Selfish and irisponsable?

[lozzy21]

OMG I forgot to tell you what some one at work said to me on tuesday!
All the clients were still in bed so we were sat around the table having a cuppa and some breckie and since it was all female's on shift the convo shifted to contraception. I stated that i wasent using anything but comdom's as a protest as I want a baby now but OH dosent so because hes the one that wants to wait he can buy and use the comdoms. Most of them laughed and said nice one but one of the nurses who is 25 but think she knows everything said i was being selfish and isrisponsable for not using the pill because HE dosent want oneand that if i fell pregnant i would BE BRINGING AN UNLOVED CHILD INTO THE WORLD I informed her that we were living together in a stable relationship and financialy could afford a baby and the only reason he dosent want one yet if for purely selfish reasons as he dosent want go have to give up on holidays and night's out, NOT THAT WE HAVE A LOT TO BEGIN WITH!! He would love our baby, planned or not. I also informed her that i hadent asked for any one's oppinion and dont give a flying fuck what she or anyone else thinks.
She quickly appologised and went and hid in the office. Cheeky cow.

 

[sparkswillfly]

what an idoit......

 

[morri]

lol what a hobby psychologistisc bitch ..

 

[Vesta]

Wow! Since when does unplanned=unloved? What a bint! I'm glad you gave her what for.

 

[polo_princess]

I think the "unloved" child bit was harsh

 

[Pinkgirl]

Hhhmm some people think they always know better!
Good for you for telling her what for!

 

[Cinnamon]

Not only were her comments hurtful but untrue, since when is using condoms is beind iresponsible??? And why is it your job (or at least more than his) taking precautions?? , it's both your job, but specially his since he doesn't want a baby yet!!! Good for you sticking up for yourself!!!! xxxxxxxx

 

[AP]

She's totally picked that up the wrong way honey!!
Dont let her get to you!

 

[tasha41]

What a biotch.

Unplanned babies are just as loved & wanted as planned babies are!

 

[bunnyg82]

that's friggin annoying!! Condoms are a form of contraception or has she forgotten that! We've only been using them as I can't take the combined pill cos of my weight. We are both careful using them, so how is that irresponsible. You could accidentally get pregnant using the pill so her theory is just stupid. Glad you stood up to her, hope she felt as stupid as she was! x

 

[carla15x]

= / What a knobhead. . .
Glad you said summat!!
Were the other girls there shocked at what she said?

xx

 

[lozzy21]

= / What a knobhead. . .
Glad you said summat!!
Were the other girls there shocked at what she said?

xx

One or 2 said well done for putting her in her place, the rest just looked shocked because im nice and quiet at work, well i am untill iv settled in peopperly, Iv only been there 3 weeks.

 

[Sarahkka]

You defended yourself very well. She deserved to feel embarrassed after such a thoughtless comment.
What was interesting to me was her assumption that it was your responsibility to take the Pill. I find it very strange when people assume that the woman is responsible for not getting pregnant by taking care of the birth control. As though the men aren't involved somehow.

 

[princess_bump]

what a horrible comment!! i once had a boss tell me that my relationship wouldn't last, and it was less important as we'd only been together a yr at the time!! i was so mad! as i no for a fact how in love me and james are

 

[lozzy21]

The girl that said it is 25 has been with her b/f for years but is verry religious and says she has never stayed at his or him at hers as its not "propper" She has a verry 1950's view on sex and relationships.

 

[princess_bump]

The girl that said it is 25 has been with her b/f for years but is verry religious and says she has never stayed at his or him at hers as its not "propper" She has a verry 1950's view on sex and relationships.

ignore her hon, you respect her views, and she should bloody well respect your views, and i thought the unloved child was a horrible comment x x

 

[bubbles]

Well done for sticking up for yourself hun. Too bloody right it's down to him since it's him that doesn't want a baby yet. Silly bint, as my mum always told us we were all planned just not for any specific time hehe

 

[calm]

To say the child would be unloved, horrible! As for the bit about not taking the pill and using condoms, well! I know many a case of people that got pregnant with the pill but are yet to know someone getting pregnant using condoms!

 

[needausername]

sheesh! dontcha just love small minded people?

I think condoms are perfectly fine. Its just not normal to be constantly pumping hormones into your body just to stop something normal happening.

 

[Amygdala]

The unloved child bit is aweful and I hope she apologised for it. But it sounds to me like it was just a VERY bad way of getting across her point, which was (I think) that you should do everything you can to prevent a pregnancy if your partner doesn't want a child yet. And I have to say, I agree with that. I don't think you're under any obligation to take the pill, there's other methods. But I don't think that "if I fall pregnant it's your problem, I want to anyway" attitude is very fair to him. He doesn't not want a child to annoy you, he's just not ready. Imagine you're not ready yet (for whatever reason) and your man tells you he'll stop using condoms and if you still sleep with him and something happens it's your own fault. I would feel very pressured by that and slightly left alone with my concerns about not being ready yet.
Having said all that, obviously her words were completely out of order and I hope she now realises that she can't talk to other people like that, especially people she's only known for 3 weeks... Hope things get better with her at work.