Rant - Feeling so hopeless about sleep!

[Aimee4311]

Josalyn normally gets 3 hours +/- of nap time per day and normally sleeps 11-12 hours at night (that includes the short wake ups to nurse). I don't know the recommendations, this is just how her naps/sleep has worked themselves out! I always just let her sleep and enjoy any free time I get!

 

[stephie_corin]

Thanks Aimee I was worried the longer naps caused his horrible sleep last night but I also suspect it's just teething... Or wind (we had some err .... strange rumblings last night!). I think Josalyn is spot on with her sleep, clever girl!! X

 

[gaiagirl]

I think his naps seem great! I wouldn't mess with them

We had a super restless night, waking every 1-2 hours and flailing about. He started grinding his top and bottom teeth together this morning, which frankly was an annoying sound to wake up to. Lol.

A bit more movement on the top teeth though so hopefully we are close! Good grief he is the worlds slowest teether.

 

[Noelle610]

A bit more movement on the top teeth though so hopefully we are close! Good grief he is the worlds slowest teether.

My DD was/is like this too. They take forever

 

[anti]

I've been MIA for ages now! We were finally getting somewhere with night times then she got tonsillitis and that messed everything up, then some more teeth, then a holiday to South Africa and then gastro enteritis so everything has been mayhem for us for a few weeks now. Think we are starting to settle back into things at home now. She's still waking at night and taking a bottle. Gonna wait another week before tackling that I think.

 

[NotNic]

Gaia he's ahead of my Finlay. Number 7 has just come through but he was past the 7mth point before any arrive. I hear its a sign of strong gums. x

 

[seaweed eater]

Stephie, personally I would wake if he'd slept for over 2 hours or was still asleep too close to bedtime, but it doesn't sound like either of those were the case.

You have a fair point regarding object permanence. My understanding is the same as Gaia's. That it's not just that they go "Huh?!" but also, "Hey, where's that nipple that was in my mouth that helped me go to sleep before? I want that back!" whereas a baby without object permanence would just go, hmm, whatever, and try to sleep.

I have my own question about object permanence. I've never understood why people say you shouldn't sleep train until 6 months because that's when they learn that you can come back for them, or something like that. Surely what they actually learn at that age is that you could leave them and NOT come back? Isn't that why object permanence is related to separation anxiety? I mean I can think of other reasons not to sleep train until 6 months, but that one has never made sense to me.

Are there fast teethers?! People keep telling me they can see Munchkin's second tooth. I'm not getting excited about it until it's through. 19 days now since the first one!

 

[gaiagirl]

Yes, SE I have heard of these elusive babies for whom the pair just pop through overnight...not for us!

 

[Aimee4311]

Josalyn was a fast teether! One day one was just there and I could see the second which came through two days later. But, it's taken forever for them to get all the way up...going on two months now and I still don't think they're all the way out!

 

[stephie_corin]

Teething = worst thing ever...!!! C didn't sleep more than half an hour last night before moaning and crying. I gave him paracetamol and it did squat so I'm going to try iboprufen tonight. Another slow tether here, only 1 tooth but the second is visible. No wonder his naps have been long these last two days, poor baby is exhausted.

SE, I always assumed no sleep training before 6 months had to do with the belief that after 6 months they no longer need night feeds? (Not saying I agree with that but I've heard lots of people say it).

 

[gaiagirl]

Stephie I think that is one of the other reasons for the recommendation.

Soooooo crazy tonight. He was nuts, clearly in pain and getting overtired but couldnt nurse without biting to calm down. Finally the baby advil kicked in and got him to settle but wow...could be a rough night.

Question I am hoping someone here might be able to answer (Noelle?):
When do babies sleep cycles lengthen and is it sudden or gradual. Lately we have had several 1 hour naps, whereas its always been either 40, 80, 120 min...he still has the 40 min ones too but quite a few 60min lately?! He doesn't wake up upset as he usually would if he was woken by a noise or something...interesting!

 

[stephie_corin]

Gaia sounds like our boys are going through the same thing! I don't know the answer to your question but we are suddenly getting hour long naps too... ?

Good luck for tonight! X

 

[VikkiD]

Made the mistake of listening to hubby and putting lo to bed later at 7:30 thinking might stop the 5am wake up Sunday morning 4:50 managed to get him back down after a feed till 6.30. Last night he woke every couple of hours I eventually fed him at 5 an just woke him at 7 so tonight I think we will be going back to a earlier bedtime I might even try get him in bed for 6:30

 

[Noelle610]

Question I am hoping someone here might be able to answer (Noelle?):
When do babies sleep cycles lengthen and is it sudden or gradual. Lately we have had several 1 hour naps, whereas its always been either 40, 80, 120 min...he still has the 40 min ones too but quite a few 60min lately?! He doesn't wake up upset as he usually would if he was woken by a noise or something...interesting!

It takes awhile - years - for their sleep cycles to lengthen. If naps are getting longer, it's more likely that he's transitioning/self-soothing better during the day. The longer sleep is likely yielding more quality rest, hence the happy wakings.

This is an article I've come across a few times on the way babies sleep and it's very interesting!

https://www.parentingscience.com/baby-sleep-patterns.html

(Caveat - I like it for the science and anthropological perspectives, but obviously I don't agree with some of the sleep training stuff)

 

[gaiagirl]

I've read that a few times, lol. Love how evidence based it is, I also love reading about sleep across different cultures.

I'm thinking maybe the extra 20 min is because of the soother possibly...stretching out wakeup a little. He's always been a happy waker, unless he's woken prematurely by noise or something. But maybe he's quiet a bit longer with the soother in! Lol

 

[stephie_corin]

I'm just feeling so lost at the moment. I really hope this is teething... it's like I can't make his routine work. This last three days he has taken longer naps and then has been fighting bedtime for over an hour. I'm sure it's me holding him that is lengthening his naps and if I put him straight down he would go back to 30-45 minute naps. Maybe that is his natural napping pattern and I should just respect it?

Once I finally got him to sleep, he was up again and took ages to settle. I gave him iboprufen and I'm just praying it has some effect. If it doesn't, it means he really has become the worlds worst sleeper! Last night he was up at least twice an hour and would only go back to sleep if I rocked him.

Todays naps were just over one hour each. It doesn't sound like too much but maybe it is.

I'm so tired and feeling sick and I just wish he would sleep!

I'm just ranting - no response needed. I would scream out loud to get it out but then I'd wake him up... Ha!

Have a great night everyone!xxx

 

[NotNic]

Stephie he's transitioning to longer naps and it does take a while for them to get through the transition. Longer naps are a good thing! And if he's teething too then its no wonder you're a bit unsettled. What time is morning wake up and bedtime now? Xx

 

[seaweed eater]

Sorry you are struggling at bedtime, Stephie. I agree with NN, I think your naps sound good. C's bedtime is pretty early IIRC? I hope the ibuprofen helped - did things get better? Think whatever else is going on you can be pretty sure his mouth is bothering him, so don't be too hard on yourself.

 

[gaiagirl]

Stephie the teeth wreak HAVOC, seriously. This is not permanent, it will pass I promise

F now has four openings up top, so at least we are making progress. Poor baby.

 

[stephie_corin]

Thanks everyone. It is teething I'm sure, he slept three hours straight after the ibuprofen.

He's up at 5.30-6 and naps at 845/9 and 12.45/1 for an hour each (we had a few freakishly long 1.45 naps but I think they are the exception). I aim for bedtime at 6. I think he is ready for a 7 pm bedtime but if I do that, it means 6 hours between breastfeeds before bed! He's still not taking many solids but I offer on each wakeup. For the last week he has fallen asleep at 6 while nursing then woken up for an hour after.

Gaia, four teeth openings?? Wow, poor F must be so sore. I hope they pop down soon.

Sorry for the meltdown last night! And thanks so much for all of the support. You girls are all wonderful xxx