an unusual name as we thought Dexters name was unusual but so far the girls name that I like seems to be popping up all over the place so I don't know. I think I said before that we were looking for other names with an X in

Amjon I love your bump pic and the way your husband has his hands on it - that is very romantic.

I have been told today that I am being referred to a physio because of my back pain as it is pelvic something or other so I have had to tell my hubby that I can no longer hoover or mop and you can imagine how he took that

 

[Springflower]

Haha Dextersmum, when I first got pregnant I told my husband it was dangerous to hoover. Haven't done it for a yr and a half now! Hehe!

 

[Springflower]

Being back at work has been really good. I'm working 3 days a week from home and only coming into the office if they need me to. Its helping as it gives me a break from carrying Indy all the time. She's heavy now and I'm supposed not to lift anything heavy. Hmmm.

The girls were a natural delivery. Was a really lovely experience esp as they gave me a spinal so I felt no pain what so ever. I had a spinal as they werent sure what was going on with the girls and didnt want me to run into problems halfway through.

This time I'm going to try for a natural birth again. Because of the bug the girls caught, they arent sure if I might now be a carrier and the baby too. So natural would actually be safer than a c section. It means as well that both baby and I need to be closely monitored after birth incase of problems. Baby will be heading back to the baby unit so I'm a bit gutted about that. Praying she doesnt have it as well as I honestly dont think I can go through it again. I could kill the old hospital for the mess they've landed us in!! grrrrrrrrrr!!!!!!!!!!!! But anyway everyone knows the score and midwifes etc will be briefed. All the consultants on the baby unit know us and our story so I know dot will be in the best place. Just cant help hankering for some normality.

Ohh names with an x, thats hard. Ohh I'm not Aileen btw I'm Alex. Has an x... haha! I love Dexter, its a great name and a real character. I know what you are saying about Marnie. I'll get there. We've got a name for Dot but I remembered its a Turkish resort so we may be rethinking it - haha!

XXX

 

[dextersmum]

sorry Alex I had it in my head you were Aileen lol. I like Alexa and Lexi for a girl which are forms of Alex and my hubby keeps saying Alex for a boy but that is because he is a man utd fan and wants to call the boy after Alex ferguson lol.

Lexi is the name that is becoming more popular, I liked it when pregnant with Dexter too but will have to wait and see. Are you going to share your name or keep it secret? Will you have Marnie as the middle name. I have just asked my hubby if we could use Dexter as the middle name if this baby is a boy and he said yes, only just thought of it as I am asking you. But I feel really strongly that this baby is a girl but will know in a couple of weeks I suppose.

I was trying to find a name that had a meaning like happiness, rainbow, future, star etc but can't find anything. Alex and variations of it mean defender of man (well on the website I have looked at??) has anybody got any good baby name books they would recommend?

 

[sweetbuthyper]

i googled baby names with an x ( i'm bored waiting for food to arrive ) here they are, We have decided on Alexander for a boy but will be using xander for short

Girl names

Maxine
Moxie
Exene
Dixie
Trixie
Alexis
Alexa
Lexus
Alexandra
Beatrix
Lexie
Roxanne
Roxy
Xiomara
Xena
Xeni
Xenia
Alix
Oxsana
Xandra
Axelle
Jaxine
Xyla
Xanthe
Nyx

Boy names

Pax
Jax
Dax
Tex
Rex
Max
Maxim
Maxwell
Xaviar
Dexter
Baxter
Xander
Fox
Maddox
Axel
Hendrix
Felix
Huxley
Lexington
Lennox
Knox
Phoenix
Dixon
Nixon
Braxton
Bronx

 

[Springflower]

I really like Lexi, but won't use it as its too close to my name. But if I wasn't called that, I'd want to use it.

We wont be having Marnie as a middle name. We talked about it but decided not too. Our thinking was that this bubba is a different person and should have her own name. Marnie will always be in our hearts but I want her name just for her. We also decided not to use the letter M at all. Mostly because all the M names we like are similar to Marnie.

Our top contender is Lara Bay. But it may change. Bay would be her middle name. I definitely want something that goes with Indya and Marnie. So hard!

 

[Springflower]

Ohhh Xanthe is pretty!