Recurrent Miscarriage Thread

[patiently]

Hi all i am new to this thread but have just had my second mc this year...i had my first mc in February this year, had my bfp after two cycles on May 27th 2011 and began to miscarry again on June 20th...i am so lost right now i can't believe it happened to me again...and im back to square one...my dr wont do any testing until 3mc..but the thought of going through this again is heartbreaking! My progesterone levels were good this time 50 at 13dpo but my hcg levels doubled early on then they stopped doubling and only increased by 100 every 4 days...i dont know what the problem can be...i feel like i should give up because the disappointment is soooo hard to come to terms with...when i saw my bfp a few weeks ago...although i was nervous due to my previous mc..i was still hopeful and excited...i thought that this bean would be sticky and on february 3rd i would be a proud mummy...but here i am yet again...my first edd is fast approaching september 20th and i know i will be an emotional wreck on the day...i just want my little bundle of joy, i feel like a failure as a woman and that i cant give my OH something he so desperately wants...i imagine what it would be like to be in the third trimester of pregnancy and how i would play with my baby and read to them, but everytime my dream comes closer to becoming a reality the happiness is only short lived..and im back to imagining all over again...when people say "your still young" etc it really annoys me, yes i am young but we want our baby now...not when we're older...we're ready to become parents and move our relationship to the next level it just feels like we're in limbo...im so sorry about the rant...just needed to get how i feel off of my chest...hope we all get our bfp and sticky beans soon...x

 

[shangeas]

Hi all,

Im also new to this thread after 3 MC's and a chemical. I've taken a break from ttc and my boyfriend and i are bak to using protection. We havent discussed when to start again but after this last loss its still hitting me pretty hard and i cant go through that for now i guess...

Im waiting for my OBGYN to come back from holiday and give me my results as to what could be wrong with me took a bunch of tests when they did the Lap oping it will reveal what is wrong cos after 3 MC's def something is wrong. With me I never get to heartbeat stage or 7 weeks. I miscarry between 5-6 weeks.

I just want to regroup and focus. one thing i will not be doing though is clomid. I had a small cyst on my left ovary and when i had the 1st scan at 5.3 weeks it had trippled in size!

ladies some of the argon used here is very confusing can you ladies maybe make a list of the acronyms and their meaning for me if possible oh and also some of the medication and what it is used to treat so when i meet with my OBGYN I am fully informed.

GL to all who are brave enough to continue for now i will just lick my wounds and enjoy your journeys hopefully leading to successful pregnancies and births!

 

[MissMaternal]

Hi all,

Im also new to this thread after 3 MC's and a chemical. I've taken a break from ttc and my boyfriend and i are bak to using protection. We havent discussed when to start again but after this last loss its still hitting me pretty hard and i cant go through that for now i guess...

Im waiting for my OBGYN to come back from holiday and give me my results as to what could be wrong with me took a bunch of tests when they did the Lap oping it will reveal what is wrong cos after 3 MC's def something is wrong. With me I never get to heartbeat stage or 7 weeks. I miscarry between 5-6 weeks.

I just want to regroup and focus. one thing i will not be doing though is clomid. I had a small cyst on my left ovary and when i had the 1st scan at 5.3 weeks it had trippled in size!

ladies some of the argon used here is very confusing can you ladies maybe make a list of the acronyms and their meaning for me if possible oh and also some of the medication and what it is used to treat so when i meet with my OBGYN I am fully informed.

GL to all who are brave enough to continue for now i will just lick my wounds and enjoy your journeys hopefully leading to successful pregnancies and births!

https://www.babyandbump.com/forum-help-testing-area/730-babyandbump-lingo-abbreviations.html

This link should help you with the abbreviations and lingo! I don't have any experience with medications so can't help with that, sorry! Sorry for your losses and i hope one day you are blessed with a healthy pregnancy xx

 

[LeeC]

Hi Ladies

So I have been having a break from the site for a while.
How is everyone?

I'm starting a new job on Monday which def means that TTC is on the back burner for now, plus after our last failure with the steroids, I don't think I am ready to take them from ov every month just yet, so dh and I have decided to wait at least 3-6 months before we TTC again.

Tbh I am a bit gutted as I feel it's just wasted opportunities passing by, but I know how it always ends for me now and without trying the higher dose of prednisolone from ov it's pretty much a forgone conclusion that none of my pg's will be viable and even then I don't know if the steroids will work, so that's us thrown everything this, progesterone, aspirin, prednisolone, the only thing we didn't try was heparin, perhaps this may help, who knows :/

I'm trying to remain positive and it may be nice to have a break from all things baby related and just have some fun for a while. It's all become very intense, especially the last 12 months and everything revolving around TTC, pregnancy and unfortunately miscarriages, chemicals and my ectopic and operation not to mention the constant appts, hospital visits etc which cause major frustration and disappointment time and time again.

My gp has now referred to Shehata so hoping to get the appt through for Feb/March next year.
I suppose our theory is that we can handle one more miscarriage trying on our own but will leave TTC til later in the year due to having to take the steroids every month of trying and also that perhaps we can handle one more loss this year if m/c happened again, but I have become so consumed with getting pg that I think I need to take a step back and find myself again (sorry if this sounds melodramatic) outside of all this crap.

I am hoping Shehata is the answer we have been looking for and can't wait to get our appt date through, I really wish I'd gone with the referral months ago now but what will be will be. I am grateful that Quenby has given me the steroids but unfortunately she is not in a position to advise me to take from ov each month and monitor this.

So I will be popping in once in a while to see how you are all getting on.

I will still be doing my sponsored walk for Miscarriage Assoc on 12th August so please email if you would like to attend or donate.

Claire - congratulations on your BFP, I am so happy for you, really hope this is your sticky.

Pip - Great news, you will be in 2nd tri in no time.

Mandy and Stardust hope all is still going well fo you, it's very promising to read your posts.

Davies, Coco and Holly - I am hoping to see your BFP's the next time I visit, I'll bet they are just around the corner.

Padbrat and Lambs, how are you girls doing?

Heart - So sorry for your loss

And to everyone else who is new to this thread, I am so sorry you have to be here and my thoughts are with you.

Good luck to everyone and apologies for the waffle xxx

 

[petitpas]

Hi Lee, I'm glad you have a plan!
I don't know yet, but I might be following you. DH is certainly keen to go down the nkcell route.
After a bad scan today I'm back to square one.

 

[heart tree]

I'm at work and don't have time to respond to all the posts right now, but I will when I have a little more time.

To all the newbies, I'm so sorry you are joining us. xoxo

Petitpas, I'm heartbroken to read about your scan. Please keep us posted. I'm praying for you (and I'm not usually a praying person).

I went in for a scan on Monday and they couldn't see a pregnancy in my uterus. They are now trying to rule out an ectopic. My bloods have been slowly rising. I had more done today and will get the results in a little while. If they rose again today, I'll take medication to kill the cells. This is my 4th loss. I just can't believe it.

More later...

 

[LeeC]

Awww Pip, no.
That was not the news I wanted to hear returning to the thread.
What happened at your scan? Is there any chance your pregnancy is still viable.
Big hug xxx

 

[petitpas]

to you, heart tree. What a torturous time you are going through. I don't know the effect of the meds, but I hope the process isn't too physically painful. So sorry you're suffering yet another loss xxx

Lee, last week I saw a baby-shaped foetus with a brain cavity, a spine and mini limbs. The heart was pumping away nice and fast. Today, the gestational sac was a weird shape and seemed off to the side of the picture. It took a while to locate the foetus and instead of the clear image we saw last time it was fuzzy and grainy. The consultant had me move around and searched, but could not find the heartbeat. The foetus had only grown by 4mm in 7 days. Not quite enough at 8 weeks.

I'm booking in for an ERPC so that they can collect a sample for genetic testing. The best outcome would sadly be that this little one died from a genetic abnormality. With best, I mean that we would then have a reason and be free to ttc again. Unfortunately, the likelihood is high that the tissue will come back as normal and then there is no point in us continuing to ttc.

 

[petitpas]

Forgot to mention: before the op they will verify with another scan.

 

[teddygrahams]

Hi all i am new to this thread but have just had my second mc this year...i had my first mc in February this year, had my bfp after two cycles on May 27th 2011 and began to miscarry again on June 20th...i am so lost right now i can't believe it happened to me again...and im back to square one...my dr wont do any testing until 3mc..but the thought of going through this again is heartbreaking! My progesterone levels were good this time 50 at 13dpo but my hcg levels doubled early on then they stopped doubling and only increased by 100 every 4 days...i dont know what the problem can be...i feel like i should give up because the disappointment is soooo hard to come to terms with...when i saw my bfp a few weeks ago...although i was nervous due to my previous mc..i was still hopeful and excited...i thought that this bean would be sticky and on february 3rd i would be a proud mummy...but here i am yet again...my first edd is fast approaching september 20th and i know i will be an emotional wreck on the day...i just want my little bundle of joy, i feel like a failure as a woman and that i cant give my OH something he so desperately wants...i imagine what it would be like to be in the third trimester of pregnancy and how i would play with my baby and read to them, but everytime my dream comes closer to becoming a reality the happiness is only short lived..and im back to imagining all over again...when people say "your still young" etc it really annoys me, yes i am young but we want our baby now...not when we're older...we're ready to become parents and move our relationship to the next level it just feels like we're in limbo...im so sorry about the rant...just needed to get how i feel off of my chest...hope we all get our bfp and sticky beans soon...x

Patiently, your story mirrors my own. I had a miscarriage January 14th--My hubby and I were absolutely devastated, we wanted our baby so badly (my edd was August 15th. We waited a few months and decided to try again and we got pregnant (I had my bfp 5/31 with a edd 2/3/12). Sadly, I had an u/s and found out that there was no heartbeat. I am still numb, I can't believe that this happened to us again! My doc is going to refer us to a specialist who will run a bunch of tests. I will definitely keep you in my prayers.

 

[mandy1971]

Lee hope the new job goes well., enjoy the next few months and getting back to being you..will be thinking about you.. Enjoy coupledome for a while! Xxxxx

 

[mandy1971]

Petitpas and heart tree sorry to hear your news.. So unfair! X

 

[patiently]

Patiently, your story mirrors my own. I had a miscarriage January 14th--My hubby and I were absolutely devastated, we wanted our baby so badly (my edd was August 15th. We waited a few months and decided to try again and we got pregnant (I had my bfp 5/31 with a edd 2/3/12). Sadly, I had an u/s and found out that there was no heartbeat. I am still numb, I can't believe that this happened to us again! My doc is going to refer us to a specialist who will run a bunch of tests. I will definitely keep you in my prayers.[/QUOTE]

I am so sorry you are going through this also our edd were so close...after my 1st mc i truely believed i would go on to have a successful pregnancy...its just so hard to be back to square one all over again...some days i wake up and i feel fine, other days like today i just want to stay in bed all day and sleep the pain away...im also still bleeding...its almost been 4 weeks...not heavily but more than what i would consider to be spotting...i will try and push for testing also...just feel so lost and alone right now...thinking what i have done in my life to deserve this...i wouldnt wish a mc on my worst enemy...I hope you get your bfp really soon and go on to have a H&H 9 months x

 

[patiently]

sorry about the quoting mistake

 

[GillAwaiting]

Ladies Im hoping someone on here has some experience of what DH and I are going through. Briefly DH, no sperm. We magically got prego twice and both were missed m/c. We were enroute to ICSI before last pregnancy. Did all m/c testing and got results today. All turned out fine which is devastating. Nothing to work with. Clinic (in ireland no public clinics, all private) wanted us to go away and just keep trying. In short, I had a canary and told them we weren't prepared to wait around for years for a pregnancy that might happen and would surely end in m/c. Told them we needed to give ICSI a shot and if it fails we can draw a line under the whole shebang and continue with our adoption process.

So, cons changed her tune and said we should get sperm dna fragmentation test done and this might be helpful for ICSI as sperm that comes out the usual way loses some of its potential. We might have more luck if they take it out by needle for ICSI. She also said that immunology stuff would be a good route for us to go even though there is only one clinic in Ireland that caters for this stuff so we would have to change clinics. Anyone here any experience of results with sperm dna fragmentation test? and results with using the procedure with ICSI?

Or any of the other stuff for that matter. Needless to say nobody I know has been down this route and even my sister has gone to Spain for egg donation (worked by the way after every doc she saw in the U.K told her it wouldnt) so nobody to discuss anything with.

Our case has to go before the team meeting before they decide if they will even let us do ICSI in their clinic. Sometimes you can't even get help when you are paying through the nose for it

 

[LeeC]

Thanks Mandy.

We have had coupledom for 10 years
I suppose I can handle a few more months lol...

I just don't see the point trying anymore and putting myself through this stress.

We started trying 6 years ago and gave up after 2 m/c's and 1 cpg, I started working for myself so the timing never seemed to be right and tbh it was very upsetting as you know.

We have been trying again now for 2 years and after 4 m/c's, an ectopic and another chemical it just seems hopeless, especially after all the tests, specialist appts etc.

It's hard going but I will throw myself into my new job and my business part time.

Like I say one more try later this year then we get to see Shehata, after this we are done.

DH and I have spoken about this and if it doesn't work with Shehata, it's just not going to work for us, so we have discussed our life without children, which tbh devastaes me but I'm afraid this is life, and at some point a line needs to be drawn under this and I will find a coping mechanism as I know I am strong.

I suppose worse things happen.

Anyway, I am having a little cry and I don't even know why, think I'm ovulating and slightly hormonal.

On a positive note Shehata has an 85% success rate of getting women to term and midwife Louise Simmonds said to forget my age, they currently have someone in the their 40's in 3rd tri, so I'm holding onto this thought.

I hope everything is ok with you I will be stalking you. Thank you for your comments xxx.

 

[LeeC]

Hi Pip.

How you feeling today (stupid question really)
I am truly gutted for you and I know exactly how you must be feeling, because I feel the same.
I was so hoping you were making it to 2nd tri this time, everything was looking so positive, do you know life is just shit, it's crap that any of us have to go through this.

So I know you were on the progesterone, were you on Heparin also?
Have you tried the prednisolone, or is this something that you are going to look at now. I know you said DH had mentioned NK cells.

When I seen Quenby, she said that because the only pg that seemed to be progressing was in my tube despite trying progesterone therapy and aspirin in previous pg's, this would be a strong argument for high NK cells, but as you know, her funding has been pulled and she cannot do tests.

This is why I am going to Shehata now as my last option (scary eh). I have spoken to his midwife Louise Simmonds, she is lovely, she has been very helpful to me, they are slightly different to Quenby.
Quenby prescribed me 20 mg prednisolone form BFP, but Shehata would probably prescribe me from ov (which is what I tried last month but BFN) and this is what I will try again after our break.
Anyway, they have been known to prescribe 25mg from OV and then 40mg for BFP if they have tested and you have excessively high NK cells.
The midwife thought this may be what I would need but obviously it's not ideal taking high doses of steroids without supervision.
She also mentioned intralipids, so I'm waiting for my referral (unfortuanately we can't afford to go private right now )

I completely get you, as I feel the same at the moment, what is the point in TTC. I know everyone always has a friend that had multiple m/c's then bang, they get their sticky LO, but honestly, even the specialists have said this is highly unlikely for me, I love to hear these stories but to me they are never going to be my reality. It's medication all the way, these days my med comes from a very large bottle of Rose wine!!!

You've really got to dig deep Pip, the thing about you is you are a very strong woman and I can see you have a lot of respect on this site and like me, have researched and researched recurrent m/c and you will know what you need to do next and what is best for you. You are an inspiration and a good friend to many of us on here.

I think you are right to investigate NK cells now, I just posted earlier and I was told by the clinic that Shehata has 85% success rate, so despite my dreary disposition at the moment, I am positive that this will work for me and I am sure it can work for you too.

I'm hoping the test results come back quickly, enabling you to TTC again soon.

None of us deserve this and you definitly do not.

Anyway, as per usual, I'm waffling but just so you know I'm thinking about you and am sending you as many positive vibes as I can muster to you right now.

xxx

 

[petitpas]

Lee, I've been holding up (in denial) all day but reading your posts has brought new floods of tears to my eyes. You are so positive and I don't know how but you are giving me a smidgen of hope. Despite my reservations at the moment I probably won't be able to give up until I have gone down the nk cell route and failed. For me, too, that is the last option and I think I need to prepare myself that I will never carry a baby to term. It's so ironic that my DH just needs to look at me to get me pregnant.

As I already had a clotting episode before ttc-ing I kind of jumped the recurrent miscarriage queue and had all the tests before I started. So I've been on heparin since my first pregnancy (started too late on that one, though). Since then I've added aspirin, 5mg folic acid and then with this pregnancy progesterone pessaries.

Obviously, it's not working. After my first pregnancy (mmc at 11.5 weeks) I've had three pregnancies with heartbeats and yet they all die suddenly. Nobody has an explanation. I just don't know.

Anyways, I'm booked in for my ERPC for Monday morning. I think I'm going to keep living in denial until then. After all, I continue to feel really sick every evening and I still can't eat anything

 

[LeeC]

Hi Pip

Believe me most of the time I have been far from positive, but after my last m/c I have tried to put all of this to the back of my mind and just concentrate on me, that's why I had a little break from here and all things to do with pregnancy.

After my mini breakdown a few months back I am careful on how much time I allow myself to think about it these days, infact everytime I come on here I am in floods! and after discussing with my psych and dh, I think a break is best for now, boy, does this stuff play havoc with your mental health!!!

So, I am focussing on the positives in life for now, yes and building my strength back up, then it's high dose of prednisolone, progesterone, aspirin and folic acid from OV for me when we start to TTC again, and with the help of Shehata I am remaining ever hopeful.

I would honestly suggest you call Louise Simmonds (her mobile is on Shehata's website, if you leave a mge she calls you back), she really helped put my mind at rest, and in no way did I feel like she was giving me "a sales pitch", I made her aware I was asking for NHS referral and she took the time to explain to me what they could do for me etc etc, I mentioned to her I was extremely worried about having a break because of my age, and she told me not to worry about this at 38, she said she would still be very hopeful for me, a bold statement but honestly, she did instill confidence in me.

She was the one that explained to me taking steroids from BFP may not work as if you have very high NK cells you need to take them from OV in order for the steroids to suppress your immune system before implantation, it makes sense and I mentioned this to my psych who has been on this journey with me for years now and although he said he couldn't advise, off the record, he did say he would go along with that train of thought and said it would be what he would suggest (not officially though).

I am like you I only have to look at dh and I get pg, when we started again 2 years ago, we did not get a BFP for like, 12 months, we were worried and were about to look at testing then we got a BFP, we had like 3 BFP's in 6 months after that, crazy!!!

It's awful that you are still feeling sick, it's just too cruel. I remember feeling like that with my ectopic, I was just in denial, hoping that somehow they had made a mistake.

For now, I hope Monday goes smoothly and that you get some answers from the tests, make sure you get lots of tlc from dh.

I will be thinking about you, but def do not give up hope yet Pip, afterall we have come this far and we are still standing.
I am confident you will get your happy ending, and do you know that baby will be more loved than ever because of all this heartache.

Big cyber hug xxx.

 

[mandy1971]

Thanks Mandy.

We have had coupledom for 10 years
I suppose I can handle a few more months lol...

I just don't see the point trying anymore and putting myself through this stress.

We started trying 6 years ago and gave up after 2 m/c's and 1 cpg, I started working for myself so the timing never seemed to be right and tbh it was very upsetting as you know.

We have been trying again now for 2 years and after 4 m/c's, an ectopic and another chemical it just seems hopeless, especially after all the tests, specialist appts etc.

It's hard going but I will throw myself into my new job and my business part time.

Like I say one more try later this year then we get to see Shehata, after this we are done.

DH and I have spoken about this and if it doesn't work with Shehata, it's just not going to work for us, so we have discussed our life without children, which tbh devastaes me but I'm afraid this is life, and at some point a line needs to be drawn under this and I will find a coping mechanism as I know I am strong.

I suppose worse things happen.

Anyway, I am having a little cry and I don't even know why, think I'm ovulating and slightly hormonal.

On a positive note Shehata has an 85% success rate of getting women to term and midwife Louise Simmonds said to forget my age, they currently have someone in the their 40's in 3rd tri, so I'm holding onto this thought.

I hope everything is ok with you I will be stalking you. Thank you for your comments xxx.

Hi Lee, having a break from it for a while will help you to draw breath, Its been full pelt for a while for you with lots of hurdles to contend...
I spoke to Louise a few months ago very knowledgeable woman and gives her time freely., I hope with all my heart that you get success now in the next year.., you are doing everything you can and should be doing and have your finger firmly on the pulse...
I am going to continue reading this thread as there are success stories and people to gleem information from... I hope you'll still check in from time to time.. as I'll be interested to hear how you are. Stalk away............xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx