Shit shit shit. [update pg 20]

Okay, I'm confused. You said in another post that your parents decided what to call your daughter, and now you're saying she'd take your daughter away for talking to your daughters father. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?

This may be harsh. But you need to grow up. YOUR MOTHER CANNOT LEGALLY TAKE YOUR DAUGHTER FROM YOU. If she even tries to withhold your daughter from you, you can call the police. Quit letting her have that much control over you and YOUR child. Its seriously sickening. You can talk to the father if you want. Even if he used to be a douchebag. He IS the father. Seriously!

I hope you really take advice.
 
I don't have a job, and my parents told me a court will sign the rights over to them in a flash because I'm young and have no job or place to go :cry:
If she finds I've spoken to him I'm in so much trouble :(
He's supposed to still believe Adelaide isn't his.
But I don't want it to be that way.
It just sucks that I have no control. :cry:

Oh, and this is bullsh*t. The court would not give them custody of your child. AT ALL. This thread is literally making my blood boil. NO THEY CANNOT HAVE RIGHT OF YOUR CHILD! In fact, if they kicked you out, there ARE places that could take you and your baby in. You should NOT lie to him. That is HIS baby and you are taking that away from him. Its not fair to him.
 
I don't have a job, and my parents told me a court will sign the rights over to them in a flash because I'm young and have no job or place to go :cry:
If she finds I've spoken to him I'm in so much trouble :(
He's supposed to still believe Adelaide isn't his.
But I don't want it to be that way.
It just sucks that I have no control. :cry:

You say your parents have told you this, are you sure its not just a threat? You sound very scared of them hun, I don't know your situation, but by what you're saying I get the impression they are very strict and controlling...

FOB has the right to know the truth that he has a daughter, what do your parents have against him so much?

I honestly dont believe that the courts would take your daughter away from you, as long as you are being a good mum to her and there is no strong reason why she shouldnt be with you then the courts will keep a child with its mother!

:hugs::hugs: Big hugs, hope this gets sorted easily xxxx
 
I don't know if it's true or not because I obviously can't pay a lawyer, so all I know is what my parents lawyer supposedly tells them.
I want to talk to my parents.
But I don't want them to kick me out.
I want Adelaide to have a home and a family.
Not either or.
I'm terrified to talk to them :(
 
I don't know if it's true or not because I obviously can't pay a lawyer, so all I know is what my parents lawyer supposedly tells them.
I want to talk to my parents.
But I don't want them to kick me out.
I want Adelaide to have a home and a family.
Not either or.
I'm terrified to talk to them :(

Legally, they can't kick you out until you are 18 or they can be charged with neglect.
 
I don't know if it's true or not because I obviously can't pay a lawyer, so all I know is what my parents lawyer supposedly tells them.
I want to talk to my parents.
But I don't want them to kick me out.
I want Adelaide to have a home and a family.
Not either or.
I'm terrified to talk to them :(

Legally, they can't kick you out until you are 18 or they can be charged with neglect.

That's still true even if I've had a child?
 
To start with, I really feel for you because you are really young, and I can't imagine dealing with this when I was 15, so I think you are doing really well :hugs:

I suggest maybe writing how you feel down in a letter, when people read something it goes into their head and they think about it more and actualyl listen to it, whereas if you are talking face to face it could end up with arguments and interupting one another, as they try to make comments without actually listening to what YOU have to say! I've done it before when I had problems with my mum, everytime I tried to talk to her, she wouldnt listen, and we would end up shouting at one another, but then when she read the letter, she thought about what I had said before coming to talk to me, and we actually addressed the problem itself xxxx
 
I don't know if it's true or not because I obviously can't pay a lawyer, so all I know is what my parents lawyer supposedly tells them.
I want to talk to my parents.
But I don't want them to kick me out.
I want Adelaide to have a home and a family.
Not either or.
I'm terrified to talk to them :(

Legally, they can't kick you out until you are 18 or they can be charged with neglect.

That's still true even if I've had a child?


I don't think so. I think legally once you've had a child you're emancipated and you're parents don't have to house/feed/clothe you anymore, unfortunately.
 
I don't know if it's true or not because I obviously can't pay a lawyer, so all I know is what my parents lawyer supposedly tells them.
I want to talk to my parents.
But I don't want them to kick me out.
I want Adelaide to have a home and a family.
Not either or.
I'm terrified to talk to them :(

Legally, they can't kick you out until you are 18 or they can be charged with neglect.

That's still true even if I've had a child?


I don't think so. I think legally once you've had a child you're emancipated and you're parents don't have to house/feed/clothe you anymore, unfortunately.


No. That is not the case. When you are a minor, you are only MEDICALLY emancipated from your parents during the pregnancy, and for your child. You have the right to make all medical decisions for your child. But you are NOT fully emancipated until you get married, or a judge says so.
 
Is living with FOB not an option?? To be honest, your parents sound fucking awful. How can they threaten to take away your baby just because of who you talk to? Like someone else said, it's not your fucking car keys or a later curfew or something. Your daughter should not be a pawn that they can use against you to get what they want. That is absolutely ridiculous.
 
I could live with him but they said if I do they'll get both of us put in jail and take the baby..
 
I could live with him but they said if I do they'll get both of us put in jail and take the baby..

Why do you think they can put you in jail? They have no legal right to your child. Hell, you're not even old enough for jail, you'd go to a Juvenile Detention Center. Have you done anything to endanger Adelaide? Are you taking drugs or drinking? Are you being abusive towards her or your parents? If the answer to these is no, they cannot put in jail or take her away.

Anyway, if you have no other option than to live with your parents you need to assert yourself as Adelaide's mother. Yes, you're young, but that does not change the fact that you carried her for 9 months, gave birth to her, and will be the one she'll turn to. As long as you're not making stupid decisions for her wellbeing, which I don't see you doing at all, there is absolutely no reason for them to making decisions for you and no reason that they'd be able to take her away from you.

Is there really no family you can stay with? Grandparents? Aunt? Uncles? Extended cousins? I've had numerous offers from different family members for me and Finn to stay with them if I need it.

It sounds like your parents are being very controlling and near brain washing. Didn't they tell you to get a c-section as well?

I'm very fearful for you, Becca. This does not sound healthy for you or Adelaide.
 
Your parents sound extremely overpowering.
I'm not so sure of the laws where you are, but surely they cannot take your child away from you, and put you in jail?

If I was in your position I would be with FOB, living with him and raising your daughter together. It's so unfair of your parents to react like this, it's not fair on you, FOB, or LO. You need to stand up and do what is best for you and your daughter.
 
Yes they wanted me to get a c section and to not breastfeed. I listened to them because they're my parents and I didn't think it would be bad.
But it's getting to the point where I feel like I have no control in my life.
 
I could live with him but they said if I do they'll get both of us put in jail and take the baby..

Why do you think they can put you in jail? They have no legal right to your child. Hell, you're not even old enough for jail, you'd go to a Juvenile Detention Center. Have you done anything to endanger Adelaide? Are you taking drugs or drinking? Are you being abusive towards her or your parents? If the answer to these is no, they cannot put in jail or take her away.

Anyway, if you have no other option than to live with your parents you need to assert yourself as Adelaide's mother. Yes, you're young, but that does not change the fact that you carried her for 9 months, gave birth to her, and will be the one she'll turn to. As long as you're not making stupid decisions for her wellbeing, which I don't see you doing at all, there is absolutely no reason for them to making decisions for you and no reason that they'd be able to take her away from you.

Is there really no family you can stay with? Grandparents? Aunt? Uncles? Extended cousins? I've had numerous offers from different family members for me and Finn to stay with them if I need it.

It sounds like your parents are being very controlling and near brain washing. Didn't they tell you to get a c-section as well?

I'm very fearful for you, Becca. This does not sound healthy for you or Adelaide.

^^ Exactly WSS. They can't put you in jail, FFS!!! They really do sound like they are brainwashing you. Hun, you can't just blindly believe everything your parents say. You need to stand up for yourself and DO THE RESEARCH for yourself- you cannot be put in jail just because your parents don't like the decisions you are making (unless those decisions are illegal obviously, but they aren't).
 
And I don't know how they could. I don't do any of that, but I'm terrified to cross them and lose her
 
You can't lose her, you are her mother. The only way you could lose her is if you were unfit and doing something illegal- which you aren't! Honestly, my only advice is to get as far away from your parents as possible, perhaps by living with FOB.
 
Yes they wanted me to get a c section and to not breastfeed. I listened to them because they're my parents and I didn't think it would be bad.
But it's getting to the point where I feel like I have no control in my life.

They told you not to breastfeed? Isn't one of them a pediatrician? Breastfeeding is best, I've never heard of any doctor advising someone not to breastfeed. That's insane. If it doesn't work out or you don't want to that's one thing but telling someone not to? I'm completely disgusted.

Get out of that house and get out now before Adelaide is affected and they're doing the same controlling aspects to her. Parents are not always right. You're a mother, it is time to assert yourself to make the correct choices for you and your daughter.

I'm dead serious Becca. I'm so concerned. I'd call CPS on your parents for you but well, I don't know how exactly that would end up and I don't want you to have to move in with someone else you don't want to, however, your parents sound absolutely brainwashing. Please save yourself.
 
Yes, I thought of CPS too but wouldn't do it for those same reasons. I cannot believe that, as a pediatrician, your dad would tell you not to breastfeed. You really need to stand up for yourself. It's not about you anymore, it's about your daughter, and you cannot be a pushover about this.
 

Users who are viewing this thread

Members online

Forum statistics

Threads
1,650,189
Messages
27,141,086
Members
255,672
Latest member
mummynugs
Back
Top
monitoring_string = "c48fb0faa520c8dfff8c4deab485d3d2"