Sleep Sense Support Group!

[TennisGal]

Hi ladies,

Will catch up on the thread shortly...just wanted to say, am an awful Mummy. Was cutting DDs nails in her sleep, as they were long...and she'd scratched her leg...and she jolted and I cut her thumb

She can't suck her thumb properly now, and keeps looking confusedly at her hand...

This is her main way of settling, and she's really grumpy.

Happened once before when she was v.young, but thought I'd got it sorted with these blunt mothercare scissors

I feel hideously bad.

Will be back shortly...welcome Mindz.

 

[history_girls]

Evening all - what a mixed last night was for everyone!

LO with her cold was a grump yesterday so when she woke at 9am I succombed to the dummy but then didn't hear from her until 6.30am so was really proud of my little snot queen.

The big new in the HG household is that Mr HG has broken his hand and his writing and doing hand at that I don't know how but somehow when putting the rubish out last night he left one hand in the gate area opened the bin with the other and the wind slammed the gate shut on it. So only went to A&E this morning and came home all bandaged up. He can hardly do anything! no washing up, no carrying anything that needs to hands........ can just about pick the baby up but without childbearing hips like mine doesn't get on well. It is going to be a long wait for it to mend.....

TG - don't feel too bad. I sniped a little to close to LO's finger last time I cut her nails and didn't notice I'd cut her until after her nap and wondered where all the blood had come from.

Polo - fab night! Hope you get a repeat tonight. Good sleep is such a treat. I used to do a puzzler to help pass the time.....

Poppy don't give up! I did and then had to start again two weeks later. It will take a while for them to learn the new routine. A few weeks ago I had nights where I was up loads. I think sometimes they are developing so quickly it interupts their sleep. one night LO was up about a dozen times and next day she mastered sitting on her own.

Hive - glad you had a better night. Your bailey is gorgeous in the photo!

Mindz - welcome

Cattia - I left all school work at school getting good at doing that! except I might write a script for my tuotr group#s assmbly over the weekend. Got to think of a football world cup theme....

 

[Foogirl]

Poor you TG, if it makes you feel better, we've all done it!

AG, you're doing fine leaving when whinging. It will subside, I promise!

Poppy, not what you'll want to hear, but I think the problem will be that you still give the dummy at bed and nap times. The point of ss is to remove sleep props and teach self settling. With the dummy he's not getting the chance to learn that. Of course it is hard to take it away and he will be upset for a couple of days, but once that's done you will see such a great improvement and the crying will be less. Night wakings will be fewer as he will know how to put himself back to sleep. To get the best results, you've to commit to following the programme.

 

[polo_princess]

Aww TG, dont beat yourself up, go read the bad mothers guilt free confessional in baby club, that will make you feel better

Brooke was falling asleep at like 6.30 tonight so i managed to drag it out until 7, she took about 20 minutes to settle to sleep. She's woken once since but only briefly, took about 15 mins to resettle.

So maybe tonight is going to be a rough one like last night should have been

 

[history_girls]

positive thinking Polo!! Maybe she has done all of her waking up already!!!

 

[jacs]

Aw,TG, I'll reply properly, but just wanted to send

It'll all be forgotten about in no time (although you, no doubt, will beat yourself up for it for ages!)

 

[shampain]

Ive still not properly caught up on this thread! Sorry ladies!
AG i would leave Alex if hes just making noises!
Polo... i thought night 2 would be awful and it wasnt too bad! Good luck Ladies!
xx

 

[Poppy7]

Poppy I totally hear what you're saying about glorified CIO, we've had a hideous day and I'm expecting a hideous night. Begining to doubt myself and the program

You have done better than me hun. Keep going, I'm sure you will see massive improvements soon. It is hard though isn't it? Whilst writing this OH has just gone back up to settle little man down again....that's the second time since putting him to bed at 7pm...

Aw, it's so frustrating - if only they could tell you what they want!
If he's waking for the dummy, then that could be a lot of the problem. Do you feel brave enough to swap it for a blankie? Evan is a fab sleeper now, but he wouldn't be if he didn't have blankie to suck and cuddle. We forgot it a while ago at my mum's house, and there was no way he would nap. Eventually he settled with a face-cloth!
Try not to think of CC/CIO as being that similar to SS - there is no way you are abandoning LO. If you jump in too fast you could be interrupting his wind-down, and prolonging his awake time (even though you are just trying to comfort him!). At this stage, yes, he will cry, but you can shorten the time he will cry by letting him figure it out. That way he'll learn quicker what to do next time he goes to bed. You can be there, but try to hold back unless he REALLY needs you. It's so hard, I know!
That said, you're mummy and you know best. If you think he's unwell or needs a feed, do whatever you need to!

He has a comforter as well as his dummy (he has two in fact). He is attached to them but just not like his dummy. It's so hard as I said I would never do CC or CIO but SS means I still have to hear him sob.

Poppy, not what you'll want to hear, but I think the problem will be that you still give the dummy at bed and nap times. The point of ss is to remove sleep props and teach self settling. With the dummy he's not getting the chance to learn that. Of course it is hard to take it away and he will be upset for a couple of days, but once that's done you will see such a great improvement and the crying will be less. Night wakings will be fewer as he will know how to put himself back to sleep. To get the best results, you've to commit to following the programme.

Foogirl I know that what you are saying makes complete sense and it absolutely true. I have just discussed the dummy ditch with OH. He thinks it is a great idea but he knows how much it will distress me. The problem is that I know that once that flipping dummy is gone he will sleep better and nap better. His naps are short as he wakes during the light sleep transistion and then needs the dummy. Saying that this morning he slept for 1 hour and 20 minutes after settling with the dummy. This onyl happens about once a week though.

Damn dummy.....if I could rewind time I would never have given him one. Mind you, if I knew then what I know now a lot of things would be different. He's the most perfect little boy but I do believe we create these problems ourself. However, being a new Mum you naturally want to cuddle, nurse, rock your baby.

 

[TennisGal]

I'm worried she'll forget how to suck her thumb...and she looks so cute, she uses her other hand to hold it in her mouth AND she loves it for settling

Right, keep faffing - back in a bit!!

 

[shampain]

TG please dont feel bad, accidents happen! Ive done loads of stupid stuff to Paddy! I smacked him over the head with my camera today...oppps! x

 

[polo_princess]

Poppy, Brooke still has a dummy now, i intended to wean her off it at 12 months but we've been trying allsorts to sort her sleep it ended up being forgotten about.

Im still letting her have it atm because its not something she's dependant on and seems to be phasing it out herself so im going to see how this goes for a few weels and then if it goes well i'll work on getting rid of that next.

 

[Poppy7]

You're lucky that she's not dependant on it Polo. I never thought Elliott was but since fixing one prop it has made the dummy worse!

WELL......Elliott just woke up for his dummy again....with OH's help I was really brave and left him for 5 minutes. I then went up and comforted him. I DID NOT replace his dummy. 20 mins later and he stopped crying. 5 minutes longer and he's gone back to sleep! I know he can do it as he proved that the other night and again tonight. Hopefully with OH home again with me I can be stronger as I know the outcome will be a happier baby.

 

[polo_princess]

Even after one night i think it definatley helps if you can do this with your partner so its kind of like a tag team, giving eachother moral support

Brooke has stirred again twice since last time and resettled within the 3 minute mark so i didnt even have to go up to her, she wasnt crying, jusy whingeing

 

[Foogirl]

Damn dummy.....if I could rewind time I would never have given him one. Mind you, if I knew then what I know now a lot of things would be different. He's the most perfect little boy but I do believe we create these problems ourself. However, being a new Mum you naturally want to cuddle, nurse, rock your baby.

Don't be so quick to berate yourself! I started out with an absolutely no way no dummy rule. That went out the window quick sharp when she got colic. Unfortunately she just wouldn't take it so we just had to deal with it and I became her full time dummy for about a week. Of course, now I'm glad she didn't as I never had to go through getting rid of it, but at the time it was torture!

Just bear in mind that getting rid of it now will be much easier than doing it later when you are having to deal with a toddler tantrum!

As you say, you know he can settle himself without it, you just have to go through the first couple of nights of protest. And it really whould only be a couple of nights before he gets the message. Perhaps your OH can deal with the worst of it on those nights?

AG's suggestion of an Ipod is a great one too!

 

[Arcanegirl]

WEll ive found the reason for recent unsettled nights, a tooth!

 

[hivechild]

TG, don't feel bad about cutting your LO. I did it the first time I ever cut Ronan's nails! Luckily it was just a little bit and he didn't even seem to notice or care. I know what you mean about the thumb sucking though. Ronan tries and occasionally succeeds at getting his thumb in his mouth but quite often just ends up sucking on his fist. It's painful to watch him try and get to it though as he's smacking himself in the face repeatedly!

AG, hopefully he'll start sleeping better now that his tooth has cut through.

Here's hoping the rest of your night goes ok PP. It's promising that she's settling quickly on her own though!

Poppy and Bump, stay strong. You really do have to dedicate yourself to it wholeheartedly and let them figure it out for themselves. When we are frustrated and learning something new, we can rant and vent in ways babies can't. All they can do to express their frustration is to cry. If they get genuinely distressed, then calm and soothe them of course but have faith that they can do it, and will figure it out!

 

[Bumpontherun]

Sorry for slightly histrionic post last night ladies. Feeling much more positive today yesterday was so busy. We had a 30 min ss nap 1st thing but then so many visitors she didn't get a chance to sleep. She fell asleep whilst I was feeding her in a resturant and slept in my arms for 30 mins. Then she dozed in the car for 10 mins on way home.

At 6pm she was really tired and DH tried to put her down for a nap. She cried for 40 mins, eventually she got so upset she was almost choking so DH picked her up.

Strangely she wad really cheery after this, me and DH were in pieces. I fed her we did her bedtime routine and put her to bed at the usual time and much to my surprise she settled after 9 mins of grumbling. We had 30 secs of crying about an hr later then nothing til 4:30. After her feed I put her straight back in the cot put the mobile on and left. After 15 mins I heard a few sobs and then nothing until 6:45.

Probably our best night ever.

Not going out today although many visitors so need to get back on the horse with naps.

TG I hope the thumb is better and you have got over your guilt. I haven't cut H yet but only a matter of time!
AG congrats on the tooth!
Poppy how was the rest of your night?

 

[Poppy7]

Well that was a rough night but I know it will be worth it. Elliott woke up 9 times! Twice I fed him and he was genuinely hungry. Everytime the crying did get less and he went back to sleep quicker. I felt awful but so glad OH was here with me.

Should I continue the no dummy rule for naps as well today, I'm guessing start as you mean to go on otherwise DS will get confused and that isn't fair.

Foogirl you're right. The dummy was a great help for the colicky nights it's just so easy to blame yourself when you are sleep deprived. It also doesn't help that my wisdom tooth is now extremely painful and swollen and adding to my woes!

Thank you for listening to me last night and helping me to stay strong. I really appreciate the support. Sorry for getting so negative but I do believe that we can do this and Elliott's sleep will drastically improve as a result which will be so much nicer for him.



AG...glad to hear about the tooth. It is nice when you find the reason!

Bump...it's easy to feel negative I know that but let's push in through. What a great night you had after a bumpy start. You must be so pleased with the results you are getting so far. Good luck with your naps today.

 

[polo_princess]

AG hope this tooth eases up from Alex

You made it through another night Poppy, well done

So last night was a bit of a mixed bag for us .. Brooke did sleep in her own bed all night however it was broken, she had us up and down 2 or 3 times i think, and then she whinged inbetween but managed to fall back to sleep herself.

 

[Cattia]

AG - a tooth - hooray!

TG - you might remember my thread from a week or so back when I did the same thing. I felt HORRIBLE! Anyway - this will make you laugh - we put a plaster on it, and she was trying to suck her thumb through the plaster (it was her sucking thumb that I cut as well and I was worried that she would swallow the plaster. Then I noticed that her had blood in her mouth and that she was sucking blood through the plaster! I was freaked out, I had images of her bleeding to death, so DH and I decided to take her down to the minor injury unit at the hospital! It was a Sunday afternoon and when we got there people were queuing out into the corridor to be seen and there was about a two hour wait. DH said 'maybe we should take the plaster off before we sign in and just have another look'. We took her outside, took the plaster off,and the cut was soooooo tiny you could barely see it! We sheepishly got back in the car and drove home. Not too sure the nurses would have been very impressed if we had waited two hours to show them that!

Anyway, back to the thread..... HG sorry your LO has a cold. Sadly I think I have woken up with one this morning. Got that little tickle in the back of the throat. Hope LO doesn;t catch it, we are going away on holiday on Friday. Well done for leaving the work at school! I am determined to do the same! I can't help with the assembly, the only way I even knew there was a world cup is because I keep seeing T shirts saying England in the shops.

Polo- sounds like another really good night to me! Although she was a little active, the fact that she settled herself down to sleep is fantastic! Seems like you have a fast learner there.

Poppy - stay strong! I think Foogirl os right about the dummy, although it will be hard to do, he won't remember it and bring it up when he's 18! (that's what I always tell myself when I feel bad about something).

Bump - relly good progress, well done to you and your LO! Keep positive, and think how far you have come already. Great that she settled so well last night too.


Well, our night was a mixed bag again. She woke at 11.45, and I left her for ten minutes, but the crying was escalating so I fed her, thinking that she could well be hungry. She then didn't wake again until 4am, when I heard her massivly fill her nappy, so I had to get her up and so fed her again, although I do wonder if I could have left her at that point to re-settle without feeding. Polo - we still feed on demand but I know she can go seven hours at night as she's done it before. Anyway, she is getting grouchy now so off for the first nap of the day.