Rant - Feeling so hopeless about sleep!

[bananaz]

Another question. What do you all think of waking up LO from an afternoon nap that's too late? I'm wondering if I should wake Munchkin when we get home if he falls asleep on the way back from daycare. I let him finish that nap naturally last night (so 5-5:30 or a bit later) and he was pretty full of beans at 7 PM bedtime. (On the other hand, if going to bed slightly later somehow magically resulted in the late wake up, that's not a bad outcome! )

I used to be nervous about waking LO from naps but now I just do it. For me it's more about making sure I maintain her evening routine than it is about worrying that the nap will interfere with her sleep. I usually give her dinner at 6pm so that's when I'll wake her if necessary, and she goes to bed at 7:30pm. Thankfully late naps don't seem to affect her sleep at night, though she will be more wired at bedtime and take longer to fall asleep.

 

[bananaz]

I think more common than bragging about sleep is complaining about what to me is a really really good night...e.g. "My 4 month old woke up to feed at 2 AM! SO EXHAUSTED "

Oh yeah that would drive me crazy! I haven't seen any of those on FB, thankfully. I'm sure I wouldn't be able to help myself and post a snotty reply

 

[Noelle610]

Another question. What do you all think of waking up LO from an afternoon nap that's too late? I'm wondering if I should wake Munchkin when we get home if he falls asleep on the way back from daycare. I let him finish that nap naturally last night (so 5-5:30 or a bit later) and he was pretty full of beans at 7 PM bedtime. (On the other hand, if going to bed slightly later somehow magically resulted in the late wake up, that's not a bad outcome! )

I'm all for it! I never let Charlotte sleep much past 4pm. I just open her door, turn off the white noise and start doing chores in her room so it's not startling.

 

[bananaz]

I'm all for it! I never let Charlotte sleep much past 4pm. I just open her door, turn off the white noise and start doing chores in her room so it's not startling.

Haha, Elsie's afternoon naps start at 4pm right now! Her awake times have lengthened to 4-4.5 hours but she's just not ready to drop that second nap yet, so we're in yet another weird transitional period.

 

[Boo44]

Well we had a good night last night I think I heard him at some point but not enough to really stir, then he slept until 7.25!! Amazing!! So strange as yesterday it was 6. I am not complaining at all. But I would like to understand why some days it's early and some not. Then again I have a feeling it's just babies like anyone else sleep different hours each day and I should cut him some slack

Don't you just feel though, that you're always searching for that one answer when it comes to babies and sleep! Like if only I knew why he did x/y/z then everything would be perfect!! Haha

Oh and the fb thing - we just this wkend had a post about a 12 week old sleeping 13hr nights and lying in until like 8am every day. I felt so jealous!!! I am often posting pictures of jack but I have never once in 9 months posted about his sleep. Mainly because I don't want to jinx it! Haha

 

[Noelle610]

I'm all for it! I never let Charlotte sleep much past 4pm. I just open her door, turn off the white noise and start doing chores in her room so it's not startling.

Haha, Elsie's afternoon naps start at 4pm right now! Her awake times have lengthened to 4-4.5 hours but she's just not ready to drop that second nap yet, so we're in yet another weird transitional period.

Crazy! How long does she sleep for?

 

[Noelle610]

Don't you just feel though, that you're always searching for that one answer when it comes to babies and sleep! Like if only I knew why he did x/y/z then everything would be perfect!! Haha

YES

 

[bananaz]

Crazy! How long does she sleep for?

Lately it's been 1-1.5 hours, which is great for her. She's still been doing her 7-9 hour stretches at night so it doesn't seem to be doing any harm in that regard. I wish I could get her down for a nap earlier in the afternoon but there's just no way. If I wait until 4 or 4:30pm she usually goes down with minimal fuss

 

[Noelle610]

If it works, go with it.

 

[gaiagirl]

Don't you just feel though, that you're always searching for that one answer when it comes to babies and sleep! Like if only I knew why he did x/y/z then everything would be perfect!! Haha

YES

Totally this. I had to make myself stop obsessing about finding that exact perfect combo...

But then after we had two 5/6 hour stretches this weekend of course I was back to trying to replicate the exact conditions of those days...sigh.

 

[bananaz]

Totally this. I had to make myself stop obsessing about finding that exact perfect combo...

But then after we had two 5/6 hour stretches this weekend of course I was back to trying to replicate the exact conditions of those days...sigh.

Oh man, don't you hate that?! There have been multiple times where I've thought "OMG, she slept ____ hours after this person visited. How do I get them to visit every day?!" I think I'm going crazy

 

[charlie15]

Aggggh can I join this thread? I have 5 month old, her sleep at night was fine, well as I would expect with wakings for a feed so fine. I co sleep with here in her room while my OH sleeps in our room with the cat. But the last month has taken it's toll on me, today I was at breaking point to be honest, in tears and I really felt like a bad mum who to be honest when S cried I felt like I just don't care anymore. Obviously I do, but I am just so exhausted! I can't say what it is that S does as I'm so tired I have no idea, there is no pattern and it's totally random. It's not to do with feeding, wake ups for that are fine, it's restlessness, dummy problems, wake up to have a party for 2 hours interspersed with STTN, but I obviously don't myself as I'm too busy checking her breathing! I feel at the end of my tether and look like crap, and all the while OH looks as fresh as a daisy, growl growl! Not fair! Tonight he is going to sleep with her while I hopefully crash out in our room and he will come and get me if she does wake for a feed. I just hope the cat lets me sleep or she may just be thrown out of the window!

I don't know I need some advice but also need to rant. I really feel like the dummy needs to go, but I need to be in a better state mentally to take that on and also OH needs to be free to help with that. I am also thinking maybe we need to get her into her cot, but the dummy first! It also doesn't help that she does not nap at all, occasionally in her buggy, never in the sling, she's very alert and into everything, so as much as I love baby wearing it's more to occupy her than settle her.

Sorry I have gone on, but feel a litte stir crazy, if you have got this far, thankyou for reading, all tips welcome

 

[bananaz]

Aggggh can I join this thread? I have 5 month old, her sleep at night was fine, well as I would expect with wakings for a feed so fine. I co sleep with here in her room while my OH sleeps in our room with the cat. But the last month has taken it's toll on me, today I was at breaking point to be honest, in tears and I really felt like a bad mum who to be honest when S cried I felt like I just don't care anymore. Obviously I do, but I am just so exhausted! I can't say what it is that S does as I'm so tired I have no idea, there is no pattern and it's totally random. It's not to do with feeding, wake ups for that are fine, it's restlessness, dummy problems, wake up to have a party for 2 hours interspersed with STTN, but I obviously don't myself as I'm too busy checking her breathing! I feel at the end of my tether and look like crap, and all the while OH looks as fresh as a daisy, growl growl! Not fair! Tonight he is going to sleep with her while I hopefully crash out in our room and he will come and get me if she does wake for a feed. I just hope the cat lets me sleep or she may just be thrown out of the window!

I don't know I need some advice but also need to rant. I really feel like the dummy needs to go, but I need to be in a better state mentally to take that on and also OH needs to be free to help with that. I am also thinking maybe we need to get her into her cot, but the dummy first! It also doesn't help that she does not nap at all, occasionally in her buggy, never in the sling, she's very alert and into everything, so as much as I love baby wearing it's more to occupy her than settle her.

Sorry I have gone on, but feel a litte stir crazy, if you have got this far, thankyou for reading, all tips welcome

That sounds really tough. I think trying to get her to nap regularly during the day is a good place to start, even if the naps are short. At 5 months old she should really only be awake for 2 hours at a time so if she's up all day she's probably really overtired and that's making the probem worse. Will she let you set her down once she's asleep? If not, maybe you could start by taking naps with her since you cosleep?

I will say that 5-6 months was a really difficult time for my LO's sleep, and I think that's the case for a lot of other babies too. A lot of things are going on developmentally and it can be really disruptive, especially for alert, clever babies like your girl.

 

[Boo44]

Totally this. I had to make myself stop obsessing about finding that exact perfect combo...

But then after we had two 5/6 hour stretches this weekend of course I was back to trying to replicate the exact conditions of those days...sigh.

Oh man, don't you hate that?! There have been multiple times where I've thought "OMG, she slept ____ hours after this person visited. How do I get them to visit every day?!" I think I'm going crazy

LOL.

Only today I was asking my nephew to push Jack around in his walker as last time he did that he slept late the next morning!!

 

[Noelle610]

Aggggh can I join this thread? I have 5 month old, her sleep at night was fine, well as I would expect with wakings for a feed so fine. I co sleep with here in her room while my OH sleeps in our room with the cat. But the last month has taken it's toll on me, today I was at breaking point to be honest, in tears and I really felt like a bad mum who to be honest when S cried I felt like I just don't care anymore. Obviously I do, but I am just so exhausted! I can't say what it is that S does as I'm so tired I have no idea, there is no pattern and it's totally random. It's not to do with feeding, wake ups for that are fine, it's restlessness, dummy problems, wake up to have a party for 2 hours interspersed with STTN, but I obviously don't myself as I'm too busy checking her breathing! I feel at the end of my tether and look like crap, and all the while OH looks as fresh as a daisy, growl growl! Not fair! Tonight he is going to sleep with her while I hopefully crash out in our room and he will come and get me if she does wake for a feed. I just hope the cat lets me sleep or she may just be thrown out of the window!

I don't know I need some advice but also need to rant. I really feel like the dummy needs to go, but I need to be in a better state mentally to take that on and also OH needs to be free to help with that. I am also thinking maybe we need to get her into her cot, but the dummy first! It also doesn't help that she does not nap at all, occasionally in her buggy, never in the sling, she's very alert and into everything, so as much as I love baby wearing it's more to occupy her than settle her.

Sorry I have gone on, but feel a litte stir crazy, if you have got this far, thankyou for reading, all tips welcome

You can vent here any time!

If the dummy is a problem I think you sould get rid of it.

5 months is a hard time for naps I think. How often do you put her down?

 

[charlie15]

Thank you Boo, taking naps with her is a great idea, I have tried it and sometimes it works other times she naps for 5-10 minutes then gets that second wind and I become her source of entertainment! I have had black out roller blinds fitted to help with the naps. This weekend we have OH's family coming to stay so when they have gone I will go to work on the naps. I think this is a tough time, she is developing so fast now it's scary so I'm sure that has something to do with this. I just feel that you reach a point of exhaustion that you function on such a basic level and I can't handle much more than that, maybe after a weekend with more sleep if we have some help will help me to take on more with regards to working on naps etc. maybe we'll do the naps before the dummy problem.

 

[bananaz]

LOL.

Only today I was asking my nephew to push Jack around in his walker as last time he did that he slept late the next morning!!

Yep, I would totally do that too.

 

[charlie15]

Aggggh can I join this thread? I have 5 month old, her sleep at night was fine, well as I would expect with wakings for a feed so fine. I co sleep with here in her room while my OH sleeps in our room with the cat. But the last month has taken it's toll on me, today I was at breaking point to be honest, in tears and I really felt like a bad mum who to be honest when S cried I felt like I just don't care anymore. Obviously I do, but I am just so exhausted! I can't say what it is that S does as I'm so tired I have no idea, there is no pattern and it's totally random. It's not to do with feeding, wake ups for that are fine, it's restlessness, dummy problems, wake up to have a party for 2 hours interspersed with STTN, but I obviously don't myself as I'm too busy checking her breathing! I feel at the end of my tether and look like crap, and all the while OH looks as fresh as a daisy, growl growl! Not fair! Tonight he is going to sleep with her while I hopefully crash out in our room and he will come and get me if she does wake for a feed. I just hope the cat lets me sleep or she may just be thrown out of the window!

I don't know I need some advice but also need to rant. I really feel like the dummy needs to go, but I need to be in a better state mentally to take that on and also OH needs to be free to help with that. I am also thinking maybe we need to get her into her cot, but the dummy first! It also doesn't help that she does not nap at all, occasionally in her buggy, never in the sling, she's very alert and into everything, so as much as I love baby wearing it's more to occupy her than settle her.

Sorry I have gone on, but feel a litte stir crazy, if you have got this far, thankyou for reading, all tips welcome

You can vent here any time!

If the dummy is a problem I think you sould get rid of it.

5 months is a hard time for naps I think. How often do you put her down?

Thank you, well I put her down at least 3 times a day, usually I do some activity with her in the morning, ideally she should have napped before then, have a feed and then we go out to say Gymboree, then a long walk where hopefully she will nap. It's hit and miss though, mostly miss tbh! Then another nap in the afternoon at home. That's the theory I don't think she's taken all of those since she was a newborn it's got worse though as she doesn't nap as well when out, yesterday I was out with her from 12 and she finally fell asleep at 3.30. I ended up putting her in the carrier for an hour as she was crying and just not sleeping at all! So she stopped crying and an hour later became restless so cue for me to put her in the buggy to sleep and off she went. That was her 1st nap since 10 am when she fell asleep on the boob at home for 15 minutes! I have a strict, effective bedtime routine which mostly works to get her to sleep every night at 7pm, the night time problems start from about 12-2am. I am now thinking I need to bring a more structured nap pattern too?? I think she may benefit from that.

As for the dummy, it's not doing it's job as she doesn't replace it herself so it's affecting her sleep as well. Oh babies and their sleep, it's so tough!

 

[Noelle610]

Aggggh can I join this thread? I have 5 month old, her sleep at night was fine, well as I would expect with wakings for a feed so fine. I co sleep with here in her room while my OH sleeps in our room with the cat. But the last month has taken it's toll on me, today I was at breaking point to be honest, in tears and I really felt like a bad mum who to be honest when S cried I felt like I just don't care anymore. Obviously I do, but I am just so exhausted! I can't say what it is that S does as I'm so tired I have no idea, there is no pattern and it's totally random. It's not to do with feeding, wake ups for that are fine, it's restlessness, dummy problems, wake up to have a party for 2 hours interspersed with STTN, but I obviously don't myself as I'm too busy checking her breathing! I feel at the end of my tether and look like crap, and all the while OH looks as fresh as a daisy, growl growl! Not fair! Tonight he is going to sleep with her while I hopefully crash out in our room and he will come and get me if she does wake for a feed. I just hope the cat lets me sleep or she may just be thrown out of the window!

I don't know I need some advice but also need to rant. I really feel like the dummy needs to go, but I need to be in a better state mentally to take that on and also OH needs to be free to help with that. I am also thinking maybe we need to get her into her cot, but the dummy first! It also doesn't help that she does not nap at all, occasionally in her buggy, never in the sling, she's very alert and into everything, so as much as I love baby wearing it's more to occupy her than settle her.

Sorry I have gone on, but feel a litte stir crazy, if you have got this far, thankyou for reading, all tips welcome

You can vent here any time!

If the dummy is a problem I think you sould get rid of it.

5 months is a hard time for naps I think. How often do you put her down?

Thank you, well I put her down at least 3 times a day, usually I do some activity with her in the morning, ideally she should have napped before then, have a feed and then we go out to say Gymboree, then a long walk where hopefully she will nap. It's hit and miss though, mostly miss tbh! Then another nap in the afternoon at home. That's the theory I don't think she's taken all of those since she was a newborn it's got worse though as she doesn't nap as well when out, yesterday I was out with her from 12 and she finally fell asleep at 3.30. I ended up putting her in the carrier for an hour as she was crying and just not sleeping at all! So she stopped crying and an hour later became restless so cue for me to put her in the buggy to sleep and off she went. That was her 1st nap since 10 am when she fell asleep on the boob at home for 15 minutes! I have a strict, effective bedtime routine which mostly works to get her to sleep every night at 7pm, the night time problems start from about 12-2am. I am now thinking I need to bring a more structured nap pattern too?? I think she may benefit from that.

As for the dummy, it's not doing it's job as she doesn't replace it herself so it's affecting her sleep as well. Oh babies and their sleep, it's so tough!

I agree with bananaz that I'd have her awake for no more than 2 hours at a time. I'd also put her in her cribs for naps with a dark room and loud white noise. Motion sleep becomes a bit lest restful at this and her lack of quality naps may be making her overtired. I've found a short naptime routine works well and gives LO an opportunity to wind down.

Night wakings after midnight are common because a baby's first stretch of sleep at this age is often their deepest. If you can get her on a good daytime schedule, I think it will help

 

[Shadowy Lady]

Noelle, I have a question for you. Are you still on sleep meds? I was barely on them for the past month (like I would take 1/2 Ativan every 4 days), but the recent bad nights messed me up so 4 nights ago I took a full pill....now for the past 3 nights I find myself waking up every 2-3 hours which has nothing to do with Sofia

I'm scared of taking more meds and getting addicted and never being able to get off them. My DH says 1/2 pill every other night for now should be ok until Sofia's back to sttn (which she's getting close to)...but I'm sooo scared yet I need the sleep. I had 5 hours of broken sleep last night and have been up since 3:30 am!