Sleep Sense Support Group!

[Foogirl]

Talking of blogs, Petite, you might want to take a look at this one....

https://www.sleepsense.net/blog/should-my-child-be-sucking-her-thumb/

 

[Foogirl]

Having a good look at these blogs, here's one about going to one nap.....

https://www.sleepsense.net/blog/when-should-my-toddler-move-to-one-nap-per-day/

 

[Cattia]

HI all!

Welcome to the new people! Petite, sounds like you are doing amazingly! It must feel better already

Hi ladies

Could i just ask a question or 2?
How do u ladies determine (sp?) whether u think ur LO is waking cause they want a feed or just waking for habit??

Harrison has gone through the night about 3 times, but usually he wakes 1-2 times during the night but firstly i do the dummy thing and sometimes he goes back off after about 30mins of chatting to himself, but then sometimes he doesnt go off atall so i end up feeding him, but not sure if im making it a habit for him iykwim

I dont understand why he slept through the odd nights but still wakes most of the time?

Please, any advice would be great

Hi Rach,
I didn't stop Abigail's night feeds until she was seven months, fully weaned and well established on three good meals a day. That way I knew she had eaten plenty enough during the day to not be hungry at night. I felt confident then that I wasn't depriving them. I was expecting it to be hell but actually we had a few nights of protest and then she didn't even wake up for them any more, so I know she was ready! I think with sleeping through it can be pretty hit and miss at first. My Heath Visitor advised me to drop the night feed once we were fully weaned, but I know lots of people here still do it, so I also think as well as them being ready you have to be ready and happy to do it too. Hope that helps!

 

[PetiteMoi]

Thanks ladies. I think part of me was thinking our LO was still too young. I have the info and plan on reading through it in the next couple of nights. Since you both started this with LO's around the same age as my William, do you have any advice that isn't in the program? Any pointers?

I don't know why, but I'm nervous just thinking about Will being on his own. Currently we co-sleep and it isn't going well as I'm an 'all you can eat buffet'. No one is sleeping.

I would say, share the first few nights with your other half if possible! It helped us a lot as the first nights can be quite challenging and it helps a lot if you have someone there to talk to and you can support each other etc. As for the rest I think it's best you read the programme and get started - you'll have lots of questions then and the answers will make more sense Good luck!

 

[PetiteMoi]

Cattia - thanks! Yes it feels great We've only had a few difficult nights due to teething - but she's definitely got the hang of it now, as when she's not suffering from teething pain she settles really, really well with no crying.

As for night feeds - it's a really difficult one and I struggle with it myself. My LO wakes for two night feeds at the moment which I think it's too much but on the other hand she settles straight away afterwards which to me would indicate that she actually needs it, and she wakes up at different times so it's not as if she's got used to being fed at specific times, she might just simply be hungry!

 

[polaris]

Having a good look at these blogs, here's one about going to one nap.....

https://www.sleepsense.net/blog/when-should-my-toddler-move-to-one-nap-per-day/

I thought Thomas might be ready to move to one nap so we gave it a try for about three or four days and it didn't really work, he was overtired and a bit cranky and generally wired by about 5.30/6 p.m. The odd day if he sleeps in late we can only manage to fit in one nap and I try to put him to bed early to make up for it. But generally he still has two naps. I wake him after 45 minutes to an hour of his morning nap as otherwise he would sleep for two hours and then refuse to take an afternoon nap - but he would be totally wired by bedtime. I have come to the conclusion that he is still much better on two naps for the moment.

 

[rachxbaby1x]

HI all!

Welcome to the new people! Petite, sounds like you are doing amazingly! It must feel better already

Hi ladies

Could i just ask a question or 2?
How do u ladies determine (sp?) whether u think ur LO is waking cause they want a feed or just waking for habit??

Harrison has gone through the night about 3 times, but usually he wakes 1-2 times during the night but firstly i do the dummy thing and sometimes he goes back off after about 30mins of chatting to himself, but then sometimes he doesnt go off atall so i end up feeding him, but not sure if im making it a habit for him iykwim

I dont understand why he slept through the odd nights but still wakes most of the time?

Please, any advice would be great

Hi Rach,
I didn't stop Abigail's night feeds until she was seven months, fully weaned and well established on three good meals a day. That way I knew she had eaten plenty enough during the day to not be hungry at night. I felt confident then that I wasn't depriving them. I was expecting it to be hell but actually we had a few nights of protest and then she didn't even wake up for them any more, so I know she was ready! I think with sleeping through it can be pretty hit and miss at first. My Heath Visitor advised me to drop the night feed once we were fully weaned, but I know lots of people here still do it, so I also think as well as them being ready you have to be ready and happy to do it too. Hope that helps!

Cattia
Thanks for ur post, Harrison is on 3 meals a day now as we started weaning at 4 months due to reflux and he also doesnt drink alot of milk. Which is why I find it hard to determine whether he needs the night feed or not, as i said he has 3 meals a day and has averagely 15-18 oz milk in 24 hrs depending on if he has a night feed. He is very fussy with milk and has never seemed bothered by it. I read lots of babies on here and my friends babies are all big milk drinkers, like draining 7oz bottles every feed + solids, but my little Harribo isnt bothered, he just has a am bottle and a bedtime bottle and if i can persuade him to have a afternoon bottle also. I guess its just a waiting game
Thanks for your post hun, its nice to share experiences on here xxxxxxxxxx

 

[rachxbaby1x]

Hi ladies

Could i just ask a question or 2?
How do u ladies determine (sp?) whether u think ur LO is waking cause they want a feed or just waking for habit??

This is probably the one question I can't answer! I'm not sure anyone can! You know your LO best. If you think they need the feed, then give it.

We would just settle her without offering it and she went back to sleep.

This blog from Dana may help

https://www.sleepsense.net/blog/is-my-child-waking-because-hes-hungry/

Whilst you're there, take a look on the right hand side, there may well be other blogs which can help.

Thanks Foogirl Ill take a look xxxx

 

[chrissie33]

Katie wakes currently at 11 for her feed but I am hoping she will start to sleep through of her own accord as otherwise I will have to encourage her in the next week or so. With night feeding, the one way I knew Katie was doing it for comfort, not hunger was when she would feed just for a couple of mins before going back to sleep. This suggested that she didnt actually need it and the fact she now goes without the mid night feedings shows she is not hungry. I have noticed that she is eating better in the day now too....

I fed her tonight, put her down and she was awake when I left the room - a couple of little moans and 3 mins later!!! she is fast asleep.... she didn't wake at 4 last night so we had a better sleep

Your support has helped immensely girls - I couldn't have got through the first few nights without you xx

 

[Foogirl]

I thought Thomas might be ready to move to one nap so we gave it a try for about three or four days and it didn't really work, he was overtired and a bit cranky and generally wired by about 5.30/6 p.m. The odd day if he sleeps in late we can only manage to fit in one nap and I try to put him to bed early to make up for it. But generally he still has two naps. I wake him after 45 minutes to an hour of his morning nap as otherwise he would sleep for two hours and then refuse to take an afternoon nap - but he would be totally wired by bedtime. I have come to the conclusion that he is still much better on two naps for the moment.

Abby is the same. She's 17 months (corrected) and when she's at home with us, 1 nap a day just aint enough. She is pooped after being up for about 2 and a half hours in the morning, but does manage a longer stretch before taking a nap mid afternoon. At nursery she sleeps about 45 minutes the whole day, but does generally take a nap in the car on the way home. I reckon when she is with us, she is just catching up on what she misses the 3 days she's at nursery.

 

[chrissie33]

So pleased tonight... just put Katie in her cot awake after her bath and feed and she didn't even cry Hopefully we will all manage a decent sleep from here How is everyone else doing?

 

[PetiteMoi]

chrissie - that's great It's so nice isn't it when they don't cry. Our little one has now had five nights in a row with no crying, it's great. Hope it continues like this for us!

 

[Foogirl]

So pleased tonight... just put Katie in her cot awake after her bath and feed and she didn't even cry Hopefully we will all manage a decent sleep from here How is everyone else doing?

chrissie - that's great It's so nice isn't it when they don't cry. Our little one has now had five nights in a row with no crying, it's great. Hope it continues like this for us!

Great news!

 

[PetiteMoi]

Hello folks! We're visiting family in Sweden at the moment, staying with my mum. I'm trying to keep to the bed time routine and to make it as similar as possible to at home. She's in a travel cot in our room (guest room). She wouldn't settle very easily tonight (she normally goes down without even crying now) and cried quite angrily - I put some teething gel on her as that helped the other night but it didn't help now. I then picked her up and fed her again, as this sometimes calms her, and it did work! She fell asleep straight away ( in her cot, I wouldn't let her fall asleep on the boob).

Couple of questions:

1. Is it ok to calm her by feeding her?? If I don't let her fall asleep, just making her
sleepy enough to fall asleep in her cot?

2. When on holiday is it really worth "starting over" and letting her cry for an hour or more if she doesn't settle (I expect her to wake up a few times as there has been a lot of new impressions for her today plus she's in a strange bed etc)? I suppose I haven't got another choice..?!

I'm on my own here with her as hubby is coming later this week so it's hard work - mum's good support but I don't want her to spend time in lo's room as it will probably confuse her more than comfort her...

Hope it's all going well for you all xxx

 

[Arcanegirl]

Im not sure what others opinions would be, but i would try and stick to routine as much as possible, but where its not working just settle her any way you can and resume normal routine when youre home again.

 

[Foogirl]

Hello folks! We're visiting family in Sweden at the moment, staying with my mum. I'm trying to keep to the bed time routine and to make it as similar as possible to at home. She's in a travel cot in our room (guest room). She wouldn't settle very easily tonight (she normally goes down without even crying now) and cried quite angrily - I put some teething gel on her as that helped the other night but it didn't help now. I then picked her up and fed her again, as this sometimes calms her, and it did work! She fell asleep straight away ( in her cot, I wouldn't let her fall asleep on the boob).

Couple of questions:

1. Is it ok to calm her by feeding her?? If I don't let her fall asleep, just making her
sleepy enough to fall asleep in her cot?

2. When on holiday is it really worth "starting over" and letting her cry for an hour or more if she doesn't settle (I expect her to wake up a few times as there has been a lot of new impressions for her today plus she's in a strange bed etc)? I suppose I haven't got another choice..?!

I'm on my own here with her as hubby is coming later this week so it's hard work - mum's good support but I don't want her to spend time in lo's room as it will probably confuse her more than comfort her...

Hope it's all going well for you all xxx

If a feed forms part of her routine, then that's fine. Rule of thumb is, don't start any habit you wouldn't continue at home. Stick to the routine, she will settle. If you change too much, you'll be back to square one when you get home.

 

[polaris]

Im not sure what others opinions would be, but i would try and stick to routine as much as possible, but where its not working just settle her any way you can and resume normal routine when youre home again.

That's the approach that I would take too. Whenever we've been on holidays with Thomas I have really done my best to keep his routine as similar as possible. But if you do have to settle her with a feed I don't think it's really a big deal, you might have to deal with a bit of protest when you get home if it becomes a habit but it might be easier to just get her settled and deal with possible protest at home. I think it depends on how long you are going to be away for too.

 

[PetiteMoi]

Thanks for your advice on how to cope on holiday - it went better than I thought but I had to make certain compromises, like every time I put her down after feeding her she wouldn't settle so I picked her up and fed her again (just for the comfort) and then put her back (awake) again. She also had teething problems a couple of nights so gave her some calpol. Now we're back home she's used to getting fed again to settle which I'm trying to get away from so she's crying lots again

My mum wasn't quite on board with our method either, as she felt sorry for LO when we didn't pick her up when she cried (just soothed her by stroking her etc) and she's made me feel really bad about not picking her up now when she cries. Mum meant that if babies cry they need you and if you ignore their cries they will feel abandoned and that however much they cry no one will help them. But is it not so that if you're there reassuring them they should feel you're there for them? I feel all confused now and feel soooo bad hearing her cry now I even picked her up and sang to her during my 'stint' just now but it didn't help -well it did settle her while I was doing it but she started crying when I put her down again. Plus hubby doesn't like me doing that at all since he thought it worked so well when we didn't pick her up and just dealt with her crying, which it DID but I feel bad now.

I think she might be teething still too but not sure - I hate not knowing whether I should give her medicine or not as I don't want to do it if it isn't actually teething, just tiredness or whatever.

Sometimes parenting is so hard isn't it

 

[hivechild]

I'm glad the holiday went pretty well PetiteMoi! I'm flying back to Australia March 14 (just Ronan and I on the flight over and OH is coming over 2 weeks later), and I'm already dreading the flight and jetlag as he adjusts to the time change!

I don't know what to suggest. I think I kind of agree with your husband that if you went through all that you went through to get where you did, that it would be a shame to throw it all away now. On the other hand, sometimes they do need a little extra love and comfort but like you said, it's so hard to know!

 

[Arcanegirl]

I hate when people say the babies feel abandoned because theyre being left to cry. Makes me think of the NSPCC adverts and what we do is far far from that
Were not abandoning them at all, but helping them learn new skills to use for the rest of their lives.