Sleep Sense Support Group!

[TennisGal]

Nigella has referred to scallops as 'coral plumptious beauties'...

It

Is

A

SCALLOP, Nige?!?!

 

[rubywoo77]

Hi ladies

I hope you don't mind me joining you. I started the program tonight (just wrote a really long post about it and then laptop died on me).

Long story short - my daughter was a great sleeper until I went back to work and she started going to family who would rock and cuddle her to sleep - since then she will only sleep if me or husband lay in bed with her - we would have to transfer her once she was sleeping and she gets up between 12-3am and gets in with us (will not settle) - neither me or hubby have the energy to settle her.

Anyway first night tonight - it took 25mins to get her to sleep - with 2 visits from me to shush and soothe her - she was sick too and pretty much screamed and cried for the whole 25 minutes (I was stood in the hall way listening and crying my eyes out myself.

I feel pretty crappy at the moment - does it get easier? - I feel terrible at having made her cry.

 

[TennisGal]

Rooby

It DOES get easier, and so quickly! I felt hideous when we started (more tears from me than Lizzie, am sure), but - honestly - you'll see the difference in a few nights.

If it's easier, you can sit next to her cot/bed while she settles? I did that - sang quietly etc?

Do stick on the thread, it's a great support.

 

[Arcanegirl]

It does get much easier
Stay strong and post here everytime you need support and feel down about it.

 

[rubywoo77]

thank you ladies,


I think it was the screaming coupled with the being sick. Can I sit in with her if I didn't sit in with her tonight? - like will it just take me back to square one, and also can I go in sooner than 5 minutes say every 2minutes?

thanks again

 

[Arcanegirl]

Sleepsense is about doing what you are comfortable with. If you feel comfortable with 2 mins, then id add a minute onto that to make it 3. At your comfort but just past it to allow enough time for Lo to try and settle.
I would also try and gradually work on it to stretch up to 10 mins, that seems to be the magical number for when they settle but dont go stright to that if youre not happy with it.

im pretty certain there is a part in the book that gives you the option to sit in, though im not clued up on it as Alex always preferred to be left alone.

 

[Poppy7]

Nigella has referred to scallops as 'coral plumptious beauties'...

It

Is

A

SCALLOP, Nige?!?!

TG, you're hilarious!!!!xx

 

[Poppy7]

Hi Ruby,

It does get easier Older babies tend to be a bit more strong willed but they do take to it quickly. I agree with Arcanegirl, do what you feel comfortable with. SS is about settling your baby without them feeling abandoned so if you want to stay with your LO, that's fine. Some of the ladies have found that staying with their LO's makes the situation worse so you gave to assess what works for you

--------------------

On the Otto front he was a very good boy last night but I feel like the worst Mummy in the world. I heard him coughing at about 11pm but he's had a cough for a while now so it wasn't unusual to hear. He didn't even wake up and cry so I let him go. At 5am he woke for a feed. I fed him and could smell that he had filled his nappy As I got up from feeding him to change him he was sick everywhere I put the light on so I could clean up the floor and that's when I saw he had been sick in his cot and it was dried in his hair. I felt terrible as that must have been the coughing I heard earlier in the evening and the poor mite had been sleeping in it. What a cr*p Mummy I am. I cleaned everything up by which time he was quite awake but the little gem settled down and went back to sleep until 7.30am. I bought him in bed at that time for a snuggle and a feed and he was very cuddly and kept trying to sleep on me. I took him downstairs for breakfast and at 8.30am he threw all if his milk up again. He didn't want toast for breakfast so I gave him dry Cheerios as I thought milk may upset his tummy again. He went back to bed at 10am and has just woken up.



We are meant to be going to our local soft play today in celebration of his birthday but we may have to give it a miss. I'm waiting for a call from the Doctor to make a decision based on what they say. It may be food related bur if it's something nastier I don't want to pass it to the other children.

--------

 

[history_girls]

Wow a quiet week followed by a manic week on here.

I'll do our news first. Yesterday evening was awful she cried from the moment I collected her until 90 minutes later when I put her to bed early. I had a bit of a wobble about work and life and my anti-social child. It was Granny's practice run at bedtime so that had to be abandoned. No idea what was up - massive seperation issues I think at the moment but then today when I picked her up a little early she was a super star and, drum roll please ................ has done proper walking i.e. got herself up and walked across the lounge, I caught her on the flip later so that was fab. Her cough is awful but hoping in time it will go - antibiotics finish tomorrow so we will see what happens after that.

Ruby and welcome It is so tough to start with and especially with an older baby. I've cried many a time along with LO as she learnt to self settle and sometimes now I still do when we have a bad night but but but in the long term sleep sense is so worth it. I think it might take a few nights for you to discover what works e.g. staying or going etc... you might have to do trial and error. Fibby hates me staying now as it winds her up. Also I know it is hard not to feel bad at making her cry but you wouldn't let her play with scissors and she would cry if you took them off her, sleeping on her own is soo beneficial that a few days or a week of crying in the long term is worth it Just come on here for some support!

Poppy for you and Otto to - don't beat yourself up you can't foresee everything, my OH begs me not to check on her when we go to bed incase I wake her but I always do.

Polaris - Happy Birthday weekend. Massive for you too - I once shouted at my OH when I first went back to work that I was a crap mum, crap teacher and crap all rounder as I felt I was spreading myself too thin. Our swimming on a Sunday is our special mummy-fibby time. I don't cancel it for anything. hang on in there you will find a rputine and work/life balance that works - for me it was dropping a day.

AG- what bedding does alex have? Is he in a bag? I saw grobag did special toddler bedding with zips and i was tempted. Glad Alex is getting there!

TG - what are you like with old Nigella OH bans her from our tv as he finds her erotic handling of food too much (I won't let him ban Gok though!!!)

if I;ve missed you out sorry but my waiter has brought my steak!

 

[Arcanegirl]

HG

Alex has a duvet and pillow, a normal single duvet at 13.5 tog. Seems alot but he uncoveres himself when hes too warm
He had a duvet in the cot, we tried a sleeping bag again in the bed during our off week but he fell out of the bed Dont know if it was the bag or not but hes not been back in it.

Its OH's turn to try getting Alex to bed tonight and im a bit worried. He tried last night and i had to take over as he didnt get how to coax Alex to stay in the bed.

 

[Poppy7]

Ladies, I'm so sorry. I just read my last post and somehow it ended up back to front so you may want to read it again

Well, soft play was abandoned for us. Poor Elliott has been sick and lethargic all day. He perked up a lot late afternoon and actually ate a lot at tea time. I was worried about giving him his bed time milk as that has made him be sick the most but fingers crossed he's asleep now (has been since 7pm) and no more sick. Elliott had lots of visitors today (well, from the front doorway, no one came in as they didn't want to catch the virus). Most of them were our friends who we were meant to be meeting with today. Hopefully he's over the worst of this bug and will be right as rain on Sunday. I have just spent the last 2 hours making his birthday cake (thank you TG it looks delish!!).

HG I'm so sorry you had a rotten evening yesterday you can always have the trial run another day. However, it sounds like Fibs has made up for it today! Walking? Yaay!!!! What a clever girl. There will be no stopping her now!

I hope Alex's bedtime went well tonight Arcanegirl. He will soon get used to you both putting him to bed.

 

[Arcanegirl]

He stayed in bed for daddy this time, the lil bugger
Glad he went down okay though!

 

[history_girls]

Poppy - poor you and Otto he has been through it this last month with bugs and poorlyness hasn't he. Hopefully he will be up to form for his birthday - what bad timing. Take it easy now he is in bed.

AG - Go Alex and Daddy! Brilliant when they do it for Daddys too!

 

[rubywoo77]

Hi everyone,

well last night went well - she woke up a few times in the night, kinda like she was still asleep - let out a little cry and then straight back to sleep, she was still asleep at 8am this morning - so 7.30ish to 8am is a success as its the first time I can remember her sleeping that much for months.

Tonight hubby has a boys night out but promised to stay with me until we settled her. I put her in her cot gave her the blanket and her bunny and she started crying almost immediately. But she stopped as soon as I left the room, she didn't cry at all no whimpering - nothing, I was so worried got hubby to check (he is qieter - I am heavy footed )and he said she was just sat in her cot with her back to the door. That made me cry again (I don't know why - I just felt crappy that she might not be crying because she know's I won't come - stupid I know).

Anyway I got him to check again and he said she had fallen asleep - I went in about 10 minutes later and straightened her out and put her blanket on her properly. But she has been waking up every 10 minutes since 8 - she kinda cries for a few minutes and just when I am getting ready to go into her - she stops...

I have read about the staying in the room option but I think me staying would make her worse as when I was going into her last night she just cried/screamed harder. Thank you so much for the replies- it has given me lots of reassurance - still feeling a bit wobbly but I think that is my own feelings towards leaving her because rationally I know she is ok.

thak you again ladies

 

[TennisGal]

Aw, Poppy Big for you, and for the lovely Otto. As HG says, don't beat yourself up...we all do the same at night, and you certainly weren't to know he'd been sick Just think, he's going to have all this out of the way now...and no more nasties. I really hope he feels better, and that he enjoys his birthday cake and birthday. I am sure he will. Let us know how he is

HG - on the walking!! Go Fibby!!! She'll be non-stop now I hope her separation anxiety gets better...we're going through similar (update below!)

AG - go Alex He's doing so well!!

Well, news from Maison TG. I've had an interesting day! Basically, clients have no understanding that I don't work 24 hrs a day, and just kept phoning me up about a certain project I'm working on. I appreciate it's something they want continual updates on, but FFS. I'm not the only one who's working on it, and I am not working today. Blooming designing blooming buildings! So, I'm going to take my toys and throw them at fellow architects who should have been helping said clients *and breathe*

Lizzie La Diva has been Mummy-centric today. She has literally not let me put her down...even when on the phone, I had Lizzie cuddling into me, grabbing my hair/boob/neck with one hand, and sucking her thumb with the other. If I put her down, she burst into real ones, held her arms up and said 'noooo mama', which would melt the hardest of hearts...so my very soft and mushy one didn't stand a chance. So, it's been an interesting day of plenty of cuddles. We went for tea together (well, tea for Mummy - and shared berry cake) and I came back with cake rubbed in my hair and ears, such was her need to hold onto me!

I think it's her teeth, as she's lots more coming through. She's just so lovely and snuggly, we ended up falling asleep together for a little while.

I hope she's ok this weekend, as we've family staying - and I want her to have fun.

I've just scrubbed the shower, fallen over in it, bruised my butt (am sure) and then tripped over idiot cat. So, am going to sulk with a cup of tea and answer building based email!

 

[TennisGal]

I was so worried got hubby to check (he is qieter - I am heavy footed )and he said she was just sat in her cot with her back to the door. That made me cry again (I don't know why - I just felt crappy that she might not be crying because she know's I won't come - stupid I know).

I found Lizzie doing that one evening, burst into tears - and scooped her up. She then wailed and looked at me in shock! I think she'd been winding down, and I'd totally ruined it!! Don't feel bad maybe she was doing the same? If something was wrong, she'd cry and let you know...she's got a lovely Mummy, so she knows to let you know when she needs you

 

[Arcanegirl]

Heres one for you....
11am Alex goes into his room and shuts the door, weve not paid any attention as he does this alot and just happily plays in there. A while later hes not come to the door to be let out, so i turn the cam on and hes sititng in bed, OH wants to go get him but i say no leave him as hes not crying or wanting out.
10 mins later hes laid down on his bed and eventually went to sleep! He slept prob around 90 mins!

Funny thing is he shut the cat in there too who also slept

 

[hivechild]

Hi ladies,

Just a quick hi. The monkey is sick with a cold and seems to be teething to boot so needless to say things aren't rainbows and sunshine around here!

Hopefully I get a chance to catch up properly soon but until then, here's going for good sleep for all!

AG - That is too funny! I hope the day comes when Ronan just goes and puts himself to bed like that!

 

[history_girls]

AG - What a boy you've got there!!! He must like his new bed arrangement and feel really comfortable with it! Hope tonight was as good.

We;ve had a strange sleep day - She got up at 7am and then had a 3 hour nap at 9.30 - so I thought great, finally we might have a one nap day that I've been aiming at. But when she got home with OH from the in laws she was tired but by now it waas 4.30 SO i thought give her 30 mins then waker her up - oh boy never do it...... she was soooo grumpy when OH woke her up it was a nightmare until bedtime. We live and learn!!!!

TG - bloomin clients - they sound like Senior Management Team to me, thinking I have nothing better to do than answer their stupid questions - hope they left you alone. How was the seperation issues today, Fibby was a lot better but not after her late sleep. (hope your bottom is better - I must admit it made me snort out loud in a very undignified manner )

Ruby - how was tonight?

Poppy - how is little Otto? Fighting fit for the big day? Here is hoping!

HC -

 

[Poppy7]

Hi ladies :wave: the good news is Elliott hasn't been sick since yesterday :woohoo: He had nasty diarrhoea and still wanting to sleep a lot but hopefully he's over the worst of it now. We took Otto to his first family fireworks tonight and he loved it! I was also amazed as he kept a hat on his head! A cool dudey one with ear flaps....it was very cold.

He went to bed like a dream and me and OH have been wrapping up his trike (crikey, that wasn't easy!) and decorating the house for him. I can't believe he's one tomorrow!!!!

TG, I feel for you where clients are concerned, they just don't give a damn. Oh, and I hope your butt is okay today! Thanks for the hugs I just felt so awful that I never checked . I hope you are having a fun weekend and La Liz is on top form.

HG, Fibby will get their with her one nap a day. She's just not ready yet. Otto sometimes wakes up miserable from naps and I have no reason why :unknown: It isn't always due to not sleeping enough either as this has happened after long naps too!!

AG, that's amazing. Bless your little boy. Bring on the day Elliott decides it's nap time and puts himself to bed! The closest we get to it now is he collapses in the dog bed (not the most pleasant place) and rolls around!

HC, poor Ronan. He's certainly going through a lit right now. I know how you feel and it must come to an end soon. I hope normality returns soon for you

Ruby, you sound like you are doing great. How did tonight go?