Sept, Oct & Nov 2011 Mummies and Babies

[Phantom710]

As far as trips-- we're heading down to AZ ( 17 hour drive) on the 20th. I'm being lazy and taking store baby food. Also, he is starting to eat more of what we eat, minus the meat and anything his 2 teeth can't gum. hehe.

As far as surrogacy-- Little; They will be reducing if more than 2 babies happen. I know a twin pregnancy will be harder, but hopefully not horrible for me. I'm 5'10 and I carried an almost 9 lb baby with no trouble. I will be happy with just one little surro baby in there though

Finally-- Rear facing. I really wanted to do ERF, but honestly, not sure if we will. We bought a seat from Cosco that'll rear-face until 40lbs, but as my 8.5 month old is already almost 25.... no idea how long that will last. Also. The straps only have a few inches left to adjust. 1 year is my goal though. personally I don't want to do it sooner.

 

[shelleney]

Here in the UK its common practice to move into a forward-facing seat at 20lbs (approx 9 months). Its almost unheard of to have a rear-facing baby after 9 month here.
All stage 1 car seats (forward facing) are suitable from 20lbs.

The reason I moved Freya now is that she has outgrown her current carseat. The infant carrier is only suitable for up to 28lbs, however, Freya is only 20lbs and far too big for it. The straps are too tight, and her legs are too long. Her feet are squashed up against the back seat. It wasn't fair to make her travel in it any longer.

We did lots of research on forward-facing carseats before we chose one. Ours is top-of-the-range. It has the best safety features available, as well as being very comfortable and easy to clean. Freya loves her new carseat. She loves to be able to look out of the window, and she also loves it when I stop at traffic lights, and turn round to talk to her (things that werent possible with the rear-facer).

Im sure that rear-facing is best for your babies, but Freya and I are both very happy with our decision

xx

 

[flyingduster]

Finally-- Rear facing. I really wanted to do ERF, but honestly, not sure if we will. We bought a seat from Cosco that'll rear-face until 40lbs, but as my 8.5 month old is already almost 25.... no idea how long that will last. Also. The straps only have a few inches left to adjust. 1 year is my goal though. personally I don't want to do it sooner.

25lb at 8.5 months puts you up at about the 99th percentile, and looking at the continued graphs, the 99th percentile hits 40lb at about 2.5 years old... Their growth tapers off more and more, so it should last still!

There is no way you'll be able to convince your 2+ yo child to sit rear facing! lol DD1 hit the terrible two's by 18 months and was a monster!!!

lmao. There will be no other *option* for my 2+ year old! He will either sit in his [rear facing] car seat, or we won't go anywhere; no alternative. Not even a chance to forward face. I KNOW there will be fights over sitting in his seat, just like everyone has regardless of it being RF or FF, but there simply will not be an option for him to turn until he's out grown the seat.

There are thousands that rear face for 4+ years, I don't know why *I* would be unable to 'convince' my boy to do so!?? If there is no way I can convince my son to sit in his car seat to travel, what hope do I have of convincing him to anything in life? Thanks for the vote of confidence in my parenting.

 

[shelleney]

FD - Im sure LS wasnt criticising your parenting skills. Its just that she has experience of parenting a 2yo, so knows how difficult it can be. Im sure she didnt mean any offence

xx

 

[flyingduster]

I'm sure she didn't mean offence, but extended rear facing is really common and (I thought) pretty much standard practise now, so mostly everyone else rear faces their 2+ year old fine, so telling me I simply don't have a hope *is* a bit demoralising. No "it can be really difficult to" or "you may well have trouble", just "there is no way you'll be able to"!!!
I know full well the clashes you have with toddlers (I DO have experience with toddlers! Despite not yet having my own) but there is some things there is simply no option on, like car seats. RF or not!

I'm not about to let him jump off a bridge due to a toddler tantrum demanding it, and as far as I'm concerned sitting forward-facing in his car seat before he's outgrown it, IS on the same level, and is simply not going to happen.

 

[shelleney]

Im sure LS didnt mean for you to get this upset about it. Or to compare her comments to jumping off a bridge! lol. This is a forum, and often people can take comments the wrong way. What may have been an honest query, or a jokey comment, may be blown out of all proportion.
Perhaps I could've taken extreme offense to your "honest query" about my choice to forward-face Freya? Perhaps I could've felt that you were criticising my parenting skills? That the safety of my child was not paramount, because I was doing something that is normal in my country, but unusual in yours? However, I did not take offense. I just politely explained my reasons with an "each to their own attitude", which is how things should be done on forums like these.
If you are not speaking to a person face-to-face, you cannot judge their body language, facial expression or tone of voice. Therefore, comments can be taken the wrong way, and people can get unneccessarily upset.

Shall we forget the conversation about forward-facing our children? I wish I'd never brought it up! lol. So how are these 1st birthday plans comming along, Ladies?!

xx

 

[flyingduster]

ahh yes, but I realised my question about forward facing could be taken poorly due to the issues of the written word, and hence I then went on and posted "I should say I'm not trying to attack you or anything!!!!!!!!!!!" Nor did I state any facts about you being right/wrong/good/bad/able/unable/whatever. I ASKED, and then said "I thought..." thereby leaving it open to being corrected. I don't pretend to know everything and am constantly asking other mums about what they're doing so as to try and learn new things. Hence I asked you, rather than went and told you 'you're risking your babies life by forward facing so early!' or anything else judgemental.

I am actually laughing (as suggested by my 'lmao' in my first reply), I'm a bit peeved, yes, but I'm not upset. I am laughing that someone would think to be so careless as to judge me like that without having done seemingly any research. It IS very easy to misinterpret the written word, as without tone and body language it can come across so differently, but I'm afraid if in person I said "he won't hit 40lb until 3-4 years old" and someone replied with "There is no way you'll be able to convince your 2+ yo child to sit rear facing! lol" then yes, I would still reply in exactly the same way as I did. In person or not.


Don't regret bringing it up Shelleney! I love a good debate!!!!! hehehehe. And I'd have bought it up soon anyway cos we've moving to his new seat once it arrives. I have carried this on, not to bash LS, but to defend my reaction. LS is totally allowed her opinion!! So is everyone! You're all welcome to think I'm nuts trying to do extended rear facing! I have no qualms with LS at all and I'm actually really interested to see her reply. I think LS is a great mum and there is no way I can know how she does it with the twins plus Katherine; she's a star for sure!

Everyone is welcome to their opinion and thoughts, but don't anyone try to tell me something isn't possible just cos you were unable to do it. Especially when thousands of others can!

 

[Phantom710]

AHHH hahahahahaha I leave you ladies alone for two seconds------


I actually enjoy a good debate, provided that everyone (especially in regards to parenting) realize we all do what is best for our family and us.Our choices don't necessarily makes us better or worse as a parent than anyone else.

FD- Where do you find the growth chart? Where you saw that Cody will be 40 lbs around 2.5? I have found his percentile now, but have never seen something that shows what he would be at what age. ( I realize it's on average)

As for my next two cents on RF. I don't PERSONALLY feel good about FF yet. However, a lot of people thought I was a wacko for co-sleeping and that I was basically signing up for him to be squished or smothered.

Shell-- I am glad Freya likes to FF. Cody probably would. We live on private property with family as neighbors and occasionally we'll hop in the car and drive the.... block...to my BIL's house with Cody riding on our laps. He loves it. ( I should add I don't do it on public access roads :O )

LS- I actually found your "There is no way you'll be able to convince your 2+ yo child to sit rear facing! lol DD1 hit the terrible two's by 18 months and was a monster!!!" comment kinda funny. Only because I hadn't considered it, and then I looked back at my nephews at that age and realized I would have rathered slit my wrists and do push ups in salt water than trying to convince them to rear face. That being said, the other part of brain says they can't miss what they don't know... hmm..

Guess we'll all see what we do when it comes time.


AS FOR BIRTHDAYS---

I've got the day... and the theme--- that's it. Hahahaha

 

[flyingduster]

Hehe!

In the end I DO agree we all are doing as we think is best!


And as for the growth charts, I have a copy of all the charts in our child health book thingy, but you can look them up online I think, let me google them......




ok! Here are all the charts: https://www.who.int/childgrowth/standards/en/

here are the boys weight charts: https://www.who.int/childgrowth/standards/chts_wfa_boys_p/en/index.html

and the girls weight charts: https://www.who.int/childgrowth/standards/chts_wfa_girls_p/en/index.html

And here is the boys from birth to 5 years old. https://www.who.int/childgrowth/standards/cht_wfa_boys_p_0_5.pdf
It's in metric, but 25lb is a bit over 11kg, and 40lb is about 18kg. Just follow the line he's currently on ( a bit above the 97th line there), to see the average weight at different ages.

For example, Caleb is 8 months old and about 9kg, so looking at that chart that puts him between 50th and 85th, right? So if I then go up to the 18kg on the side, and follow it along until it hits somewhere between the 50th and the 85th (ie approx where Caleb is likely to be if he stays on the same curve he's currently on) it comes to an age of about 4+ years old. Of course it's totally an average thing, and he may well climb the graph or drop in it; most babies do change about a bit! But as a rough guesstimate, it is useful!!!

 

[LittleStars]

I don't even know where to begin...

I was totally teasing with my comment. Lots of people do or don't do things I do and it's their business. FF or RF at any age, weight, height and skill level is a personal choice lead by government regulations and recommendations. Clearly things are different in NZ than in Canada/USA/UK. I just pictured my DD1 one day when she was maybe 17 months old and she took a hissy fit in the drugstore. I had had enough with the behavior and so I told her we were going home, she dropped to the floor and went ridgid. I had to pick her up, stiff as a board, screaming her head off and get her into the car seat. Thankfully it was forward facing because there was literally no way I could picture her bending at the waist AND knees to go RF. That was the first of many fits. Also I was picturing the fact that they start to talk back to you and see other kids do things and ask questions and get ideas in their little heads. They can be really willful at the best of times. And the worst part is my daughter is really a good kid, very well behaved in comparison to her counterparts (it's her nature to please, not giving myself a big pat on the bak for that). Every kid is different and so are their parents. I wish you well with any challenges you are presented with as you continue to stick with your choice.

I think something we should all remember here is that we have stuck through the past few months together, sharing our lives as our little ones grow. No one here means any offence to anyone.

Now that being said and done, I really have to get back to packing. We're taking DD1 to a medieval festival tomorrow and then she's getting picked up for a cottage slumber party/birthday party with her best friend. Nevermind the fact I have to start packing for our vacation. Still trying to figure out where everything is going to go since there is no room left in the car after we put the twin stroller and a play yard in the trunk. But hey, what's life without a little challenge.

 

[hippylittlej]

Well as for getting Alana ever facing forward she will probably be ten at this blinking rate. I am going to invest in a better rear facing seat, the one we have now will do her to 4 years, but fits with a seat belt and given how long she is going to be rear facing I have decided we need to go with ISO fix birth-4, but with a small car finding one that fits is not easy.

Her reflux came back full force, worse than I could ever imagined, she has been in so much pain. Between the silent reflux burning and full force emptying of her stomach she is now losing weight. She is back on her meds and we had to cave and give domperidone which I have been avoiding as it is such a harsh drug. She just wasn't keeping anything down, even milk so I had to give her it She now is back to beyond square one and is really reluctant to eat. It is horrible and I just felt such a terrible parent not being aware of how much pain she had been in, we just thought she was being difficult.

Anyway she is much better now and we are encouraging her to eat again, she has stated to have the odd proper milk feed instead of just a quick snack. The dietician said to expect her to be wary of eating and taking a full milk feed as she has come to associate it with pain and sickness. I gave her some cucumber two days ago, normally she loves it and she just put it in her mouth and then threw it away, Alana has never done this before, she used to eat like a horse.

Apparently this has all come about because of her crawling

So my already petite baby is now just below 12lb 4oz and she is 8 months tomorrow.

My poor boobs are do not know what to do as now they are producing more milk as for a week she pretty much just latched on every 1/2 hour for a small feed.

Sorry for the depressing post, it has been such a hard couple of weeks.

 

[shelleney]

Aww Hippy. Big hugs to you and Alana xx

 

[katerdid]

I know in the UK and else where it's hard to find a ERF car seat that'll fit and that won't cost a million dollars! It's crazy! Our seat will rear face for...shoot, I think 30lbs? So he'll be toddler-ish by then. Bought it from Walmart for $140 but we had a gift card and the employee discount so it only cost around $40 hooray! We had to get it back around Christmas time as his head was coming out of his infant one lol. Weird he is in the 25th percentile but he was too long for it....

We are going to Chicago next week. My BIL got a scholarship to a prestigious band camp and my MIL is staying there for the week as they live in Florida and it'd be too much to drive back and forth. She invited us down as we only live 3-4hrs away. Even going to get us a hotel room, so we can spend more time with her. I can't wait, weird to think, but I've never been to Chicago despite living so close by. We are going to the zoo and the aquarium and ghirardelli's shop (eeee, million calorie milkshakes!!!). Oh and I researched the BEST shawarma place too - so excited to have yummy food!
And I even bought a new woven wrap to wear him around in while we are there. It's lush, and I can't wait to show it off

William is very close to walking, it's scary! He can stand on his own for extended periods of time now. I'm not ready lol!!

 

[LittleStars]

Katerdid - Your son is doing awesome! DD1 was walking at 9 months, 3 weeks. It was so scary. She was running shortly thereafter too. Definitely think about one of those tether wrist things (example: https://baby-safety-products.babycatalog.com/baby-safety/tot-a-long-holder-00105) or a monkey on your back leash or something. I found mine useful, taught DD1 quickly there were boundaries of how far she could roam. I'm going to look like a right mug though when I have one on each arm pulling me in opposite directions! lol

Hippy - sorry to hear Alana was doing so poorly with the reflux. Poor kid, by the time she walking she's going to be so skinny she won't be able to keep her pants up. She'll just have to wear cute dresses! Libby has the same problem, though to a lesser degree, issues with clothing being too loose for the length she needs, Ashley too but not nearly as pronounced as Libby. I can't even imagine how hard it is to find things for Alana to fit.

I'm giving up on packing and leaving it all for the morning despite my best intentions. At least the kitchen is clean and the laundry is all done.

I'll be back in a few days, probably more stressed than ever. Somehow vacations never seem like vacations for me.

 

[flyingduster]

Caleb isn't as close to walking as Will, but he just figured out yesterday how to climb!! Eep!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0pNz3Nxoo0U&feature=youtu.be

 

[Phantom710]

I think something we should all remember here is that we have stuck through the past few months together, sharing our lives as our little ones grow. No one here means any offence to anyone.

Well said, LS.

I think, as moms in general, whenever anyone has a different view than us, we tend to get a little defensive. I know I've done it a few times. I realize people aren't trying to criticize, but I obviously think the way I "parent" is the "right" way and when someone says "well, we do this because of this..." Yeah...

that being said......Cody officially says "dada, daddy and dad." He'll repeat them back to you whichever he says but I don't think he realized quite what it means. Right now, DH, myself, and food are called Dada/Daddy/Dad. hahahahaha

 

[shelleney]

Well done Caleb! what a clever boy!

xx

 

[Acorn]

I had a lot of catching up to do!

We are doing rear facing for an extended period of time. They keep coming out with recommendations for it to be longer, so who knows when we will go forward facing

Lauren is not crawling yet, but seems close. She pushes and ends up going backwards. She has been saying "ma ma" for a few weeks now. Not sure she fully understands what it means, but she repeats it back. I love it!

We went back to Iowa for the 4th. It was SO hot and Lauren didn't nap well not being at home. I was so happy to get her back to her bed. I attached a couple of photos of her in her 4th of July outfit

 

[shelleney]

Lauren is beautiful! What a cute little outfit too!

xx

 

[shelleney]

Extended rear facing is almost unheard of here? I wonder why that is?

xx