Rant - Feeling so hopeless about sleep!

[Shadowy Lady]

Noelle - great to hear that you are both doing well sleep wise.

Steph - awe I'm sorry to hear. Hope things are back up for you guys soon.

We discovered that Sofia has a cold on top of teething. Poor thing had a blocked nose that wax keeping her up all night. Gave her a steam bath last night, turned on the humidifier and her space heater and she slept from 8 pm to 2 am, then again till 5 am!!

She's looking better this morning. Hope all troubles go away for all of us soon.

 

[bananaz]

We discovered that Sofia has a cold on top of teething. Poor thing had a blocked nose that wax keeping her up all night. Gave her a steam bath last night, turned on the humidifier and her space heater and she slept from 8 pm to 2 am, then again till 5 am!!

She's looking better this morning. Hope all troubles go away for all of us soon.

That's awesome! I bet you felt like a new woman.

The night before last was very similar for Elsie. Down at 7:30, up at 2:30, then down again until 6. I was so happy! But it all fell apart again last night, and she woke every two hours all night until she decided to be up for the day at 5:30

As an experiment I tried bringing her into my bed at that point, and after about 30 minutes of nursing and back rubbing she fell asleep for another two hours! I'm not sure what to make of that, except that it confirmed my suspicion that she's not getting enough nighttime sleep and that she shouldn't be waking so early.

I have no idea what to do anymore. I give up. It's been over a month of this crazy unpredictable crap and I have tried all of my ideas and I seriously just give up.

 

[Noelle610]

Bananaz, I totally relate to be done with the unpredictability. It's so frustrating. I wish I could find a pattern in Charlotte's sleep. Like when she self-settles at bedtime, she sleeps well or when she eats more solids during the day she sleeps well. But there's no rhyme or reason to it. A lot of the books on getting baby to sleep through the night relate to feeding (Baby Whisperer, Babywise), but what if your baby isn't waking due to hunger?

Sometimes Charlie will wake briefly, fuss and put herself back to sleep. This would all be well and good, but it wakes me up! Weissbluth and Ferber would say she's waking between sleep cycles because she is overtired, but how is that possible when she is a pretty good napper? We're still in Texas and Charlotte had a 90 minute nap in the morning and a TWO AND A HALF HOUR nap in the afternoon, yet still woke about 4 times. I don't get it. How frustrating.

 

[bananaz]

Bananaz, I totally relate to be done with the unpredictability. It's so frustrating. I wish I could find a pattern in Charlotte's sleep. Like when she self-settles at bedtime, she sleeps well or when she eats more solids during the day she sleeps well. But there's no rhyme or reason to it. A lot of the books on getting baby to sleep through the night relate to feeding (Baby Whisperer, Babywise), but what if your baby isn't waking due to hunger?

Sometimes Charlie will wake briefly, fuss and put herself back to sleep. This would all be well and good, but it wakes me up! Weissbluth and Ferber would say she's waking between sleep cycles because she is overtired, but how is that possible when she is a pretty good napper? We're still in Texas and Charlotte had a 90 minute nap in the morning and a TWO AND A HALF HOUR nap in the afternoon, yet still woke about 4 times. I don't get it. How frustrating.

Yes, where is the freaking pattern?! Whenever she has a good night I spend ages poring over the details of the preceding day and try to reproduce those conditions exactly. Most of the time it doesn't work and the next night sucks anyway, but sometimes she'll continue to have good nights and I'll convince myself that I've found the miracle cure only to find out that it was all just a coincidence when she starts waking frequently again.

And I don't think hunger or being overtired are her issues either. I've made a point of feeding her really well during the day, both milk and solids, and she's consistently been taking three 1-1.5 hour long naps a day which is amazing for her.

The one thing I haven't tried is putting her down totally awake at night. I usually nurse until drowsy, set her in her crib and then she makes herself comfy and goes to sleep. I know she's capable of self-settling from awake but she usually puts up a fight and having peaceful, sleepy cuddle time is so much more pleasant for both of us.

 

[grumpymoo]

Thank you ladies. I feel so much better hearing your stories and knowing I am not alone.

My lo has nearly always woken every 2 hours to nurse. Recently it can be every hour! Sometimes my older lo gets me up too. I now lay in bed on a night getting stressed waiting for one of them to wake and not being able to sleep myself. Ridiculous!

I can't seem to break the nursing habit. its all he wants. I don't know. Sigh....

Anyway good luck tonight everyone

 

[Shadowy Lady]

Bananaz - thanks hun. Hope Elsie has a better night tonight. I'm so glad we have each other to talk to here.

Noelle - arghhh I totally know what you mean. Just when you think you made progress, things go backwards

Sofia had a decent night with two wakings at 12:30 am and 4:30 am (down at 8 pm). I however only slept one hour Saw the doctor today and got a prescription for sleep pills....i feel so tired today couldn't even drive there...had to cab

 

[Noelle610]

Grumpy, I know how it's easiest to take the path of least resistance!

Shadowy Lady, glad you got some help for the insomnia. We mamas have to take care of ourselves. Get some much-deserved rest tonight!

Charlotte is napping horribly today. She did 90 minutes this morning, but just 30 minutes for her noon and 3pm naps. Ugh. Here's hoping tonight isn't a nightmare. I am so obsessive about her napping well that it's probably unhealthy. On the bright side, DH and his family played with her after our Thanksgiving dinner and I had a lovely one hour nap myself!

 

[lysh]

Everything is still back and forth with sleep here too....we have a great night and then crappy ones. She is unpredictable.....Bananaz- I did the same thing, one morning at 5 I took my LO to the couch and nursed her. We both fell asleep for 2 more hours.

ugh

 

[katrinalorien]

Yeah - I really don't want to keep co-sleeping. But its the only way I can assure myself some sleep... so I keep doing it. I don't understand the strange schedules either. I can't figure out what is different from a good night from a bad night. Sometimes the best nights are when she totally crashes and does a 5 hour stretch. But I really don't want to do that to her, she really is completely crashing at that point (when she's been up for like 4 hours or so...)

 

[MiniKiwi]

Just venting

Mia just set a new record for the shortest nap ever - 8 minutes. These naps are making me so insane. My whole life is trying to make her nap. I find myself bouncing when she's not in my arms

 

[Shadowy Lady]

I had a night off so I took a Melatonin and went to bed in a separate room in the basement and my DH took charge with bottles of ebm. I did sleep from 9 pm to 2 am, but was up after that :/ no idea why!!! I didn't even hear the baby, I just could not sleep. So finally it was day time and I came back upstairs totally drained.

I'm starting to think I have a serious problem...or I'll die from sleep deprivation or something Not sure what else to try to get some sleep...being obsessed with sleep now and my bed scares me...

 

[lysh]

Sleep continues to be unpredictable on our end. Last night was one of the better nights...she slept from 6:40-11:40! That is the first 5 hour stretch she has ever done. Then she had a 3 hour stretch. After that it went downhill, but that was not too bad!

Our bedtime keeps getting earlier though. Tonight we had to put her down at 6- she had her last nap at around 2:30 (only slept for 20 minutes) and would not go back down. Obviously she was so tired that we just had to put her down. Now it is 30 minutes later and she is fighting sleep. ugh

I start work this Tuesday- should be fun.

 

[Noelle610]

I had a night off so I took a Melatonin and went to bed in a separate room in the basement and my DH took charge with bottles of ebm. I did sleep from 9 pm to 2 am, but was up after that :/ no idea why!!! I didn't even hear the baby, I just could not sleep. So finally it was day time and I came back upstairs totally drained.

I'm starting to think I have a serious problem...or I'll die from sleep deprivation or something Not sure what else to try to get some sleep...being obsessed with sleep now and my bed scares me...

Melatonin helps me fall asleep at the beginning of the night, but it doesn't help me return to sleep after I wake. I totally sympathize! Do you think you're suffering from some postpartum anxiety? That can make sleep difficult. I too get really worried about not being able to sleep. I feel like it can't be healthy to sleep so little!

 

[Noelle610]

Sleep continues to be unpredictable on our end. Last night was one of the better nights...she slept from 6:40-11:40! That is the first 5 hour stretch she has ever done. Then she had a 3 hour stretch. After that it went downhill, but that was not too bad!

Our bedtime keeps getting earlier though. Tonight we had to put her down at 6- she had her last nap at around 2:30 (only slept for 20 minutes) and would not go back down. Obviously she was so tired that we just had to put her down. Now it is 30 minutes later and she is fighting sleep. ugh

I start work this Tuesday- should be fun.

Wow, a 5 hour stretch! That's wonderful.

I think it's natural for bedtime to get earlier... My LO has been going to bed at 6pm recently because it's also hard to get her to take that third nap.

 

[Noelle610]

So our trip went okay. Naps were very tough to come by. Although my father in law watched LO one day and of course she slept for 2.5 hours! She loves him. Not sure how he did it.

Sleep was up and down. Charlotte probably woke an average of 3 times per night, which I don't think is terrible considering she was in a strange place. I did a lot of feeding and soothing to sleep, so I imagine we'll have a bit of a backslide now that we are home.

I just feel like I need to do something different, but I don't know what! I feel like I continue doing the same thing and expecting different results and it's not going to happen. She's not magically going to STTN. I suspect trying to space feedings is the answer, but I'm concerned about messing with something that works.

 

[polaris]

So our trip went okay. Naps were very tough to come by. Although my father in law watched LO one day and of course she slept for 2.5 hours! She loves him. Not sure how he did it.

Sleep was up and down. Charlotte probably woke an average of 3 times per night, which I don't think is terrible considering she was in a strange place. I did a lot of feeding and soothing to sleep, so I imagine we'll have a bit of a backslide now that we are home.

I just feel like I need to do something different, but I don't know what! I feel like I continue doing the same thing and expecting different results and it's not going to happen. She's not magically going to STTN. I suspect trying to space feedings is the answer, but I'm concerned about messing with something that works.

Hi Noelle, just to say that even if you don't do anything she will eventually magically sleep through the night. It just might take a bit longer. My son started sleeping through at nine and a half months, just as I had been starting to wonder whether I should do something about his night feeds and try to encourage him to sleep through. I think as long as your LO can self-settle, they will eventually grow out of needing milk at night and they will sleep through in the end.

 

[Shadowy Lady]

I had a night off so I took a Melatonin and went to bed in a separate room in the basement and my DH took charge with bottles of ebm. I did sleep from 9 pm to 2 am, but was up after that :/ no idea why!!! I didn't even hear the baby, I just could not sleep. So finally it was day time and I came back upstairs totally drained.

I'm starting to think I have a serious problem...or I'll die from sleep deprivation or something Not sure what else to try to get some sleep...being obsessed with sleep now and my bed scares me...

Melatonin helps me fall asleep at the beginning of the night, but it doesn't help me return to sleep after I wake. I totally sympathize! Do you think you're suffering from some postpartum anxiety? That can make sleep difficult. I too get really worried about not being able to sleep. I feel like it can't be healthy to sleep so little!

I was suffering from anxiety earlier on but not now which is why I wonder how I cannot sleep My doctor said my condition is more hormonal. I did finally sleep last night though as my DH took charge for one more night. I went downstairs at 8:30 pm (sofia was asleep by 8). I ended up sleeping from 9 pm to 6:30 am. I did wake up maybe 4 times briefly but each time i went right down to sleep hope this trend can continue.

My DH said sofia again had two night wakings: one at 2:00 am and one at 5:30 am. Again she barely ate at 2:00 but she did at 5:30 am. Why is she waking up if she doesn't wanna eat? How do I eliminate her 2 am call? She used to not wake up till 4:30 before but the teething and the cold messed with her night routine....is there a way to get her to not wake up if she's not hungry anyway?

 

[bananaz]

So our trip went okay. Naps were very tough to come by. Although my father in law watched LO one day and of course she slept for 2.5 hours! She loves him. Not sure how he did it.

Sleep was up and down. Charlotte probably woke an average of 3 times per night, which I don't think is terrible considering she was in a strange place. I did a lot of feeding and soothing to sleep, so I imagine we'll have a bit of a backslide now that we are home.

I just feel like I need to do something different, but I don't know what! I feel like I continue doing the same thing and expecting different results and it's not going to happen. She's not magically going to STTN. I suspect trying to space feedings is the answer, but I'm concerned about messing with something that works.

How often is she eating now? I've had a lot of people recommend spacing feedings to me, and when I've managed to do it with my LO (which isn't always easy) it does seem to encourage her to eat more. I don't know that it actually helps with sleep though.

Also, are you giving Charlotte solids on a regular basis? It seems like half the people I talk to say that solids "made" their babies STTN and the other half say it made them wake more But if you're trying to up her daytime calorie intake that could help?

 

[bananaz]

I was suffering from anxiety earlier on but not now which is why I wonder how I cannot sleep My doctor said my condition is more hormonal. I did finally sleep last night though as my DH took charge for one more night. I went downstairs at 8:30 pm (sofia was asleep by 8). I ended up sleeping from 9 pm to 6:30 am. I did wake up maybe 4 times briefly but each time i went right down to sleep hope this trend can continue.

My DH said sofia again had two night wakings: one at 2:00 am and one at 5:30 am. Again she barely ate at 2:00 but she did at 5:30 am. Why is she waking up if she doesn't wanna eat? How do I eliminate her 2 am call? She used to not wake up till 4:30 before but the teething and the cold messed with her night routine....is there a way to get her to not wake up if she's not hungry anyway?

Can you resettle her at 2am without feeding her? Ideally you'd do it without picking her up too but if that's not possible, maybe start with rocking and then gradually reduce the amount of time you're holding her? Or you could try PU/PD or shush-pat or something similar? That way she would learn that she can go back to sleep without eating and with only minimal intervention on your part, and then hopefully the 2am waking would go away on its own. But to be fair I don't know if I should be offering advice on eliminating night wakings because I can't do it with my own LO to save my life!

 

[Shadowy Lady]

I was suffering from anxiety earlier on but not now which is why I wonder how I cannot sleep My doctor said my condition is more hormonal. I did finally sleep last night though as my DH took charge for one more night. I went downstairs at 8:30 pm (sofia was asleep by 8). I ended up sleeping from 9 pm to 6:30 am. I did wake up maybe 4 times briefly but each time i went right down to sleep hope this trend can continue.

My DH said sofia again had two night wakings: one at 2:00 am and one at 5:30 am. Again she barely ate at 2:00 but she did at 5:30 am. Why is she waking up if she doesn't wanna eat? How do I eliminate her 2 am call? She used to not wake up till 4:30 before but the teething and the cold messed with her night routine....is there a way to get her to not wake up if she's not hungry anyway?

Can you resettle her at 2am without feeding her? Ideally you'd do it without picking her up too but if that's not possible, maybe start with rocking and then gradually reduce the amount of time you're holding her? Or you could try PU/PD or shush-pat or something similar? That way she would learn that she can go back to sleep without eating and with only minimal intervention on your part, and then hopefully the 2am waking would go away on its own. But to be fair I don't know if I should be offering advice on eliminating night wakings because I can't do it with my own LO to save my life!

thanks hunnie I will try PU/PD tonight and see. I think she's just waking up outta habit which would be nice to break now. I'm trying to deal with my own insomnia too so her eliminating that random wakeup call would help