Rant - Feeling so hopeless about sleep!

[polaris]

Amy - yay for the tooth! That is really exciting - at last!!

Seaweed, sorry to hear that things are a bit bumpy at the moment. I think you are right to step back from sleep training for the moment and just do what feels right. At least Munchkin is able to self-settle now and hopefully he should go back to sleeping well once he is feeling a bit more settled.

Stephie - for sure babbling counts as a milestone! It is such a huge thing for them starting to imitate sounds and properly babble. Clara does the exact same thing with pulling my hair at night-time and then when I stop her from doing that she pulls her own hair. It definitely must be a soothing thing. I have got quite irritated with Clara about the hair-pulling so you have my sympathies. That's amazing that Cully can drink through a straw - Thomas totally couldn't do that until he was maybe 18 months so I haven't thought to try with Clara. Must give it a go!!

Rachel - I am the same, I am fully cosleeping now and have given up totally on cutting back on night feeds and am just feeding her whenever she wakes, so much quicker and easier and on a good night (no teething pain/extended wakings) it almost feels like a proper night's sleep. I have decided that I am not going to do anything about night feeds until she is a year old so I will reassess in a couple of months!

Noelle - that's so interesting that she's happily taking two naps while at home with you. Do you think daycare are trying to push the transition a bit?

Ich - the others have already given you good advice. I think your LO's age is such a tough time for sleep. Hang on in there, it does get easier.

 

[lch28]

You could do that! Swaddle first, bouncer second. Personally, I'm a fan of cold turkey though A few tough days/nights, but you get it all out of the way - like ripping off the band-aid. This is the age when they want to self-soothe, but don't quite know how to yet. Allowing your LO some space and the freedom to move about will help him learn. It may be difficult at first since he's not used to it, but he will get there. Many babies sleep best when they figure out how to roll onto their tummies.

It looks like you're doing 4 naps still. I'd try to push his awake time and aim for 3 good naps (by which I mean 45 minutes or more). Something like this:

7am wake
8:45am-9:45am nap 1
11:45am-1pm nap 2
3pm-4pm nap 3
6:30pm bedtime

You may end up with an earliesh bedtime, but that's okay - most babies, biologically speaking, do best with a bedtime between 6pm and 8pm.

At night, where is he sleeping? How do you respond to the night wakings?

So If i extend his wake time/drop a nap will he lengthen them on his own? He sleeps between 30-45 minutes lately. I'm just worried of him getting even more tired At night he starts out in his crib. Usually he ends up in the bouncy. Last night went pretty well, he stayed in the crib till five am.. (woke up for a bottle twice but went right back down in the crib)

When he wakes up I try to soothe him in other ways, I only feed him if he seems genuinely hungry. Sometimes I can put my hand on his tummy and hell fall back asleep, I rub in between his eyes, pat, etc.. I also wait 5 mins after he wakes to see if hell fall back asleep or if hes really awake.

He sleeps in a woombie. Ive seen him roll in it and he can still move his hands up and lift up his head all the way. The thing is, he doesn't roll over in his sleep when hes in the woombie. But when hes in his sleep sack, he always rolls over and starts to scream because I think it scares him. I guess having his arms free makes him roll over..

for example.. tonight Jonathan had a bath at 6:30pm, a bottle and fell asleep around 7:15. He was in his sleep sack. I laid him in his crib and went to eat dinner. 5 minutes later he screamed on the monitor and I went in and he was on his belly. I put him on his back and tried to settle him, for nearly 1.5 hours. He just kept falling asleep and then rolling over and screaming. It was awful and I was in tears =[ Its 9:10 and he just fell asleep.. because I gave up After trying to get him to sleep for so long I could just see he was exhausted and I put him in his woombie and his eyes glazed over and he fell asleep right then. Hes sound asleep in his crib

I feel like an awful mommy. Ive created such a bad habit.. and I have no idea how to help him sleep now. Hes growing out of his woombie, hes much too big in my opinion to be so restricted and I am not buying another one!

I feel bad for letting him get so upset tonight. I just dunno what to do I'm worried about him rolling, thank god for my snuza monitor.. =\

 

[kettle28]

Hello! Haven't checked in on your thread for ages hope you're all doing well x

Lo is 6months next week and just getting over a little cold, teething cheeks but no teeth anywhere near yet!

Anyhoo, his sleep!

If I put him down at 50-60m since wake up he plays for 5m, starts to quiet then within 10m falls asleep with minimum fuss. He then does his usual 40-60m sleep.

If I leave him past the hour then he gets overtired real quick and it's a one hour nightmare to get him down and then for 30/40mins!

Bedtime is non existent, he's so overtired by this point that its been a car or pram ride to get him started - every night

So, what I'm asking is: although his wake time should be 1.45-2.30 (or something like it!) e goes off to sleep with little or no fuss and does a good 40-60m each time if we do 1-1hr 10wake time.

I should stick with the hour? Until he naps longer or bedtime improves, or he catches up on his sleep!

 

[lch28]

Hi hun, id assume hes a bit overtired possibly.. could you gradually increase his wake time, by maybe 5 minutes a day or something?

 

[Noelle610]

You could do that! Swaddle first, bouncer second. Personally, I'm a fan of cold turkey though A few tough days/nights, but you get it all out of the way - like ripping off the band-aid. This is the age when they want to self-soothe, but don't quite know how to yet. Allowing your LO some space and the freedom to move about will help him learn. It may be difficult at first since he's not used to it, but he will get there. Many babies sleep best when they figure out how to roll onto their tummies.

It looks like you're doing 4 naps still. I'd try to push his awake time and aim for 3 good naps (by which I mean 45 minutes or more). Something like this:

7am wake
8:45am-9:45am nap 1
11:45am-1pm nap 2
3pm-4pm nap 3
6:30pm bedtime

You may end up with an earliesh bedtime, but that's okay - most babies, biologically speaking, do best with a bedtime between 6pm and 8pm.

At night, where is he sleeping? How do you respond to the night wakings?

So If i extend his wake time/drop a nap will he lengthen them on his own? He sleeps between 30-45 minutes lately. I'm just worried of him getting even more tired At night he starts out in his crib. Usually he ends up in the bouncy. Last night went pretty well, he stayed in the crib till five am.. (woke up for a bottle twice but went right back down in the crib)

When he wakes up I try to soothe him in other ways, I only feed him if he seems genuinely hungry. Sometimes I can put my hand on his tummy and hell fall back asleep, I rub in between his eyes, pat, etc.. I also wait 5 mins after he wakes to see if hell fall back asleep or if hes really awake.

He sleeps in a woombie. Ive seen him roll in it and he can still move his hands up and lift up his head all the way. The thing is, he doesn't roll over in his sleep when hes in the woombie. But when hes in his sleep sack, he always rolls over and starts to scream because I think it scares him. I guess having his arms free makes him roll over..

for example.. tonight Jonathan had a bath at 6:30pm, a bottle and fell asleep around 7:15. He was in his sleep sack. I laid him in his crib and went to eat dinner. 5 minutes later he screamed on the monitor and I went in and he was on his belly. I put him on his back and tried to settle him, for nearly 1.5 hours. He just kept falling asleep and then rolling over and screaming. It was awful and I was in tears =[ Its 9:10 and he just fell asleep.. because I gave up After trying to get him to sleep for so long I could just see he was exhausted and I put him in his woombie and his eyes glazed over and he fell asleep right then. Hes sound asleep in his crib

I feel like an awful mommy. Ive created such a bad habit.. and I have no idea how to help him sleep now. Hes growing out of his woombie, hes much too big in my opinion to be so restricted and I am not buying another one!

I feel bad for letting him get so upset tonight. I just dunno what to do I'm worried about him rolling, thank god for my snuza monitor.. =\

Yes, naps should lengthen. It will take some time though, usually a week so you have to stick with it. It's hard to distract a grumpy baby, but going outside works very well. Sunlight supresses the bodies natural production of melatonin, which makes us sleepy. There are two schools of thought, one would say tweak all naps and night time and the other would say get your nights in order first and then work on the daytime. You can really choose either option, as long as you are consistent.

I'd get rid of the wombie. Yes, he's going to be upset on his tummy until he gets used to moving around. We went through that too and it sucks, but it does pass. How close to 6 months is your LO? Quite honestly, it might be best to remove all crutches - wombie, bouncy, whatever - and sleep train if he's the approrpiate age. Like I said before, rip off the band aid!

You are NOT a bad mom. Seriously. The things that soothe our babies as infants - swaddling, rocking, feeding, etc. just start not to work as well at some point. It's natural; it's one of the first ways babies assert their independence. It's hard because it's uncomfortable for them as well; they don't totally know how to fall asleep on their own and need it can be frustrating. I was in the same boat that you were. There's no right answer; you can sleep train or wait it out. Just depends on what works best for you!

 

[lch28]

He will be 6 months old on July 21 (unless I am supposed to go by weeks, he'll be 24 weeks old next Monday..

I guess I'll have to look into sleep training. I don't know much about it and I'm afraid I won't be very good at that. I think he'll get himself into such a state.. He really doesn't do well left on his own. Like the car seat, my god. He absolutely hates it. Doesn't sleep and literally screams bloody murder the minute I close the door and get in the car. Has been like that since he was about 3 months old.. I can really only go somewhere if its no more then 10 minutes away. The other day there was an accident on the way to the grocery store which is 3 mins away and we were stuck in the car for 35 minutes. He cried so hard the whole time

I think he needs a smoother transition, I just can't figure out how to do it. I thought I was doing really well and now I just feel like I am totally lost!

Someone suggested a zipadeezip to me.. but just not sure. I don't have the funds really and it'll take 2 weeks to get here and who knows if it'll make a difference.. Anyone ever used one? I don't want to create a whole new habit also!

 

[AmyS]

Noelle - Do you think she's ready for 1 nap? I know you said before that your daycare provider wants them all on the same schedule, but if she does better on 2, then I'd tell her not to rush it. I guess it's probably not easy for daycare to put her down though with all of the stimulation from the other kids though....such a dilemma! Oh, I see Polaris says the same above.

kettle - I do not know much at all! But, if he's going to be 6 months soon, I'd probably try to increase his wake times to the recommended 2-2.5 hours. It might help lengthen his naps and get you on a better schedule. How much wake time does he have in a day? Could he possible be undertired? When I was stretching out my daughter's wake times, I did it slowly, and tried for an extra 15-30 minutes every day. It does work! He might get crabby at 40-60 min, but that's probably because he's used to sleeping at those times, not because he really needs to. But, as I said, the others know way more than I do!

Ich28 - I know what you mean about creating another sleep association to break if you try to transition slowly. I have no experience with the zipadeezip, but you'd probably end up with less overall stress if you just went cold turkey. I did google "transitioning out of woombie" and read that one person slowly unzipped it a little at a time so that baby had more arm movement, and then they transitioned baby into a sleep sack.

Stephie - Hope you are having a better night!
___________________

Last night was ok - we started in the RNP again, because I needed to cut her nails, and hubby was working late again. At midnight, she woke for a bottle, so I fed her but she didn't fall asleep. She was moving all over on me trying to get comfortable, so I gave her a kiss and put her in the crib with her lovey. And....drumroll, please...she actually fell asleep. It took awhile, and she fussed a few times for a few seconds, but she rolled all over that crib, dozed off, then woke up and rolled around some more, dozed off again, etc. Finally, she fell asleep soundly for a few hours. After her 4am early morning wakeup, I put her back in the RNP awake, and she put herself back to sleep in that too. So she really can't deny that she knows how to self soothe!

 

[Noelle610]

Noelle - Do you think she's ready for 1 nap? I know you said before that your daycare provider wants them all on the same schedule, but if she does better on 2, then I'd tell her not to rush it. I guess it's probably not easy for daycare to put her down though with all of the stimulation from the other kids though....such a dilemma! Oh, I see Polaris says the same above.

Ugh she might not be.... I just can't figure it out. I feel like she'd happily take 2 until she's a teenager.

 

[AmyS]

Noelle - Do you think she's ready for 1 nap? I know you said before that your daycare provider wants them all on the same schedule, but if she does better on 2, then I'd tell her not to rush it. I guess it's probably not easy for daycare to put her down though with all of the stimulation from the other kids though....such a dilemma! Oh, I see Polaris says the same above.

Ugh she might not be.... I just can't figure it out. I feel like she'd happily take 2 until she's a teenager.

She sounds like me! In fact, 2 naps a day sounds nice at this age too!

I hope you get it figured out soon!

 

[stephie_corin]

Amy! Congrats to you and Chloe on the tooth! Don't forget to write it in your baby book!

Polaris, I am so glad to hear you say that Clara does the hair thing too!! I thought my baby was a bit strange, but it turns out he's not so strange... Unless he and Clara are both a bit eccentric

Ich, our babies are so similar. Cully hates the car seat too. I found even very gentle sleep training wasn't a good fit for us personally (I hate hearing him cry) so we are waiting things out.

SE, Gaia - how are things?

Kettle, to be honest I suspect your LO is getting too much sleep in the day with naps every hour. Sleep can be habit forming and I really would work on extending his awake times. 1 hour seems very very short for his age. He may take short naps but three short naps and better night sleep is a good trade off, right? Good luck!

We had an ok night. Something is definitely going on in that little head of his. He's been such a daredevil ... He split his lip open today after slipping over, climbed stairs for the first time, is holding on to things standing up and letting go for a few seconds. I feel like he is testing all kinds of physical boundaries at the moment.

OMG... Mouth injuries bleed so much. My hands were shaking after I finished soothing him and cleaning him up.

I hope everyone has a good night. Happy 4th of July to our American friends xxx

 

[stephie_corin]

Amy, we cross posted - that is amazing!!! Go Chloe! You must be so proud of her!!

Noelle, is there any reason developmentally why they should move to one nap? Good luck!!! By the way, is she doing two long naps or is the morning one just a catnap?

 

[AmyS]

Stephie - How amazing that he is doing so much!! No wonder he's not sleeping well, he is really going at it! Might as well do it all at once, right? Glad your night was ok and not terrible. "Ok" is doable for the time being.

Mouth injuries do bleed a lot, but thankfully, they also heal pretty fast! I hope he's not too sore from it today!

I did write that in her baby book! As well as her first haircut! I had to trim the 5 pieces of hair that was hanging between her eyes.

 

[seaweed eater]

We have a tooth here too!!!!! It's the bottom one. I could have sworn the top one would be in first.

I'm sorry to have fallen behind. I promise I'll catch up soon. Just feeling sad about daycare still.

 

[gaiagirl]

Stephie! A split lip is so scary! They bounce back so fast but hugs xxxx that sounds intense. He is all over the place hey!? Maybe it'll tire him out more

AFM - actually we have had two successful evenings with him in his room. He has slept about 7ish-7ish (with 3/4 wakeups) coming to bed whenever I go. It's been pretty smooth for a couple days so can't complain! But I'm sure it'll change again in a few days, lol.

The good thing is I can stop worrying about holding him creating a habit since I was holding him like a week straight and he is fine to be in his room, so yay!

 

[Noelle610]

You know, I have no idea Stephie! I just keep reading that they should transition between 15-18 months and I guess I'm just kind of freaking out that we're not there yet since she was an early 3-2 transitioner. She's still doing 2 long naps! This morning it was 90 minutes and 105 minutes in the afternoon.

 

[Aimee4311]

Hey y'all! Just wanted to give an update on us! I've decided Josalyn's sleep isn't bad at all. 2 nights ago she woke up about 3-4 times crying, but was easy to soothe so I thought nothing of it. The next day, she had cut her 3rd tooth! The badish sleep was the only sign she gave, so I feel very lucky to have such a relaxed teether!

We're back to feeding to sleep. It's so quick and easy to get her down now that we're on 2 naps a day, I'm just going to wait on cutting out nursing to sleep. She's been giving me several longish stretches at night without needing to nurse, so she's spacing that out on her own, which is great! I feel rested when I wake up!

Developmentally she's got a lot going on! In the past month she's learned to crawl, learned to make sounds using her mouth + her hand-like wa wa wa wa (idk I that makes sense...). She's learning to wave at people and has started putting her hands together like she wants to clap. Also, yesterday she pulled herself up using the couch!

Thankfully it's not affecting her sleep! I'm still silently stalking this thread because I know babies like to keep changing things up just when you get comfortable! I'm cheering you all on!

 

[stephie_corin]

Amy, first haircut!!! awww! our babies are growing up so fast!

SE sending you huge, big virtual hugs!! I'm so sorry you are feeling sad about daycare. Munchkin will get there - babies are so adaptable and change is an inevitable part of life; it can be daunting but change leads to new and wonderful things. Thinking of you and Munchkin. And congratulations on tooth 2! Cully and Munchkin are neck and neck in the tooth race - I wonder who will get their front teeth first?

Gaia, I'm hoping he will tire out! It's not happening yet but fingers crossed! I'm so happy you're having such good nights! It's astounding how quickly these babies change!! Three cheers for F

Noelle, keep us posted on her progress! I think if she is happy and sleeping well at night it's no problem. I'm sure you've read one of the signs of being ready for one nap is they start fighting one of their other naps: it stands to reason that if she's happily taking both maybe she's not ready?

Aimee, so lovely to read your update!

 

[gaiagirl]

Curse struck, battled bedtime again last night. Tooth 8 poking through a little now though...

The saga continues.

 

[rmsh1]

I thought I should pop in here and report on Emma's STTN progress. We had been patting/shhhing her at the times she woke and did not need a feed, and it was going OK. I had gotten her down to just two feeds a night, and we settled her by just patting and shhing her the other times she woke. Sometimes it would require several patting and shhing sessions.

The last three nights Emma has technically STTN. The first night was for 5 hours, then 7 hours and last night 8 BUT all three nights, she has gotten her mitt off one hand and sucked her thumb It seems the thumb sucking is settling her. We do not want to encourage thumb sucking, and she wont take a pacifier. I am enjoying the extra sleep, but want to nip the thumb sucking in the butt. I can't win can I?

 

[Noelle610]

8 gaia?! That's a lot for that age! Poor bub.