Sensitive kids group

[DaisyBee]

We've just signed Megan up for 5 mornings a week preschool for next fall. They never used to offer this class - 4 mornings was the most they offered. The kids have to be 4 by March 1st to get in... And only the first 12 that sign up will be in. Megan is for sure in. I'm nervous but I also think it will be good. It's with the teacher I was hoping to get for her. We have been talking about Megan riding the bus for preschool. This would allow me to start daycare sometime. She was saying she was scared. Last night we stayed in a hotel and went swimming and went to a zoo today. Anyway - the hotel had a shuttle bus that you could take to get to a couple of different places in the city. We decided to ride it to help Megan with her fear, she loved it... Hoping it makes a big difference for her.

Her wind fear seems to be slowing down. It probably helps that the weather has improved so much lately. We had a parent teacher conference last week. Her teacher said Megan is very independent and gets along well with all the other kids. She loves school and loves to tell stories. Her favorite thing is the sensory table. She asked about her anxiety and we both agreed it's going to be a lifelong battle for her. She agreed about 5 day preschool being good for Megan. I'm hoping the routine will be good for Megan. Also she loves learning and school. She has started sounding out words on paper and if you ask her how to spell a certain word she will sound it out and spell it aloud. She is writing some words and doing crafts and drawing most of the day lately. Kindergarden is now full days. I would rather next year be tough in her vs kindergarden. And dh and I figure if she isn't handling it next fall we have the option of just not sending her sometimes. We pay for it, there is no real consequence of her missing since it's just preschool.

Overall I feel like she is doing well. Jordan just turned 2 last week. She is a handful lately. She has turned into a toddler and tantruming, screaming, whining, and overall seems grumpy quite a lot of the time. She sleeps great. Loves food and wants to snack all day and doesn't like to be told no. She has had separation anxiety pretty bad since we got back from Mexico. Last week I had her stay with the teachers for 2 different classes. One of them Megan was with her. She cried on and off both teachers said but it was not over the top and they were ok with it. ( if they cry enough the teacher brings them to the parent). But then last Tuesday Jordan didn't even want to go into the toddler room. Even with me playing with her. And she constantly asks where's mommy, where's daddy? If either of us leaves the room or she can't see us.

 

[Cattia]

Daisy, it sounds as though Megan is doing really well and I'm sure five days in pre school will be good for her. We are starting Abigail on a long day one day a week next term, so she will habe ywo mornings plus one full day where she will be in pre school 9-30. In the afternoon it's just for older ones so they will be doing more sitting down and organised activities. I think she is going to find it tiring. I really don't want to push her academically, but I also worry about how she will do starting school as she can write her name (well, she just writes Abi which she never actually gets called ) but she doesn't get the letters in the right order, it's 'Aib'!! I've never wanted to push her with literary as I think she's too young but I also don't want her to get behind at school. She doesn't really recognise all her letters although she knows some and she can recognise and write numbers.
Her noise phobia has been a bit better. My latest worry is that I notice a lot how she is more drawn to adults than other children, although she does mix fine at pre school. When we are with friends if there are two other children they often pair up and she gets left out. She doesn't seem bothered but I am worrying about how she will settle in school. We are also considering TTC again after my mc in Feb, but I'm also worried about that as she and George are so close and play so well together, I don't want to mess up their dynamic. On the other hand, it would be a good while before a younger child was old enough to join in playing anyway and Abigail adores younger children.
Polaris, how is the work and separation anxiety going? Xx

 

[OmarsMum]

Hi all, sorry I wasnt around, many things happened since new year.

My uncle passed away end of jan, it was a shock for us, there was nothing wrong with him

On feb 14th I got a bfp, we were so happy, omar was so excited about having a brother, he even gave bump a name. We saw a hb at 7 weeks, but when I went for my 12 weeks checkup there was no hb , baby stopped growing at 9w 5d , it was devastating. Hubby & Omar didnt take it well, Omar cried none stop, he didn't accept that his brother went to the stars.

Now I'm waiting to mc naturally, I started bleeding yesterday only.

Omar is doing great socially, he went to his dad's office yesterday, he was so confident bless him, he took over his dad's office room, he asked the office boy for tea, & he asked the secretary to help him finish his "work" , he stayed there for 4 hrs, he made friends there loool. He's never been there before, I'm so proud of him. It's also the 1st time he goes out with his dad alone loool, hubby is too scared of Omar, he doesn't know how to deal with him.

He is sleeping well, he's trying new food, he's too loud those days, he has his moments, he gets bored easily. He's on school holiday, I cant wait until he goes back on Sun, I feel exhausted

This is all about us, we might travel end of this month, I feel drained & I need a break xx

 

[CottlestonPie]

Hi ladies I hope you dont mind me intruding. I was just wondering when you knew you had a sensitive LO? Two of my children are quite boisterous and then I have Eddie who is the complete opposite. He is 10.5 months and very emotional. He reacts badly in busy or loud environments- childrens parties are a nightmare for him with the loud noises, fast pace, lots of people, bright colours... He suffers a great deal from jealousy (I cant pick up his twin without Eddie crying and clambering to get to me) and he seems overwhelmed by, well, a lot.
He needs a lot of one on one attention and im not sure if these things are a sign that he is a sensitive baby or if im just used to high energy wild children!

 

[Cattia]

Omar's mum, I am so sorry for your loss As you probably know, the same thing happened to me back in February so I understand what you're going through and how hard it is. I hope it will happen naturally for you soon.
CottlesonPie, hello :wave:
With Abigail I think her sensitivity has developed more as she has got older, but she has always disliked loud noises. She is quite confident socially but she has a lot of anxieties about things. I think these have become more obvious as she has got older because she is now more able to articulate them. She will ask endless questions about things because she needs to understand everything and seek reassurance. I think because I have had a lifelong battle with anxiety myself I also recognise some of these ways of thinking from my own childhood. My son is very different. He is a very demanding full on child but he isn't sensitive in the same way. He likes things done his own way but I consider it to be more a developmental thing to do with his age, whereas with Abigail I think it's her temperament. Feel free to chat or ask any questions Xx

 

[Jchihuahua]

Omar's Mum, I am so sorry for your loss .

 

[polaris]

Omarsmum, I'm so so sorry for your loss, how devastating for that to happen even after seeing the heartbeat already.

Cottleston pie, welcome to the thread. Thomas was very like your Eddie as a baby. He was very hard work and needed constant one to one attention. He is still sensitive now at four but it shows itself in a different way. He's not so bothered by noises and parties and so on but he's emotional and things do still affect him more than other children. Clara is totally different. She is a handful and very determined and stubborn but she doesn't get overwhelmed by things in the same way at all. I think Thomas is always the one who I will worry about, even though I always remind myself of the positive aspects of sensitivity.

 

[sparkle_1979]

Omar's mum I'm thinking of you xxx

 

[seaweed eater]

Sorry for your losses, OmarsMum.

CottlestonPie, I think I noticed different aspects of it at different times. I didn't know about sensitivity as a personality trait for a while, but I would say that by around 6 months I had a pretty strong sense of his temperament.

My big update is that Munchkin has done art at school twice this week! One day he made paint handprints. He had been refusing to do any kind of art, because of the mess. Around a month ago I had a talk with his teachers about not putting any pressure on him, and continuing to offer but just leaving it up to him. And he finally dared to try it! I'm proud of him and so glad the teachers were able to let him take it at his own pace. He has been noticeably more comfortable with daycare in general, too, so I think the art stuff was really bothering him. Poor boy. But so much better now. Two of his teachers have sons who are highly sensitive. It really helps -- they totally get him.

 

[DaisyBee]

Omarsmum I am so sorry for your loss

Megan was a difficult baby but I didn't know anything about temperament at that time. She cried at every diaper change. We couldn't bring her into my grandmas bday party because it was loud and she screamed her head off. Motorcycles drove by and she cried and carried on. She was 6 months. She had stranger anxiety at 4 months and wouldn't let even my mom hold her, she was a very needy baby. We couldn't go for walks because the wind and sun made her cry the whole way. As an older baby she was very cautious. She still really hasn't had any bad falls or anything because she is careful. She is loud and fiesty and let's us know that everything bothers her. Her sensitivity to things like noises, etc was really very noticeable after Jordan was born because I then remembered what other babies were like. Jordan is very perceptive and like Megan in some ways. Neither would sleep unless in a dark room with no distractions. But Jordan was never bothered by the vacuum cleaner. She didn't get stranger anxiety to the extreme that Megan did. She tolerated restaurants and other babies crying never made her cry like it did Megan. After a busy day Megan doesn't sleep, Jordan sleeps better.

 

[DaisyBee]

Oh about us lately.. I took Jordan into the er last night, she has some sort of eye infection which was so scary. We thought she was losing her sight yesterday! I was a mess about it! She also has double ear infections again! She is looking better today with meds. Megan is going to start riding the school bus Thursday. She is excited! I'm going to get my daycare started up again, dh is having major job things going on and I need to be in the position of making money so that if he needs to make a change he can. My dad's kidneys are now failing and he is seeing a specialist this week. My mom is now sick, and has been going through testing the past few weeks to figure out what's wrong - they still don't know. I had a biopsy on my cervix last week. There's just too much going on. In positive news though I'm doing way better with my anxiety and depression.

 

[Jchihuahua]

I'm so sorry to hear of all the health issues in your family at the moment Daisybee .
What an awful lot you are having to deal with.

I am struggling with Daisy a bit at the moment. I think it is related to me returning to work. She is up more than Eddie is at night and is having awful nightmares and begging and crying to get in our bed. She can't as we have Eddie in our room, often in our bed, and he is such a light sleeper. She was up 5 times last night, crying that she was scared, there were things in her room, she wnted it to be morning etc. Hubby lay with her in bed until she dozed off each time but she just kept waking agsin soon afterwards. She is very emotional again generally and gets very upset about things. She has always been confident but seems so nervous and anxious all the time at the moment .

 

[Cattia]

Daisy, I'm sorry to hear that you have so much going on. I hope all the health issues resolve themselves, and I hope that Megan enjoys her bis ride to school!
Daisy, sorry to hear that you're struggling with Daisy at the moment. Perhaps the uncertainty of you going back to work has unsettled her. I know Abigail is easily unsettled by change. I also wonder whether she could be nervous about starting school? I think Abigail is unsettled about it. We stopped talking about it as it seemed to be worrying her, but I've been discussing childcare arrangements for next year with a few people, and the other day when Abigail was talking about going to big school she knew exactly how many days I and other people would be picking her up, so she had obviously been listening in to and remembering all those conversations!
Things with us are ok. My own anxiety has not been great. I'm worrying about Abigail starting school a lot, even though It's ages away and we got the school place we really wanted for her. George has started crossing his fingers from time to time which I read was a sign of autism so I've been freaking out about that again, even though his social skills, speech and imaginary play are all strong. I'm also worrying and obsessing over my own health so all the signs of anxiety are very much there. I hope you all had a happy easter and everyone is doing ok Xx.

 

[Cattia]

Daisy, I'm sorry to hear that you have so much going on. I hope all the health issues resolve themselves, and I hope that Megan enjoys her bis ride to school!
Daisy, sorry to hear that you're struggling with Daisy at the moment. Perhaps the uncertainty of you going back to work has unsettled her. I know Abigail is easily unsettled by change. I also wonder whether she could be nervous about starting school? I think Abigail is unsettled about it. We stopped talking about it as it seemed to be worrying her, but I've been discussing childcare arrangements for next year with a few people, and the other day when Abigail was talking about going to big school she knew exactly how many days I and other people would be picking her up, so she had obviously been listening in to and remembering all those conversations!
Things with us are ok. My own anxiety has not been great. I'm worrying about Abigail starting school a lot, even though It's ages away and we got the school place we really wanted for her. George has started crossing his fingers from time to time which I read was a sign of autism so I've been freaking out about that again, even though his social skills, speech and imaginary play are all strong. I'm also worrying and obsessing over my own health so all the signs of anxiety are very much there. I hope you all had a happy easter and everyone is doing ok Xx.

 

[Cattia]

Sorry, double post! X

 

[Noodlebear]

Hi ladies, I haven't read through the thread as there's just so much of it! Lol. So sorry, I'm probably boring you all to tears by repeating something and I apologise for the long comment. I have been directed here by a very lovely BNB member following a thread I started about my son being very sensitive to noise. When he was smaller he would get upset by the obvious things - the hoover, hairdryer etc all of which totally normal and I expected him to grow out of it but he seems to be getting worse and his reaction to noises more intense. He's now frightened of the sound of a running tap, toilet flushing, creaky doors, bird song etc. Sometimes he'll pick up/play with a toy and if it makes a sound he wasn't expecting he will throw it away, come running to me (completely distraught) and cling to me tightly while burying his face in my shoulder. If I'm not far away enough from the sound he will lean and pull at me, sometimes like he's trying to climb over my shoulder to get away. We were sat in the garden recently and he reacted like that, seemingly out of no where, we really had to think to even register the sound that had set him off. This may well be a phase that is just lasting longer than I had expected, I looked at the quiz posted by the OP but my LO is a bit young for me to answer many of the questions. But I just feel so sure that this is part of the making of a very sensitive child, like I was as a youngster. Everyone seems totally surprised when he gets worked up and I explain what has upset him. There are other things that lead me to believe he's a sensitive little one but I don't know if I'm just over analyzing things now. Does this sound familiar to anyone? Does anyone have any advice?

 

[MoldyVoldy]

I'm glad I found this thread!

My son is highly sensitive. And of course he would be...both my husband and myself are sensitive people as well.

I look forward to seeing more in this thread!

 

[MoldyVoldy]

Hi ladies, I haven't read through the thread as there's just so much of it! Lol. So sorry, I'm probably boring you all to tears by repeating something and I apologise for the long comment. I have been directed here by a very lovely BNB member following a thread I started about my son being very sensitive to noise. When he was smaller he would get upset by the obvious things - the hoover, hairdryer etc all of which totally normal and I expected him to grow out of it but he seems to be getting worse and his reaction to noises more intense. He's now frightened of the sound of a running tap, toilet flushing, creaky doors, bird song etc. Sometimes he'll pick up/play with a toy and if it makes a sound he wasn't expecting he will throw it away, come running to me (completely distraught) and cling to me tightly while burying his face in my shoulder. If I'm not far away enough from the sound he will lean and pull at me, sometimes like he's trying to climb over my shoulder to get away. We were sat in the garden recently and he reacted like that, seemingly out of no where, we really had to think to even register the sound that had set him off. This may well be a phase that is just lasting longer than I had expected, I looked at the quiz posted by the OP but my LO is a bit young for me to answer many of the questions. But I just feel so sure that this is part of the making of a very sensitive child, like I was as a youngster. Everyone seems totally surprised when he gets worked up and I explain what has upset him. There are other things that lead me to believe he's a sensitive little one but I don't know if I'm just over analyzing things now. Does this sound familiar to anyone? Does anyone have any advice?

He could be highly sensitive. Give it time. Give him love . Show him you understand how he's feeling.

 

[Cattia]

Hi Moldyvoldy and welcome :wave:
It's been really quiet on here lately. I miss chatting to everyone! Hope you're all doing OK.

Noodlebear, welcome :wave:
Your son sounds really similar to my daughter. She has always been really sensitive to sounds. We tend to go through phases with her when some sounds bother her more at certain times than others. She is 4 now and she is still scared to go into public toilets because she is frightened of the sound of the dryer. ON the other hand, other sounds seem to soothe her. She loves the sound of the hairdryer (which is pretty much the same sound as the dryer in the public toilets so go figure!) and will sit on my bed and listen to it when I'm drying my hair. I have therefore figured out with her that it isn't so much the sound itself, as the suddeness or shock of the sound and her lack of control over it that's the problem. There have been some times when she covered her ears when we're out in town because she hears a loud lorry or motor bike engine, then some times the same sound won't bother her.

In general, she notices things that other people wouldn't. The biggest challenge for us recently has been birthday parties. She is very scared of the balloons bursting and she freaks out when they do. The last party we went to, she was making such a scene that I told her I would have to take her home. She then managed to calm down and by the end of the party, she was playing with the balloons! The next party we went to she was just as scared. Anyway, I'm rambling, but what I am trying to say is that in our case, I am not sure we're dealing with a physical sensitivity to the sound, as much as an anxiety issue about sounds in general. She is the type of child who thinks and worries about things a lot, asks lots of questions and likes to know all the details about what's happening. I have suffered most of my life with anxiety so I guess there is a strong chance that she will be predisposed to it.

 

[sparkle_1979]

Hi just wondered how everyone is getting on ?