Recurrent Miscarriage Thread

[dan-o]

Hi madtowngirl that's very sad news I'm so sorry for your loss. Xxx

Dairy, my pregnancies are thin on the ground this time too. Just one in 18m (mc @ 8w)
..unlike my previous run of 5 almost back to back! (Last of which was my #3 rainbow!)
I seem to remember you were hyper fertile for a bit back along also! Wonder what changes this?
I'm only NP now as I'm over the stress, about to turn 40, and feeling like my chances are quite low anyway now. Don't want to get my hopes up!

My heart xxxx

Trying4first1 fingers crossed for you hun, hope you are keeping ok!!

 

[ttc126]

Dano and Dairy, my four losses were back to back. First cycle of trying every time. Now suddenly I'm 5 months out from my last mc and zilch! I wonder if birth changes it Dano? I suspect mine is due to the d&c I had or possibly the luteal phase progesterone I'm on????
Gah I'm so sorry I can't tell you how sad and sick I am for all of us on this thread
Madtowngirl I'm so sorry ❤️

 

[madtowngirl]

Thanks for the welcome and condolences, ladies. Right now we are just proceeding with the tests - I figure if they find anything out, at the very least I can warn my daughter to check for these things if she ever wants to have kids.

 

[Trying4first1]

Hey ladies.
I not long ago suffered my 4th MC in a row. No living children.
Anyway I am being tested at St Mary's next week. Not feeling hopeful that anything will be found as my local hospital tests all came back normal including my fetal karyotyoe after my third loss.
I am looking at getting my NK cells tested. I have read that the uterine biopsy is better than the blood test. I was thinking of going to see Siobhan Quenby to get this done. Has anyway one had any experience with this procedure or with her clinic?
Also wanting to test OH for sperm DNA fragmentation. Was thinking of going to Newlife in Epsom for this one. Literally ruling everything out before even thinking of trying again.
Will ask for a list of the tests that St Mary's do when I go next week as I feel I need to be in control and on top of all this

 

[Sweetkat]

Trying, good luck with your tests. I am having an ovarian reserve test done in 2 weeks (as soon as I get my AF) and then doing IVF with IMSI with PGS (as with OH's issues with the fragmentation that's all that can be done).

The fragmentation test can be done at TCM healthcare, it was cheaper there than other places.

If your karyotype for the baby came back normal, then maybe fragmentation isn't an issue (I think it normally leads to chromosomal issues with the baby)...

Let us know how it all went. Have you had thyroid profile and your and OH's karyotype and clotting tested?

 

[Sweetkat]

I also had a chemical, sort of a 4th loss. All in a row after 3 mcs. That was end of Decemeber at 4&3. Got pregnant first cycle as ever with that.

 

[Trying4first1]

Thank you Sweetkat
Good luck with your next test. I have heard of ovarian reserves testing. Is that the Day 3 bloods they can tell from? Wishing you a successful IVF cycle. Bet you can't wait to get started now.
Yeah i was wondering if it's worth doing as I think our babies are more than likely all healthy.
I have had clotting tests and they are all normal hence why the baby aspirin didn't help with the last pregnancy.
Not sure on the others I have had. OH has had no testing what so ever. Not even a soerm test.
I have so many questions to ask. I must write them all down before I go

 

[madtowngirl]

Trying, all of my clotting/chromosome tests just came back normal, too. It's kind of frustrating, because we still have no answers. Ugh. I'm hoping we can get some testing for DH through the OB, so that insurance will cover it. Otherwise we'll be doing it through the fertility clinic. I just don't want to try again until we've got some sort of answer.

 

[Trying4first1]

Hey Madtowngirl
I know exactly what you mean. We do not want to try again until we feel confident that we have tested all that we can.
At the moment they have no recommended testing for DH. I have been told that I have to have hysteroscopy surgery to possibly remove scar tissue from my previous D and Cs. The wait is 4-5 months. Then I may have to have a copper coil fitted for 6 weeks to prevent any new scarring. So TTC is off the agenda for the next 6 months or so.
Luckily they were supportive of the uterine biopsy so will try and sort that out soon.
Don't know about you but I feel so drained. The Dr today said that even with treatment our next pregnancy may not be successful and we may need a few tries to get it right 😔

 

[Sweetkat]

I am going for my cycle day 3 bloods tomorrow (to test ovarian reserve) and then possibly starting IVF. I am not 100% but like 90% there. Other option is to try naturally but I am too scared of another MMC.

Decision time...

 

[ttc126]

Sweetkat, I'm so sorry. I didn't know you'd lost another one. I hope the bloods give good answers.

 

[Sweetkat]

Sweetkat, I'm so sorry. I didn't know you'd lost another one. I hope the bloods give good answers.

Had a chemical in December, so a4th loss (although not as bad as it being 11 weeks with loss 3).

Bloods came back good I think (not had the consultation yet but Google says is good AMB 38, FSH 4.3 estradiol 128. Low on vitamin D). And follicle count was 26-28.

As nothing else found with me apart from slightly elevated NK cells and last 2 losses were chromosomal (and possibly also 1st one) I think it's coz of OH's high DNA fragmentation ranging from 44 to 52%.

I have a test to see if any polyps etc in my uterus and then a consultation re IVF with IMSI with PGD on 7feb.

 

[madtowngirl]

I hope this is okay to ask here, but DH and I are really struggling.

At what point would you just be done with ttc and happy with what you have? We keep talking about whether or not we want to try again (we've both agreed there will be no more natural trying, it will be through the fertility clinic if it happens), but we are just going in circles. We can see us having a happy life with just DD, and a happy life with another child. I am literally going back and forth on a daily/weekly basis about what we want to do.

 

[Sweetkat]

Madtown girl, I think you have to do whatever makes you happy. I also have one DD, OH (who has the issues - male factor basically) had two other sons. He didn't want children at all to start with and would be happy if I gave up now.

I definitely want another one so I would rather have a child with someone else/ a donor than stay with him and resent him forever. I think it's especially so as he wasted years to-ing and fro-ing and because he was on medication and knew he would have issues he didn't even bother freezing his sperm when I asked him to.

So basically I definitely know that despite 3 MMCs and one chemical I want to carry on trying.

What's your fertility history? And how old are you? I am 36.

I am to-ing and fro-ing re whether to try naturally, do IVF with OH's 44-52% sperm DNA fragmentation or use a donor

 

[madtowngirl]

I am 34 and have PCOS. We've basically lost every natural pregnancy we've ever had. It took us 2 years to conceive DD, and that was done via IUI.

I know I still have time, but when I got married, I pictured us being done having kids by 35. That's obviously not going to happen now, as I'll turn 35 in August, so I know part of this is me having trouble dealing with that fact.

 

[dairymomma]

Madtowngirl-this is such a hard thing to decide. At least it has been in my experience. A year and a half ago, I was okay with trying again but only after a break because I'd just had my 10th miscarriage and it was twins. Six months ago, I was ready to be done. As in D.O.N.E. The very thought of getting pg again terrified me and it was even triggering panic attacks at times. Then we got the go-ahead to try and I got pg. I m/c almost immediately (found out at 13dpo but m/c at 16dpo) and after that I've been on the fence where my views change daily. Even though I'm pg currently, I'm still waffling. In some ways, I think I could be done and be happy and I feel a bit of pressure from my family and friends to stop trying at this point because they know what loss after loss has done to me. Yet in other ways, I don't want to be done. I want to end my journey with a rainbow, I resent the feeling that everyone around me thinks I should just throw in the towel already, and I just can't imagine that God would make me go through loss #12 or 13 or etc.

I guess what I am saying is the I've been trying to answer this question for a year and a half for myself and I don't have a concrete answer. I feel like I'm waiting for DH to say 'That is enough.' or for the dr to tell me 'You absolutely should not have more babies because of this...' or for my uterus to just shut itself off or something. I feel very much like I can't make this choice on my own but at the same time, I know no one else can really make it for me.

It doesn't help that DH doesn't like talking about it. If we do, he always says it's up to me because it's my body and my life we're dealing with but he won't answer me if I ask who would have the surgery done if I decide I'm done and he won't tell me how HE feels about this whole situation, how it affects him to lose baby after baby and see me going through it time and again. In the past, he was much more supportive than he is now and I think it's because this has been as tiresome for me as it has been for me.

It makes me think the time to be done is approaching even if I still feel undecided.

But as to a for sure 'when do we stop?' date-that's still up in the air.

 

[ReadynWaiting]

Dairy you speak as though you are in my head. Before I got pg with my son this past time I had family voice their concern about me getting pg again, not because they didn't want me to have another child but because they were concerned for my well being. My mother especially is very concerned that all of this loss and physical hardship on my body is somehow going to be detrimental to my health. I try to not let it play a factor in my decision making but it def keeps me from being open about ttc.
I think there will come a time that I will know I'm done but until then I am not. I am good with this but my God do I dread the process of ttc. I look at those that say 'hey let's have a baby' and they get pg...to later take that baby home and wonder why my journey isn't so easy. There must be a reason and maybe it's so I love my children with all that I am and live a life filled with that love and gratitude. I will take the pain if the love is greater every day, all day!

 

[Meditteranean]

Hi Everyone,

I'm new to this forum and so glad I found it. I had found another and after reading for quite some time, I realized it was back in 2005! There was no year dated but I was so invested that I read two years worth of posts! The ladies on there were such a tight knit group of about 12 and every one of them went on to have healthy babies after m/c's.

I read back a ways so I know some of your stories and struggles.

Dan-O - I can't even imagine going through that many miscarriages. My heart breaks for you.

SweetKat - I'm sorry for your 4 losses. Are you decided on trying again or not? Would your husband be on board for a donor?

ttc126 - Are you taking your progesterone throughout your cycle? From what Ive read about progesterone it can prolong your cycle and prevent you from ovulating. Generally it's taken only after ovulation is confirmed and then stopped when you get your period, until you ovulate again. Or continued from ovulation until 10-12 weeks if you become pregnant. Is that what you've been doing?

Trying4first1- I'm so sorry to hear of your most recent m/c. Have you done investigative testing?

xxmyheartxx - I see your new here also. Have you done any testing for your 3 m/c's?

diarymomma - Congrats on the pregnancy! I'm assuming since you know you have low progesterone that you are taking the suppositories already? Do you have to get injections for the MTHFR? I hope that this pregnancy is successful for you and you get your 4th healthy baby

madtowngirl - do you have your appt for your blood panel yet? Since you have PCOS has the Dr. provided any information or suggestions for you? How often do you have periods?

So I'll begin with my story. I'm 35, I have one almost 3 yr old which my husband and I conceived on the first cycle of not being cautious. I thought the next would also be easy so I planned for a summer baby. It took us a while (now realizing our failed attempts was generally caused by bad timing). 5 months of trying and we got pregnant with #2, ended in m/c at 6.5 weeks. We waited 6 months before TTC again and I was pregnant within 3 cycles (again, bad timing - I've learnt I don't seem to ovulated until later than I always thought) . I was so nervous that I was sent for HCG level testing and my tests came back fine. but after I passed the 6.5 wk point I began feeling a little better. I knew m/c's were very common. When I went in for my dating ultrasound (first scan) at 10 weeks, I was told the baby was only measuring 6 wks and there was no heartbeat. I was devastated. It completely took me by surprise. I took misoprostol a week and a half later, as my body showed no signs of ridding the baby itself. It was such a traumatic experience, as everything but the baby had continued to grow to 11.5 weeks. I birthed the placenta and baby, not having been prepared at all, I thought it would be the same as my previous M/c with clots and bleeding. The last was on Dec.6, 2016.

I started my period on Jan.1, 2017 (it was a welcomed sight and a great omen to 2017 I hoped). I am now 31 dpo. I traced ovulation through OPK's for the first time in my life this cycle and I didn't ovulate until day 21 (I got the + on day 19). My cycles have always been 28 days, 27 days here and there. So I guess I'm looking at a 35 day cycle or so this time. I'm assuming it's due to the Mc/ In December.

Sorry for the LONG post.

 

[dairymomma]

Dairy you speak as though you are in my head. Before I got pg with my son this past time I had family voice their concern about me getting pg again, not because they didn't want me to have another child but because they were concerned for my well being. My mother especially is very concerned that all of this loss and physical hardship on my body is somehow going to be detrimental to my health. I try to not let it play a factor in my decision making but it def keeps me from being open about ttc.
I think there will come a time that I will know I'm done but until then I am not. I am good with this but my God do I dread the process of ttc. I look at those that say 'hey let's have a baby' and they get pg...to later take that baby home and wonder why my journey isn't so easy. There must be a reason and maybe it's so I love my children with all that I am and live a life filled with that love and gratitude. I will take the pain if the love is greater every day, all day!

It's so hard, isn't it? I mean I get why they say things like that but at the same time, you resent it so much. And I totally agree on the dreading TTC. I HATE being pg. The first tri is the worst for me. I'm on restricted activity, I bleed for weeks on end, and I tend to miscarry around 8-9 weeks but I've m/c as late as 14 weeks so I'm living on nervous fumes for months. And no one truly understands how hard it is for me to be pg.

I also hate when people start giving me advice on how to deal with my anxiety or the bleeding or my panic attacks. It's like, I have done this before and I know how to get through it. I don't need your advice, well meaning though it is, too.

Meditteranean-Welcome! We're glad you found this forum even if we wish you didn't need to. And yes, many of the women who were on here before-including myself-went on to have rainbow babies. Amazing isn't it?

Anyway, I am not taking progesterone this time round. My progesterone is fine without supplements so I'm not on it as yet. And on the MTHFR, I'm on high dose folate (1 mg I think right now but that may change) and baby aspirin (2 per day). It's my choice not to do the lovenox injections but I made an informed decision about that after talking to a few different trusted medical professionals. I'm being monitored extra well in case I need to start any of the meds I'm not on though and so far, despite my bleeding, things look to be going okay.

Now on to you...Yes, your long cycle can be from the miscarriage. My cycles always took a few months to really settle down again after a loss and the very first one after the m/c was always a bit longer (sometimes up to 8 weeks) And what testing have you had done thus far? Have you tried any medications or supplements yet? Are you working with a doctor to find out why this is happening?

RMC is such a hard place to be because it feels so lonely. I have had 11 m/c total and I have 12 angel babies. I tend to bleeding in my first trimester and as a result, pregnancy is awful for me. I have no one who truly understands what it's like for me to be pg. Not even DH 'gets it' (and to be perfectly honest, I think he's tired of ttc simply because of how it affects me though he won't say so.) My dr is great though and having a supportive medical team is HUGE. He doesn't necessarily believe that MTHFR is my issue and he won't prescribe everything I've requested (I wanted to try steroids but he won't let me), but for the most part he is happy for me when I'm pg and he understands why I'm calling every week panicking because my spotting/bleeding changed again and squeezes me in for an appt and a reassurance scan whenever I need one. I'm terrified he's going to retire before I have this baby because I've heard rumblings about it but I don't want to switch to someone new who doesn't know my history partway thru.

 

[madtowngirl]

Welcome Mediterranean. To answer your questions, I had my blood panel earlier this month and everything came back normal. The doctor only told us we can either try again and hope for the best or go to the fertility clinic. I am on Metformin now, so I have periods every 36 days or so now, but before it was all over the place, averaging about 1 every other month.

I got my latest period only 4 weeks after my miscarriage, which is unusual. My other two took at least 6 weeks to come back.