sick of waiting for bfp - come on October

[RCAFWife]

I had written out my WHOLE BIRTH STORY on here and the website logged me out because I guess I was typing too long :'( I had all the details and everything too! I will write it again later, but for now i will just do the short version.

from the onset of labor to the birth was about 21 hours. everyone was amazed at how fast it went especially since this was my first baby. By the time i got to the hospital i was already 7 cm dilated. DH called it, but I was sure I was only 4 or 5 since the contractions i was having at home weren't as bad as i thought they should be if i was progressing a lot. Pains didn't get ridiculous until transition and that was the worst pain i've ever felt. thought I wouldn't make it through to the end at times, but the midwives were excellent and so was DH. There were two midwives and DH and all three were very helpful in getting me to the pushing stage. I didn't believe the midwives when they said it didn't hurt when i started pushing against the pain, but it was hard to overcome since naturally we all try to avoid doing things that hurt us lol! But they were right, it did feel less painful to push. DH says i only pushed for a bout 40 min and then Ian was born. DH helped guide his head out but he didn't look down there because he was respecting my wishes of not looking because i didn't want him to have that image in his head Ian came out with both his hands next to his face and they were sure that i'd tear but I somehow didn't! i think it had to do with my 9 months of kegel exercises and the hot towels they held against my lady bits to help blood flow to the area to allow proper stretching Thank God for that! I was scared of tearing badly...

Anyway, Ian was 7 lbs 9 oz and 20 inches long. He got an 8 on his 1 min apgar and 9 on the 5 min one which was pretty amazing to DH and I We are so proud of our little guy

Will post a pic and write more later. Ask me questions if you like so I don't leave any important details out
I've definitely been enjoying the cuddles with Ian so far. DH and I almost fight over who gets to hold him next haha.

 

[RCAFWife]

btw, my L&D was all natural. 7 cm was too late to get the stadol i wanted but i am amazed ar how fine i was with just a hot water bottle, breathing and monotone vocalizations

 

[brit3435]

Congrats!! On the healthy baby boy and on the all natural delivery! I can't wait to here the long version of your birth story

I'm so happy for you not tearing! That is amazing! I did kegals during this last pregnancy so maybe that's why I only had to have three stitches instead of eleven

Transition is awful. I've had appendicitis and broken bones and going through transition without pain meds was the most pain that I have ever felt. They were trying to put in my epidural during that time (although at the time they only thought I was at a 5) and it was nearly impossible to stay still! Were you starving after labor? Are you still in the hospital or back home yet? I cannot wait to see a picture!!

Was everything with Ian's kidneys ok?

Congrats again and welcome to mommyhood

 

[RCAFWife]

Yeah I think the kegels really help with preventing tears or bad tears. i did them every day since finding out I was pregnant. I also used cocoa and shea butter from day one too on my belly but still ended up with some stretch marks from about 36 weeks :/ I want to try mederma cream to try to fade them a bit. We will see

I was pretty hungry after labor, but not right away. We ordered breakfast and there was enough for both of us but i ended up eating all the hot cereal It was a different hunger feeling than I had during pregnancy. Instead of burning and churning in my belly, it was more of a warm pressure in my mid back. Kinda weird but it went away when i ate lol.

We only stayed in the hospital about 36 hours so we were home by monday night. I would have stayed longer if they wanted me to because they were so nice to us there, we felt like we were already at home (other than the nurse visits every hour or so).

Since we've been home, we've had people bring us meals which was really nice. We had just bought food to make simple meals at home after Ian was born, so that we wouldn't have to be in the kitchen too long.

We didnt' make it to our u/s appointment since I went into labor so they didn't check his kidneys, just kept track of the wet diapers after he was born and he's been peeing up a storm so i'm sure he's fine now

 

[brit3435]

That is great news about Ian's kidneys! I'm so glad he came out healthy and perfect, he is so cute I love the picture!

I got two small stretch marks on my right back hip with my first daughter, they went away almost completely until I got pregnant with Vayda and then I got two new ones in the same spot lol. I'm sure they will go away with time and so will yours. I used palmers tummy butter with Vayda but I didn't use anything with Tay. My dr said its genetic and you either get them or you don't.

How is breastfeeding going? Have you tried out your pump?

Vayda has started refusing her supplemental formula. It's ok since I produce enough breast milk for a normal 3 month old but since im not nursing my supply won't increase for her growth spurts so hopefully if she is really hungry she will take some formula. I had actually planned on stopping pumping at 3 months but now that I'm pumping fewer times per day and still keeping up my supply I think I may keep doing for awhile. Who knows I might even go to 6 months...we will see.

Does Ian sleep well at night or does he have nights and days mixed up?

 

[RCAFWife]

Thanks! I can't believe how many pictures I've taken of him already. Today alone I took about 15 haha!

I'm using mederma scar and stretch mark gel so we'll see how well that works. Yeah it is genetic -- my mom had them but not this bad. she just had a few hip ones too.

Today I pumped and got 2.5 oz from one boob and .5 oz from the other. It's always like that though, one boob gives more no matter which one I start or end with during breastfeeding or pumping. The pump works great. I'm glad I got it despite some of the negative reviews about it not pumping off your milk well. It works just great for Ian and me. Pumping and bottle feeding is so quick! It takes about 35 min total compared to almost an hour with breastfeeding. Ian likes to pull and tug on the breast when he feeds, almost like he's playing with it instead of sucking off the milk! So annoying, and he just started that about 2 days ago. He's also having a growth spurt according to the midwife because I told her he's started feeding every 45 min to an hour, especially at night.

I can't believe Vayda is 3 months already!! Time really does fly! DH keeps asking when Ian will be able to grab things and play and such and I say "Don't rush him along! I don't want him to grow up too quickly!!" He says "it doesn't work that way, you can't wish him into being older or stay younger" LOL! To me, he's changed so much already and he's only 2 weeks old!

Ian used to sleep more at night, but now it's reversed. He slept about 4 hours straight this afternoon but last night he was up every hour and slept for about 40 min if so much. Midwife says around 6 weeks he'll start to assume a more regular sleep pattern. It's been hard to wake him when he starts the 4 hour sleep stretch though. He's completely out! Sometimes not even changing his diaper wakes him up enough to feed, and so I end up pumping 'cause my boobs ache so much lol! Oh the joys of a newborn

 

[brit3435]

I have the same problem with my breasts, my left produces more milk than the right. Almost twice as much. I've started drinking Mother's Milk tea and taking Fenugreek to try to increase my supply. If I could pump 4oz every 3 hours instead of 3oz it would be much easier because Vayda usually drinks 4oz per feeding. So far I've had 4 cups of tea and with each pump after drinking it I've gotten about an ounce more than usual so I'm hoping that keeps up! I agree that in some ways pumping is easier and much faster! I also found that Vayda drank a lot more when I pumped and bottle fed than when I nursed her. What kind of pump do you have? I have a Medela. You should see if your insurance covers a hospital grade rental pump, I've heard those can really increase your supply, unfortunately my insurance doesn't cover it and since its $70 a month I just use the pump I already had from my first daughter. Oh and the time it takes to pump will decrease with time, at least it did for me. I get all of my milk out in about 8 mins sometimes less, which is great especially when I have a screaming baby and a 3 year old to deal with and no one to help me.

I feel so bad for you having to wake up every hour at night! We went through that with our first and it was miserable! After a few weeks I felt like I was going to lose it! Vayda has always been a good sleeper, she slept 5 hours the first night home from the hospital and that stretch has only been increasing. Most nights she sleeps 8 or 9 hours without a feeding. I have to get up to pump though, my holding capacity is only 7oz so after 7 hours I stop producing milk.

Have you lost a lot of your pregnancy weight? I lost the most in the first two weeks, then it slowed down until about 6 weeks. Now I only lose about 1/2 a pound a week and I don't lose any if I eat a ton of sweets, which I do LOL. I'm down to 122 so I'm only wanting to lose another 4 lbs. I think it might not come off until I wean though.

 

[RCAFWife]

I have the Dr. Brown's Simplisse breast pump. I wanted that one because I've heard and read stories about the other pumps causing chaffing of the nipples and I didn't want that for my first experience with a pump. I didn't want to chance it. This pump feels great and it pumps off the milk from my right boob fairly quickly. It said that some moms won't get anything off the first time using it but I got an oz from each the first time. Tonight, i got my usual 3 oz off the right boob in under 20 min when it used to take 30 or 40, so I think my boobs are getting used to the pump now. It's great 'cause Ian only partially feeds from each breast if not just one, and so i'm left hanging and that's where the breast pump comes in to save the day (or night lol). Now that we're feeding him pumped milk at night, he sleeps for 3-4 hours at a time so we have caught up on some sleep. Not all of course, but some The pediatrician said that he seems like a "lazy feeder" since he mostly plays around with my nipples or gets bored/tired during feeding and just falls asleep. She says giving him pumped milk will help him feel satisfied faster and sleep longer, but that i should still try to breastfeed by making him wait longer to feed when he starts to fuss so that he becomes more aggressive at the breast. We'll see how that goes

I lost about 20 of the pregnancy pounds so far. Just have 6 lbs to go to get back to pre preg weight. But like you said, it'll probably come off after weaning because I swear, most of that extra 6 lbs is all boobs!! I look like I got a boob job

That's so awesome that Vayda sleeps that long at night! I hope Ian doesn't take too long to get to that point. My friend's baby still doesn't sleep through the night and he's 3 years old!!

 

[brit3435]

Wow 20lbs already that is fantastic! You are so lucky you only put on 26lbs I put on 35 luckily its coming off a lot faster this time. It took a year to get under 120 with my first. It didn't help that she was born during the hottest year on record for Wichita. It was 110 degrees outside all the time so I hated to get her out even just to go to the gym, it was just way to hot for an infant! Today we all went for a one mile walk, I carried Vayda in the moby wrap and she loved it, it felt like a good workout too.

I know what you mean about the boobs...I wear a 34 D now instead of my normal 32 B. I've never breastfed for this long so I wonder what my boobs will look like afterward, I hope they don't get saggy! I only breastfed Tay for a month and when I stopped producing milk they got really tiny and flabby! I was horrified that it was permanent, but after a few months they filled back in and I ended up being a bit bigger than I was before even though I weighed less. I hope that happens this time too, but I'm not looking forward to that deflated boob phase and I certainly don't want to go through that this summer! More incentive to keep pumping LOL

Is your husband still off for paternity leave? Are you planning to stay home with Ian or do you have a job to go back to? How is your husband adjusting to life with baby? Have you thought about having sex again? We have had sex twice this week, its not like before mainly because I'm not in the mood like I used to be, but its so nice to feel like a couple again. It isn't as comfortable as it was before, but the last few times it hasn't hurt, just felt like a pinching or a slight burning sensation. I took your advice and we used a ton of gel that helped a lot!

Here is a picture of Vayda from today, she is getting so big and her personality is really developing.

 

[RCAFWife]

Aww Your children are beautiful! Thanks for sharing the photos. Your ticker says it's Tay's birthday? Happy birthday to her! Did you have a special theme for her birthday?

I'm waiting for a warm day to take Ian out for a walk. My midwife says to hold off on exercise other than walking until at least my 6 week check just because I had that hip problem during pregnancy and all the ligaments and joints take longer than anything else to heal up. But it's been chilly here for the last little while and it was supposed to be warm this weekend, but looks like it won't be :/ Maybe next week!

DH is adjusting well to having a baby around. I'm surprised because he usually gets frustrated easily when things aren't happening as fast as they should or if things aren't easy. He's handling the frequent feedings and night time disturbances quite well! He even jumps up to get the baby and changes his diaper before I can even open an eye lol! Now that he's back at work, he texts me often during the day just to hear the latest "Ian news" He's going to take some more time off later this month and then he can have more time with Ian. I wasn't working before I got pregnant so I will be staying home for a while. Don't know if I'll get to work any time soon but we'll see.

I'm afraid of my boobs getting saggy too!! I didn't think of that until you mentioned it, but it's so true. Some women do get really saggy boobs that never snap back! I swear my boobs keep getting bigger. I took a measurement today to determine my new cup/bra size and the chart showed that I'm a 29 F, which doesn't exist lol! Not that i've found anyway. That's totally a porn star look, ugh! I'm going to try to get out to get some new nursing bras since the ones I bought while pregnant hardly even cover my new boobs

My midwife asked me at my 2 week appointment if i had tried having sex yet and I was like, "NO WAY! Are you kidding?? I'll be waiting the full 6 weeks tyvm!" She wanted to know what birth control I was thinking of using once resuming sex so that's why she asked but she said I'd want to have sex again believe it or not. Right now, I feel very protective of my lady parts. They just pushed a whole baby out of them and they are still traumatized lol. The perineum is still stretched and kind of bunched up like the skin has folded up on itself or something. It's not as bad as it was a few days after birth but still isn't the same. I'm keeping up with the kegels to try to get it back into shape When we do try sex again, I'll definitely be loading up on the jelly

Ian's already fitting into 3 month size onesies!!! He's getting bigger before my eyes and I'm not ready!! Next thing I know he'll be asking us to borrow the car! At least I know he's getting plenty to eat. I started adding a little formula to his night time bottle of pumped milk and he slept for almost 4.5 hours last night! I tried it again tonight but it took him more than an hour to fall asleep (that's why I'm on here writing at 4 am!) Hopefully he'll sleep til 6 since I fed him at 2 am...*sigh* at least I stayed out of the bedroom with him so that DH could sleep for work tomorrow

 

[brit3435]

I waited until 6 weeks pp to start exercising again as well. The chance of injury is way higher until everything is back to normal. It may take longer with your first pregnancy too for your body to get back to normal. At least it did with me and I had severe pelvic and hip pain with my first as well. I started to feel normal again and able to do the things I could before around 9 months pp, however I put on a lot more weight than you did

My boobs were a lot different with my first time breastfeeing as well, don't worry they will get smaller! Mine were a size E in the beginning with Tay, but they dropped down to a D. This time they never got that big even though they started out slightly bigger. They aren't hard and implant looking anymore either unless I go 8 hours without pumping. Most of the time they are pretty soft and full looking, I'm just afraid when I stop pumping they will still be soft but loose the full looking aspect LOL. Bummer...

As far as sex I don't blame you one bit for waiting. We tried for the first time at 7 weeks pp, my dr. said my tear was healed and it was OK to try but it was painful and we weren't able to enjoy it at all. I'm sure it will better for you though since you didn't tear

Well Vayda slept for 12 hours last night without a feeding. Crazy good sleeper this girl is! Its supposed to be in the 70s here today so we are planning to walk to the park later.

I'm a stay at home mom too. I used to be an executive store manager at Walgreens but I worked very long hours and only had one day off per week. I love being at home with the girls, I wouldn't trade it for anything. I went to daycare from the time I was 6 weeks to 6 years old and some of the experiences weren't good. I don't think I could ever leave my girls with someone who wasn't family. My 3 year old is going to start preschool in June and I'll probably be that mom that hovers. LOL

 

[RCAFWife]

12 hours??? That's amazing!! Congrats to you! That must have been nice to sleep as long as you wanted (maybe not the full 12 hours haha).

Did either of your girls ever cry in their sleep as infants? Ian started that last week or so and he looks like he's awake and ready to be picked up, it's that kind of crying, but then he goes right back to sleep without even opening his eyes! It's kinda freaky and I've never heard of any of my other friends' babies doing that. He also still sleeps like he did in the womb - hands beside his face, lying on his right side with his left leg bent and crossed over his straight right leg lol!

I wanted to get out and walk while the sun was still up but Mr. Ian here decided he wanted to feed again before we went out, and then he took his sweet time (2 hours) to finish so we didn't get out til nearly sunset But he was really gassy for some reason so we had to stop and burp every 5 min or so. Weird...but the feeding after we got home was better, although he never made it to the left breast - he fell asleep...*sigh*

 

[brit3435]

Yes Vayda occasionally cries in her sleep but goes right back to sleep, it happens every other day or so. I don't get her up at night unless she fully wakes up, most of the time she only partially wakes and goes back into a sound sleep. I'm pretty sure that is normal my 3 year old does it too but less frequently maybe once a week.

Do you use a moby wrap with Ian? I take Vayda for walks in that and it actually seems to help her gas, maybe from all the bouncing and being snug to my chest? After the warm day yesterday I'm so ready for summer! It was nice to let Vayda go barefoot. I'm just not sure what we will use for Vayda to sleep in once it gets warmer. Right now she uses a sleep sack but soon those will be too warm. What does Ian sleep in?

Wow a 2 hr feeding?! I don't think I could handle that! My nipples would be so sore!

 

[RCAFWife]

OK so Ian isn't the only one who cries in his sleep hehe

I have a homemade moby wrap. One of my friends had a how-to video for making one so we made a couple one day. Ian likes to be in it and he usually goes right to sleep once I put him in it. I had a sling as well, but since I ordered it while I was still pregnant, it doesn't fit anymore because of my new boobs I'm going to get another one because it's easier to use that for quick in-and-out errands rather than getting out the whole stroller.

No, no. I wrote that wrong. I meant to say that i had to burp him every 5 min or so yesterday during his feeding, not the walk haha! He had so much gas, he was burping and farting at the same time. Maybe it was something I ate the day before that ended up in the breastmilk but not sure what it was. Ian usually plays around with my nipple once he's "full", and then 10 min later he'd come back for more, so that back and forth ends up taking 2 hours at times. I say that in quotes because he snacks rather than takes the full milk meal when he nurses. The pediatrician says i should try to make him more aggressive when feeding by basically starving him lol - so wait 5, 10, 15 min once he starts looking hungry or crying so that when he gets on the breast he'll actually drink and get the full thing. it's worked a little so far, but Ian has a mind of his own. he'll do whatever, whenever lol. He's back to sleeping a lot and I end up pumping if he goes longer than 3 hours, which is when my boobs start feeling engorged.

 

[brit3435]

Hey how are things going with you and Ian? I just got over my first ever episode of food poisoning I was so sick that I couldn't even keep water down for 2 days. My milk supply dropped to nearly nothing and my husband had to stay home from work bc I could hardly get up much less take care of a 3 year old and a baby. I lost 7lbs too, it was crazy. I'm feeling better now and thankfully my milk supply is almost back to normal now. I've been eating normally for a few days now and gained back 2 lbs. ugh it was the worst sickness I've ever had. Vayda didn't sleep well either while I was sick she woke up to eat at 4am both nights when I was at my worst so my poor dh had to deal with everything all by himself now things are getting back to normal though and Vayda is back to sleeping 10 or 11 hours and enjoying my breast milk. It was so weird but what I did pump while I was sick she wouldn't drink! It must have tasted different to her

Anyway here is a pic I took of her last week

 

[RCAFWife]

Oh no! Sorry to hear you were sick That sounded terrible whatever you had, yikes! I bet you're happy that it's out of the house now.

my mom and sister came to visit so ive been super busy the last couple weeks. now Ian spent today being cranky and slightly feverish though his temp was only 99.7 but i think he was just too warm because removing clothing brought his temp down. he might be going through another growth spurt though because he went from nursing every 4 hours to every 2 hopefully it'll only be for a few days...
afm, not only do my hips still hurt but also my wrists, fingers, knees and ankles! im gonna go see a doc this time and hopefully they can help me.

how are you doing? what's new?

 

[brit3435]

Well on the heels of the food poisoning the girls and I have both been sick this week. Fever, body aches, cough and runny nose. This was the first time Vayda has had a fever and the first day she was sick she wouldn't eat. She had about 7 oz over the course of 15 hours and had me nervous! I was thinking about taking her in but she was happy otherwise and showing no signs of dehydration. She is eating more now but still only about 24oz per day compared to her normal 32oz. She goes in for her 4 month check on Monday so I will check with the dr then if she is still sick. It's been a fun couple of weeks though. She has started rolling front to back and back to front and she has begun to sit up with less assistance. I really hope she starts crawling early like her sister bc right now she thinks she needs to be held all the time and it's been hard on my 3 year old who also constantly asks to be held it's impossible to hold both of the bc Vayda not only wants to be held but walked around as well. When I sit down with her she cries. My oldest was the same way at this age and it passed when she started to crawl at 5 months so hopefully by the summer we will be through with this. I have gotten to the point where I have to lay Vayda in her crib and let her fuss just so I can read and cuddle with Tay for 10 mins bf her nap. I hate doing that too! I don't know how moms of more children do it! Still doing well with pumping (why I'm up right now lol) I have tried so many things to improve my supply from 24 oz per day and nothing has really worked until now. Orange juice! I had fresh oj on this week while sick about 2 cups per day and have started pumping around 28oz per day!

How is everything going with you guys?

 

[RCAFWife]

Sorry you guys were sick again! Can't seem to catch a break huh! Hopefully you guys are feeling better and on the mend soon!

That's great Vayda is sitting up now! It seems like just yesterday you were announcing to us that she was born Time really does fly!

Have you tried fenugreek for increasing milk supply? I heard that it, along with oats and almonds, were good for that so I bought a bottle of fenugreek capsules but haven't even opened the box yet since my right boob produces so much! Today after a 4 hour nap I had when DH was watching Ian, I pumped 6 oz just off the right breast alone! IT's been steadily increasing as Ian grows but it's still a lot more than he would drink. The most he's had from a bottle was 4 oz and that was pushing it.

I don't know how moms of more than one kid do it either, but it sounds like you're getting the hang of it Good job, mom!
One of my friends here has a 3 year old and an 8 month old and when they came to visit us at the hospital, her 3 year old thought Ian was going home with them! She got so anxious and kept saying "no no no!" lol poor thing. She wasn't ready for another baby in the house just yet

 

[RCAFWife]

Oh and this week we also started putting Ian to sleep in his own room! He did 2 hours the first time, and tehn 4 hours. Now he's realizing what's happening I think because he cries after the first 15 min or less. We will try more later this week. we want to ease him in

 

[brit3435]

I am so jealous of your milk supply I think I would do a cartwheel if I ever pumped 6oz from one boob!

That is great that he is doing well with moving to his own room. Vayda actually slept much better once we moved her into her room and shut the door. She prefers quiet when she sleeps though and dh snores and my 3 year old makes noise in her sleep occasionally.

Did you ever go to the dr for your lingering hip pain? What did they say is causing it?