Rainbows after the storm (late loss/stillbirth/neonatal loss/sids)

[Krippy]

Can't wait to see pics of little Sadie! A huge congrats to Spring! Sending you lots of love! So happy for you!

 

[amjon]

Welcome Sadie! Can't wait to see pictures. Not much longer for a few of us now.

 

[dextersmum]

hi ladies how is everybody doing?

I went for our 32 week scan today. It seemed to take an age to do all the measurements and for the sonographer to actually turn the screen for me to see the baby and once the guy had done our report with measurements he asked me to go back into the scan room which of course made me a little panicky. He said that Lexi was measuring smaller on the est weight scale although all other measurements were as they should be. She is back on the 10th percentile line. He said it happens a lot where the fundal measurements are on track and weight is lower. I spoke to a dr who I haven't seen before and I don't think she even works with my consultant and she didn't know my history and kept asking me questions she should have know the answers to. She said another consultant had seen the information and they are not concerned as Lexi has show a steady growth even if she is on the 10th percentile. I feel ok about it because I know Lexi has grown and I checked that her stomach has grown as my midwife told me that this is the measurement that would decrease or not grow as well if there was something wrong.

So I go back in 4 weeks for my last Lexi scan before I then go and have the section at 38 weeks. The time seems to be passing quickly now which is good, considering about 8 weeks ago when I had the first bleed I didn't think we would get this far

 

[dextersmum]

ladies have any of you got a gift (or gave a gift when you had the baby) for your husband as a way of thanking him for the baby?? My hubby got me a lovely card and photo frame when we had our little boy and I have been trying to find a card to give to him but can't find out has anybody seen them where it says to my husband on the birth of our child or something similar?

 

[nicola ttc]

Thats how i feel Tracy, i thought i'd never get to this point and now i am time is flying along!
I'm glad all seems well with Lexi - sounds like she is just going to be a petite little girl, my consultant said its always abdo circ that would show signs of iugr or other problems rather than overall size as i've measured on the small side a couple of times but then she's caught up.
I had a consultant appt today with one of the team who hadn't seen me before so also had to go through everything with her. She then hadn'tread in my notes that baby has been breach since 28 weeks and couldnt find a hb on the doppler so took me in for a scan. Luckily i could feel her moving about but was still very scary til she showed me on the screen! Baby is lying sort of sideways bum down so would likely be a c-section even if i didn't have to anyway! Section will be booked next thursday for between 37-38 weeks so will finally get a date to aim for then! Can't wait. Am also terrified though!
Baby still has no name or even a shortlist of names..
How is everyone? Spring i hope you are enjoying your first day with baby Sadie.

 

[_Lexi_]

Congratulations spring!! Can't wait to see photos of Sadie!!

I also had my 32 week scan today. Baby is growing well, dropped from 78th percentile to 50th, but they're not concerned, estimated weight at the moment is 4lb 3oz, estimated weight at birth is just over 8lb! I'm still hoping for a vbac and all is looking well for that. She's been head down for weeks now and doesn't show any signs of moving which is good. I'm really starting to feel the effects of pregnancy now. Walking is getting slow and tough, heartburn is a nightmare, so tired all the time! I never experienced any of this last time. Met my new midwife on Tuesday, she's reSlly nice, much nicer than my old one!! Just don't get why they don't ever read your notes so hard explaining about Joshua all the time. Missing him lots at the moment. Had my whooping cough jab yesterday, didn't hurt, but my arm aches a bit today which is annoying. Actually starting to believe that this little one might make it home.

Here's a bump photo from Monday:
https://i4.photobucket.com/albums/y107/ducksdontquack/C8C056AE-8F58-4D75-9A15-D5B79C97E244-4911-000004827BC9AA80.jpg

Hope everyone else is doing well xx

 

[dextersmum]

Hi ladies just had a Facebook message from Nicola and she has asked me to let you all know that her baby girl was born today weighing 4lb 8 still to be named. Nicola had a uterus rupture and lost a lot of blood which starved baby of oxygen. Both mother and baby are stable and I will keep you posted when I hear more

 

[_Lexi_]

Thanks for the update. Really hope mum and baby are doing ok xx

 

[Krippy]

Wow! Thinking of you and baby girl Nicola!

 

[nicola ttc]

Hi ladies, thanks for updating Tracy.
Primrose Eve was born yesterday lunchtime after the most excruciating pain ever of a placental abruption. I lost my body volume of blood (4 litres) and 3 of those were in the abdomen so was not in a good way, the dr has said she did not expect me to make it out of theatre. There was a 4cm hole in the top of my classical section scar and the vertical scar was also rupturing. Babys hb had dropped to 74 and was not getting better by the time we arrived at hospital. I was at home with my daughters and niece when it started so they were terrified and had to call for help etc poor things. Primrose has been moved to a hospitalwith high level nicu for more tests tosee how it all affected her and i am moving there tomorrowif i am stable. There are still issues with my recovery and may need another op its going tobe a long recovery process either way but just feel thankful we are both alive - anything else, we can deal with!

 

[sweetbuthyper]

hope you have a speedy recovery nicola and get to be with your little girl asap x

 

[dextersmum]

Sweet how are you and Zachary?

Spring when are we going to see a photo of beautiful sadie?

Nicola I hope you have been well enough to get to the same hospital as primrose. Please keep us posted on how you are both doing when you can x

Lexi that is a great bump photo you look very neat and pregnant lol.

Amjon how are things with you?

Miss mo are you ok?

I ended up at the hospital on Saturday morning being monitored as I get a bit freaked out with reduced movements. Midwife said everything looked fine on the graphs and there had been plenty of movement from lexi even though I didn't feel them all. So that freaked me out some more, that even with an estimated weight of 4lb 2oz I am still not able to feel her every time she moves?? So the doctor on the weekend shift gave me a new plan which was to go today for another ECG monitoring, go Thursday for a Doppler scan to make sure placenta is fully working and then have a further growth scan in 2 weeks instead of waiting 4 weeks. So I feel much more reassured and the midwife today gave me the direct number for the antenatal day unit to contact them if I want more monitoring so at least I have more support if needed which is great. I just have 5 more weeks to get through before my planned section and then I might be able to stop panicking over the slightest thing?!

 

[amjon]

Sweet how are you and Zachary?

Spring when are we going to see a photo of beautiful sadie?

Nicola I hope you have been well enough to get to the same hospital as primrose. Please keep us posted on how you are both doing when you can x

Lexi that is a great bump photo you look very neat and pregnant lol.

Amjon how are things with you?

Miss mo are you ok?

I ended up at the hospital on Saturday morning being monitored as I get a bit freaked out with reduced movements. Midwife said everything looked fine on the graphs and there had been plenty of movement from lexi even though I didn't feel them all. So that freaked me out some more, that even with an estimated weight of 4lb 2oz I am still not able to feel her every time she moves?? So the doctor on the weekend shift gave me a new plan which was to go today for another ECG monitoring, go Thursday for a Doppler scan to make sure placenta is fully working and then have a further growth scan in 2 weeks instead of waiting 4 weeks. So I feel much more reassured and the midwife today gave me the direct number for the antenatal day unit to contact them if I want more monitoring so at least I have more support if needed which is great. I just have 5 more weeks to get through before my planned section and then I might be able to stop panicking over the slightest thing?!

Nicola, hope you and baby are doing well.

I'm doing good. Feeling pretty good most of the time, just get a bit tired with odd aches and pains. I told the MFM that every week was better knowing the boys are getting more and more ready to join us. She said she doesn't have many twin moms say that. At 32 weeks I'll be starting twice a week monitoring with one NST and one BPP (one at the MFM and one at the regular OB). She did say the boys were starting to show some subtle signs of the GD affecting them as there was a bit of calcification of the placenta and both of their fluid levels doubled or nearly doubled. She wants me to start doing before and after meal levels and adjusting insulin based on the befores, but the endo told me he doesn't have any appointments until June! It's good they are going to give you more monitoring. I feel lucky to live here where I can get weekly growth and fluid checks. I think it's crazy that they think once a month is enough for those of you in the UK that have already been through the heartache of losing a child.

 

[sweetbuthyper]

Dextersmum we are doing ok, zach is back on high flow at 4litres today they pushed him to quick and so we had to go back a few steps, he had a blood transfusion last week and scans show he has a small brain bleed but nothing too concerning, just a case of waiting for him to grow and get stronger now and hopefully no more steps back on the breathing front. He's 2lb 12oz now and gaining well, and tolerating his food well. heres a pic from 2 days ago

 

[dextersmum]

Amjon I love your bump photos and the monkey suits are adorable.

Sweet Zach is really coming on. It was the same experience for us with the breathing and he will get there in his own time. Are you able to stay at the hospital with him or are you travelling in every day?

Lexi was quiet again at bedtime and this morning so I was a little freaked out but she started moving just after 8 so I didn't rush to the hospital to be monitored I just observed movements during the day and I had a midwife apt planned at 3pm so at a good chat with her and shed a few tears. I just think I am feeling overwhelmed with everything hoping that the next 5 weeks pass by smoothly but then thinking about how it is going to be when lexi is here and I can't control either of these things which makes me a little more stressed. But I now have a planned Doppler scan on Thursday and a growth scan on the 9th and 23rd

 

[nicola ttc]

Morning ladies.
I have joined Primrose at the nicu, i am still in high dependancy on the labour ward but doing much better. Seem to be healing better now but still feeling sore and weak!
Primrose is doing well, she is on cpap but has short times with it off and having 5 ml feeds through ng tube 3 hourly. Her brain scans were yesterday and will be discussed in todays ward rounds at half 9 but i'm hopeful that anything really significant would have been told to me straight away.
Will update with a pic soon.

 

[dextersmum]

Nicola so glad you have made it to the same hospital as Primrose that must give you a better peace of mind knowing you are both in the same place. Sounds like she is doing well and I hope the brain scans are all as they Primrose? Have your other children been able to meet their sister yet?

My little miss is still causing me mischief as she is not keeping to the same movement pattern every day like she was before so there are days when I feel great and feel loads and there are others (like today) where she doesn't do her movements at the same time or to the same strength and then I get a little anxious and paranoid.
Was at the hospital having a doppler flow scan today and everything was as it should be sonographer told me Lexi was moving the cord with her hand lol but I couldn't feel that movement??

I am feeling a lot of her bottom pushing my stomach out like now but when I asked the doctor if she would class this as a movement she said not really as she would count kicks, punches or big body movements so I need her to do a lot more of these this afternoon and evening so I can feel a bit more relaxed.
I went out to a couple of shops today and really felt pregnant. My bump went solid and tight when I was walking and it made it a bit difficult to walk has anybody else had this experience?
I was a bit freaked out this morning as I put in a pessary last night as still contiuously suffering from thrush I thought long and hard about doing it as last time I did was when I had my first bleed. Any way I had a bit of mucus discharge with red/pink in it. I actually took my tissue to triage when I went in for my scan and showed the lady there but she said it will just have been a bit of blood from my cervix where the pessary may have scratched it.
So I am having a great day today as you can tell lol

 

[nicola ttc]

Hi ladies
We are doing well
https://i1324.photobucket.com/albums/u620/nicolabird/20130501_132311_zpsf353b1b6.jpg
Primrose is on and off of cpap but allowed out for cuddles. She tried a breastfeed yesterday and today and was sucking really well. Only for a few minutes and then was tired out but still good.
Today it is 1 year since we lost Emily. Has been a difficult day but i know Emily and Edward are watching over their little sister helping her stay strong.
Sweet how is Zac getting on?
Tracy i'm sorry Lexi is being a little monkey but glad you're getting extra scans to help you relax.
How is everyone else?

 

[sweetbuthyper]

hey all,

Zach is doing good, on high flow but now on 2 hourly feeds of 17ml, had a rough few days not because of him but the stupid ward, its been really busy and i have some understanding and patience for that but getting in out for cuddles has been a nightmare and has had me in tears. that and we are in the worst place in the room next to the computer and hes really wanting to suck on breast and for the last 2 days i've not been able to let him or had to unlatch him for him to go back because i can't get a screen round me coz they need the computer or the phone thinking of just doing it tomorrow and screw the stupid screen if they don't wanna see if they can go find me one. Most of the staff are great but the one we had today is rubbish i asked twice to have him out 3 hours later still didn't have him and ended up in tears other half managed to get her to get him out and she said she didn't know i wanted him out, well of cause i do why the hell would i not want cuddles stupid women. anyways hoping the ward calms down before i freak at them. Zach is fine tho and oblivious to it all other than getting ratty that he can't have boob. I have also noticed they are quick to up his oxygen when he destats rather than check his head position or that his prongs are even in his nose the last to days which is a bit annoying coz they they get annoyed his pinging high when he moves his head, but oh well we will get there and hopefully he can get off the high flow soon and it won't be an issue anymore.

sorry that turned into a mini rant, in short we are all good growing well

 

[Krippy]

Wow ladies! Zachary and Primrose are just beautiful! What little troopers they are! I am constantly thinking of you both and your immense strength!